by P J Gordon
After she was clean and dressed, Manda ventured out of the bedroom. Beyond her door was a loft that overlooked an expansive great room, one wall of which was dominated by a stone fireplace. The adjacent wall featured a series of huge windows that stretched two stories and framed a view of the nearby mountain range. Kastl’s ‘cabin’ was a palatial log home perched on the side of a mountain, overlooking a forested valley. If this was where he wanted her to hide, at least her prison would have been a comfortable one.
Manda wandered down the curving stairs at one side of the loft and explored until she found Kastl in the large kitchen. He was pouring himself a cup of coffee.
“Did you have a nice shower?” he asked politely.
“Yes, it was fine.” Manda sat down on a stool at the kitchen island.
“You have more questions,” he surmised, sipping his coffee.
“No. I’ve already made my decision. I won’t let everyone think I’m dead just to keep myself safe. That’s cruel.” Manda’s hands were clenched tightly in her lap.
“I see,” Kastl replied calmly. “And you think it will be much easier on them all when you really are dead. Yes. That’ll be much better, because at least then you won’t have to feel guilty about it. Better for you to be dead with a clear conscience than to suffer through a couple of years of emotional discomfort and then have a nice ‘happily ever after’ for everyone involved.” He took another sip of coffee and met her eyes accusingly over the rim of the cup.
“It doesn’t have to be like that. I could...”
“It will be like that!” he interrupted, slamming his cup down so hard that coffee splashed across his hand. “At that baseball game you had three shapeshifters and seven agents watching over you, and you were still almost killed. You were alone for less than five minutes before Anna found you—and in one more minute it would have been too late. We can’t protect you forever, Manda, and it would be a living hell for everyone involved while we tried. I already told you, this isn’t just about you. This woman has been tormenting Richard for fifty years. Fifty years! Now, with your help, we finally have a chance to catch her and put a stop to it. A chance like this won’t come again. They’ve made a mistake. We know that there are two of them now, but they don’t know that we know it. Don’t throw our one chance away, Manda. Not if you love Richard and want him to be happy.”
Kastl’s angry tirade caught Manda off-guard and she sat stunned for a moment. Very quickly, however, the storm of anger and resentment she felt overcame her shock. Her eyes narrowed and a caustic response hovered on her lips. She wanted very much to lash out at this arrogant and insufferable man who thought he could dictate her actions to her, but his words had planted a seed of uncertainty in her mind so she resolutely reigned in her temper and donned a façade of icy calm.
“I take it you, Josh, and Richard were the three shapeshifters watching over me?”
“At the game, yes. Daniel and Sarah have helped as well at times, when Richard and Josh couldn’t. One of us was always watching over you.”
“Daniel and Sarah too. I see.” Manda added this to the list of things she needed to consider. “Seven agents at the game. Was that normal?”
“No. Usually there were two or three guarding you at any given time, but at the game we brought in more. Whenever you’ve been in a crowd situation like that we’ve ramped up security.” He was calmer now. He dried his hand with a napkin, then crumpled it up and tossed it into the trash can. “You have no idea what lengths we’ve gone to trying to keep you safe. The ambulance for example; the paramedics were agents, of course. We’ve had three teams taking shifts for months now. That ambulance hasn’t been more than a mile or two away from you during that whole time. We’ve also had two agents placed inside the Aronson office, three on the building’s security team, two living a few doors down from you, and a dozen others taking turns following you all the time, not to mention Mikey and Mark. I lead a fairly good-sized team—every agent who’s aware of therianthropy, as a matter of fact—and every one of them has been dedicated to protecting you for the last nine months. Yet even with all of that, Richard was crazy with worry whenever you were out of his sight. After what happened in that bathroom, can you see how much worse it will be for him in the future? He’ll never have a moment of peace or security until we catch those two women.”
“This woman has been haunting Richard for fifty years?” Manda asked quietly—a focused quiet that would have worried anyone who knew her well.
“Yes.”
“And she’s threatened to kill every woman he’s ever loved?”
“Every woman to whom he’s ever been even overly friendly,” Kastl clarified.
“And no one thought that maybe I should know about this?” she hissed angrily. Her hold on her temper was definitely slipping.
Kastl exhaled heavily and considered his coffee cup. Manda had the impression he’d been waiting for this question.
“We were trying to protect you, and not just physically. Richard couldn’t stand the idea of you living in fear every day. We thought we could protect you without you ever having to know. Josh wanted to tell you all along, but Richard and I overruled him. I apologize for that. Richard wanted you to be safe, but he also wanted you to be happy.” He stepped across and refilled his cup, replacing the coffee that had splashed out.
“Josh wanted to tell me because he thought I’d be safer if I knew, and Richard didn’t want to tell me because he’s fairly overprotective and always thinks he has to carry burdens alone. I understand that. I get it. What I don’t get is you. What’s your motive in all of this?”
Kastl sat down on the stool across from Manda. “It’s my job to keep you safe,” he answered warily.
Manda fixed him with a sharp eye and shook her head slightly. “I would think that telling me about the danger would have made that job a whole lot easier. So why would you agree to keep it from me? You work for the government, right? Not Richard.”
Kastl’s thumb idly stroked the curved handle of his cup as he stared into the dark liquid it contained. “I swore to him that I’d protect you, and I don’t think causing you to live in constant fear qualifies as protecting you. More importantly, I don’t think Richard would consider it protecting you. And...I owe Richard.” He admitted the last part grudgingly. It was obvious he wouldn’t be more forthcoming on the subject.
“In case you have any doubts,” he went on, “I fully intend to keep my promise. So, whether you stay here where I know I can keep you safe, or whether you go home, where you put yourself in danger and jeopardize our chances of putting an end to this nightmare, I’ll be your constant shadow until we catch those two women...even if that takes the rest of your life. So, you might want to factor that into the equation when you’re trying to decide what to do.”
The vision of her life stretching out in front of her with Kastl constantly lurking in the shadows was unnerving, but Manda carefully maintained her mask of calm. She refused to give this man the upper hand.
“Where can I get a glass?” she asked, to give herself a moment to think. She was very thirsty.
“I’m sorry. I should have offered you something. You lost a great deal of blood and with so little of the factor in your system, and so little blood to work with, it wasn’t a perfect transformation. You’ll be a bit anemic and dehydrated and you’ll need to take in a lot of fluids over the next few days.” He crossed the kitchen and took a glass from a cabinet. “What would you like? We have milk, orange juice, or lemonade. We’ve got soft drinks, too, but you should probably avoid those right now.”
“I’ll just have water, thanks. I can get it,” Manda answered politely, reaching for the glass. Kastl ignored her extended hand, filling the glass with ice water from the dispenser on the front of the refrigerator before handing it to her.
“Thank you,” Manda said, still very politely, and sipped the water.
Kastl settled back onto his stool and leaned his arms on the counter. “I’m not going to
lie to you, Manda. This won’t be easy on you. It won’t be easy on anyone, but it will be worth it in the long run. I won’t presume to speak for your family and friends, because I don’t know them, but I do know Richard and Josh very well, and, for what it’s worth, I promise you that if you could ask Richard, he’d tell you to do this. He’d rather be miserable for a few years to keep you safe and have you back afterward, than lose you forever. He wouldn’t even have to think twice. I would imagine it’s the same with your family and friends.”
Once again Manda wished Richard were there to wrap her in his arms and make everything all right. She knew it was a childish wish, but she’d always felt safe and happy with him. The sudden, harsh realization bore down upon her that he couldn’t make this right—though she knew he would try. According to Kastl—and she was beginning to believe him, if not like him—things hadn’t been right for Richard in a very, very long time, yet his concern would still be for her with no regard for himself. Maybe it was her turn to try and make things right for him for a change...and with that she knew that she’d just made up her mind. That quickly, she knew she would do as Kastl asked.
She bowed her head and closed her eyes. Her voice, when she finally spoke, was stiff. “Fine. I’ll do it. I’ll give you one year. No more. So hurry up and catch them. I want to go home.”
“Fair enough. Thank you. I promise we’ll do everything we can to catch them quickly. Now that we have that settled, can I get you to give me a description of the girl who attacked you again? I know you probably don’t want to think about it, but we need to get a composite image while it’s still fresh in your mind. It could help us catch her.” He retrieved a laptop computer from the counter behind Manda and pulled up a stool beside her.
“Okay. Let’s get it over with,” Manda agreed uncomfortably. He was right. She really didn’t want to think about the attack. The feel of the claws tearing into her body was still very clear in her memory. She shuddered and was glad when Kastl didn’t notice.
Kastl signed onto his computer and then quickly clicked through a series of login screens. Finally he arrived at a screen that displayed icons of various facial features.
“Describe to me what she looked like and then I’ll let you pick which features are closest to her appearance.” They spent the next two hours sorting through dozens of photographed examples of eyes, noses, mouths, face shapes, and hair. At the end of that time they had a rough approximation of the girl’s face.
“That went well,” Kastl commented. “You’re very good at this. You have a good eye.” Manda wasn’t satisfied though.
“No, it’s wrong. Get me a computer and the right software and I’ll show you exactly what she looks like.” Manda’s voice was uncharacteristically hard. Remembering the attack had unsettled her, which in turn made her angry. She resented the fear that the memory brought with it, but that same fear had also indelibly burned the image of the girls face on her mind and she knew if she had her computer and software she could create a much better representation.
Kastl considered her with raised eyebrows. “Really? This is state-of-the-art software and you were very clear about her features, Manda. It’s not easy getting an accurate composite but I think you probably did very well. It’s not going to be perfect.”
“Have you been watching me all this time and not paid any attention to what I do for a living? I can do better than this,” Manda retorted, gesturing dismissively at the picture on Kastl’s computer screen. His skepticism rubbed her the wrong way in her current mood.
“Fine. That will be my first priority then. I’ll have that taken care of today.” He slid a pad of paper and pencil toward her. “Write down what you need.”
“Can I get my computer?”
“No. I can’t just take your computer. It would be missed, but I can get you a new one and have all of your files copied onto it. Write down what kind of computer and software you want and I’ll take care of it right away.”
Manda quickly listed her requirements. As an afterthought she added her choice of digital camera. If she was going to be stuck here she may as well have something to keep herself occupied. She slid the list back to Kastl. He scanned it, nodding. When he got to the end he smiled.
“Wait here. I can help with at least one of these right now.” He disappeared briefly and returned with Manda’s digital camera in his hand. “You had this in your pocket. It was a bit bloody, but I cleaned it up for you yesterday. I think it still works.”
“Thank you.” Manda held it in her hand and stared at it. This was the first familiar thing she’d seen all day. Not even her clothes were her own. She swallowed down the lump in her throat and carefully placed the camera on the counter. “You said you cleaned it up yesterday. How long was I out?”
“Just a little over thirty-six hours. Transforming when you were already so weak took a toll. Your body needed time to recover.”
“I see,” Manda responded sadly. As far as Richard was concerned, she’d already been dead for a day and a half. “Now, how is this going to work? How are you going to convince everyone that I’m dead? Won’t they wonder when there’s no body? How are you going to explain the attack?”
“A variation on the truth will work. You were stabbed and killed by one of Richard’s obsessed fans. Your family and friends will believe that. Richard, Josh, and Mikey will of course know the truth about your attacker. As for the lack of a body, your family will be told that due to the severity of your injuries and the following autopsy, you were cremated. Richard and Josh won’t question that. It would be standard procedure to cremate the body in that situation, since we would want to hide any evidence that would contradict our cover story.”
Manda tried not to think of Richard’s reaction to all of this. She focused on other, less painful if still important aspects of the situation. “What about my job? My house? Will it all be gone?”
Kastl frowned. “I’ll do what I can, but yes, they will probably be gone. I can’t make you any promises.”
“And Emily and the kids...” Manda’s voice broke.
“I’m sorry, Manda. I’m sure they’ve already been told you’re dead.”
Manda covered her face with her hands, remembering Richard’s cry as she lay in the ambulance and imagining Katie’s and Robbie’s reactions. She clenched her teeth and breathed deeply, willing the tears away. She would not be weak in front of this man. She collected herself and straightened her shoulders.
“So, as far as the entire rest of the world is concerned, I’ll be dead?” she managed to ask with a reasonably steady voice.
“Yes. Complete with death certificate and funeral. It has to be all or nothing.”
“And where will I hide? Here?” Manda picked up the camera on the counter and turned it over in her hands.
“Yes. You’ll be safe here. The only ones who know we’re here are you and I and the three agents from the ambulance. They’ll be doing all the legwork for us while I stay here on guard duty.”
In her mind, Manda said a little prayer. Please let this be over quickly! Out loud she said, “If I’m gonna be here a while, would you mind showing me around?”
Chapter 41
Manda gazed up through the canopy of trees overhead. She kicked her right foot to swing the hammock. It was tied between two large pine trees that grew beside a small stream that ran past the cabin. She blinked in the flashes of bright sunshine as her back and forth motion carried her through the dappled light beneath the rustling pine branches.
It was an idyllic spot. The burbling of the water flowing nearby mingled with the sound of the cool breeze gently stirring the trees. She was facing away from the cabin, so she was able to pretend it wasn’t there…and pretend that her various guardians weren’t nearby either. Instead, she fantasized that she and Richard were sharing a romantic vacation at a secluded mountain retreat. A hawk glided across a patch of open sky above her and she imagined that it was Richard. He would join her at any moment. His hand would reach out a
nd still her swaying perch and he would brush the hair away from her face and then lean down and kiss her before joining her in the oversized hammock. He would hold her close as the light, clean air caressed their skin. She could visualize his vivid blue eyes staring into hers, squinting in the dancing light and she imagined the lock of brown hair that sometimes fell across one eye.
Manda’s carefully constructed daydream evaporated when the black bird glided through the same patch of sky that the hawk had crossed moments before. The sight of Kastl keeping tabs on her brought unpleasant reality rushing back. Disappointment filled her but quickly turned to anger, which she suppressed. It wasn’t Kastl’s fault, after all. He was just doing what he thought was necessary to keep her safe and hidden.
Manda and Kastl had settled into a familiar, if slightly adversarial, relationship over the last two months. She’d learned that it was useless to challenge him about anything he considered a security matter, and he’d learned to ask for her cooperation rather than try to order her around like one of his agents. She had the impression that this wasn’t something he was accustomed to and he still occasionally fell back into the habit of issuing orders. Just that morning he’d barked a command and her irritation had boiled over.
“Who died and made you king?” she’d spat angrily. Then, realizing what she’d said, she’d smiled humorlessly. “Oh, I guess that was me, wasn’t it.” Kastl had laughed—something he seldom did—and Manda had done what he wanted without further argument and then escaped to her favorite spot in the hammock.
A month earlier she wouldn’t have given him the free pass but would instead have stubbornly held her ground until she’d forced him to ask very, very politely. Back then she’d disliked him and considered him cold and unfeeling. Now, however, she respected and trusted him…though she did still consider him exasperating in the extreme. The change had occurred when she’d caught a glimpse of the compassion he tried very hard to hide—when Anna had come.