“I’m not sure what’s going on,” he finally said.
“How does Courtney feel?”
“I haven’t talked to her.”
“How do you feel?” his aunt asked.
“Like I need to talk to her.”
The older woman stood and looked down at him. “Then I suggest you do that.”
Gabe watched her walk to the door. “Aunt Lil?”
She stopped and looked back. “What?”
“Thanks for the pep talk.” And for always noticing him, he added silently.
“It wasn’t much, but you’re so very welcome.” She smiled fondly, then met his gaze without flinching. “And for what it’s worth, Margo would want you to move on with your life and be happy.”
Before he could respond to that, she was gone, and he sighed. His dead wife might want him to be happy, but that was something he didn’t believe would ever happen for him again. And he didn’t want it to.
Gabe did a little more computer work, then left the office. On the way to his rented condo, he went to the drive-through and picked up a chicken dinner for one. When he finally walked into his place, it was after seven. The sound of silence greeted him, followed by a wave of loneliness with a brutal undertow that threatened to sweep him in a direction he didn’t want to go. It was a familiar feeling but had turned deeper and darker since the night Courtney had been here.
He set his chicken meal on the kitchen island then took out his cell phone. After pulling up his contacts, he tapped Courtney’s number and waited. It rang a few times, and he expected to get voice mail, but someone answered.
“Courtney Davidson’s phone.”
“Hi, Ava.” He sounded disgustingly cheerful. Just like a guy who’d almost had sex on his couch with her mom. “How’s math treating you?”
“It sucks.” She sounded like a resentful teen who knew what he’d done.
“Can I help?” Still with the too-cheery voice.
“You can help by telling me what happened with you and my mom.”
“She hasn’t said anything?” he asked hesitantly.
“No. But she’s been acting weird. What’s going on?”
Delete cheerful tone here. “I’m not going to lie to you, Ava.”
“Right,” she said sarcastically.
“I might have messed up with your mom,” he said.
“How?” The tone was hostile, and he preferred sarcasm.
He had no intention of giving her details. “I just need to talk to your mom. Is she home?”
“She’s pouring spaghetti into the colander.”
“Okay. I’ll wait. But will you tell her it’s me?”
There was silence for several moments, long enough for him to wonder if she really would do as requested. Then he heard her say, “Mom, Mr. B is on the phone.”
There were several more long moments before someone spoke. “Gabe?”
“Hi, Courtney.” He blew out a breath then asked, “Are you speaking to me?”
“Of course.”
“Okay. Good.” He felt like an awkward teen, not sure what to say next. “It’s just after the other night—I wasn’t sure if you—” He blew out a breath. “I don’t know exactly what happened.”
“Yeah. Hang on. I’m going into the other room. Ava, will you toss the salad for me?” There was silence on her end for a couple of beats, then she said, “Okay. I can talk now.”
“I just wanted to check in. See how you are.”
“Honestly? I’m still in recovery from the intensity of that kiss. I didn’t expect that with you.”
So he wasn’t the only one who’d felt it. For a split second that pleased him, then he shut down the feeling. “But we’re friends.”
“I’ve never done that with a friend.” There was astonishment in her voice.
“I have to ask. Should I apologize?”
“Absolutely not,” she said vehemently. “It just took me by surprise, that’s all. We were practicing to make it look real, and mission accomplished. When the hormones took over, it got real.”
“Right. So, I have to ask. Do you want to call things off?” Please say no, he thought. He hadn’t been sure about moving forward with this when talking with his aunt, but he was now. He definitely was not ready to end things yet.
“I don’t. Do you?”
“No,” he said. “But where do we go from here?”
“Well, I think kissing class gets an A plus. We now know we can make it look real.” She hesitated for a moment, then cleared her throat. “I wanted to go for it with you. I want to continue our agreement because it’s working, but I need to be smart and safe. I need to visit my doctor and have a serious discussion about birth control.”
Gabe couldn’t help smiling. It was sincere amusement along with profound respect for her blunt, straightforward comment and all it implied. For the first time in a very long time, he was going to have sex.
“I think that’s a very good idea,” he said.
“Right. Let’s be clear. This isn’t love. But with what happened the other night, I think we can say that there’s a definite attraction. And we agreed this would be fun. Sex is fun, but it’s best to be prepared and take precautions. More than a condom.”
“Absolutely.” He was glad this wasn’t FaceTime, because she would see that he was grinning from ear to ear.
“Okay. I have to go. Ava just walked into the room, and she’s got that look on her face that says she’s hungry.”
“Okay. I’ll call you soon.”
“I look forward to it. ’Bye, Gabe.”
He tapped the red stop button on his phone and put it down beside his dinner for one. His appetite had returned with a vengeance. Suddenly he was hungry and had a feeling it wasn’t just about food. Feelings stirred inside him but he understood they were, as Courtney had said, hormones. That explained his sudden change in feelings. He was a guy and he liked her. He also liked sex, and it had been a hell of a long time. Neither of them was looking for anything serious. They could have fun with no worries about the future. That’s all this was.
Chapter Nine
“Are you sure you want to come with us?” Courtney carried her coffee over to the little kitchen table and set it down before sitting in the chair near her daughter’s.
Ava finished chewing a bite of cereal, but her eyes were saying, “Are you kidding me?” When she swallowed, she elaborated with words. “Mom, it’s the zoo! You said Mr. B invited me to go along. Did he change his mind or something?”
“No, sweetie.”
Between her hands she cradled her favorite mug, the one that had the words World’s Best Mom written on it. Courtney felt like a fraud on so many fronts, but particularly that one. Excluding her current situation with Gabe, Courtney had made it a point to tell her daughter the truth. She’d explained in the gentlest possible terms that Adam Nelson, the jerk she’d had the bad judgment to marry, wanted kids, but only if they were his kids, with his DNA. When he proposed, he’d said he wanted to be a father to Ava but he lied and her daughter had been hurt.
After that she was more determined than ever to protect her child. She didn’t believe Gabe would deliberately hurt Ava, and it was really nice of him to include her in today’s outing. But she could be collateral damage in this scheme if they weren’t careful.
Let’s try this again, Courtney thought. “I’m concerned about you, Ava. You could get attached to Gabe after spending time with him. There are no guarantees that he and I will be anything more than friends.”
“He’s my friend, too, so I don’t think it’s a problem.” Ava took another spoonful of cereal and started to chew.
Courtney was trying to put a finer point on this warning without tipping her hand. “I don’t want you to be caught in the middle if there’s a nasty breakup because things take a turn.”
Like sex. Just the thought of it made her girl parts tingle.
Ava was staring at her. “Why are you being this way?”
“What way?”
“So negative. You don’t have an open mind about dating at all. And you always tell me I have to change my attitude. Well, back at you, Mom. It’s like you’re going into this with an exit strategy.”
Wow, since when did this child get so observant? “I just want you to have realistic expectations. This isn’t a cartoon fantasy where we know each other for fifteen minutes and live happily ever after.”
Ava glared. “So, you’re already convinced that things won’t work out.”
Courtney was absolutely certain of it, because neither she nor Gabriel was looking for love. But she was on very thin ice here. “I just want you to be prepared.”
“You mean like our earthquake supplies?” the teen asked.
“If the big one hits, you’ll be very thankful to have something to eat,” Courtney defended. “And yes, that’s what I mean. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. Just in case.”
“Do you like Mr. B at all? Or are you just going out with him because I was on your case?”
The thin ice just cracked, and Courtney was about to fall in. She and Gabe as a legitimately dating couple was a lie, but a face-to-face falsehood offended her maternal code of ethics. It was splitting hairs on the honesty front, but wrong thing, right reason was her defense, and she was sticking to it. She seized on the only question she could answer honestly.
“I like him very much. He’s capable of deep feelings.”
It was a wonderful quality. Unfortunately all those feelings were for the wife he’d lost. It was a shame that a man like him wasn’t willing to put himself out there again. But who was she to point fingers? She was doing the same thing.
“Okay, then.” Ava nodded. “Just give him a chance, Mom. Do you think you can do that?”
Courtney put a hand in her lap and crossed her fingers. “Yes. And he’s going to be here any minute to pick us up. Finish eating and go brush your teeth. I can’t believe I let you have sugar-coated cereal.”
Grinning, Ava stood and pointed to the mug. “Because you’re the world’s best mom.”
“Right,” she scoffed. “Now scoot.”
“I hope he brings the Mercedes.” This child had perfected a wickedly teasing expression.
“So, you’re not going after all?” Courtney teased back.
Laughing, the teen put her bowl in the sink then ran upstairs. Courtney washed up the dishes, then paced nervously as she waited for Gabe to arrive. She was a little uneasy about how very much she was looking forward to seeing him. And a lot uneasy about Ava coming along.
It was one thing to spend time at his parents’ with all the people around for a distraction. Especially the twins. But today it was just the three of them. Could she and Gabe actually pull this off?
They were about to find out.
And then the doorbell rang. Courtney blew out a breath before answering it.
“Hi,” she said.
“You ready?”
“Yes. And Ava will be down in a minute. Come in.” She stepped back to let him pass and sighed as the masculine scent of his cologne drifted by.
“How are you?” he asked.
“Good. You?”
“Fine.” He met her gaze, and there was a smoky sort of look in his eyes for a second. “Feels like I haven’t seen you for a long time.”
“A couple of weeks, I guess.” She knew it had been exactly long enough to see her doctor and be on the pill for a sufficient length of time to not get pregnant. If they did the deed.
There was understanding in his eyes along with a glitter of heat that quickly disappeared. “I can’t believe you’ve never been to the zoo.”
She was glad he’d changed the subject. “What can I say? Disadvantaged childhood.”
“I’m sorry, Court. Didn’t mean to remind you of the bad stuff.”
“No problem.” She waved away the apology. “It’s in the past.”
“Is it?”
But just then footsteps sounded on the stairs as Ava came down. “Hey, Mr. B.”
“Hi, kid. So you’re finally ready to do this?”
“Yes.” Her eyes sparkled with mischief. “Did you bring the Benz? Mom volunteered to stay home.”
“No such luck. I borrowed a car again.”
Fitting, Courtney thought, since she was sort of a borrowed “date.” And so was Gabe.
“All set?” Gabe looked at Ava, then her. When they both nodded, he said, “Let’s go.”
Courtney was happy to have her daughter along and avoid awkward silences on the drive. No time to think about that hot kiss and what had almost happened. Ava was in a good mood, excited to see the animals. What with being a single mom, Courtney was aware that her daughter had had to grow up faster than kids who had two parents. It was great to see her acting like a kid.
After parking, they walked to the entrance, where Gabe bought admission tickets and was given a map of the zoo and the botanical gardens along with a brochure about the attractions.
He glanced through it. “If we hurry, we can make the giraffe feeding. It only happens at certain times.”
“Oh my God!” Ava’s eyes went wide. “Mom, can we go?”
“Yes.” She looked up at Gabe. “Okay?”
“It would take a stronger man than me to say no to those faces. But there’s no time to waste, ladies. It starts in a few minutes. We have to hustle.” He checked the map, then pointed. “That way.”
They headed in the right direction, and Ava set a swift pace, nearly running. Courtney and Gabe walked side by side a little behind her. When their hands brushed, she felt it all the way to her toes, and that was before he spontaneously linked his fingers with hers. It seemed natural, but of course it was just for show. Somehow she needed to get that message to the parts of her that were squealing with delight.
Ava arrived at the giraffe enclosure just a little before them. “Hurry, it’s about to start. There’s a five-dollar fee, but you get to feed them.”
Courtney started to pull out her wallet, but Gabe was already handing the park attendant some bills. Inside, one of the animal care workers gave out branches of acacia leaves. Gabe pushed his into Ava’s hands, and she smiled up at him. The animals were separated from them by a sturdy metal fence, and when the teen held out the leaves, a big, graceful head leaned over the top and munched on them.
“Mom, look at me!”
“I see, sweetie. I’ll get a picture.” She pulled out her cell phone and swiped the screen for the camera. After centering Ava and the adorable long-lashed, long-necked creature, she tapped the white button. “Got it.”
“I’ll get one of you with her,” Gabe offered.
“Thanks.” How thoughtful was that? She handed the phone to him and walked over to her daughter. They stood on either side of the giraffe, and he got the photo.
It was crowded, and people were waiting their turn with the charming and charismatic animals. They moved out of the way and went to stand beside Gabe.
Thirty minutes in giraffe heaven had Ava beaming up at him, hero worship shining in her eyes. “Thank you for bringing me today.”
“You’re welcome. But we have a lot more zoo to get through,” he said.
“If I don’t see another thing, I still had a great time. That was completely awesome.”
“It really was,” Courtney told him.
“Why don’t I get a picture of you guys by the giraffes,” Ava offered.
“That’s all right,” Courtney said. “We do have a lot more to look at—”
“That’s a great idea, Ava.” Gabe slid her a challenging look.
“Just do it, Mom.”
“Okay.” She handed over the
phone.
Gabe put his hand to the small of her back and guided her to the metal enclosure. Everywhere his fingers touched set her on fire and made her want to lean into him. All she could think about was sex.
Ava held up the camera. “Got it. One more.”
With an all clear, Courtney moved away quickly, as if she’d been burned. Which she had. They stayed with the giraffes until the animal care workers closed down the enclosure. Ava was disappointed there wasn’t more time.
“There’s still lots of stuff to see.” Gabe was trying to make it better. “What do you want to do now?”
“Can we go to the petting zoo?” the teen asked.
“Of course.”
He referred to the map, pointed them in the right direction and off they went. It wasn’t too far, and when Ava saw the baby goats and sheep, she squealed with excitement. She hurried ahead of them and went through the gate into the pen to give the enthusiastic animals some love. When she found the brushes for untangling an animal’s matted hair Courtney sighed.
She looked up at Gabe. “We’re going to be here for a while.”
“I kind of figured that, judging by her reaction.”
“You don’t mind?”
“Absolutely not. She obviously loves animals and is having a good time.” He leaned against the low fence, settling in for the duration. “We’re in no hurry. No schedule today,” he assured her.
Courtney watched the sheep and goats crowd in around her daughter as she brushed one of the babies. “She wants a dog, but with both of us gone so much, I don’t think it’s fair to an animal. Maybe a cat, though.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
She met his gaze but couldn’t see what he was thinking with his eyes covered by the dark, sexy aviator sunglasses. “Yes. But I reserve the right not to answer.”
“This is an easy one, I think.” He smiled. “Did something happen between you and Ava before I picked you up?”
“Why do you ask?”
“I’m not sure. You seemed a little subdued, I guess.”
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