by K E Osborn
I look at Luc wondering how he could go from such an innocent boy to this monster right here in front of me. This cocky, upstart shithead who wants to kill me.
Bex was right.
Maybe I should have let sleeping dogs lie. But now I have him, I will have to work extra hard to turn him. To show him how good life can be without the Sovereigns.
My neck hurts like a motherfucker. The shithead got me good, but I can’t help but wish Bex will be waiting for me at the clubhouse when I get there. But I’m pretty sure, at this point, even if they called her, she wouldn’t come.
The trip doesn’t take too long. I watch Luc the entire way wondering how it got to this. How he got this way. But then I remember he’s spent a further nineteen years with those fuckers. They changed him. They tormented him. They tortured him. But above all, they made him one of them.
It makes my stomach churn as the van pulls to a stop then the back opens. Ace stands there looking me over. “Good, you’re still alive.”
I glare at him. “Is that meant to be funny?”
“No. I honestly didn’t know if you were going to bleed out or not. I just didn’t want to freak you the fuck out. Now, get down and go inside. I have to look at your neck properly.”
My muscles are tense as I glance back at Luc. “And what about Luc?”
Torque rounds the back of the van. “We’ll take care of him. Don’t worry.”
I slide out the back of the van leaving my original brother behind. I glance back at the out-cold body with a heavy sigh, then turn to walk with Ace inside the clubhouse to get patched up. I can’t help but feel the flood of disappointment overwhelming me that Bex isn’t here.
I knew she wouldn’t be, but it still stings she isn’t.
BEX
I’m fucking pissed off as I drive like a mad woman to where I need to go. My fingers tight on the steering wheel as I mutter under my breath. The fucking idiot playing on my mind as he always does only making this trip even more tumultuous. Chains is like a pain in your side that’s so annoying, it’s aggravating and keeps persisting, but the problem is the fucking pain moves from time to time from your side to your damn heart where you can’t help but welcome the misery.
Bastard.
“They’re a good group of guys, Bex, just meet some of them, and you’ll understand,” Ty begged as I patched him up once again. I was into my second year of pre-med, so I didn’t really know how to do things properly. But over the last five years with Ty, I’d had to learn pretty quickly how to patch him up. He was accident prone. Or liked the pain. I wasn’t sure which one just yet.
I scrunched up my face with a huff. “Ty, I don’t get it. Why would you want to leave the house and live with a bunch of bikers?” I felt like he wasn’t just leaving Mom and Dad, but he was deserting me.
We were close, so damn close.
He was a part of my life.
And now he was going to just leave?
He turned to me, grabbing my hands, his ice blue eyes piercing mine. His stare drilling into me like he’d done a billion times before. We’d been on this path since he’d arrived, getting so close, knowing that our bond is more than either of us wanted to admit. My feelings for him ran deep to my core, so deep that it shattered my very existence to know he wanted to leave.
“Bex, you mean everything to me, every-fucking-thing. Abi and Will, too. If my past ever comes back to haunt me, I want to know I have people on my side who will fight to protect us all.”
My heart beat a little faster. I was the only person he told about the Sovereigns. He made me swear not to tell anyone. And it’s a promise I’d never broken. I regretted it every day, but my loyalty to Ty meant everything to me.
I took a deep breath as I thought about it for a moment. He was going to do it whether I agreed or not. I thought I only had one option and that was to go with it, so I took it. “Well, Ty, if you’re in, I’m in. I need to know that you’re safe. I’m training to be a doctor because of you. If you’re joining a club to keep us safe, then I’m being a part of this biker club to keep you safe.”
His eyes widened as he shook his head. “What? No way. That’s not what I—”
“Non-negotiable, Ty. If you’re in, I’m in. I might not be qualified, hell, I might not be very good right now, but I’m going to be the club’s doctor… if they’ll have me.”
His face lit up, his hand swooping to cup my face. Heat flooded through me at his emotional touch. We were twenty-one. We weren’t supposed to be touching each other this way, but he leaned forward and pressed his forehead to mine as we both closed our eyes and just smiled.
“Thank you. I couldn’t imagine this new part of my life without you in it.”
I leaned forward wrapping myself around him. He felt safe. He felt warm. It felt like I was always meant to be in his arms. I knew the feeling was wrong, but I stayed there anyway as I nuzzled into him a little more.
“I wouldn’t ever let you do anything alone, Ty. It’s you and me. Always.”
I let out a loud huff as I pull into the parking space turning off the car. Shaking my head as anger swarms inside of me, I open the door sliding out and slamming my door shut.
“Good to see you again, Kline,” Gatekeeper calls out from his post. I glance up as I walk to the trunk of my car, tipping my chin at him.
“Hey, I’m coming to check on your burns after I’ve finished with the dickhead inside.”
“Sure thing. He’s pretty shaken up, though. Heard he went into shock when the guy slashed at his throat.”
A shudder washes over my spine as I clench my eyes shut trying to fight the urge to cry? To punch something? I don’t fucking know what I’m feeling. All I know is Chains went to find Luc. It went balls up, just like I told him it fucking would. Just like fucking always, he got in the way and managed to get himself hurt. It’s as if he enjoys the punishment or some shit. I swear he loves pain, the twisted fuck.
“You okay, doc?” Gatekeeper calls out bringing me back into the now.
I open my eyes looking back at him. “Yeah, thanks. I’ll go easy on him.”
I won’t go easy on him.
I lift the trunk grabbing my first-aid kit, shut the trunk, then walk to the opening of the clubroom. I can hear the chatter from out here. Brothers all talking as I walk inside. I notice Chains in the middle of the room sitting on a stool with Ace trying to do something to his neck. I grunt as I storm up to them, shoving Ace out the way before he scars Chains too bad.
“Stop fucking about, and let me get to work.” My anger getting a hold of me. I don’t look down to Chains, but I feel his eyes on me as I take in the clear slice in his neck. “Jesus fucking Christ, Ty, another half inch to the left, and you’d be fucking dead.” I can’t help myself as I slap the back of his head for good measure. He groans out in pain, instantly making me regret my actions as his hand slides up my thigh to rest on my hip. I tense, still not looking at his face, but my body ignites at him touching me in such a way. I can’t help but notice his brothers starting to wander off giving us some space and time together. My stomach knots as I open my bag pulling out some antiseptic to clean the wound.
“I didn’t think you were coming.” His voice is hoarse, like he’s unsure of how to talk to me.
I grit my teeth as I take a breath pouring the antiseptic on some gauze. “This is gonna sting,” I reply curtly.
“Bex—”
I swipe his wound making him jerk as he groans out in pain. His hand on my hip gripping tighter, fingers digging into my flesh, my breath leaving my body as I halt my movements on him.
“Jesus, woman, anyone would think you’re purposely trying to hurt me,” he teases.
I finally look at his face. His eyes are red from not enough sleep, the purple bags under them give him away. The sight makes my lip quiver.
He looks tired.
So damn tired.
But the way the sparkle lights his tired eyes as he looks at me makes me feel like I’m still the be
st thing in his world. Even though I’m treating him like shit. Even though Luc is back, in here somewhere, Chains is still looking at me like I’m his number one. It’s only now I realize maybe I didn’t want Chains to find Luc because I was jealous. Luc was his world before me. I’ve only had Chains for three years longer than the time Luc had him for. I guess I thought if he got Luc back, he wouldn’t need me anymore. Even with all this confusion surrounding us, even with this weird chemistry between us, he’s my best friend. I need him more than he knows.
A weird noise escapes me as I lean down wrapping my arms around him. He groans as I sit on his lap, straddling him, my face falling into the good side of his neck. I need to feel him right now. He’s stiff for a moment like he’s surprised I jumped all over him, but he’s quickly wrapping his arms around me, holding me tightly to him. His hands sliding up my back to keep me in position.
“Bex, I’m okay,” he whispers. I don’t miss the way his nose nuzzles into my hair. I sit on his lap for a moment just letting him hold me. I should be comforting him, but for some reason, he’s the one doing the comforting right now.
I don’t know how long we’ve been sitting like this, so I sniffle, pulling back as I look into his eyes. He’s staring back at me in awe as we gaze at each other while something passes between us. Things being said in just a look that shouldn’t be said. He’s my family, but this goes beyond those bounds.
Sitting on his lap, I glance at my arm to see his blood now lining it in streaks, my eyes widen as I gasp. “Shit, your neck!” I stand abruptly shaking my head as I grit my teeth. “I’m sorry, I got caught up in the moment, and—”
“Bex, it’s okay. My neck’s fine—”
“It’s not fine, you idiot. You have a gaping wound near your carotid artery.” I grab my suture kit to start preparing it.
His hand slides back into place on my hip. I clear my throat as I try to figure out if I’m angry about his hand on me, or if it sets me on fire, and I don’t want him to ever let go. The mixed emotions play havoc in my brain as I shake them off continuing with the task at hand.
“I trust you... I know you’ll fix me.”
My eyes wander back to his, there’s so much meaning in those last five words. Does he mean his neck or all together? He manages to weakly smile which shifts the pain from my side to the pain in my heart.
Welcome back misery.
Swallowing hard, I turn away moving to suturing his neck. “So, Luc is here?” I ask trying to focus on the problem at hand and not his hand on me and the fire burning inside.
His head bobs up and down.
I grit my teeth. “Stop moving, idiot.”
“Sorry, doc.”
I finally relax a little as I grab the thread and needle driver, moving to his neck to begin the process. “You ready?” I ask.
His hand tightens on my hip. I’m not using anesthetic. For some reason, these fucking biker idiots like to think they’re tough refusing it every damn time, so I don’t even ask.
He tilts his head slightly, so I know he’s good to go. I move in piercing the skin, he doesn’t flinch even though I’m threading a needle through his skin and tissue with no pain relief. He really is a sucker for punishment. I don’t know how many sutures I’ve put in his body over the years. Not just since he’s been in the club, but ever since I’ve known how to do them. Before I could, we were taking him to the doctor countless times. He was always getting hurt in one way or another.
He seems to thrive on the pain.
I don’t know why.
I could never understand his appetite for it.
Was it just he was accident prone or some form of self-punishment? Either way, Chains needs to stop this because one day he’s going to get hurt too badly for me to fix. Yes, he’s the reason I became a doctor in the first place, so I could always fix him, though I don’t want to have to be the one to pronounce him dead.
I don’t think I could ever handle that.
Even if he is a pain in my side.
“There. All done. But, Chains… you need to stop getting in the way of bullets and blades. I mean one day one of them is really going to hurt you.” I look at him again as I take a step back.
He sighs as his hand falls away from my hip, and he huffs like he understands. “I know,” is all he says.
“I mean it, Ty!”
“I know,” he repeats.
I glare at him. I need to get away from him right now, so I slam my kit lid shut and move to walk off.
“Where are you going?” he calls out.
“To wash your fucking blood off me,” I yell back at him not caring as everyone watches me while I walk into the hall to find a bathroom. I don’t know whose I’m going to use, but I will find an open door and go in there. Luckily the hall is empty, so I don’t have to worry about random brothers yelling at me for going into someone’s room without permission. I see an open door, so I walk to it and straight in. The room’s clean. I notice all the Iron Man posters and figurines as I storm in. I make my way to the bathroom to wash off Chains’ blood when I hear pounding footsteps behind me. I turn around to see Chains rushing into the room, something brewing in his eyes—a storm. I just don’t know whether it’s out of anger or something else, something much more dangerous.
He walks up to me as I back up, my butt connects with a cupboard making the little figurines shake when I hit it. Chains steps right up to me then stops looking me dead in the eyes. “Bex, I don’t understand why you’re so angry with me, when you knew this was going to happen?”
I huff. “Are you joking? You can’t see why I’m angry?”
“I told you one day I was going to go back to get Luc. So, when that day came, you gave up on me,” he spits. It hits right where it was meant to.
I shove his chest, but he doesn’t budge making me grunt in annoyance. “You damn idiot! He wouldn’t do it for you.”
His eyes harden. “He’s my brother!”
I throw my hands in the air in frustration. “And you’re mine!”
He moves in, placing his hands either side of me on the cupboard knocking off a couple of figurines, trapping me in the process. I feel like I can’t breathe.
“I do anything to protect those I care about.” His voice is softer, calmer as his eyes bore into mine. He’s so close I can smell the antiseptic from his wound, it’s making me woozy. Or is it the fact he’s so close if I moved just a fraction, we’d be kissing right now? This feels so strange. Everything in me screams for him to back away, but at the same time all I want to do is reach out, pulling him to me. He looks so damn good, his ice blue eyes staring back at me like he’s struggling to hold himself together. Like this eats him up just as much as it is me. He inches closer, it feels like electricity is pulsing between us, my breathing’s becoming rapid and shallow as I lick my lips.
I want him to kiss me.
It’s so fucking wrong as my stomach swirls with butterflies at the goddamned thought of kissing him again. My hand comes up, caressing his bicep, sliding up the good side of his neck to his cheek. We’re panting, neither of us making the move, too fucking scared of what it will mean if we do.
My heart leaps out of my chest as he shifts forward. His lips move closer to mine, they almost touch, the hairs of his beard tickle my face as I brace myself for the wanted kiss as I close my eyes. Our lips barely touch sending a shockwave through me when footsteps startle me.
“Who the… oh shit, sorry. Well ah… this is… ah, my room,” Ace blurts out in quick succession as Chains pulls back so dramatically I stumble slightly making even more of Ace’s figurines fall from the cupboard.
I gasp as Chains looks from Ace to me and back to Ace who’s shaking his head, then turns, racing out the room leaving me feeling like I have no idea what the fuck just happened.
“Why do my figurines always end up coming off second best?” Ace murmurs walking up to me, then bobbing down picking them up as I stand too shocked to move.
Ace stands up, his arms ful
l of bobbleheads as he looks at me. “Hey, I’m sorry I interrupted. It looked like that was an intense moment.”
My eyes feel heavy as I stare at him not really knowing what to say. So, I blurt out the first thing in my head. “He’s my brother.”
Ace winces empathetically placing the figurines on the cupboard, then wraps his arm around my shoulders. “Not really. The one thing I learned a long time ago is you can’t help who you love. But trust me, it’s much better to fall for someone you can actually be with than someone who’s with another man happily living their life with kids and…” He shakes his head. “Anyway, you get my point.”
I glance at him furrowing my brow. “Wait, you love someone?” I ask.
“This isn’t about me, Kline. Plus, I loved someone. I’m over it. She’s happy. I adore seeing her content. We’re good friends now, and that’s all I want for her. I’ll find my girl, someone to make me smile like she did.”
I raise my brow. “I feel like I know this woman you speak of.”
He huffs out a laugh. “You do, but it’s not common knowledge I fell for her. I told a little white lie to make everyone happy. It is how it’s meant to be.”
My eyes open wide. “Shit! It’s Sparx.”
His happy demeanor falls like he knows I caught him out. He and Sparx got close when she first came to the club from the Notorious Knights for protection, but her history with Trax was always going to win out over anything new. “I won’t say anything. I know better than to cause shit between brothers, but, Ace, it was good of you to step aside so she and Trax could be happy.”
“I wasn’t right for her, I knew it. I’m better as a friend which is what I am. I’m over it now, have been for a while, but sometimes it’s hard, you know? But you never know what might happen for me in the future.” I lean out wrapping my arms around him in an embrace. He hugs me back. “This falls under doctor-patient confidentiality, right?”
My eyes soften. “Of course, thank you. By the way, I know what you’re doing.”
He shrugs it off. “What would that be, doc?”