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They Didn't Teach THIS in Worm School!

Page 7

by Simone Lia


  166

  Laurence didn’t say

  anything for a while.

  Then he said,

  “That’s the

  nicest thing

  that anyone

  has ever said

  to me.”

  I felt a warm

  glow. I’d said something nice without even

  trying or lying.

  Laurence looked at me and said, “I thought

  that I’d only be happy if I moved to Lake Nakuru

  in Kenya and made friends with flamingos. But

  these last few days, I’ve been happier than I’ve

  ever been before. I’m not in Kenya, and I’m not a

  flamingo. But I didn’t need to be a flamingo; I just

  needed a friend. And you’re my friend. Thank you,

  friend.”

  “That’s OK, friend,” I said.

  This conversation was getting to be too much

  for me. I had that soda-in-the-head feeling again.

  It was too embarrassing for us to look at each

  other, and I was beginning to feel dizzy and sick.

  We both stared straight ahead.

  A pigeon was standing on a sandwich that had

  fallen on the ground. He pecked at it hurriedly

  before any of the other pigeons spotted it. It was

  an egg salad sandwich.

  “Do you want to come to my

  house for dinner later?”

  Laurence asked.

  168

  “What will you be making?” I asked.

  I wondered what the pigeon would be having

  for dinner. Maybe it would be another sandwich.

  “Mashed potatoes.”

  Mashed potatoes are one of my favorites.

  “Yes, please, Laurence,” I said.

  It didn’t take us three days to fly back from

  “Lake Nakuru National Park” to Laurence’s

  house, but it might have if Tanya hadn’t spotted

  us as we took off. We had been about to fly

  in the wrong direction.

  Chapter

  Thirteen

  170

  Tanya ended up coming for dinner, and

  Laurence invited his neighbors Lizzie,

  Bernard, and Shakira — and that pigeon.

  His name was Sebastian.

  Laurence wasn’t used to having

  dinner parties. He started panicking

  in the kitchen and then ended up

  making too many mashed potatoes.

  The extra potato was enough to make a

  mashed-potato bed. Laurence slept in it

  that night and said that it was the most

  comfortable bed in the world.

  172

  When I met Laurence for the first time, he had

  his beak wide open, ready to eat me. I didn’t stop

  to wonder if he might be kind and thoughtful

  and have a penchant for cheese-and-mustard

  sandwiches. No, I just wanted to get as far away

  as I could from the beaky fluffball. I was perfectly

  content with my life, hidden under the ground,

  digging worm tunnels in the dark.

  And when Laurence

  met me, he didn’t stop to

  wonder if I might be the

  sort of worm who would

  care about the things that

  he cared about. No, he just

  saw a tasty breakfast.

  We were very lucky

  that we’d had a conversation about our hobbies.

  If it hasn’t been for that, then we wouldn’t have

  discovered that we could do things together

  that were impossible on our own.

  173

  And if Laurence hadn’t met me, he would

  probably still be at home, sitting on his sofa like a

  blob of mashed potatoes and thinking about his

  dreams but not doing anything about them. All

  of his life he had dreamed about faraway places.

  With Laurence, I can fly.

  w

  o

  o

  -

  h

  o

  o!

  It was only when he met me and we left his

  birdhouse for Lake Nakuru that he became

  a courageous adventurer.

  In the end, we didn’t make it to Lake

  Nakuru, or to France, or even farther than

  three miles away from the birdhouse.

  But we did have an adventure. We

  discovered those transmission towers, and

  that was probably just as good as seeing the

  Eiffel Tower. We escaped

  from a cooking

  pot and rode

  a giraffe.

  175

  Laurence did a dance in front of everyone

  without worrying about what anyone thought

  about him. He even rescued a worm, Gwenda —

  who didn’t really want to be rescued, but it was

  the thought that counted.

  I chanted in a circle with weird worms

  while wearing a hat made of twigs on my

  head, and we both slept out under the burnt-

  sausage sky, sharing an itchy blanket.

  One of my favorite things about Laurence

  is that I can tell him the thoughts in my head

  and he doesn’t say “What a ridiculous idea!”

  or anything awful like that.

  The other day I told him about how I

  sometimes daydream about riding a bicycle

  with a freshly baked baguette in the front

  basket. He didn’t say anything. I thought that

  he’d fallen asleep, but he hadn’t, because the

  very next day he came to my house with a

  big surprise.

  176

  He had an actual bicycle for me, with a basket

  on the front! It wasn’t even my birthday. I love it

  so much.

  I did try to ride it, but it’s pretty hard riding

  a bicycle when you’re a worm. So, to help me

  out, Laurence rides it and I sit in the basket and

  pretend to be the freshly baked baguette.

  Sometimes J-Peg the squirrel comes to visit,

  and she rides the bike and Laurence sits in the

  basket and pretends to be the baguette.

  177

  Even though Laurence is a bird and I am a

  worm, he doesn’t see me as breakfast anymore. He

  sees me as his friend. I think that’s why he doesn’t

  seem to notice the things that I can’t do well. He

  just sees the good things in me, things that even

  I don’t always see. Maybe what he sees is the real

  me, the real Marcus. I don’t know. . . . But I do

  know that Laurence is probably the kindest living

  bird on the planet, and he makes me want to try

  to be a better worm.

  It’s hard for me to be as kind and nice as he is,

  and I keep doing it wrong, but then I remember

  Robert the Bruce and his unusual little friend who

  happened to be a spider. It reminds me that if at

  first I don’t succeed, then I should try, try again.

  Thanks

  With special thanks to everyone at Walker Books.

  Especially my wonderful editor, Lizzie, for pulling

  out all the stops to make this book happen, for her

  infectious laughter, brilliantly funny ideas, dedication,

  and all-round good-egg-ness. Thanks to Linas, who

  also edited and is a joy and a hoot to work with.

  To David and Jacky for patiently putting the words

  and pictures together.

  Thanks to Mirielle, Frances, Mickey, Alice, Ja
ne,

  and Angel for big hearts, for being open, and for

  laughing in the right places. You all helped create the

  bird that looks like a chicken.

  And extra massive thanks for the unwavering love,

  care, and support of Tim, who has always believed in

  me and that no matter what happens, like Laurence

  and Marcus, together we can fly.

  About the Author

  Award-winning comic artist Simone Lia began

  painting and drawing in her dad’s toolshed at the age

  of thirteen, before going on to study at the University

  of Brighton and then the Royal College of Art. She

  has written comic strips for children and adults

  for numerous publications, including the Observer,

  with “Things That I’ve Learnt,” “The Chip and Bean

  Quiz” in the Independent on Sunday, and “Sausage

  and Carrots” in the DFC. She has also published two

  graphic novels: Fluffy and Please God, Find Me a

  Husband. Her work has been exhibited across Europe,

  including in the Tate Britain. Simone Lia lives and

  works in London.

 

 

 


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