by P J Gordon
him off.
“Would someone like to explain what the…,” he began, then paused when Richard made a warning sound and continued more carefully, “…explain what is going on please?”
“Sit down and I’ll tell you what I know. Manda will have to fill in the rest,” Richard suggested. “And I’ll have this back, thanks,” he added proprietarily, shooting Josh a challenging grin as he put an arm around Manda’s waist and drew her away from his brother. He pulled her down onto the sofa with him and wrapped his arms around her possessively. Manda smiled at Josh, who sat down in a large armchair and gave Richard a dirty look, though his lips kept twitching up at the corners in a persistent smile.
“So, I assume you found Kastl?” Mikey asked.
“Actually, Kastl found me, right after I talked to you,” Richard corrected. “By the way, I apologize for shouting at you Mikey. I was a little worked up, as what’s left of my phone can attest. Anyway, right after I hung up on you Kastl showed up and told me Manda was still alive. He’d been hiding her from Chelsea and Tina, which meant he’d hidden her from everyone else as well.” Manda felt the smallest of shudders course through Richard and she twined her fingers through his as his arms encircled her.
“The obvious question would be how you’re still alive?” Mikey prompted.
“You were hurt so badly,” Josh commented thoughtfully, then gasped. “Kastl changed you!”
“You got there a lot quicker than I did, but no,” Richard corrected him, “Manda isn’t a shapeshifter. Basically, Kastl and some of his friends have developed a way of altering our blood to create a sort of miracle cure, but it doesn’t change the recipient into a shapeshifter. Kastl was able to use that to save Manda.” He bent his head down and pressed a kiss to her collarbone and she shivered.
“He is so on my Christmas list from now on,” Josh promised with feeling.
“Yes. We definitely owe him a lot. Anyway, Kastl filled me in and then took me to Manda. I think she was glad to see me,” Richard continued, smiling smugly.
“I have a feeling it was mutual,” Josh chuckled to Manda, “but where have you been all this time?”
Manda quickly outlined the months she’d spent in her mountain hideout, not going into detail, merely painting the picture of her temporary exile in broad strokes. When she reached the previous day’s events she faltered.
“When Kastl told me I didn’t have to hide anymore I couldn’t quite believe it. It seemed like I would be a ghost forever.” She had felt like a ghost—existing outside of her own life, looking in but not allowed to participate. She shivered again.
“It’s over now, sweetie,” Richard murmured in her ear. “I love you and I’m never letting you go again.”
Mikey cleared his throat with a smile and then addressed them both.
“So, the video was completed after Manda was supposedly killed.”
Manda gasped. “How did you know?”
“Richard figured it out last night,” Mikey said dryly, “and I thought he’d finally snapped.”
“The last picture in the video was one you’d taken at the baseball game,” Richard confided, “after you had supposedly already finished editing it.”
“I guess I wasn’t as clever as I thought I was,” Manda said, chagrined. Then her eyes sparkled eagerly. “Did you like it?”
“It’s amazing!” Josh answered enthusiastically. “Richard played it at the concert last night. You should have been there! Everyone loved it.”
“I was there,” Manda admitted. “You were both incredible. I’ve never seen either of you better.” She squeezed Richard’s hands and tried unsuccessfully to keep her voice light. “I’ve never heard you sing Fairy Tale more beautifully.”
Detecting the odd note in her voice, and correctly guessing the cause, Richard voiced the thought Manda was trying to suppress. “And I promised I would only ever sing it for you,” he said in a solemn voice. “I kept that promise, Manda. Every word and note last night was for you. Have I mentioned that I really, really missed you?” His arms tightened around her and he buried his face in her hair, inhaling deeply before murmuring in her ear. “The flowers were for Lizzy, our stage manager. I asked her for the impossible last night and she came through for us.”
“That was the first time Richard has even been on stage when we performed Fairy Tale all tour,” Josh added. “I honestly didn’t know if he’d be able to do it.” Richard made an impatient sound and shifted restlessly, earning a defiant glare from Josh. “You’ve been wreck and you know it!”
There was a warning note to Richard’s voice when he responded. “I admit I didn’t cope all that well, and I already told Manda that you handled it better than I did. Can we just leave it at that? It hasn’t been easy on anyone, but it’s over now.”
Yes, it was over, but Manda knew that it still haunted Richard, just as it would continue to haunt the rest of them. Perhaps she could help dispel some of Josh’s ghosts though. Manda squeezed Richard’s hand reassuringly, knowing he wouldn’t like what she was about to ask of him. “Richard, I need to talk to Josh and Mikey. Could you please leave us alone for a little bit?”
“Oh. Okay,” he answered, and reluctantly unwrapped his arms from around her. “I guess I can go change.”
“No,” Manda corrected, steeling herself for his inevitable objections, “I mean really alone. I want you to go downstairs or something.”
An emotion akin to panic momentarily transformed his features before he could master himself enough to tease, “You’re kidding right? You’re already trying to get rid of me? Is it because I made you pay for the cab ride?”
She sighed, hating this as much as she knew he did, but she needed to talk to the other two men—Josh in particular—without Richard overhearing. “Definitely not. I don’t want you any farther away than this,”—she pressed herself closer to him to demonstrate—”but I need to talk to Josh about yesterday, and I think it’s best if you’re not around.”
Richard growled softly in frustration, obviously torn between his concern for Josh and his unwillingness to let Manda out of his sight now that he had her back.
“Don’t worry. I won’t let her get away,” Josh assured his older brother with a grin.
Richard still looked reluctant, so Manda shifted away from him on the sofa. “I can’t live in your pocket, you know. I can’t be with you every second of every day, as much as I’d like that.”
“I know. I just haven’t quenched my thirst for your company quite yet,” Richard complained with a fairly convincing attempt at levity. Only the tightness around his eyes betrayed his anxiety.
“You know, Richard, you might want to run over to the loft,” Mikey suggested with a meaningful, arch of his eyebrows. “You left something in your pocket a few months ago. I figured you might want it sometime, so I put it in your top dresser drawer.”
Richard looked startled and surprisingly excited. “I thought I’d lost it. Thank you, Mikey. I might just do that.”
Manda wondered fleetingly what was at the loft. In fact, she wondered why they weren’t staying there instead of in a hotel, but she brushed those stray musings aside, simply grateful to Mikey for the distraction.
Richard stood abruptly. “Well, if I’m going I should at least change and put some shoes on. Josh, where are my things?”
“On your bed,” Josh informed him, and then quickly moved to take the vacated seat beside Manda when Richard disappeared into the bedroom. “This is amazing, Manda. I can’t believe you’re alive. Does your family know? Or David?”
“No. No one but you three.”
“When will you tell them? Is that where you’re going next?”
Manda sighed. “Not today. Tomorrow. I don’t think I could do this again today. It’s a little overwhelming.”
“You look tired,” Josh noted after an appraising look.
“I’m exhausted,” Manda admitted.
Josh patted her leg sympathetically. “I’m supposed to call David
back later today. I called him to see if he’d seen Richard this morning. I’ll have to let him know that he turned up. We planned to hook up for dinner tomorrow night. I won’t tell him anything until you have a chance to see him.” His face brightened. “Maybe you and Richard could come to dinner tomorrow and surprise them—I think Stacey will be there too.”
Manda imagined David’s reaction to her sudden and unexpected reappearance and frowned uncomfortably. Then she imagined this reunion taking place in a crowded restaurant and her stomach churned in queasy rebellion.
“I don’t know. That might not be the best idea,” she demurred, but Josh had apparently latched onto the idea with both hands.
“No, it’s perfect! He’ll be so glad to see you!” He employed his secret weapon against her then, and it was all Manda could do to hold back another spate of tears as he looked pleadingly down at her with his wide, sad-puppy eyes. She had missed Richard so intensely it had overpowered other, lesser hurts, but now, here with him, she realized just how much she’d missed Josh as well. As much as she hated the idea of such a public scene, and as much as she feared the anger and condemnation she was sure she deserved because of her deception, she would have done almost anything to make her friend smile at that moment.
“We’ll see. I won’t make any promises, but we can talk to Richard about it.”
“I think it’s a great idea,” Richard interjected, emerging from the bedroom. “Josh is right. David will be overjoyed. I don’t know why you’re so afraid of how people are going to react. This is good news, you know.” He’d obviously been listening from the bedroom, demonstrating clearly why Manda needed him to leave if she was going to speak candidly with Josh. “We can talk about it more when I get back. I won’t be long, so discuss what you need to quickly and call me when you’re done. I’ll be waiting downstairs.” He bent over the back of the sofa and pressed a tender kiss to Manda’s cheek, whispering “I love you” in her ear before straightening and pointing imperiously at Josh and Mikey. “I am leaving my life with you two. You will care for her accordingly,” he commanded. Josh crossed his heart and raised his hand in silent promise.
“Don’t worry. We’ll take good care of her until you get back,” Mikey vowed, understanding that Richard’s lighthearted delivery had masked very real anxiety.
Thus reassured, Richard strode from the room, apparently wanting to get the whole thing over with as soon as possible. “Call me,” he directed one last time before disappearing out the door.
Mikey smiled when the door clicked shut. “Whatever it is you want to talk about, we’d better do it quickly. He’s going to be miserable until you let him come back.”
“Can I get you anything, Manda?” Josh asked, standing and walking to the wet bar in the corner. She could tell by the tilt of his head that he was listening to make sure Richard was gone before beginning their conversation.
“A glass of water would be nice. Thank you.” She wasn’t going to enjoy the conversation ahead, and nerves had left her mouth dry. When Josh brought her the water she wet her throat, and waited for his quick acknowledgement that Richard was gone before she began.
Josh had returned to the chair facing Manda, while Mikey had situated himself in its adjacent twin. Manda took a deep breath and addressed the two men.
“First of all, I want to thank both of you. Kastl told me how hard you all worked to keep me safe. I know I didn’t make it any easier, and I’m very sorry for that. I can’t even find the words to express my gratitude for all you did to try to protect me.” Manda paused to clear her throat. This wasn’t starting well. This was the least of the things she wanted to say to them and she was already getting choked up. “Secondly, I want to apologize to you, Josh, for the horrible things I said to you that day. I didn’t mean any of that, and I certainly don’t think you’re a monster. I’m so sorry. I just...”
“It’s okay, M,” Josh interrupted. “I know. I figured it out.”
Manda nodded gratefully and screwed up her courage to continue. The men waited in silence while she collected herself. “Thirdly, and more importantly, Richard told me what happened at the airport, and I know this doesn’t really mean much, but thank you both. What you did gave me my life back.”
“I just did what needed to be done, Manda. You don’t owe me any thanks,” Mikey replied quietly. “It’s not my favorite part of the job, but it is part of it. Josh saved more than just you yesterday though. If he hadn’t been so quick...” He shook his head at the prospect.
Josh was silent. He stared at the floor with a troubled frown puckering his brow. It seemed that Richard’s concern was justified.
“Are you okay, Josh?” Manda asked gently. “Richard’s pretty worried about you.”
“Well, I thought I was okay. Mikey and I talked about it this morning, and I could see why it was a necessary thing, you know. I didn’t like having to do it, but I knew that it had to be done. I mean, she was a killer. She’d killed you and she was trying to kill Mikey, but...” He trailed off, his expression a study in indecision and anguish.
“But Manda’s not dead and how do you know she really meant to kill me,” Mikey finished sympathetically. And that quickly they had come to the part Manda had been dreading. The last thing she ever wanted to do was think about what had happened in that bathroom, much less talk about it, but Josh needed to hear it—and Richard never could.
She took a steadying breath and addressed the two men solemnly. “You both have to promise me that what I’m going to tell you will never get back to Richard. I don’t want this in his head. I wouldn’t even tell you if I didn’t think you needed to know...especially you, Josh. Promise me that.”
“Of course,” Mikey agreed at once, but Josh hesitated.
“Manda, if this is something he needs to know...,” he began, but Manda was adamant.
“This is something he definitely does not need to know, I promise you. It’s over and done with and it would only torture him. He’d blame himself, even though it really had nothing to do with him.”
“My brother doesn’t do that,” Josh said with an ironic—if half-hearted—laugh. “Okay. I promise. He’ll never hear about it from me.”
“Thank you,” Manda replied fervently. She took another steadying breath, but couldn’t seem to dispel the constriction in her throat. She stood up and paced an agitated circle around the room, clenching and unclenching her hands at her sides. Mikey and Josh both watched her with increasing concern. Wherever she was going with this, it was obviously very difficult for her.
When she was finally able to speak, her voice was little more than a strained whisper. “Josh, I don’t want you to ever waste one minute of regret about killing Tina. Somebody had to do it. I’d compare it to putting down a rabid dog, but a rabid dog doesn’t really know what it’s doing. Tina did. I’m sorry you’re the one who had to do it, but promise me you won’t ever regret it. That girl...that thing...that attacked me in that bathroom wasn’t human. It was a monster—and not because she was a shapeshifter, or even because she was trying to kill me.” Manda swallowed painfully, trying to moisten her dry throat. This was even harder than she had anticipated. “If she’d just wanted to kill me, she could have done that before I ever knew she was there. I’d be dead right now, and nothing Kastl or anyone else could have done would have saved me. The only reason I’m still here is because she wanted to take her time and...savor it.” Manda’s voice caught and she closed her eyes, but the image of Tina stalking her across the bathroom with her malicious grin was too vivid behind her eyelids and she quickly opened them again. “Killing me wasn’t enough—she was more interested in watching me suffer, and the more she hurt me the more she enjoyed it.” She choked out the last sentence before her throat closed up completely, then wrapped her arms protectively around herself and looked down at the floor as tears trickled from her eyes despite her best efforts to suppress them.
“Oh God, Manda,” Josh breathed in shocked sympathy. His feet suddenly app
eared in front of her as she stared down at the floor, and he wrapped his arms around her in a comforting embrace. “I’m so sorry. Please don’t cry.”
A sobbing laugh forced its way past the constriction in Manda’s throat. “Sorry. I seem to be doing a lot of that lately.”
“Thanks for telling me, M. You’re right. No regrets about Tina. And I won’t say anything to Richard.” He shuddered. “I think that would be a really, really bad idea. He’s better now with you here, but that might just push him back over the edge.”
“I agree,” Mikey said, retrieving a box of tissues from a side table and bringing it to Manda. “It would be best if we just kept this between ourselves.”
Manda dried her eyes with one of the tissues and let Josh steer her back to the sofa. The words “that just might push him back over the edge” had lodged themselves in her mind.
“Was it really that bad...with Richard?” she asked apprehensively.
“He blamed himself,” Mikey explained, “and you know that’s the one person he’s not about to forgive.”
“He just stopped being Richard,” Josh added gravely. “The first week was the worst. I hope I never have to go through anything like that again.”
“He was practically catatonic that first week,” Mikey elaborated. “Scared the hell out of us.” He glanced guiltily at Manda and mumbled “sorry”—despite his earlier lapse, he obviously hadn’t completely forgotten Richard’s attitude toward profanity, especially in front of her.
“We couldn’t even get him to come to your funeral. I don’t know if he really knew what was going on around him at that point. Mikey and I went though, and Sarah and Daniel.” Josh pushed his hand through his hair in a very Richard-like gesture. “I don’t want to ever go through anything like that again either.”