Blood-Red Tear
Page 18
He chuckled at my description. “It’s a little more complicated than that, but basically, yeah.”
Vampire stuff, as I was coming to learn, was always complicated, and unfortunately I was ignorant about his world. My family had kept much of their lives from me, and it was something I needed to correct if Aidan and I were to have any chance in the future. “Why can you hear me when no one else in my family can?”
He looked down. A gesture I was coming to understand meant he didn’t want to discuss something with me. “It’s something only I can do with you. There is a kind of bond between us that makes it possible.”
I knew there was more to it. My parents could communicate with each other the same way and I suspected Paul and Beth could, too, but I could see he was uncomfortable talking about it and wasn’t going to offer any more information.
“Surely there is something you need to be doing?” I asked when he made no move to leave my side.
“Nothing but taking care of you,” he said. “Would you like to watch a movie or some TV?”
“My TV is too small to really enjoy a movie, and I really don’t want to go through all of that commotion again to go downstairs right now. Maybe later.” I flinched as sharp pain shot up my leg, and he moved quickly to get me a cup of water and another pain pill. I took the pill without complaint, in far too much pain to be a martyr, and before too long I was once again fast asleep.
Chapter Seventeen
I woke up to find two men walking out of my room, their arms loaded down with tools and empty boxes. Aidan stood beside me, smiling guiltily, as I watched them go. “Aidan, what’s going on?” I looked behind him to where a huge flat-screen TV hung on the wall where once my small one had been, and frowned. There was no way I could have slept through that installation, and I realized he must have used some kind of compulsion to make sure I stayed asleep.
He looked guilty, and I knew he realized I had figured out his deception. “Well, you’re going to be stuck here for awhile, so I thought this would help. And besides, you need to rest, not be hauled around the house every time you want to watch a movie.”
“You shouldn’t have done this, and I do not need you messing with my mind to make me sleep!” I chastised him angrily. It was weird. I had never before felt so mad at him, but knowing he played with my mind set me off.
“I wanted to make you happy,” he said, looking puzzled by my upset.
“I get that,” I bit out, trying to remember that he had good intentions even if he went about them the wrong way. “But I am not one of your people. Do not use your mind control on me; I won’t have it,” I warned.
He frowned as if realizing for the first time he might have overstepped his boundaries. “I will try not to, but I was really only trying to think of your happiness.”
He looked at me with his big blue eyes and I caved. It was hard to stay angry at a gorgeous male who did everything he could to please you, and really it wasn’t like he had done it to hide something from me. “Fine, but don’t do it again.”
He smiled and my heart raced in response. “Now, what movie do you want to watch?”
I looked at the movies he had brought up from downstairs. Feeling mischievous, I choose the one I figured would aggravate him the most. “Bram Stoker’s, Dracula is definitely one of my favorites.” He pulled it from the shelf, sneering at the box. It was a popular remake of the old classic, and I couldn’t help but chuckle at his response. “I’m just kidding, Aidan. Paul brought it for me as joke a few years ago. He thought it would scare me into listening to his orders.”
He looked appalled at the idea. “I do not see the amusement of his scaring you.”
“I was giving him a hard time about being so bossy, and I kind of deserved it,” I admitted.
“For no reason should he have ever intimidated you like that. I will have to speak with him about his tactics.”
He looked so serious I feared he really would. “Don’t you dare. It was just a joke between brother and sister.”
“Not an amusing one,” he sneered.
“I probably deserved; it I was kind of being a brat.” I explained. “Just pick something else.”
“Oh, no, now that you have confided you were acting like a petulant child, you’re watching it,” he told me with a teasing smile. He loaded the movie into the Blu-ray player I had gotten from my parents for Christmas and lay next to me.
I laid my head on his shoulder as the movie began and he took my hand in his, resting it on my thigh. I stared up at him, overwhelmed by the emotions that raced through me, wishing I wasn’t so battered so I could do more than a watch a movie.
“Watch the movie,” he murmured.
I did as he asked and watched as the heroine was pulled to the vampire by some kind of compulsion. “Could you do that?” I asked shyly.
“I could, but most humans do not need that kind of compulsion.” He looked embarrassed but went on to explain. “They are just naturally attracted to us; our scent and looks are rather alluring to your kind.” I quickly decided that I did not like the thought of woman flocking around him but was careful to guard the thought so he would not read it. Jealousy was an ugly mistress, and I wouldn’t allow her to upset me.
As the movie went on I asked a lot of questions, wanting to sort fact from fiction. He answered my questions patiently, but I could tell he was ill at ease.
Before too long I was more interested in questioning him than watching the movie. “Is it hard to be around humans?” I could tell my question made him nervous but there was so much I needed to know, and for the first time he was opening up. “I mean, I know my family seems to be unaffected but they are around me all the time, so I figure they are, like, immune or something.”
“Do not let their ease with you lull you into a false feeling of safety. We always crave human blood. The older you get the easier it is to control, but there are times...” He looked away and I could feel his irritation with himself.
Images of the maddened desire-filled gaze on his face when he saw my blood drip from my hand at the accident filled my mind, and I shuddered. “When you are with me?” I finished for him.
“When I’m with you and we are close, it can be rather difficult,” he admitted ashamedly. “It doesn’t matter though, I will always leave if it gets too intense. I would never willingly harm you.”
I didn’t want him to hide his feelings from me like that. It wasn’t fair. “I need to know when that happens so I can avoid taunting you that way.”
He laughed shrilly. “You’re worried about me? You know what I am. You must know I could drain you of every last drop of your delectable blood, whether by design or accident, but still your concern is for me.”
“Of course it is. I am not scared of you.” I reached out and stroked his cheek. “I saw you at the accident, Aidan. I know how strong your desire was for my blood, and you didn’t give in to it.”
“You should be terrified of me after that incident,” he cried out bitterly. “I was so close to taking your blood that night. I saved you from that vampire, but I could have easily killed you myself.”
“But you didn’t,” I insisted.
“I could have, and you wouldn’t have stopped me,” he assured me with a groan. “Hell, I could have made you beg me to do it.”
“Paul would have stopped you,” I assured him.
He laughed arrogantly. “Paul could not have stopped me! He’s strong, but I’m stronger. You should be horrified by the fact I am a vampire who wants nothing more than to sink his teeth into your delectable neck.”
“I’m not.” He was right. I should have been but, oddly, I wasn’t.
He shook his head. “I begin to think you’re insane. You should run from me now, while you still can.”
It was my turn to shake my head. “I was raised by vampires; if they don’t scare me, why would you? Besides, I will not be running anywhere anytime soon.” I pointed to the cast on my leg and he grimaced.
“Look
, it’s different with you. I don’t just want your blood, I want…” He stopped himself and turned away. “Let us leave this conversation for another time. Now is not the time for it to take place.”
I nodded not wanting to argue with him. “I’ll never be afraid of you,” I murmured, laying my head on his chest once more.
“What am I going to do with you?” He shook his head and lay back so we could watch the end of the movie, but I could tell he was unsettled by our conversation. His hand moved gently up and down my back, and my belly did flip-flops at his touch. I looked up, met his heated gaze, and he lowered his head to mine. Our lips met, and I sighed as his mouth moved against mine in a kiss that seared my soul and branded my heart.
The door flew open suddenly admitting my father, who stared at us with a look of unadulterated rage. “Aidan,” he growled. “Can I talk to you in the hall?”
Aidan untangled himself from me and began to rise, but I grabbed his hand, stopping him from leaving. “Dad, what’s wrong?”
“Sweetheart, don’t worry yourself with this. I just need to get a few things straight with Aidan.” His fist was tight at his side, and he looked sharply at our joined hands with disapproval, but I realized he was concerned more about exactly what had been happening before he entered the room. Vampires had excellent hearing and he had probably heard everything that had transpired between us.
“We were just watching a movie. It’s not like I would be capable of much else,” I told him angrily.
“Don’t involve yourself with this. I will talk to your father as he wishes,” Aidan said next to me.
“I’m not a child! He can talk in front of me,” I argued.
My father turned to Aidan with an accusing stare as if he were somehow responsible for my sudden stubborn streak. “I was going to leave her out of this, but since she is aware of the problem then we can discuss it together. It is probably better she knows what is going on, anyway.” He turned and looked at me pointedly. “I do not like what I see going on between the two of you. You are too dependent on him. I know it’s hard for you both, but I feel it’s best for Aidan to leave again, at least until your birthday. When you’re eighteen you can do as you want, but, for now, this is for the best. It will give you time to think about what you’d be giving up and what a relationship with him will entail.”
“What!” I screamed. “Are you crazy? You’re losing it because we watched a movie together?”
“No, that’s not it at all; this is just a symptom of something larger. It’s too complicated to go into, but as long as Aidan is here, you will not take that time to consider what you want out of life.”
Aidan stood by my side, his face hard, revealing nothing of what he was feeling.
“Say something, tell him you won’t leave! He can’t tell you what to do, you’re his prince!” I shouted, horrified that again he was being asked to leave my side when all I wanted was for him to stay.
My mother came through the door, her face tight, wringing her hands with worry. “Duncan, maybe now is not the best time for this conversation.”
He snarled and turned to face her. “When is the right time? When he changes her by mistake? How about when she is a hundred years old and she hates us all, because she made this choice when she was far too young to know what was best for her? Once he makes her a vampire it can’t be taken back: it’s final.”
I glanced at Aidan and could tell Dad’s words were getting to him. His silence was very telling and the death grip he had on my hand worried me. “None of that is true, Aidan. You have never pushed me to become a vampire, or even asked that of me. Please do not leave me again,” I pleaded desperately, but my pleas fell on deaf ears.
“Your dad is right, I have been selfish,” he said softly, his voice void of emotion. “I have very competent guards in place to protect you and, for now, you will be at home twenty-four hours a day. You will be safe. It will be better this way. Take your time, recover, and enjoy this year with your friends. If you still want this, us, I will be back when your next birthday comes.”
“No!” Tears ran furiously down my cheeks as I pleaded unashamedly. “Don’t go!”
He leaned down and placed a chaste kiss on my lips. “Please, don’t make this harder than it has to be,” he whispered.
I knew his mind was made up and looked to my dad to plead with him instead. “Don’t do this, don’t make him go. We won’t spend time alone anymore. When I am better, I will spend time with my friends and really think about what I want, I promise. Please just let him stay!”
His face hardened, like it always did when he wasn’t going to give me my way. “I’m sorry, honey, but I think this is what is best for you right now.”
“It’s not! I love him, Dad. Don’t you understand that!,” I screamed. He refused to look at me, and I knew he wasn’t going to be changing his mind.
Aidan took my hand in his and tried to calm me. “Katie, do not blame your father: he’s trying to help you.”
“Help me? He’s ruining my life,” I argued.
“Stop,” Aidan said, his voice cracking with emotion. “Your father loves you and would defy me, his prince, for your happiness. That says a lot about how much he loves you.”
I looked at my father, the only person I could blame, and let loose my anger. “I won’t forgive you for this. If Aidan leaves, I won’t forgive you: Do you understand that?” He met my gaze with his own tortured one and nodded sadly. I looked to my mother, who held his hand in silent support, seeing the shame she felt for my words in her eyes.
“Can I have a moment to say goodbye?” Aidan asked.
“Of course,” my mother said, tugging my father out of the door behind her.
I gripped Aidan’s hand, unwilling to let him go, unable to stand the idea of being without him once again. “Don’t go.”
“Katie, your father has loved you as his own child from the day they rescued you. You are his life; he would do anything for you. Forgive him for wanting the best for you.” I did not answer, and he put his hand under my chin, lifting it so I was staring into his eyes.
“I will be back. Take this time to understand what you will be committing to. Once you make the decision to be with me, I will never be able to let you go. I have been selfish, using your injuries as an excuse to stay. Now I must give you up for awhile, but know that never a moment will pass that I won’t think of you and wish we could be together.” His lips brushed mine softly, as if he was afraid to hurt me, and I pulled him closer, kissing him the way I wanted to be kissed.
He pulled back, shocked by the intensity of my kiss. “Please, for me, stay out of trouble,” he said, brushing my cheek with the back of his hand. He stared deeply into my eyes, capturing me with his powerful gaze. “Go out with your friends: Have fun, date, and live,” he commanded.
Inwardly, I screamed as I felt his compulsion seeping into my mind, but physically I remained silent, unable to break away from his hold.
“Goodbye, my Amado Uno.” He kissed my cheek then walked out, and I was left alone. Angry, confused, and dazed by the events that had just unfolded before me.
Despite the deep sadness I felt at his leaving, though, I did not cry. In fact, I just sat in my room, wondering how I was going to fill the empty hole in my heart Aidan’s leaving had left. Sure, he had compelled me to date, but he hadn’t compelled me to forget about him, something I wasn’t sure he could do, even if he tried. My heart just wouldn’t allow it.
Chapter Eighteen
After Aidan’s leaving, I sat in my room, inconsolable and angry with the world. My mother brought meals, always looking hopeful I might try a bite, but I refused to eat. Paul and Beth came to visit me often, and I listened to them talk but did not bother to respond.
Almost a week passed before my father finally made an appearance, his haggard appearance a sign he, too, had been affected by our argument. “You need to eat,” he admonished. I ignored him, but he went on. “You can be mad at me. Blame me for making Aidan
leave. I can live with that, but you have to take care of yourself. He would want that.”
I couldn’t look at him. I loved him, and I could not trust myself not to say the hateful things I was thinking. Things I would never be able to take back once given voice to. He made Aidan leave. He was the reason I was so miserable, and I refused to acknowledge him.
“I’ll check in with you later,” he said tiredly, leaving the room with his head down and his shoulders slumped.
The only highlights of my days were Jess’s visits. She came every afternoon, sometimes with Josh, sometimes without, but always I was glad to see her. We would watch movies, and she would help me catch up on the work I was missing in class while filling me in on the gossip I was missing at school. Often Chris too would join us, and lighten my mood, but I couldn’t talk to either of them about Aidan, and it was silently eating me up inside.
The weeks of my recovery passed slowly. More often than not, I thought about Aidan and what he was doing. With every waking second that passed without him, my anger at my father grew and the loss I felt became harder to deal with. I went through my days like a zombie, eating enough to survive and paying just enough attention to what was going on around me that no one complained, but the light had gone out of my life. I simply existed, waiting for the time I could be reunited with the one I loved once again.
*****
After weeks of being homebound, the doctor finally deemed me ready to go back to school. The first morning was rough. I had not sleep well the night before and had to take a pain pill because my leg was hurting, so I woke up late. Getting dressed with a thigh-high leg cast was a nightmare, even with Beth and my mother’s help, and I found myself drained before I even left my room. My brother was running around like a chicken with its head cut off making sure security was in place for my first day back at school, making everyone antsy. And I had yet to speak to my father, which made breakfast an extremely uncomfortable affair.