by JA Low
“Issy, I have to…” My confession is cut off from the ringing of her phone again. “Shit, got to go.” And with that she disappears out the door. Closing my eyes, I fall asleep wondering what my life would be like if I was really honest with her. How would we work? How would my desires work in a relationship with her? Could I be in one? Maybe it’s better if I am on my own, that way my desires can’t hurt anyone.
24
Isla
Three months later
Monaco
Things have been a little crazy for Vanessa and Christian’s bachelor and bachelorette parties in Monaco. We had an amazing couple of days in Paris with Yvette trying on the most gorgeous dresses for Vanessa’s wedding and eating amazing food prepared by Sebastien, Yvette’s hot, Spanish celebrity chef brother, for Thanksgiving, all in preparation for him cooking at their wedding. Derrick surprised us earlier in the night with three very naked male strippers. Vanessa was not so keen on sampling them, much to Derrick’s dismay so he instead set his sights on poor Olivia, Vanessa’s friend, who owns the castle she is getting married in. The poor girl confessed earlier she was getting married to some royal guy, who is a man whore. Olivia is not very experienced at all and doesn’t want to be a disappointment on her wedding night. Which sounds so horrible to be even considering marrying someone like that, but Olivia seems very loyal to her family, even if it means sacrificing her happiness. She was most certainly happy when she discovered the male strippers were naked under their aprons, her cheeks turning a very bright shade of red as she touched them. We, of course, thought it was hilarious because it wasn’t happening to any of us and because we were all very drunk, well, all bar Vanessa and Sienna.
We eventually moved on from the stripper show, after Derrick had his fix of them, and onto the casinos in Monte Carlo. All of us girls dressed up to the nines looking every inch the Bond girl we thought we were in that moment. Apparently, the boys were playing in a private high roller section of the casino. We crashed their party, much to the dismay of most of the guys except for Evan and Christian who were more than excited to catch up with their wives. We ignored the rumbles from the boys and continued partying in the room; dancing, having fun, enjoying the night for what it was; a celebration of freedom before tying one’s self to another for eternity. Even though Vanessa didn’t seem to mind being tied to Christian for life.
Before long it’s time to move onto The Paradise Club, I’m excited to be going back. The couples have decided to go back to their hotel rooms to get it on instead. They have no need to be traveling to the club when all they have is right there beside them. I’m not jealous at all, not one bit. Who am I kidding? I’m insanely jealous. Stepping from the limousine, the sexual tension between everyone swirls around us like a cloud. Nate, who owns the clubs and is great friends with the Dirty Texas boys, ushers us through. His staff hands us the colored bands. My kinky friends’ arms are laden with colorful bands as they descend into the club. Oscar and Stacey have disappeared, not that their relationship is any of my business, whatever it is they are doing. Well, I know what they are doing, but I mean relationship wise. My brother, as much as I love him, is a man whore, a kinky one at that, and Stacey, well she is quiet but I never suspected she was into certain things like my brother is. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe she is the kinkiest of all, who knows what happens behind closed doors or the doors of The Paradise Club. I watch as Nate and Camryn disappear under the guise of ‘work’. I know she is dating someone but Nate Lewis is smoking hot, plus he fills out a suit to GQ perfection. Derrick skips merrily past me with a big grin on his face, I reach out and grab his arm.
“What are you so happy about?”
“Just playing sex cupid, that’s all.” He taps my nose with his finger. I turn and see Axel’s attention drawn to Olivia, who’s wearing a deer caught in headlights face. “Don’t give me those judgey eyes, missy. She needs to have fun before she settles down to some stuffy, hot, royal dude.” Olivia is an adult, I am not one to judge, especially when Finn has left me alone, disappearing into the crowd.
“Least she’s safe with Axel.” Derrick smiles.
“So…” His dark eyes twinkle with mischief. “What are your plans for tonight? Is a certain Connolly brother on the cards?”
“You think I should hook up with Jackson?” Derrick’s eyes widen in shock which has to be a first.
“If that is what you desire, because that boy is fine as fuck, but you know exactly which one I am talking about.” He puts his hands on his hips.
“He’s disappeared. He obviously wants to have fun without us around.” Derrick looks out into the crowd.
“Maybe, or maybe he wants you to go find him.” Does he really think that is what Finn wants me to do? “Come on.” Derrick pulls me by the arm and walks me through the crowded bar area, taking me to the back where the stairs lead to the first level. The security personnel check out cards and then allow us to ascend. What happens if I see Finn with someone else? Like you haven’t a million and one times before. “Look in the cube.” Derrick points to the orgy happening inside the glass walls. It’s hot. My eyes are stuck on the three men pleasuring one woman, lucky girl. People are in different stages of undress, in different states of sexual activity. The sounds, the sexual tension filling the room all around me makes my skin feel hot. My thighs rub together; every nerve ending is like a powder keg ready to explode. Derrick is behind me; his mouth touches my ear making my jump.
“You okay if I, you know…” I nod, unable to take my eyes away from the image. He kisses my shoulder and disappears into the throbbing crowd. I watch as the sea of body parts move in time with one another, an erotic dance between its members. I really need to find someone to help me because if I don’t I think I am going to explode.
I move from the main area and down a long, dark corridor. There are rooms that have either a red or green light on out the front letting you know if it’s free or not. I move forward alone, red lights light most of the way, some with the blinds up, some with the blinds down. I stop and watch a couple having fun on some racks. She is tied to it and he is torturing her with dildos, a riding crop, his fingers and his mouth and the poor woman can’t even stop him when the sensation gets too much, she just has to take it, over and over and over again. You can tell she is loving it, though. Each time he stops to give her a moment to catch her breath, a satisfied smile floats across her face. Why can’t I have someone to torture me like that?
I’ve spent the past half an hour walking around the first level, no one really catching my attention and thankfully not catching Finn in a compromising position. I make my way up to the next level, again there is another cube, this time it’s a threesome, two men and a woman. I stand and watch with the rest of the crowd. I let my hand slip beneath the opening of my dress; I took my underwear off earlier just in case. My fingers slip easily between my thighs, through my slickness to my center. My cool fingers run over my clit, the needy throb of it beating a steady beat as I touch myself in the darkness. Maybe someone is watching me, maybe they might want to join in. Maybe I too could have two sets of hands touching me. I watch as the woman slides down over one man’s face and takes the other in her mouth, then I watch in fascination as the man whose dick is in her mouth starts jerking off the other man. My eyes widen, the heat between my legs turning up a couple of degrees, my fingers slipping easily between my folds.
“Do you need some help?”
25
Isla
My body stills, my eyes close because the last person I thought would be standing behind me while I touch myself is Finn Connolly. His broad chest presses against me, his hand snakes around my waist and follows my arm underneath the opening of my dress. His hand rests against mine, my fingers stop inside of me. “Touch yourself.” His warm breath slides across my shoulders sending goosebumps over my feverish skin. He puts pressure against my hand moving my fingers deeper inside of me, my body sags against him, his other hand rests on my hip, holding me in place a
gainst him. “Watch them, Issy. Watch how two men pleasure her. Worship her. Do you want that? Do want two men, Issy?” I hum against my lips at the thoughts rushing through my mind, picturing Finn and another man, maybe Tyler, touching me, caressing me, their mouths on my skin, their tongues lighting up my body, large hands skimming across my body, thick, calloused fingers pinching my nipples or sinking into me. The back of my dress lifts up, the cool breeze of the air conditioner caresses my exposed skin. Finn’s knee nudges open my legs, my fingers still deep inside of me. Then I feel the blunt head of him slide through my cheeks.
“Your fingers aren’t doing enough, are they?” I shake my head because he’s right. I need him inside of me, I want to feel full of him. I hear a crinkle and then he’s nudging my entrance, my fingers slipping from me. I bend forward ever so slightly to give him access and then he’s in me. His arm comes out and wraps across my body pulling me against him. I can feel him so deep inside of me in this position hitting the most sensitive corners of me. “Touch yourself, Issy, while I’m inside of you. I want you to come around me.” My fingers slip back over my sensitive clit as Finn starts to pump into me, holding me with all of his strength as he reaches the places no one has ever been able to reach.
“Harder,” I pant, as my head rolls back against his hard shoulder, my eyes never leaving the live porn in front of me.
“Watch the way those two men fuck her. Look at her. Imagine what it would be like to be her.” Of course that is exactly what I am imagining. “Let go, Is, let go to the fantasy.” That tips me over the edge as I come against him in time with the threesome in the cube. I suck in a couple of deep breaths, Finn fucks me harder, he’s lifted me off the ground as he turns almost feral, chasing the edge of his orgasm. All I do is hang on as he savagely takes me until his teeth sink into my shoulder and he comes. Holy hell, that was hot. I wrap an arm around Finn’s neck as he nuzzles me in the darkness, his panting breath against my ear.
“Fuck.” Was all he could say which made me giggle. “Just fuck.” His words make me smile. Finn slowly slips out of me and an ache fills the void. I let my dress fall down around me as I turn to face him. He’s fiddling with the condom and slips it into his pocket, not like there is a bin anywhere nearby. He grabs my face and kisses me. “You are so beautiful.” I hear the tenderness in his voice and it warms every inch of my soul. “Want more?” He raises his brows at me, those green eyes glowing with desire, lust and pure hunger. Yes, I do want more, if it means we can do that again.
Finn grabs my hand and pulls me through the crowd, he takes me down one of the narrow corridors and stops at a door with the words Dark Room written across it. What on earth is it? “The dark room is a huge play room. Many people come in and play. Not knowing who is touching you is quite liberating, intoxicating and pleasurable. Every two minutes the lights turn on then they go off again, a bit like strobe lighting.” Okay, at least you’re not completely blind, I guess. We push open the door and the sounds of sex hit our ears, the grunting, the moaning, the slapping, all in full volume. Finn’s hand tightens around mine then the light flicks on and we quickly see naked bodies moving on the floor, on the chairs, the beds, everywhere. I pull on Finn’s hand and stop, my heart is racing in my chest, I don’t think I can do this. It’s way too adventurous for me. I let go of his hand and rush back out the door, my eyes taking a couple of moments to adjust again to the dim light.
“Issy.” Finn steps out after me. “Are you okay?” Looking up into his eyes I can see his worry. “Have you? Do you?” I can’t finish my questions. I watch as his shoulders slump a little.
“What do you want me to say?” I frown at his answer, there’s an edge to his tone.
“Is that what you want from me?” I point to the door of the dark room. Finn looks at me for a couple of beats.
“You understand where we are, don’t you?” His eyes narrow at me. “You know that I come here.” What is he getting at? He rakes his hand through his hair looking a little frustrated and even a tiny bit flustered.
“Is this why you don’t want more with me?” He can’t look at me; his eyes find something interesting on the floor. “You like having sex with strangers in the dark, is that what you are trying to tell me? Is that your kink?” He scrubs his hand across his face.
“If only you knew…” His words are barely audible.
“Pardon?” He shakes his head. “Finn?” What’s got into him. “Do you have a kink?” Those sea green eyes pierce me.
“I…” His face turns a shade of red I’ve never seen on him before. “I have to go.” He walks away from me, his long legs eating up the floor before I even have a chance to go after him. What the hell is going on?
I don’t see Finn again after our argument last night. The night replays in my mind over and over as I rest in my luxury suite alone. Does Finn have some kind of fetish? Does he like sucking on women’s toes? Does he like to dress up as a dog or a horse? When I woke up I googled fetishes; that is not something you should do without coffee in your system. There are thousands of different fetishes and kinks. Is he ashamed to tell me about his and that’s why he pushes me away? I’ve been pondering that all day, especially as everyone seems to be off doing something with someone, which leaves me hanging by the hotel pool like a loner. The boys are staying on Nate’s super yacht; he’s having a party on there tonight, a big farewell to Christian’s bachelor ways. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be wild if Nate has anything to do with it, I mean the man owns sex clubs, you wouldn’t expect anything less.
There’s a knock on my hotel room door, I only have a couple of moments before we all have to be downstairs in the lobby for our taxi to the wharf. “Derrick?” I open the door questioning him. I notice he has a large garment bag with him.
“I don’t have time, my sugar plum.” He thrusts the white bag into my hands. “I need you to get changed.” I look down at my navy cocktail dress, I thought I looked nice. “Sweetheart, trust me, this dress…” He waves his finger around, “…is nice, but I want spectacular, I want to stop a man in his tracks dead. I want fucking awesome.” Derrick is dramatic most of the time especially when he has a crazy idea. I roll my eyes, I know better than to argue with this man. I carry the bag into the bathroom and hang it up and slowly unzip the bag. My eyes widen at the gorgeous, sheer nude and sequin fabric.
“Um, Derrick. I think you have forgotten bits of the dress.” I look at the sheerness of it.
“Nope, I didn’t.” I stick my head out of the bathroom.
“I can’t wear that.” His eyes widen at my comment, shocked as if anyone would not agree with his verdict.
“It has inbuilt everything.” He waves his hand at me. I return back to the dress. I can’t deny Derrick knows fashion and if he thinks I can pull off this dress then I guess I can. I quickly get changed and squeeze myself into the frock. Not going to lie, it’s beautiful. Thankfully, I’m small breasted because the plunging neckline would need a whole heap of tape for my big boobed sisters. He was right, there is an inbuilt bodysuit with it. I step out into the living room.
“I knew it. I just knew it.” He fusses over me. “Cinderella is going to the ball. Now come on. We need to convince Prince Charming that she’s worth slaying Ragnar for his fair maiden.” I think he’s getting his fairy tales mixed up.
26
Isla
This party is a whole lot crazier than I thought it would be. Poor Sienna, she’s been struck down with morning sickness and little Ryder is sick as well. Sienna decided to stay on land tonight, as did Evan. I mean even the man of the hour deserted the party hours ago with a sleepy Vanessa in his arms. The boat, sorry super yacht, which is probably the length of a football field if not more, is currently one massive frat party. There is a multitude of women walking around naked, there’s sex happening in the Jacuzzi, porn playing on the big screen, everyone is completely wasted. Not just on a serious amount of alcohol but also a heap of other stuff that I am sure is totally illegal, but who knows
we could be in international waters and the rules don’t apply.
Axel and Olivia haven’t stopped making out. Apparently, Axel took her out on a date today in the French countryside according to Derrick. Who knew Axel was a closet romantic. Stacey and Oscar have disappeared too; I do not even want to know what they are doing. Derrick is flittering around the deck as if he is the captain of a ship, commanding attention from all the single men, demanding they walk his plank. I’m sure he’s succeeded. Finn on the other hand, well he disappeared as soon as Tyler from Sons of Brooklyn joined me on deck. The girls have been circling Tyler all night, but being the great friend he is, he’s stuck by me.
“Ty, you don’t have to babysit me all night.” I nudge him with my elbow as another blonde eye fucks him from across the room.
“Babe, I’m not leaving you.” He gives me a smirk.
“Look, I’m going to go. I have a headache and I’m exhausted.” Tyler gives me a pout. “I’m not as young as you.” That makes him laugh and he pulls me into a big hug. “I can help walk you to the tender.”
“I’m just going to say goodbye to the rest of the crew and let them know I’m leaving. I’ll be ok.” I kiss his cheek. I love that he looks out for me, he’s such a good guy.
“Okay. Well text me when you get to the hotel so I know you’re safe.” This makes me smile. I give him a wave as I walk off. Moments later he has the blonde in his lap and they are sucking face. There’s a sea of people on board and I make my way through the crowd hoping to find someone I know.
Not finding anyone on this level, I climb down the stairs to the next one hoping to bump into someone. Further and further down the stairs I go, the quieter it gets, the throbbing in my head from the music isn’t as intense. I wonder if there are any headache pills in one of the bathrooms. There has to be at least a first aid kit somewhere. I continue walking through the maze that is this boat, trying different doors, getting kicked out, interrupting a hell of a lot of people having sex. I try another door and the room looks empty, a light shines under the closed bathroom door. I can’t hear anything, but my ears are ringing from the music. I push open the door and that’s when I realize the bathroom isn’t empty. What I wasn’t expecting was to see someone I know in the shower with another person. A person who is currently on their knees servicing him. My brain has stopped computing the image that I am seeing, because never in a million years did I ever expect this. Never. My stomach turns. The throbbing in my head comes back with a vengeance. He then looks over the brunette’s hair; those sea green eyes widen then look back to the person sucking his dick. This is why I will never be good enough for Finn Connolly. Finn’s hands push the brunette from him.