Grim Expectations (Aisling Grimlock Book 5)

by Amanda M. Lee

  I forced a smile for her benefit as I approached, removing my coat and taking a moment to look her up and down before sitting. She looked exhausted and tired. I wasn’t really taken aback by the realization. If I were in her shoes I would probably look worse. “I’ve never been here before,” I said. “Is the food good?”

  “It’s very good,” Barbara replied, nervously playing with the empty straw wrapper on the table. “I wasn’t sure you’d come.”

  That made two of us. “I was surprised when I saw the text and I stared at it for a few minutes before responding,” I admitted, grabbing a menu from the stand at the end of the booth. “I was driving myself crazy with the idea someone was watching me, so it seemed a nice distraction.”

  Barbara widened her eyes. “Someone was watching you?”

  “I think I made it up in my head.”

  “But … do you know that?”

  “No,” I replied, opting for honesty. “It’s been a busy week. From what I can tell, if anyone wanted to hurt me they would just come at me. That seems to be my lot in life.”

  “Yes, you’ve definitely had a rough few months,” Barbara mused, her eyes traveling to my arm. The bandage was new because Griffin insisted on switching it out after our morning shower. Whatever my father gave me the other night worked to make me feel better and heal the wound much quicker than expected. “How is your family?”

  I knew what she was really asking but decided to play the game anyway. “We’re okay,” I answered. “Aidan and Jerry officially moved in together. Griffin and I did the same. Everyone else is pretty normal. That means Braden is a butthead, Cillian is caught up with Maya and research, and Redmond is steady.”

  Barbara chuckled. “Yes, you all play specific parts in the family dynamic,” she said. “It’s … delightful.”

  “I’ve never heard our family described that way,” I said.

  “And yet that doesn’t make you guys any less delightful.”

  I pressed my lips together as I regarded the sad-looking woman. “Why don’t you get to the part where you ask about Dad?” I suggested. “I know that’s who you really want to talk about.”

  “That’s not true,” Barbara protested, although she couldn’t muster much conviction. “I have been worried about him, though. How is he?”

  “He seems okay,” I answered. I saw no sense lying to the woman. “We have a lot going on and he probably doesn’t have time to focus on his personal stuff when we have gargoyles attacking and everyone switching homes.” I left out the part about him taking Serena into Grimlock Manor. I was pretty sure my father wouldn’t mind Barbara knowing about it, but it was his job to tell her if he chose to do so. “Our family is always mired in drama, so if it’s not one thing it’s another.”

  “I guess that’s true,” Barbara said, smiling as the waitress approached and set a glass of water in front of me before taking my order.

  I went with a simple burrito dinner and soda – even though I would’ve preferred alcohol to make the meal more comfortable – and remained quiet until I was sure the waitress was out of earshot before continuing. “I think my father likes you, but he hasn’t mentioned what happened between the two of you. We asked and he basically told us it was none of our business.”

  “If you’re looking for juicy details, I really don’t have any to give you,” Barbara said. “I like your father, too. In fact, I’ve had a crush on him for a very long time. He always seemed so sad and aloof, though. He was hard to approach.

  “I spent years getting to know him and I flirted to the best of my ability, which probably wasn’t much,” she continued. “When he finally asked me out I was so … happy. That didn’t last long, though.”

  “Yes, well, when you find out your boyfriend’s wife is back from the dead, that would throw a wrench in anyone’s dating plans,” I said. “For the record, you handled all of that better than I would have. You were calm and collected. I never do either of those things well.”

  Barbara giggled. “I think you say self-deprecating things because you think it puts people at ease, but it’s not always necessary,” she said. “You’re a good girl and your father loves you. You’re amusing and loyal … and you’re adorable with Griffin. I enjoyed watching you interact with your entire family.”

  “You keep talking about spending time with us in the past tense,” I pointed out. “Are you done with my dad?”

  “I am … taking a step back,” Barbara replied, choosing her words carefully. “Even before we started dating, Aisling, I knew I was more invested in the relationship than your father. That’s not a ‘poor me’ thing. It’s just realistic.

  “I thought that once he had a chance to relax and get to know me he might change his mind and actually care,” she continued. “Living in your mother’s shadow when she was dead wasn’t easy. I was resolved to do it, though. Living in her shadow now that she’s alive is impossible.”

  In a weird way, that made sense. “For a long time, the idea of my father dating never even entered my head,” I admitted. “I mean … I knew he was lonely. I thought he would die lonely, though. I didn’t think he could get over my mother’s death. I wasn’t sure any of us could.

  “Griffin helped me realize that we’d accepted it but would never really move on,” I continued. “I was ready to let the memories go, but then … well … she came back.”

  “And your family is whole again,” Barbara said, her eyes glassy. “Does that make you happy?”

  “In theory, it should make me happy,” I answered. “But it doesn’t. I’m under no illusions that what came back is the mother I remember. I think for me, the problem is that I see flashes of her. She’ll make a face or roll her eyes and remind me of a time when I was younger, and my mind gets muddled.”

  “I think that’s only natural.”

  “In this business, though, we can’t afford to make mistakes,” I said. “I’m pretty sure she’s behind at least one of the attempts on my life in the past few months. She can make excuses and lie to mold the facts to fit her case, but I know she’s not telling the truth.

  “She may look like my mother sometimes, but she can’t be trusted,” I said. “If I turn my back to her, I fully expect her to put a knife in it. She might not even be able to control the urges, for all I know.”

  “I don’t know what words I can offer to make you feel better,” Barbara said, her eyes somber. “You’re in the worst position of all. Well, you and your father.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You’re the only daughter, Aisling,” Barbara replied. “For better or worse, you had a special bond with your mother that your other siblings couldn’t claim. Even though she loved you all, you were the only girl. She had four sons and might’ve played favorites here and there, but you stood alone.

  “As for your father, Lily was the love of his life,” she continued. “One of the things I like best about him is his loyalty. He’s loyal to all of you … and Jerry … and even Griffin. Your mother’s return is tearing him apart.”

  Hearing insight from someone who spent time watching our family even though she was never really an insider was interesting. “How so? He’s still my dad to me. I can’t see it. Sometimes I think I feel it, though.”

  “Your father is plagued by the fact that he has five children and he loves each and every one of you in the best way he can,” Barbara said. “He knows how to read all of you. He knows when you’re lying. He knows when you need space and also when you need to be pushed into doing something you’re not ready to do.

  “That man would die for all of you,” she continued. “He also loved his wife. He would’ve gladly traded his life to save her that night. Her return means that … he has a lot on his mind.”

  That was something of a wimpy copout. “My father will always choose us over her.”

  “He will,” Barbara agreed, nodding. “What if he doesn’t have to, though? What if your mother is here and she really does want to put your family back together?
”

  “Do you think that’s possible?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Well, I’m pretty darned sure it’s not possible,” I said. “My mother died in that fire. Part of her was resurrected, but it wasn’t the best part. The best part was kind and loving and never had an agenda.

  “She read us books and let us fight our own battles until she felt it was necessary to step in and stop the bloodshed,” I continued. “She instinctively loved and protected us. That thing that came back instinctively loves and protects herself. We’re afterthoughts … or pawns on a chessboard she’s desperate to move around so she can sacrifice us to take someone else’s king at some point.”

  “And yet you still find yourself drawn to her, don’t you?”

  It was a hard question to answer. “I guess in some ways I do,” I conceded. “In other ways I feel forced to let her remain close because I know some of my brothers can’t push her away and I’m fearful she’ll hurt them if I don’t watch them closely.”

  “What’s funny to me is that before your mother returned you weren’t a maternal figure in your brothers’ lives,” Barbara said. “Now that she’s back, you’re forced to watch out for the people who’ve spent their entire lives protecting you.

  “Redmond is the oldest and he’s understandably wary, but he’s the child who spent the most time with Lily so he struggles,” she continued. “Cillian is the most pragmatic and for some reason it’s easiest for him to take a step back. Aidan loves your mother and father, but you’re the closest family member he has because you’re twins. No matter how angry he gets he’ll always take your side.”

  “That leaves Braden,” I said. “In a fight, he’ll side with her.”

  “Are you sure?”

  Was I? “I guess I’m not,” I said after a few moments of contemplation. “Braden has always been loyal, even when he’s at his douchiest. He’s the one I’m most worried about. Well, him and Griffin.”

  Barbara’s eyebrows flew up her forehead. “Griffin?”

  “My mother hates him,” I gritted out. It felt good to be able to talk freely to someone without worrying about hiding what I was feeling because it might get back to Griffin. “I see it every time she looks at him. She wants him out of my life.”

  “Do you think she’d hurt him?”

  “I think she’s capable of almost anything,” I said. “I won’t let her hurt Griffin, though. He’s far too important to me.”

  “He’s your soul mate,” Barbara intoned.

  “I … don’t know if I believe in that,” I hedged. “I know I love him more than anything, but do you really believe two souls connect and that no one else will ever fit that person but you?”

  “Yes.” Barbara answered without hesitation. “I believe you and Griffin are soul mates. I also believe your father and Lily were soul mates. That’s why I’ve opted to step back. If you have a shot at a happy family – if your father has a chance to get everything he’s ever wanted – I don’t want to stand in the way.”

  Her answer stunned me. “You broke up with him?” I was certain things had been the other way around.

  “I took a step back,” Barbara clarified. “He needs time to examine this situation and see it for what it really is. He can’t do that if he’s going out of his way trying to make me comfortable. It’s not fair to him, and it’s not fair to you guys. That’s why I’m giving your family time and space.”

  For some reason the admission made me like her more. “I’m sorry we didn’t give you much of a chance,” I offered. “We’re kind of jerks and self-involved. When he brought you home … .”

  “You all reacted better than he expected,” Barbara supplied. “He had me ready for Armageddon.”

  “We kind of did that the night before we had dinner with you,” I said, referring to a drunken gossip session that was full of complaints and worry. “Still, we weren’t very warm to you because we had so much of our own crap going on. I’m sorry about that.”

  “Now you’re talking about me as if I’m in the past tense,” Barbara said, smiling. “Nothing has been decided yet, Aisling. I refuse to stand in the way of a happy family reunion if it’s a possibility, though. For now … I’m waiting. I honestly hope you get everything you’ve ever wanted. You’ve earned it.”

  “I haven’t earned anything yet,” I said. “I do hope I get what I want, though. I hope you get what you want, too.”

  “That would be nice,” Barbara said.

  I blew out a heavy sigh and glanced around the restaurant. Having lunch with my father’s ex-girlfriend was rough. “So … do you want to get margaritas?”

  Barbara giggled. “That sounds like a plan.”

  I MANAGED to stop after one margarita, but it was a large one so I took twenty minutes to walk around the block before getting in my car. It gave me time to reflect on my conversation with Barbara – and whether or not I wanted to tell my father about it. I wasn’t certain I should, but I was also uncertain about whether I’d be able to keep my mouth shut. History seemed to indicate that wasn’t a possibility.

  I was just about back to the main road when something caught my eye on the brick fence at one of the corners.

  Eternal Sunshine Cemetery is as old as the city of Detroit. All of the plots were taken or reserved, and the only burials going on behind the walls are due to older families. Because Detroit has been a paranormal mecca for years, pagan symbols found their way onto almost everything – especially if you knew where to look.

  The symbol I saw now on the fence was baffling, though. I recognized it … and from something recent. It took a moment for things to click into place, and when they did I was excited. I took a photograph of the symbol with my phone and then hurried toward my car.

  I was pretty sure I’d just uncovered something to help Cillian, and I couldn’t wait to tell him. Okay, I really wanted to crow and point out I was the smartest one in the family, but both outcomes had their merit.

  It was time to get some answers instead of just adding new questions. It was time to seek out our enemy instead of waiting for it to attack us.

  21

  Twenty-One

  “Are you sure?” Redmond didn’t look convinced as he studied the symbol on the cemetery’s fence.

  I had texted the photo of the symbol to Cillian. He got very excited. Instead of rushing to me, though, he insisted on conducting more research. Ten minutes later, Redmond showed up. He wasn’t nearly as excited about the discovery.

  “I’m not stupid,” I said. “I know what an eye and a little pyramid-thingy looks like.”

  Redmond made a face. “A little pyramid-thingy?”

  “Hey, I said I recognized it,” I argued. “I didn’t say I knew what it was. That’s Cillian’s job. He’s the smart one.”

  Redmond snorted as he dragged a hand through his hair. “I’ll have you know that I’m a genius, kid. I’m the smartest one in the family.”

  “Your brain is like a bag of rocks compared to Cillian’s mind,” I countered. “Just admit it. You’ll feel better when you do. I admitted it a long time ago.”

  “You admitted what?”

  I cringed when I heard Griffin’s voice, turning to find him standing on the corner staring at Redmond and me. He didn’t look happy. I decided to fix that situation before it could spiral out of control. “Hi, honey. You look really hot today.”

  “Nice try,” Griffin muttered, moving closer to us. “You’re still in trouble.”

  I balked. “What did I do? I was being good.”

  “You didn’t call me when you decided to go investigating,” Griffin replied, not missing a beat. “You promised me you were going to be careful.”

  “How is this being anything other than careful?” I challenged. His attitude was beginning to chafe. “I happened to stumble by this wall and see the symbol from that seal and I texted it to Cillian because I knew he’d want to see it. That’s the definition of being careful, if you ask me.”

  “Y
es, but you didn’t call me,” Griffin said. “You called your brother even though you knew you were going to wander into this cemetery.”

  “We haven’t made that decision yet.”

  Griffin arched a mocking eyebrow. “Really? Do you expect me to believe that? I know you. The only reason you’re not in there already is because you were waiting for your brothers.”

  Crud! I hate it that he knows me so well sometimes. “See, here’s the thing … .”

  Griffin pressed his fingers to my lips and squeezed them shut. “No, there’s no thing today,” he said. “You should’ve called me. This cemetery is in my jurisdiction. There’s no reason I can’t be with you when you explore.”

  He had a point. I did, too, though. “You’re supposed to be working,” I said. “If you expect to afford that fancy new townhouse we just got, you have to bring in a steady paycheck. I’m not going to carry you if you get fired. I don’t care how hot you are.”

  Redmond barked out a laugh and shook his head as he regarded us. “You guys are a trip. Do you fight just to ramp up the heat factor and then rip each other’s clothes off?”

  Now it was my turn to make a face. “You’re gross. You don’t need to know that about your sister.”

  “That wasn’t a denial,” Redmond said.

  “Maybe I simply like the way she fights,” Griffin volunteered. “Have you ever considered that?”

  “Hey, you’re lucky to be alive, because since I know you do disgusting things with my baby sister,” Redmond said. “You probably shouldn’t push your luck.”

  Griffin’s eyes shifted from my brother to me. “I’m going to push your luck if you’re not careful, Aisling. You promised me you’d be careful. It’s been like … five hours … and you’re already not being careful.”

  That was a vicious lie – er, at least an annoying observation. “I was being very careful,” I said. “I had a big margarita at lunch and limited myself to one because the alcohol content seemed high. Then, instead of driving, I walked around the block to make sure my head was clear. What’s more careful than that?”