The Sweet Spot

by Ariel Ellman

  “Just make sure you protect yourself,” Kate warned Ani as their girls finally approached the gate. “I would have never thought that Jordan would be capable of anything like my bastard husband, but you just never know do you?” she muttered, shaking her head bitterly.

  “Kate, it’s not like that, really,” Ani said softly, reaching out to touch her arm. “Jordan didn’t do anything wrong, he’s a saint, it’s me.” Ani avoided Kate’s eyes in embarrassment. “It’s me,” she whispered, turning away from her speechless friend to catch Raffi who was running into her arms.

  “I missed you so much,” Ani murmured in her daughter’s hair as she hugged her tightly. Just then the rain started to pick up and Raffi squealed as the light drizzle turned into a downpour. Ani and Raffi waved good-bye to Erin and Kate who were huddled under the striped umbrella and they ran to their car, leaving Kate staring after Ani in surprise, still reeling from her declaration.

  “Have you moved into the loft yet?” Raffi asked her mother once they were settled in the car and out of the rain.

  “Why, are you sick of sleeping in Sawyer’s bed?” Ani teased her daughter as they drove away.

  “Well, I wouldn’t mind my own room,” Raffi laughed.

  “As a matter of fact we did move in, and your room is amazing,” Ani confessed, unable to hide her excitement.

  “You decorated it without me?” Raffi asked her mother in surprise.

  “I promise you’ll love it,” Ani assured her daughter, pulling up in front of the bakery. “I just want to grab some leftover baked goods from the bakery before we go home.”

  Raffi followed her mother into the bakery and helped her fill a few boxes up with leftover cupcakes, brownies and pastries.

  “Why do you have so much left over today? Raffi asked curiously, taking a bite of a brownie and licking a dab of frosting off of her lip with a sigh of appreciation.

  “I had to close early for an appointment,” Ani murmured, taping the last box shut. “But I knew I was closing early ahead of time so I didn’t make as much.” She leaned forward and took a bite of her daughter’s brownie.

  “Hey, get your own!” Raffi laughed, swatting her mother’s hand when she reached for another piece.

  “A few extra brownies and cupcakes left over isn’t too bad is it?”Ani teased as Raffi popped the last of the brownie into her mouth.

  “Uh uh,” Raffi agreed, her mouth full of brownie.

  “So you ready to see your new room?” Ani asked her daughter after they locked the bakery up and ran back through the rain to the car.

  “Yes!” Raffi replied excitedly, and they drove down the block and around the corner to the loft.

  “I really love this neighborhood,” Raffi confided softly to her mother as they walked into the loft. “And I’m glad you got a place that we can walk to the bakery from.”

  “Me too,” Ani agreed, giving her daughter’s shoulder a gentle squeeze.

  “Wow,” Raffi exclaimed when they walked into the loft. “This place is amazing mommy.” She walked around, taking everything in.

  “We have so much left to do,” Ani hurried to explain as her daughter gazed around at the space, taking in all of the colors and the funky shelves that Sebastian had built into the walls. “We still have to buy furniture and finish all of the decorating,” Ani murmured as Raffi wandered over to the window seat that Sebastian had built into the wall and sank down onto the deep cushion.

  “I love this,” Raffi declared with a grin, stretching out like a cat and gazing across the loft and up at her room for the first time. “Oh my God, is that my room?” She stared at the winding steps leading up to the stunning painting of the archangel Raphael.

  “Yes,” Ani replied with a grin, relishing the excitement and pleasure that shone on her daughter’s face.

  “It’s so cool,” Raffi exclaimed, jumping up and running across the room to the staircase.

  “Careful,” Ani yelled at her daughter with a laugh as Raffi bounded up the steps to her room.

  “Mommy!” she screamed when she stepped behind the wall.

  “What do you think?” Ani asked softly, coming up behind her daughter.

  “Did Sebastian do all this for me?” Raffi asked her mother in wonder as she walked around her room, running her fingers over the walls and gazing around dreamily.

  “Yes,” Ani whispered, overcome with emotion as she noticed the new additions that Sebastian had added since she’d first seen the room. She had bought Raffi a mattress and beautiful bedding set with soft rose and purple colored flowers with matching throw pillows, and she’d set it up three days ago. But since then, Sebastian had built her a platform frame for the mattress and an incredible twisted branch headboard which he wove strands of pink and purple beaded lights through. He’d also hung the canopy that she’d gotten Raffi, so a soft cloud of gossamer violet surrounded her bed.

  “I love the birds,” Raffi whispered, touching the delicate felt and organza birds that were sewn onto her canopy.

  “I knew you would,” Ani said in satisfaction as she hugged her daughter to her chest.

  “I don’t know what to say mommy, it’s so amazing,” Raffi admitted, staring at her mother in shock. “I can’t believe he did all of this for me.”

  “He was happy to do it,” Ani replied hoarsely, trying to find the words to explain to her daughter how much Sebastian wanted to repair the damage that he’d done to her life. She could see it in the set of his shoulders as he worked on Raffi’s room; she could see the emotion when he talked about her. “He wants you to be happy here.”

  “I love the room,” Raffi replied quietly against her mother’s chest. “Tell him thank you.”

  “You can tell him yourself,” Ani replied carefully. “He’s cooking us dinner tonight.”

  “I hope he’s a better cook than daddy,” Raffi replied with a small laugh, and Ani hugged her daughter tightly in relief and joined in her laughter.

  “Hi,” Sebastian called out a little while later as he walked into the loft loaded down with grocery bags.

  “What are you making?” Ani asked, kissing Sebastian hello and taking two of the bags from him.

  “Pizza,” Sebastian replied, dumping the bags on the kitchen counter in relief and flexing his fingers to restore their circulation. “Hi there,” he called to Raffi who was sprawled out on the window seat with a book.

  “Hi,” she replied shyly.

  “Do you like pizza?” Sebastian asked hopefully.

  “I love it,” Raffi admitted.

  “Want to help make it?” Sebastian asked casually as he unpacked the bags. “You can pick the toppings,” he offered with a smile.

  “Okay,” Raffi agreed hesitantly, rising up and joining Sebastian and Ani in the kitchen.

  Ani put some music on and started to pull out cutting boards and pizza pans.

  “My mom makes her own pizza dough,” Raffi confided as Sebastian pulled two large saran wrapped balls of dough out of a bag.

  “I taught her how when she was fifteen,” Sebastian replied with a grin.

  “Really?” Raffi asked curiously.

  “Yep. You thought your mom was the expert baker, but you didn’t know that she learned to make pizza from me did you?” Sebastian teased, washing his hands and flouring the board in front of him.

  “Noooo,” Raffi admitted, washing her hands and joining Sebastian at the counter.

  “When I was sixteen I got a job at Tony’s pizza,” Sebastian explained as he and Raffi stretched out the dough and prepped it on the floured boards in front of them.

  “Yeah and Tony wouldn’t let Bast near the pizza dough for over a year,” Ani laughed as she opened up a bottle of red wine and let it breathe on the counter behind them.

  “Why not?” Raffi asked as she passed Sebastian a large pot to make the pizza sauce.

  “Because I’m Irish, not Italian,” Sebastian laughed as he dumped crushed tomatoes into the pot. “He started me off mopping the floors and clearin
g the tables and eventually let me do things like prep the salads and assemble the pizza boxes, but he swore he’d never let my scruffy Irish butt near his pizza.” Sebastian grinned.

  “So how did you learn how to make pizza?” Raffi asked with interest as she watched Sebastian chop fresh basil and garlic for the sauce.

  “Raffi,” Ani broke in softly as she poured Sebastian a glass of wine and set it in front of him.

  “Actually, I’d love a cold beer instead baby,” Sebastian said with an apologetic smile as he leaned over and kissed Ani in thanks.

  “What?” Raffi asked her mother in confusion when she said her name.

  “No, it was Raffi, Sebastian’s brother who got Tony to change his mind,” Ani explained with a laugh, taking Sebastian’s wine for herself and passing him a cold beer from the fridge.

  It was always little moments like these that reminded Ani that she was more used to Jordan’s tastes than Sebastian’s. Jordan drank beer when he watched football or grilled burgers, but otherwise he preferred a glass of wine to a beer. When Ani thought about it, she realized she’d rarely seen Sebastian drink wine since they’d been together.

  “What did he do?” Raffi asked, stirring the sauce and adding the chopped garlic and basil that Sebastian had set aside.

  “Raffi did what he always did,” Ani laughed. “He charmed the pants off of Tony’s daughter Julianna, and convinced her mother to teach him how to make the secret Fiorri pizza dough at her house one day after school. Then he came home and taught Sebastian. Bast had been complaining for almost two years that Mr. Fiorri was never going to let him make pizza and Raffi was sick of it, so he took the matter into his own hands,” Ani explained, sharing a tender look with Sebastian. “That was Raffi to a t.”

  “So then what happened?” Raffi persisted as she and Sebastian moved on to washing and prepping the pizza toppings while the sauce bubbled in the pot.

  “I practiced making dough every night after I got home for three weeks,” Sebastian admitted with a grin.

  “His father was ready to kill him,” Ani laughed. “The kitchen was always covered with flour and there were bits of dough everywhere from Bast whirling the dough around in the air and dropping it on the kitchen floor.”

  “True,” Sebastian conceded, his eyes twinkling at Ani with mischief. “But I finally got it down, and I made you the best pizza you’d ever had.”

  “Well, after he made me choke down the worst pizza I’d ever had first,” Ani corrected teasingly.

  “Hey, I ate an entire scone from your first batch when you used salt instead of sugar,” Sebastian reminded Ani, swatting her on the behind playfully.

  “He did,” Ani laughed, wrinkling her nose at the memory of her salty scones.

  “You guys have a lot of memories together,” Raffi observed quietly as she gathered up the mushrooms that she’d sliced and dropped them into a bowl.

  “We do,” Sebastian agreed carefully, “but only from our childhood. I’d love to hear about some of your memories with your mom.”

  “Well,” Raffi began slowly, pondering Sebastian’s question as she nibbled on a piece of pepperoni that he had just sliced. “Did you know that my mom is a horrible surfer?” she asked with a devilish grin that made her look so much like Jordan that Ani had to look away for a moment as her heart ached.

  “I did not,” Sebastian laughed, slicing fresh mozzarella cheese. “But I can’t say I’m that surprised. Your mother has always had horrible coordination and she was never a great swimmer.”

  “The surfing instructor told my dad that my mom was the worst student he’d ever had when we went to Hawaii for my birthday last year,” Raffi cackled.

  “Tell me more of your mom’s stories,” Sebastian prodded as he and Raffi began to ladle sauce onto the pizza dough.

  “She loves scary movies, but you probably already knew that,” Raffi said, wrinkling her nose in disappointment.

  “Actually your mom hated scary movies when she was younger, they terrified her,” Sebastian replied, gazing at Ani with interest.

  “Well she loves them now,” Raffi declared in satisfaction. “She and Aunt Sawyer go to gory horror movie festivals and my dad gets soooo grossed out when she comes home with props.”

  “What kind of props?” Sebastian asked Raffi, staring at Ani in fascination.

  “Rotting zombie hands, blood spattered t-shirts, silly things,” Raffi explained, sprinkling grated cheese and pepperoni on one of the pizzas while Sebastian covered another with fresh mozzarella slices and caramelized onions.

  “Hmmmm, you need to stick around and tell me more of your mom’s secrets,” Sebastian said to Raffi with an affectionate smile. “I think I have a lot to learn about this new horror movie freak and horrible surfer Ani,” he teased, sliding the pizzas into the preheated oven.

  “Raffi will never tell you the good secrets,” Ani replied, sticking her tongue out at Sebastian. “Girl code of honor right Raff?” She smiled over at her daughter.

  “Well….. he makes pizza and he’s an amazing painter,” Raffi replied with a laugh.

  “Does that mean you like your room?” Sebastian asked Raffi, gazing at her seriously.

  “I really love it,” she replied shyly, meeting Sebastian’s serious gaze. “Thank you very much.”

  “I’m glad, and you’re welcome,” Sebastian replied simply, turning away and starting to clean up their mess.

  Sawyer didn’t come home for dinner, and after Ani, Sebastian, and Raffi ate, Sebastian took off with a bakery box of leftover goodies to give Ani and Raffi some time alone on their first night together in their new apartment.

  “Is that your second cupcake?” Ani asked her daughter with a raised brow as she set a cup of hot chocolate down in front of Raffi on the coffee table.

  “Maybe,” Raffi replied with a grin, licking the telltale frosting off of her top lip guiltily.

  “How was the weekend with daddy at Mimi and Grandad’s house?” Ani asked her daughter, settling down onto the couch beside her with her glass of wine.

  “It was nice. We collected a lot of seashells and we went out for lobster,” Raffi replied.

  “I want to start a seashell and sea glass collection here, so if you want to bring any of yours over, we can display them on the shelves,” Ani offered.

  “Sure, that would be nice,” Raffi agreed quietly.

  “I’m also going to pick some things from the house to bring here and I wanted to know if there is anything from home that you’d like to have here, anything that would make this feel more like home for you,” Ani asked carefully.

  “You mean like furniture?” Raffi asked, wrinkling her brow in confusion.

  “Furniture, or a painting, or certain dishes….” Ani replied, her voice trailing off uncertainly.

  “Well wouldn’t daddy miss the things if we took them from the house?” Raffi asked, biting her lip.

  “Well, since daddy and I won’t be living together anymore, we’re going to split some of our stuff up. I won’t take anything that is special to daddy,” Ani assured her daughter.

  “You’re special to daddy and you’re taking yourself away,” Raffi observed quietly, staring at her mother with a challenge in her eyes.

  “That’s true,” Ani replied carefully, meeting her daughter’s gaze. “And I’m very sorry about that, but daddy would rather I take myself away than keep me if it’s not the right thing for us.”

  “I don’t think that’s true,” Raffi countered. “I think that he would keep you if you would stay no matter what.”

  “But I can’t stay,” Ani replied sadly.

  “Because of Sebastian,” Raffi stated matter of factly.

  “Not because of Sebastian,” Ani replied, choosing her words carefully. “I can’t stay because of what’s in my heart. It wouldn’t be fair to daddy in the end. Your father is a wonderful man, Raphael, and he deserves to be with someone who loves him with her whole heart, someone who will cherish all of the amazing things about him
and never let him go,” Ani choked as her eyes started to fill with tears.

  “Yes he does,” Raffi agreed softly, setting her mug on the coffee table and rising up from the couch. “Good night mommy,” she murmured, turning and walking away without giving Ani her usual goodnight hug and kiss.

  “Good night baby,” Ani whispered, watching her daughter walk away.

  Chapter Twenty

  “Hello, anyone home?” Sawyer called out, striding into the loft with a drop dead gorgeous Kate Moss look alike trailing behind her.

  “Hey,”Ani called out softly in response from the couch where she was sitting with her legs up on the coffee table, reading the Sunday paper and drinking a cappuccino.

  “Is Sebastian snoring?” Sawyer asked with a grin as she and her model walked over to the couch.

  “A little,” Ani admitted with a laugh, gazing down tenderly at Sebastian who was sprawled out on the couch in nothing but his boxers, napping peacefully with his head in Ani’s lap.

  “He’s been working so much lately, trying to do everything for our apartment and going out on the boat with his dad, he’s totally exhausted,” Ani declared, running her fingers over Sebastian’s cheek gently.

  “Ani, this is Siobhan, Siobhan, my sister Ani,” Sawyer introduced the girl standing beside her to Ani. “And that tattooed freak snoring in her lap is her boyfriend Sebastian,” Sawyer added with a laugh.

  “Savage ink,” Siobhan murmured in a lyrical Irish accent as she gazed at the Celtic shield on Sebastian’s bare chest in appreciation.

  Sebastian startled awake at Siobhan’s soft words and he sprung up almost instantly, blinking and gazing around at his surroundings cautiously.

  “Jaysus, relax the cacks, and mind your scunders now,” Siobhan said with a mischievous grin as she glanced down at Sebastian’s boxers that had gapped open a little when he sprung up.