Confessing History (Freehope Book 3)

by Jenni M. Rose

  Hours later, Beth stepped out of the bathroom dressed in her best jeans and a cute top. Her friend had scored them a dinner reservation at the casino’s top restaurant. It helped that it was a Sunday night. Probably not their busiest time and they were happy to have paying customers.

  Logan was dressed in a nice pair of khakis with a dress shirt.

  “Please don’t tell me you have a sport coat,” she said, slipping on some dangly earrings. “Then I’ll be way underdressed.”

  “No sport coat,” he confirmed. “Didn’t even bring one. This is about as formal as I’m going to get.”

  She smiled and hoped he didn’t notice how forced it was. “Good. I think this will be as fancy as we’re going to be this trip, don’t you?”

  He nodded his agreement.

  She slipped on a pair of heels, one of two pairs she had in her bag from cruising, and shoved a few things in her purse.

  “Are we ever going to see this friend of yours that hooked you up with the room?” Logan asked.

  “Tonight,” she answered. Her friend Suzie had promised to meet up with them. Beth knew it was mostly to lay eyes on Logan and not much else, but she appreciated the hospitality. Besides, she and Suzie had been working together for a few years and had gotten close. Hell, when you share a room on a ship with someone, you’d better be close.

  She knew all about Logan and what had transpired between them. She’d been there before Beth met Logan and after. She knew everything in between, too.

  There wasn’t a chance on God’s green earth Suzie was missing out on meeting him.

  Beth looked in the dresser mirror to see Logan absently rubbing his thigh. She wondered if it was sore or bothering him. Maybe he needed some rest and she shouldn’t be making him run all over the hotel.

  She thought about the conversation she’d overheard when he was in the bathroom.

  She’d been dozing off on the bed, enjoying the comfort and quiet. A soft click of the door had pulled her out of her slumber and she’d heard the deep bass of his voice through the wooden bathroom door.

  He’d been talking to Owen, and though she shouldn’t have listened, there was no way to not hear. He was practically in the same room, the bathroom door thin enough to hear every word.

  Ouch.

  To say the very least.

  She’d laid there for long minutes, pondering the things she’d heard Logan say about her. It wasn’t shocking to hear that he wasn’t interested in a future with her. She’d put him through hell in the last year, and that was saying nothing of the things he’d gone through on his own.

  It didn’t make it sting any less. And to hear him say it out loud made it so much more real.

  So, she’d thought about it and sat there, hurting for a little while. She’d had a little pity party and buried her dream that Logan would look up and finally see that they were on the same page and could be together.

  Problem was, now that she was on the right page, he was on the wrong one.

  It seemed to be that was how they were. Always one step away from each other when it counted.

  She’d sat up, her back to the bathroom as he finished his call, and shook off the hurt. So, her plan of getting together and riding off into the sunset with Logan wasn’t going to work out. She’d have to adjust.

  It was time to put her money where her mouth was. If she really loved Logan and wanted what was best for him, she needed to put her needs aside. She had to refocus on getting him better and still, if that didn’t include her in the end, so be it.

  She got the feeling she’d have to remind herself that every moment of every day that she spent with him, but that was okay.

  All that mattered was that Logan could see his future in the world, even if she wasn’t in it.

  “You okay?” Logan asked, breaking her spell.

  She’d been staring at the top of the dresser for who knows how long.

  “Yeah, just spaced out, I guess.” Her eyes flipped up to meet his in the mirror. “You look nice.”

  He didn’t smile but returned the compliment. “You too.”

  “How’s Owen?” she asked, grabbing her purse and a sweater.

  He eyed her for a minute; she imagined wondering how much of his conversation she’d heard.

  “He’s fine. I guess Andy and Alex are having some kind of thing with their phones?”

  Beth chuckled as they headed out the door and into the hallway. “If you asked them, they’d tell you it’s a twin thing. Not only did they both get the same phone without knowing what the other one got, they also got the same case. Now they keep accidentally picking up the other one’s phone. I called Andy the other night and got Alex instead.”

  “I’m sure that went over well.”

  Beth and Alex had a notoriously rocky past. Where Andy was more the type of sister to talk things out and help you find your own answers, Alex was more the type to whack you upside the head and yell at you.

  They’d gotten closer in the last year. With Andy so caught up in Owen, Beth and Alex had no choice but to turn to each other.

  Most days it went okay. Some, not so much.

  “To her credit, she did try to talk me out of the stripping thing. Not that I listened, but there it is, for whatever it’s worth.”

  He stood opposite her on the empty elevator, leaned back against the wall, arms across his chest. There was a small smile playing around his mouth, his green eyes lit with humor.

  “Should I bother asking why you didn’t listen?”

  “Probably not,” she admitted. “But, she tried. She also conceded about five seconds later and tried to work out my stripper name.”

  Logan scoffed. “Everyone knows it’s your middle name and the street you grew up on.”

  Beth’s eyebrows shot up and she laughed. “Seriously? What’s yours?”

  His smile widened and he shook his head. “I can’t tell you.”

  “What?” She laughed and pointed at him. “You brought it up. Now you have to tell me!”

  “I can’t. It’s too embarrassing.”

  Beth closed in on him, close enough that she could put her hands on his forearms that were crossed over his chest.

  She sent him a serious look. “I promise, I won’t tell.”

  The ping of the elevator interrupted their quick moment, and Beth scowled at the numbers above the door, as if it might take the hint that it had terrible timing.

  Logan put a hand on her lower back and ushered her out into the hallway. They followed the signs to the restaurant and were seated quickly.

  It was a nice place, upscale, but mostly empty. Their server took their drink orders, right after they were seated, and disappeared.

  Beth watched Logan from behind her menu as he seemingly read his. He’d combed his blond hair off to the side and it looked neat and tidy. Most days he left it off to the side where he pushed it off when it got in his way. He wasn’t clean-shaven, which was new, but not unattractive. She had no problems conjuring up what he might look like with a beard, and the result looked good on him.

  “Why aren’t you looking at the menu?” he asked, his eyes not looking up at her once.

  Because I’m looking at you, she wanted to say.

  “Sorry,” she said instead. “I was still on your stripper name.”

  One side of his lips quirked up and caught her eye. “Read the menu, Beth.”

  “Fine,” she grumbled, easily picking out a fish entree that sounded delicious. Her menu was closed and on the table in front of her within seconds. She grabbed a piece of bread out of the basket the server had left and slathered it with butter.

  “Have enough?” he asked, eyeing it.

  She shrugged. “I think so.” Her eyes lit up as she saw Suzie hurrying over to their table, her sights locked on Logan. “Suz!”

  They hugged and it felt so good to have someone to connect with. Being with Logan had been hard and not at all what she’d expected. He’d always been there to comfort her and without th
at, she felt like something was missing. Suzi’s arms, though just a friendly gesture, were better than nothing.

  “So good to see you,” Suzi murmured, her wild, shoulder-length black hair tickling Beth’s nose as they embraced. “You must be Logan.”

  Beth let her friend go and introduced them. Logan, ever the gentleman, stood and shook her hand, smiling politely. This was really the first time Logan had met one of her friends, someone outside of Freehope that knew her for who she was, not the family she came from.

  “If Beth would have given me more notice, I would have gotten the night off and shown you around some,” she said. “This place is huge. There’s a museum on the other side and another hotel. Plus there’s five different casinos.” She sent a look to Beth. “Best tables are in here if you’re planning to play. I’m on poker tonight for a tournament but there’s some good blackjack tables.”

  “I considered it,” Beth hedged. “If Logan was up to it.”

  Suzi eyed Logan up and down, having no idea what had transpired since they’d spoken last. She had no idea that Logan’s leg was no longer there and he was hiding a prosthetic under his long pants.

  “Logan looks up to just about anything, don’t you?” Suzi said to him as she pulled up a chair and they all sat.

  “I can be,” Logan answered playfully, the fun side of him, that Beth remembered, coming to the surface. “Though Beth here is the one that gets to have all the fun. Why, just yesterday she was talking with one of her sisters about trying to figure out what her stripper name was.”

  “Tell me more about the stripper name,” Suzie’s eyebrows bobbed up and down. “You mean your middle name and the street you grew up on?”

  “You’ve heard that?” Beth asked surprised. “That’s a thing?”

  Suzi sat back and crossed her arms, taking them both in. She was a nice-looking woman. Not model beautiful, but pretty enough that she was never lonely for long. Her hair was wild, much like the woman herself. Her dark eyes were complimented by her cocoa-colored skin, and she looked perpetually twenty. Beth had known her for five years and she hadn’t aged a day.

  “Of course, I’ve heard that.” Suzi laughed. “Mine’s Pearl Hobart.” She scrunched up her face. “Maybe that’s my porn name.”

  Beth nearly choked on her bread. “That’s the worst name I’ve ever heard.”

  “I know. It’s like the least sexy thing ever. What’s yours?” she asked Beth.

  Her eyes cut to Logan and back to Suzi. “Hollis Devine.”

  They both burst out laughing at her answer.

  “That actually sounds real,” Suzi wheezed.

  Even Logan, so serious lately, covered his mouth with his hand to hide his mirth.

  “I don’t feel so bad about mine now,” he coughed out between laughs. “Holly Divine.” He winked at her, but it was playful, not sexy.

  “It’s Hollis,” she corrected. “And you’re the only one that hasn’t shared yet. Let’s hear it.”

  He shook his head, the smile still on his face, but played along.

  “Beau Hancock.”

  Their laughter filled the restaurant and in that moment, Beth was even more thankful that the place was empty. She didn’t care what made Logan laugh like that, so open and free. As long as he felt like doing it, she’d take it.

  Two hours later, Beth sat at a blackjack table, a stack of chips in front of her and a sharp shot of adrenaline running through her veins. Winning was the ultimate high and she’d had a streak of luck at the table she was sitting at.

  Logan stood behind her like a sentinel, though she’d told him a couple times he could sit next to her. There was an empty chair and with the way she was winning, the dealer would have let him sit.

  He’d refused, standing guard over her and glaring at anyone and everyone that made a comment about her winnings.

  At first, he’d been almost surprised at her good fortune, smiling and nodding his head in appreciation. The more notice she gained, and the more people standing at attention and watching the hands that were dealt, the more serious he became.

  He’d gone from being her companion to being her bodyguard. Lord help her, but she loved it. The strong set of his shoulders as he stood, arms crossed over his chest. His gaze touched on everyone within range, assessing their threat level. She could feel his presence, as he watched their surroundings, and she felt safe.

  Just like she always had when she was with him.

  He hadn’t spent a penny in the casino. He seemed unfazed by the bright lights of the slot machines or the seriousness of the card tables. He’d told her he was content to watch, and if she wanted to play, he’d stay with her. Neither of them had ordered drinks, both of them stone-cold sober.

  She hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol in months, but that was another story for another time.

  The table she was at consisted of three men and another woman. The men ranged in age from retiree to frat boy, though she didn’t pay two of them much attention. The oldest was too drunk to get a handle on the cards being dealt, not just his own but the rest of the table’s. The kid was too young, playing fast and loose with the odds, and he’d be out in another hand, from the looks of things. The middle-aged man, however, was experienced. She could tell by the way he watched the cards that he knew what he was doing. He paid a lot attention to the cards around him and the way everyone else played. He had a significant amount of chips in front of him.

  The woman however, was nothing more than a thorn in her side.

  Gina, the front desk clerk, sat across from Beth, batting her eyelashes in Logan’s direction, trying to get his attention, barely looking at the cards on the table.

  To his credit, Logan had paid her no mind whatsoever. When she’d sat down, leaning over slowly as she did it, showing off her ample cleavage, he’d glanced at her and not an ounce of recognition passed over his face. It was as if he didn’t even remember her.

  Beth knew better. He knew exactly who she was, but he refused to play into her hands.

  As much fun as she’d had on the casino floor, Beth was ready to call it a night. The highlight of the night had been having dinner with Logan. Since she’d been playing, he’d been silent and while she appreciated the role he was playing, it wasn’t the kind of connection she wanted with him.

  She wanted him to be participating and having fun.

  “This is my last hand,” she said to the rest of the players and the dealer.

  “That’s too bad.” Gina pouted and winked in Logan’s direction. “I like the view from where I’m sitting.”

  “Mine will be better when I get him up to our room,” Beth snapped, tired of the woman’s not-so-subtle hints. “And you’re not invited, so if I see you take a step near him when we leave here tonight, I’ll file a formal complaint with the hotel.”

  The dealer chuckled under his breath and slid the cards across the green felt. He had a seven showing.

  Beth had always been lucky with cards, so when she got dealt nines, she wasn’t overly surprised. Gina, not a complete dolt, stayed at eighteen, took her payout and walked away, throwing a sultry glance at Logan.

  The kid hit on a fourteen and busted.

  The drunken retiree, did the same but on a seventeen.

  Moron.

  The middle-aged man in the suit took a hit on a king-three combo and got a seven, for twenty. He sent a nod in Beth’s direction, waiting to see her play.

  She split and raised her bets, hoping for good turns from the deck.

  The first hand was easy, the dealer flipping a another nine, and she split again.

  Liking her odds, she hoped she got a decent card or three. Hands like the ones she had could tank in a second. She consoled herself with the fact that even if she lost the hand, she was still walking out the door with more money than she went in with. It didn’t always work out that way.

  “Are you sure you want to do that?” Logan whispered in her ear. They were the first words he’d spoken in more than an hour.<
br />
  She turned her head and found his face right in front of her, her lips mere inches away from his.

  “Think I’m being too careless?” she asked, her voice low, keeping their conversation private.

  “Don’t put words in my mouth,” he said.

  At his words, her eyes flipped down to look at his mouth, so close to hers, and then back to his eyes.

  “What’s your suggestion then, Doc?” she asked.

  He shook his head. “No suggestions from me. You do your thing, Sugar.”

  She turned back to the table and tapped, waiting for her card.

  When the cards turned, she let out a breath as the middle-aged man next to her just shook his head, and the dealer laughed as he counted out her chips.

  The jack of spades and ace of diamonds stared up at her from the table.

  “Never seen someone so damn lucky,” the man in the suit said as he looked at her. He looked at Logan. “She always like this?”

  “No,” Logan told him honestly, his answer short and sweet.

  She went to take her chips but Logan beat her to it, taking them and then holding out an elbow for her. It was a gentlemanly gesture, one that surprised her, yet didn’t at the same time.

  Of course, Logan would take her elbow and lead her to the cashiers. It was the right thing to do.

  But he’d been so hot and cold with her, she wasn’t sure from one moment to the next if he even liked her, let alone wanted to touch her, even so innocently.

  When the man behind the glass partition counted out her money and handed it to her in cash, she smiled and thanked him, shoving it in her wallet.

  “Gas for the rest of the trip is on me,” she said, bumping him with her shoulder as they walked away.

  He didn’t look at her; he was far too busy scanning the people around them as they made their way back to their room. Down every hallway and past every door, he shielded her from some invisible threat.

  Beth said nothing, though she found his behavior a bit over the top. It wasn’t like rural Pennsylvania was a hotbed of criminal activity. Mostly, the casino was filled with people looking to cut loose from their regular lives for a day or two.