Bella

by D. J. Barrett

  “The keys are usually left in his draw.” Simon replied.

  Tammy anxiously started looking for father’s keys once again but couldn’t find them.

  As Lizzie was about to leave the room she turned to Tammy; her face full of anger, and screamed.

  “I could’ve married my half-brother.” I started to feel worried and confused. What other secrets had my family been keeping all these years, was it anything to do with the whispering I used to hear late at night.

  Simon snapped at Lizzie.

  “Shut up and sit down.” Then turned to Tammy.

  “Well, you’d better tell us the whole story then?”

  “It`s better we find the letter your father wrote to you all first.” She replied.

  We all began searching for father`s keys; I ran upstairs and looked in his room. I remembered he used to put important things in his bedside draw, in a locked box.

  As I opened the wardrobe doors, the smell of my mother’s perfume filled the air. Her favourite was lavender water. I picked up one of father’s jumpers; I could still smell his aftershave. At times like this, I wished my parents were still here. I could still hear mother’s voice telling me not to worry, that everything would be alright.

  Tears stinging my eyes, I laid on mother’s side of the bed sobbing. Simon came in and sat down.

  “Don’t cry Bella my love! Please don’t cry.” he said as he wiped away my tears and kissed me softly on my cheek. “No matter what news we are going to hear I will help you get through it.” He said lovingly.

  CHAPTER THREE

  We didn’t find the keys we were looking for. All we could do was try and get on with our lives. Simon was always busy at college and when he was home, he spent most of the time in his bedroom. I wanted to be a psychologist but found it difficult to concentrate on my work at college. Lizzie moved out and got an apartment with her latest boyfriend James. I lost count of how many boyfriends she’d had; she often teased me that I would end up an old maid. The truth is, I had never once kissed a boy, or even fancied any.

  I’d just turned seventeen and had a fine figure; my face was looking more like mother’s every day. Over the next two years, I buried my head into my work at college, I never dated any boys and Simon never really dated any girls.

  Lizzie had just announced she was going to marry James. I liked him, he was good for her. He was the owner of a restaurant, near the cliff top, with panoramic views of the sea.

  James was five years older than Lizzie and a wonderful chef. He’d learnt his trade in a small restaurant in a village called Hinderwell, not far from his home town Lythe, on the North East coast.

  James was tall and slim, with thinning hair and a small beard. I wouldn’t say he was handsome; but he had a lovely personality which made my sister happy.

  He invited us all to his restaurant to celebrate their engagement. Lizzie asked me if I’d heard from Ben who was away at university in Cambridge. He was taking a course in fashion designing.

  We hadn’t seen him for six months so it was going to be nice to have the whole family together for this occasion. I managed to contact Ben at University and tell him the good news, he didn’t exactly sound thrilled, but said he would come anyway.

  A couple of days later, Simon brought a girl back home and announced he had been dating her for quite some time. Why hadn’t he told me about her…. I thought. I had this overwhelming feeling of envy and hatred inside of me and didn’t really understand why.

  Her name was Victoria, she had short red cropped her, green eyes and freckles. She was training to be a hairdresser and looked very stylish and trendy. She wore the latest fashion in clothes and looked very elegant unlike me. I’d never really dressed in trendy clothes. I preferred casual clothes such as jeans and tee shirts.

  The day of the engagement arrived. I decided to treat myself to a complete makeover. My hair was restyled with the help of Victoria, who added a few highlights to my new hairstyle. I must admit I did look good, my hair looked shiny and sleek and my make up made me look really grown up. I treated myself to a dress; it was a tight fitting red dress, with a plunging neckline, which showed off quite a bit of cleavage. It was very short and I wasn`t used to wearing anything like it. As I started getting ready, I found myself thinking of Simon, he hadn`t seen me in a dress like this before.

  I finished it off by putting on a pair of black stiletto heels. I couldn’t believe the reflection looking back at me; I had to admit I did look smashing.

  We all agreed to meet at the restaurant. Tammy had gone to pick Ben up from the station and Simon said he might be late.

  Feeling a million dollars, I got into my small mini coupe and headed for the restaurant. I hadn’t felt this nervous in a long time. I arrived there before anyone else, so decided to go and powder my nose.

  As I waited in the lobby of the restaurant, James pulled up in his car with Lizzie; I could see her looking in the car mirror touching up her make-up. Simon pulled up in his car with Victoria and parked alongside James.

  I waited nervously, watching Simon getting out of his car. He was wearing a dark pair of slim fitting trousers and a royal blue shirt; he looked very handsome. He opened the passenger door for Victoria. She was wearing a dark green dress which complimented her red hair. I could feel my heart beating like a drum in my chest and was sure that everyone could hear it. I escaped to the toilets to check my make-up once again.

  As I headed towards the table where everyone was seated, I noticed Simon’s eyes were on me the whole time. I sat down and Victoria told me I looked stunning.

  Lizzie looked lovely; she was wearing a very sexy black laced dress and James was wearing a very expensive black suit with a pink shirt. Tammy and Ben were sitting next to Simon and Victoria. Tammy was wearing a powder blue dress and Ben wore a pair of slacks and a white shirt.

  Throughout the whole meal I could feel Simon’s eyes glancing my way and felt sure that everyone could see me blushing.

  After we finished our meal, the waiter brought a bottle of champagne to the table. James was very romantic and got down on one knee and proposed to Lizzie, the ring was eighteen carat gold with a large square diamond; this was the first time Lizzie had seen the ring. She looked very pleased and was beaming like a Cheshire cat. The waiter filled our glasses with champagne and we all stood up and congratulated them. James took Lizzie`s hand and told us how much he loved her. We all looked at the ring and I could feel a stab of envy.

  Victoria looked at Simon and casually dropped hints at him by saying,

  “Darling, we’ve been together a while now, maybe we should think about doing the same?” But Simon didn’t respond and pretended he didn’t hear. I made my excuses and decided it was time to leave. As I got up, Simon came round to where I was sitting and looked into my eyes and held them there for what seemed minutes, I was sure everyone was looking at us.

  “Before I leave I’d just like to say thanks for a lovely evening. Congrats to my big sister for finally settling down. James thanks for putting up with my awkward sister and for inviting us to you restaurant. The food was delicious.”

  Driving home all I could think about was Simon and how I’d feel if he did think about proposing to Victoria.

  Over the next few weeks I tried to put Simon and the feelings I had out of my mind.

  Ben was still home and we’d become quite good friends. I actually couldn’t understand what he`d actually seen in Lizzie, as he was such a nice guy and she could be extremely difficult sometimes.

  Later that week he went back to university to finish his course, so now it was just Tammy and I.

  Recently Tammy thought it would be better to sell our family home and buy something a bit smaller.

  I asked her if it was ok if I moved to the new house with her.

  “Of course you can love.”

  Simon moved out and got his own lovely apartment overlooking the sea; it wasn’t long before Victoria moved in with him.

  Tammy found a lovely
cottage not far from the beach, but it was quite a bit smaller than the home I was used to.

  I started packing up my belongings, and Tammy asked me if I’d pack away my parents things saying it was much too painful for her. I found it painful too, but someone had to do it and it was time to put the past behind us.

  I started packing mother’s clothes away into bags, the scent of lavender still lingered on them even after all that time. It was then I decided that if we were to have a fresh start, It would be better to give the clothes away to our local charity shop.

  As I started going through my father`s draw I noticed his glasses case, and it reminded me of him sitting in his office with his glasses perched on the end of his nose and his hair looking like it needed to have a good comb.

  I looked in his glasses case and I saw some keys. Were they the keys that Tammy had been looking for all this time?

  I often wondered if secrets were best kept a secret, especially because at that time no one seemed to be really bothered about them.

  Out of Curiosity, I opened the safe in father’s office, Inside was a large box, I tried the other key; it opened; inside there was an envelope with my name, along with Lizzie, Simon and Ben’s.

  I wanted to open the envelope but I was shaking, what did father need to tell us, could it be life changing?

  I decided not to tell Tammy that I’d found the letter and put it away safely in my bag, I then put all my parent’s clothes in the boot of the car ready to take to the charity shop.

  Tammy’d just finished cleaning the house ready for the people who had bought it.

  As we left the home I’d grown up in I looked back with a heavy heart and Tammy gave my hand a squeeze.

  “A home is what you make it Bella, this is just bricks and mortar, and once all our things are in our new place, it will feel like home once again, you will see dear.”

  In some ways I wasn’t sorry I was leaving the house we called home, with all its whispering and secrets.

  Our new home was very cosy with neutral décor and wooden flooring throughout, our kitchen had solid based units with integrated appliances and a big aga stove. Our living room had a large open fireplace.

  It was December and very cold so Tammy lit the log fire, and then she looked at me.

  “I’ve decided we’re going to have all the family together

  this Christmas.”

  I wanted to have the whole family together at Christmas, but the thought of seeing Simon and Victoria together made me feel uncomfortable.

  Ben had broken up for the holidays, so Tammy told me she was off to pick him up. That afternoon Lizzie and James came to see us and announced they’d set a date for the wedding and it would take place the following June. Lizzie asked me to be her bridesmaid and I was delighted to accept.

  Lizzie laughed and said.

  “Maybe you’ll find a nice man and get married one day Bella.”

  “Ha, ha, very funny Lizzie.” I answered.

  As we decorated our new home for the festive season the aroma of the food Tammy was cooking made my mouth water.

  James, Lizzie and Ben had gone to meet Simon at our local pub the Cross Keys for a drink, to talk about the pending wedding.

  After I’d finished decorating the Christmas cake I washed my hands, then went upstairs to my bedroom, put a comb through my hair, wrapped up warm, and decided to head off to the beach.

  The snow was falling and it looked so pretty. I loved this time of year and I felt really excited because the very next day would be my eighteenth.

  I sat on the bench overlooking the sea, everywhere was quiet, and most of the shops had closed for the holidays. It was starting to get dark and the street lamps had just come on. It was freezing, so I pulled my scarf tighter around my neck. I was looking forward to Christmas and felt excited because ever since I was a little girl, I`d always helped to decorate the tree on Christmas Eve.

  Suddenly a wave of sadness came over me as thoughts of my parents and how they’d chosen my name came into my mind. We`d always decorated the tree together and I wished they could’ve been there once again to decorate it with me.

  Tammy’d told me that she had ordered a real tree and Simon was going to bring it the next day.

  I shook off the melancholy feeling and started to remember the good things, like the time I used to sit there with my mother and eat fish and chips out of newspaper, she always said they tasted so much better that way, then we would end up licking the newspaper giggling.

  I must have been in a trance, because I didn’t notice the man standing beside me until I heard a voice saying,

  “Excuse me, is it ok if I sit ere?”

  I nodded and the man sat down next to me, I noticed his accent was different.

  “Ciao, my name’s Marco. I move here from Italy not long ago.”

  He must have been at least 6’2; he was wearing a big thick leather coat and he looked a lot like a young David Essex. He looked at me.

  “What’s your name?”

  “Oh I’m sorry, my name’s Bella.” He laughed.

  “Bella…..Bella in Italian means beautiful and good name for you. You are Bella …….”

  I could feel myself blushing.

  “What such a beautiful lady doing out alone on such a cold evening, or maybe I bad man to ask?”

  We talked for a while then I looked at my watch.

  “I better go home now, otherwise my step mother’ll send out a search party.” I told him.

  “I have a night off on Saturday, can I see you again?“

  “You don’t waste much time do you.” I laughed. “OK! I`d like that.” I told him. I felt happy knowing I was going to see this gorgeous Italian again.

  We started heading towards my home and I pointed to my house in the distance.

  “That’s where I live; we haven’t been there very long,

  but I already love it so much, it’s very cosy.”

  Marco was a gentleman and walked me all the way home. I decided not to invite him in though, as we had only just met.

  “I pick you up on Saturday evening then, about 8. Is that ok? I take you to a good lobster restaurant my friend at work tells me about.”

  His sexy accent and his cheeky smile made my knees wobble.

  “8 o`clock is fine.” I managed to answer.

  He looked at me and said.

  “You have such beautiful blue eyes. I not want to take my eyes from you.”

  I felt myself blush and didn’t know what to say.

  He gave me a kiss on my cheek and I felt a warm tingle running down my spine.

  At home Tammy was in the kitchen making a coffee

  “Is that you Bella? Where’ve you been so long? I was worried about you.”

  “I went for a long walk along the beach and met a gorgeous Italian man called Marco. We talked for ages and then he asked me for a date on Saturday.”

  Tammy looked worried.

  “Be careful Bella, you don`t know this man.”

  “I will be fine Tammy, stop worrying so much. I’m a big girl now.”

  The next morning Tammy cooked me a birthday breakfast. She’d invited all the family to celebrate. We sat at the table and tucked into a full English breakfast; with freshly squeezed orange juice and ground coffee.

  Tammy gave me a beautiful gold locket with a picture of my mother and father in it. I kissed her on the cheek.

  “Oh thanks, It`s beautiful, it’s the best present I‘ve ever had,” I told her excitedly.

  Lizzie and James give me a voucher to buy a book: I loved reading, especially snuggled up in bed on a cold winter’s night. Simon and Victoria gave me a gold watch with my name engraved on the back of it and Ben gave me a dress he’d designed at University.

  “Thanks so much. They are lovely presents.” I said.

  Later that morning, Tammy asked me to go shopping with her and treated me to lunch.

  Just as we arrived back home, Simon arrived in his jeep with our Christmas tree.
Tammy made a start on the food for my party and Simon stayed to help me decorate the tree. As I reached into the box to take out the last bell, he had the same idea and our hands touched. It was like an electric shock running through my veins. I pulled my hand away quickly.

  “Bella, I just wanted to hand this to you because it’s your name sake. What did you think I was going to do…….” He chuckled.

  That evening we all laughed and had a few drinks. Lots of food had been laid out on our big dining room table, sausage rolls, sandwiches, chicken drumsticks, and yummy mouth-watering cakes. The best thing of all was my chocolate birthday cake Tammy had made. Everyone gathered round and sang ‘happy birthday.’ Simon held my gaze for a few seconds and smiled. My heart always did a somersault when he smiled; he had such a lovely smile.

  Tammy had made a punch, which left me feeling rather tipsy.

  I decided to go outside and get some fresh air. I sat on the veranda taking in big breaths air hoping it would sober me up.

  The snow was coming down heavy and fast and looked like a thick white carpet. How pretty it looked falling down over Lighthouse Cove. I shivered; It was freezing but I didn`t want to leave just yet.

  Simon came outside and sat down and put his arm around me. My heart quickened with excitement.

  “I haven’t had a chance to talk to you lately Bella, I miss our chats.”

  He gave me a kiss on the cheek, his breath felt warm against my cold skin. I wanted to turn and kiss him on his lips, instead I said nothing; I got up quickly and ran inside. What is wrong with me, I thought. My feelings for Simon were getting stronger and they were definitely not the feelings I should’ve had for my own brother. I felt extremely confused.

  We woke up the next morning to a white Christmas. I helped Tammy prepare the dinner while we sang at the top of our voices to all the Christmas songs on the radio. Later that day we all sat down to a big dinner of roast turkey. After we moved to the living room to open our presents and enjoy glasses of mulled wine which we drank while continuing the festivities.