Addicted to the Duke

by Bronwen Evans

  “Yet I can’t make you happy either. I’m not sure I know how to love.” He looked so sad. “If the worst happens and we cannot keep you safe from Fredrick or his men, you’ll have to marry one of us.”

  She rose, determined to go up on deck and try and clear the pounding in her head. “Do I have to make a decision right now?”

  Alex stood too. “No. But when we reach Pentati, yes. I won’t leave you ruined. I need to face Murad knowing you are safe and protected. You will need to decide—”

  “Decide what?” a voice from the entrance to the stateroom asked.

  She glanced at Alex, waiting for him to respond to David’s question. She watched something pass between the two men before Alex shrugged and said, “Whether she will accept my proposal.”

  She frowned at Alex. That hadn’t been their conversation. She was to choose. The tension in the room could be sliced with a dagger.

  “If you’ll excuse me, I would like to get some fresh air on deck.” And without looking at either man, Hestia left the cabin.

  Chapter 16

  Hestia leaned against the rail and let the sun wash her face with heat while the sea breeze and spray cooled her down.

  She faced an impossible choice. She could marry Alex and hope one day he might grow to love her. However, he would have to battle Murad to achieve peace, and she might end up a widow.

  Then there was Mr. Foxhall. David was handsome, kind, and wanted a family. But her heart belonged to Alex, and it was not fair that a man who had waited to find love should be saddled with her. She might not ever be able to love David as he deserved.

  So lost in the conundrum of her situation, she didn’t notice Jacob by her side until he coughed.

  “Troubles?” he asked with sympathy in his eyes.

  “Alex is going to face Murad. He’s going to get himself killed, isn’t he?”

  Jacob’s lips firmed and he looked out to sea for a few moments. He sighed and finally said, “Most likely. This is Murad’s territory, and due to his injury, Alex is not fighting fit.”

  “There is no way to dissuade him?” His eyebrows rose and she whispered, “Of course not.”

  “I don’t think I would try to stop him even if I could. There is something eating him up inside, and if Alex doesn’t get it out I’m not sure he’ll survive.”

  She pondered Jacob’s words. From the little Alex had told her, Jacob was most likely right.

  “The one thing I will swear to is that we will stop Fredrick Cary regardless of whether we find your father. I won’t let him hurt you.”

  She patted Jacob’s hand where it sat curled tightly around the ship’s railing. “I’m only safe if Fredrick is dead or I’m married. Neither option is one I like. To wish a person dead…” She shuddered.

  “Let’s see what happens when we go after the sloop. If we are wrong and Fredrick is not on it, then a marriage, and you quickly returning to England, would be the safest bet. Out here Fredrick could ensure a wedding notice does not make its way to London.”

  Cold, clammy fear gripped her. “Are you saying even if I marry, Fredrick could still kill me and deny the marriage took place?”

  “It’s a possibility. If Alex dies, Foxhall dies, who would society believe—me or the Earl of Pembrokeshire, as Cary would then be?”

  Even on this sunny day the sky darkened in her vision. However, it made Hestia realize marriage would not necessarily save her. Only a marriage in England would.

  “Then it seems pointless making a choice to marry when we reach Corfu. I’m not really any safer.”

  Jacob turned from the railing to look at her. “You’re a brave woman. You fought off Connor, never giving up. Love is the grand prize, and if there is a chance Alex can erase his ghosts and leave his terrible past behind him, then your heart’s desire might be in your grasp.” He looked her in the eye. “Is he worth waiting for—fighting for?”

  A smile formed on her lips. She didn’t even have to think. “Oh, he’s worth it.”

  “That’s my girl. Don’t let Foxhall or Bedford decide your destiny, or Cary for that matter.”

  Jacob was right. She’d been looking at this wrong. She was letting men dictate her life. First her father, then her experience at the hands of Murad, then Fredrick, and now Alex.

  “Are you married?” she asked.

  Jacob turned back to look at the sea. “Only to the sea. She’s a tough mistress. Just look at her beauty. But every now and then, if you take her for granted she punishes you.”

  “You don’t get lonely?”

  He let out a dry laugh. “It’s hard to be lonely on a ship full of men.”

  Hestia sighed and looked down at the deep blue sea below her. “I’ve been alone most of my life. I hate it.” She didn’t care who heard her when she yelled into the wind. “I want to share my life with someone who wants to share it with me. Someone who can put me first.”

  “Someone who loves you,” Jacob ended for her.

  “Yes.”

  Jacob nodded. “Very wise. There is nothing worse than living with someone and still feeling alone.”

  She gazed up at the old and wise sailor standing beside her. “I think we need a plan to ensure Alex survives his reckoning with Murad.”

  “I do have some ideas,” he said.

  “I knew you would.” She slipped her arm through his and suggested, “Let’s take a stroll around the ship and you can share them.”

  —

  David stood looking through the small grill, his lantern affording him very little detail of the captives held within, although the smell told him the state they were in.

  He glanced over his shoulder to make sure no one had followed him into the deepest recesses of the bilge where Connor was being kept under lock and key.

  Suddenly a bearded face peered at him through the grill in the sturdy oak door. Straining against the chains at his neck, hands, and feet—virtually helpless—Connor could only snarl at him.

  “I don’t need no doctor, unless of course you’re here to free me.”

  David stood looking at the man, more animal than man, and tried to feel pity. He had taken an oath to preserve life, but his hands itched to strangle the sneer off Connor’s face at the thought of what he would have done to Hestia if he’d managed to abduct her.

  He bent down and opened his doctor’s bag and withdrew a scalpel before standing and approaching the door.

  “I’m not here to free you. I’m here for information. Either you can give it to me freely, or I know exactly where to cut, jab, and poke to make your pain unbearable.”

  The sneer vanished from Connor’s face.

  “I’ve already told Jacob everything I know.”

  “Why don’t I believe you? Besides, I’m not sure Jacob asked the right questions. I, however, want some specific information that I don’t think you’ve shared with anyone.”

  In less than half an hour, with Connor minus one eye, David had what he needed.

  —

  In the end, Hestia refused to go ashore while they went after the sloop. Alex had to admit she was probably safer on the Angelica anyway.

  As soon as the sloop ascertained the Angelica’s intention, it tried to tack away, heading to hide in a group of smaller islands near the northern tip of Corfu. But Jacob positioned the ship to block their attempts by firing a few cannons over their bow.

  Hestia watched the action from inside her cabin, peering through the tiny porthole. The standoff lasted almost four hours before Jacob managed to land a cannonball so close to the sloop that the white flag ran up the mast as a sign of surrender.

  To her utter disappointment, when they drew up alongside the sloop and boarded her, Fredrick Cary was not on board.

  She watched Jacob’s men drag the captain of the sloop on board. She stepped away from the porthole and tried not to think what they would do to the man for information.

  This is why she hated the Mediterranean. Honor and fairness slipped away on the currents. Men be
came the creatures of nightmares.

  She hoped that Jacob’s plan could keep the nightmares at bay.

  Chapter 17

  Alex sat through dinner like a lion with a thistle in its paw. He wanted to roar every time Hestia bestowed that special smile on David and not him.

  Tomorrow afternoon they’d reach Corfu and she’d make a decision.

  He might have to watch her walk away from him, and even though he knew that was for the best, it was killing him.

  He had yet to tell David what he’d done, or why he should be the one to marry Hestia. It would strain their friendship, and if she chose Alex he would never have to admit to his actions. What would be the point of upsetting his friend if she picked Alex?

  Just then her eyes met his and the look of longing and love in them took his breath away.

  He smiled at her as the fortress around his heart crumbled. Damn, she would pick him and his world would change. He would marry her on Corfu, and find it almost impossible to leave her and seek his vengeance. But he owed Tulay. He had not protected her when she needed him to, so now he had to put her ghost to rest or he would remain haunted for the rest of his days.

  What did give him peace was the thought that even if Murad killed him, a small part of Alex would remain buried in Hestia’s heart and soul. She would remember him.

  His stomach clenched. If he had Hestia waiting for him, he wanted to survive. That’s what he dreaded. Would he be too focused on surviving to keep his edge, too scared to give everything to destroy his enemy?

  Tulay’s battered and bloodied body swam into vision, and he clung to that image. His oath to avenge her was all he had left to hold on to.

  “I must say that I’m really looking forward to stepping onto dry land. I hope your friends have a bath I may use. How did you meet Costa and his family?”

  Hestia’s question interrupted his morbid thoughts. He tried to smile at her. She sat in her oversized sailors’ clothes, but they could not disguise her innate femininity. Her hands were too clean and soft. She did not smell like a man. That orange blossom scent still clung to her, and her lips looked as soft as rose petals. His groin tightened at the idea of licking the drops of wine off them.

  If their enemy took this ship, Hestia was in grave danger, for any man would recognize her curves.

  The fuzzy image from his opiate-induced night of her lying naked beside him played in his head as he tried to concentrate on his answer. “I met Costa and his father just after I escaped Murad’s clutches. They found me drifting in a small rowboat in the middle of the Mediterranean.”

  Her forehead wrinkled as she frowned. “I thought my father rescued you.”

  “He did. He found out where Murad was keeping me and alerted Jacob and David.” He looked at David before quickly continuing. “They managed to get me out of Murad’s fortress, but…we became separated. I spied an unattended rowboat and launched it into the sea, only to find I was so weak I must have passed out. The little craft slipped from the harbor. I awoke on board Costa’s fishing boat a few days later.”

  As he lay recuperating, he’d managed to ask Costa to find Jacob, and Costa had. It saved his life because it brought him David too.

  What he did not tell Hestia was the weeks of agony he endured as the poison from the opium ravaging him left his body. He thought he’d die from the cravings, and it was only David that pulled him through.

  He looked across at his friend and felt the heavy burden of guilt. He owed David his life, and he’d talked him into looking at a marriage with Hestia and now…now he’d ruined that.

  “How long will we be on Corfu?” David asked.

  It was a leading question and Alex knew it. “That will depend on what information Costa has for me.”

  “Regarding the whereabouts of my father,” Hestia asked.

  “Exactly.”

  “No more than two days,” Jacob added. “News of a ship the size of the Angelica will travel. It’s hard to hide in in these waters. We have to keep moving and be prepared.”

  Jacob was not only worried about Fredrick. They had learned he was on another sloop. Murad would soon learn they were here and he would come after them. Alex inclined his head in agreement. “We need to find your father and get him and Hestia back to England as soon as possible.”

  The table fell silent.

  He watched David pat Hestia’s hand. “Don’t worry, my lady. I’m sure Costa will have good news for us when we reach Corfu tomorrow.”

  Hestia looked at Alex and he wished he could wipe the worry from her beautiful face, but he knew it was him she was worried for. She knew no matter what they learned on Corfu, Alex would insist on sailing after Murad.

  Still holding his gaze, she slowly stood. “It’s late, gentlemen. If you’ll excuse me.”

  Alex watched her leave the stateroom, and every voice in his head screamed to go after her, until he noticed David watching her with the exact same look on his face. He should do the honorable thing and leave her be. Give her time to make her choice.

  Choose me.

  Then again, he’d learned over the years that you shouldn’t give up on what you want. If he were a quitter he would have died in Murad’s prison. His problem was he did want her, but he didn’t want to want her.

  —

  As with the rest of his life, Alex discovered that willpower was sadly lacking when, just after one in the morning, he found himself in front of Hestia’s cabin door.

  Torn by indecision, he leaned his forehead on the door and warred with himself.

  There was a high probability that he would die in the coming days, so God, and David, could damn his soul to hell, but he wanted one night with Hestia, in his bed, where he was not in dreamland. He wanted a clear head to perfectly remember her touch. Her taste. Her scent. Her loving…

  To remember that for one magical night she was his.

  Selfishness, thy name is Alexander.

  He quietly slipped inside, closing the door behind him. He leaned back against the hard wood, warmth spreading through his chest because Hestia was standing beside the porthole, her thin linen nightgown completely transparent. It took his breath away.

  She turned to him. “Some prayers do get answered. I prayed you’d come.”

  He crossed the room in two long strides, his arms reaching for her and pulling her tight against his chest as his lips found the bounty he’d been dying to taste all evening. Her soft lips moved under his, and when they parted to give him entrance, his knees almost buckled.

  The kiss was hard, possessive, showing her that she belonged to him. Only him.

  Finally she tore her mouth from his.

  “You must have known I’d never choose David.”

  His heart took flight. “And here I thought you were an intelligent girl.”

  “Then why are you here?”

  He bent down and tenderly kissed her lips. “I can’t run anymore. I’m so sick of denying my need for you.” He grimaced, not believing how easily he’d folded. The future, and the world beyond finding her father, beyond seeking his vengeance, dissolved, along with his resistance. Years of resistance, wasted years.

  To deny his attraction for her had been futile from the start. The power she had over him was frightening. He belonged to this girl, body and soul, and he knew it. He could no longer refute his turbulent need for her.

  And thank God, for whatever reasons, regardless of his continued remoteness and cold treatment of her, she’d chosen him. His whole body was trembling, he’d never experienced such driving need, he was only just holding on, one minute more and he’d devour her. He swallowed hard.

  “You know I will still go after Murad. This night, and our wedding, will not change that.”

  “I haven’t said that I will marry you.” She cupped his cheek with her hand. “If my father can be found and Fredrick caught, I need not marry anyone.”

  “Then I must let you be.” As he turned to go she grabbed his arm. “Hestia, don’t play with me.
If you want me in your bed tonight you must agree to marriage. You’ll get hurt otherwise.” He placed his hand on her stomach. “What if you get with child?”

  “You said that would be unlikely.”

  He stood undecided, his need burning like a hot poker in his gut.

  She dropped his arm and stepped back. “Your need to do what’s right, to be kind, gentle, and honorable, are all the reasons I fell in love with you. I know you will go for Murad because you made a promise to a woman you cared for. I know you will marry me because you think you’ve behaved dishonorably toward me. But I chose to go into your bed. I knew you did not really understand I was there. You owe me nothing.”

  Alex’s heart beat swiftly as he stood breathing heavily in the small cabin, Hestia’s scent filling his nostrils. My darling, brave girl, you should push me away, not encourage me.

  Holding his gaze she began to pull at the small ties on the front of her nightdress. “Don’t ask me to stop, Alex. I want this night even more than you do. It may be the last time I ever make love. For you are the only man I will ever love.” On those words the last tie came undone and the white linen slid down her curves.

  His chest hurt as he slid his hand behind Hestia’s loose flowing hair and pulled her into a kiss.

  The heat from her mouth matched the scorching of his hands as they slid over her smooth, silky skin. Naked in his arms she felt like heaven.

  Hestia’s kiss was desperate, her lips parting his to allow her tongue to conquer his mouth.

  Any thought of stopping, of walking out of this cabin, fled with his building need to devour her.

  He swept her up in his arms and carefully laid her on the small bunk. His would have been preferable. “You should have come to my room,” he all but growled.

  She smiled up at him. “I think the bunk is perfect. You’ll be close to me.”

  Close? Very soon he would be closer than any man would ever be to her. “Just be careful of my side, since it’s so cozy.”