Only a Glow

by Nichelle Rae

  I looked at him confused and wondered why he seemed to know so much. Then it dawned on me that Beldorn was a Wizard—another race my father had taught me about. Though he didn’t teach me very much about them, because he couldn’t teach me very much about them. Wizards were complex beings and each one was as different as the next.

  Beldorn sat in silence for a few minutes, in deep thought, before he spoke again. “Your father asked me to teach you, though I’m a bit confused as to what he expected me to teach you. You already know everything you need about your gift. You know it must be kept a secret, you know—”

  “Yes! And it’s such a well-kept secret, isn’t it?” I interrupted heatedly. “For instance, you, Ortheldo, and Isadith know about it. Who else will find out? Why not tell all the beings in Casdanarus!” I cried.

  “Palponer, Isadith, Ortheldo, and myself are the only beings who know. Your secret will not leave the Salynns or me. It’s too important that it be kept a secret.”

  “Palponer?” I cried. “Who is he, and why does he know? And why do any of you care if it’s kept secret? Its secrecy is important to my father and me, for our own reasons. What difference does it make to you?” He stared blankly at the opposite wall, as if he wasn’t listening to me. I started to grind my teeth.

  My father and I had our reasons, all right. We didn’t want anyone to know because The White Warrior was the most hated being on earth. No one would want it revealed that they had the ‘gift’ that once belonged to ‘the greatest coward in the history of Casdanarus,’ as it was written in some of those history books. The ‘gift’ was shamed and spat upon by all. I didn’t want to be shamed and spat upon just because, beyond my control, it was passed to me. Why my father and I had to bare this burden, I’ll never know.

  “Palponer is the Lord of Galad Kas,” Beldorn finally answered, ignoring my other questions.

  I was so frustrated. My father said to keep it secret, and now Beldorn was saying keep it secret. If its secrecy was so important to everyone, then why did everyone know about it?

  I looked away dreading to ask the next question, “What’s become of Ortheldo?”

  There was a pause. “We don’t know.” Beldorn replied sympathetically. “We’ve found no trace of him.”

  I squeezed my eyes shut, and that strange burning feeling returned to them. I knew I was about to cry. I had lost all that was familiar in my world. Ortheldo was the only thing left I could call home, and now he was gone. I suddenly felt very cold and alone.

  I drew my knees up and curled into a ball to keep out the bitter cold of emptiness. I hoped beyond hope that he was okay. My Ortheldo, who I had thought of as only a dueling partner, had truly been my best friend, my only friend. I never got the chance to tell him how important he was to me, how much he had meant to me. He and my father had been my whole world. I missed him and wanted him here. I needed his comfort and his handsome face. I needed to hear his voice tell me everything would be okay.

  As a droplet of water slide down my cheek, I heard a thoughtful hum come from the Wizard. I snapped my eyes open and scowled at him. “What?” I barked. Hadn’t he ever seen anyone cry before?

  “How often do you cry?”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Why?”

  “Because the White Warrior cries white tears.”

  Confused, I touched the teardrop on my face and looked at it. It was indeed white water. This should have shocked me, but why? If white fire exists, why not white water, as well?

  “I would counsel that you avoid crying at all costs, but if you find yourself in a situation where you must cry, hide your face well. You can’t give away your secret,” Beldorn said.

  I wanted to cry a river of tears for my dear Ortheldo, but decided I’d better get in the habit of fighting away any teardrops. I didn’t want anyone to know of the horrible magic I possessed. And supposedly it was imperative that it remain a secret for more than my own benefit.

  “Well, Azrel, you need your rest,” Beldorn said, rising from his chair. “We will stay in Galad Kas for a few months, allowing you to mend and the winter outside of this place to end. Then I will take you traveling for a while and teach you what I can.” He started to make his way out of my room. “After that I will take you to The Pitt, where you will live with your stepfather, mother, and brother.”

  “Brother?” I asked in shock as my head snapped toward him.

  Beldorn stopped at the archway and turned to look at me. “Yes, you have a younger brother.”

  My heart stopped. “What?” I had a what? A brother?

  Beldorn saw the look on my face and laughed. “I see you are intrigued.”

  “I have a brother? I’ve never had a brother before.” I said, sounding rather ridiculous.

  Beldorn chuckled. “Yes, I know.” He smiled down at me. “Rabryn is his name, and he’s anxious to meet you.”

  My eyes went wide as butterflies seemed to erupt in my stomach. “He knows I exist?” I breathed. “He knows I’m coming?”

  Beldorn nodded. “As does your mother,” he said. “You’ve been out cold for two weeks here. In that time, I traveled to The Pitt and told them of your coming. Rabryn was just as surprised as you are, and very excited just the same.” A thoughtful look came over his face. “That’s the impression I got anyway, when he started jumping around the house singing your name.”

  I laughed loudly. I don’t think I ever laughed so hard in my existence, but the image of a small boy I’d never met before jumping around and singing my name made me laugh so hard my sides felt as if they would split open. I felt so strange. Why was this brother, my brother, such an exciting thing to me? I had a brother. I was a sister!

  Beldorn smiled at my outburst. “Do you want to know more about him, or do you wish to be surprised?”

  I composed myself and grinned. “I would love to hear more about him. Would you mind?”

  “Not at all,” Beldorn said as he sat back down in the chair. “I will also tell you more of your mother and their way of life. It’s much different then you’re used to.”

  I grinned and listened to all that Beldorn had to say about The Pitt, my mother, and my brother…Rabryn.

  After two months passed Spring started to bloom outside of Galas Kas. Beldorn decided it was time for us to leave. I almost didn’t want to leave. It was so lovely and peaceful here. Though I often avoided the Salynns that called this place home, I enjoyed their presence. Occasionally, I did mingle among them. I loved watching them and listening to their songs and old tales. Unfortunately, because I was so used to solitude, it felt strange to be around so many beings at one time, and I often went off by myself.

  Isadith was the only Salynn I got relatively close to. We spent the most amount of time together. At her request, I even taught her some swordplay, showing her some techniques that my father taught me. She seemed to genuinely enjoy my teachings, which I thought odd for a graceful, female Salynn. Yet I felt a sense of pride being able to teach Isadith, who was thousands of years old, something she didn’t know.

  When we simulated duels, I thought of Ortheldo. It burned my heart that I didn’t know what had happened to him, and it burned even more that I might never find out. I missed his pretty eyes and his bright, warm, handsome smile. I missed his voice telling me what a great warrior I would be someday and, when things got tough, how much faith he had that I could do the impossible.

  In Galad Kas, when I wasn’t teaching Isadith, I spent most of my time alone or with Beldorn. I learned to respect him and even befriended him. But I couldn’t bear to lose another person close to me, so I kept a good distance between us. I think he sensed this and left me alone quite a bit, usually just when I needed solitude.

  As I packed my weapons and belongings for travel, Isadith came to my “section,” as I fondly came to call the rooms. “Hello, Azrel,” she said kindly.

  “Hello,” I replied and returned her smile, though I’m sure it was as transparent as the glassless archways around the room.


  “I wanted to see you before you left. I have a gift for you.”

  “A gift?” Confused, I turned toward her. “Why?”

  She stood in front of me holding a deep-red Salynn cloth across both her palms. “It isn’t much, but I thought you could use it.”

  I took the gift from her long, slender hands and opened it. In the cloth lay a beautiful Salynnian knife with a small strap and hilt. My eyes went wide at the sight of the gorgeous, perfectly shaped blade. But the short white strap was too small to pass as a belt. I was a bit confused about what to do with it.

  Isadith took the gift into her hands. “I had it made for you. You attach it to the top part of your leg where you can have discreet access to it.”

  She wrapped the strong leather Salynn strap around my left thigh and fastened it, positioning the hilt on the outside of my leg, then handed me the knife. I’d learned from my father that Salynnian goods were very powerful and masterfully crafted, so this blade would most certainly come in handy. I studied the metal and noticed that the slight curve of the foot-long silver blade bore lovely embroideries. The markings were words in the Salynn script.

  “A star shall shine on the hour of victory for the mighty warrior,” I read allowed in the common tongue, then smiled at her. “Thank you, Isadith.”

  She smiled back. “I won’t hinder you any longer. Beldorn is waiting.” With that she left my section. I slipped the beautiful blade into the hilt attached to my leg and finished packing with a heavy heart.

  There was a great gathering of Salynns who wanted to see Beldorn and me off. They all wished us well as we packed our supplies on Beldorn’s horse, Lómarandil. She was a beautiful stallion of silver coat and a light gray main. Before coming here I’d never seen a horse in the flesh, and I never thought any creature could be as beautiful and as powerful as a horse.

  After we finished loading up our traveling gear, Beldorn mounted. I hesitated and gazed at the ground, again pushing away the fear of going into the unknown. My situation was frightening, but I knew I had no choice.

  From behind me, I felt a pair of hands rest on my shoulders. I looked back to see Lord Palponer smiling down at me. I turned to face him. I’d only met him a few times during my stay, but they were always lengthy and pleasant meetings. He never aged, like all Salynns, and his complexion was just as fair as his kin’s. Though he too was thousands of years old, he didn’t look much older than me; his face was slender and youthful. His white Sallybreath Flowers were almost invisible against his straight white hair, which cascaded past his shoulders, accenting the golden crown he wore on his brow. His eyes were a lovely pale gray color, and kind, making me feel safe and comfortable. But they also had the potential to be stone cold and hard as steel if the need occurred. His white robes swished around his feet with each graceful move, and the string of pearls he wore around his waist dangled down the front of his robes, truly giving him a lordly air.

  “Farewell, Azrel,” he said softly, placing a hand on the top of my head in a gesture of blessing. “May your paths be green and the breeze blow on your back.”

  I put my hand upon my chest and bowed low at the waist to him, swallowing my pride to show respect to the one who gave me a place to mend. Though he had been present when my father fled from battle, he didn’t scorn me or treat me badly for what I was.

  “Thank you for everything, my Lord,” I said.

  I mounted in front of a now rather impressed Beldorn, and we said farewell. The Wizard then squeezed his legs against Lómarandil, and she leaped forward into a soft gallop straight toward the water’s edge. My stomach knotted; did Beldorn plan to make her swim to the shore? But just as we hit the edge, we started galloping over the water. With eyes wide, I looked down as we rode over the surface on an invisible bridge. The calm water under Lómarandil sparkled and rippled in the sun, but her hooves clopped loudly as if she rode over a solid surface. I was impressed! Salynn magic was no doubt very powerful and wonderful. What a great protection measure for Galad Kas—an invisible bridge.

  “The bridge moves as well,” Beldorn informed me, reading my thoughts again. “It is constantly circling the island so enemies can never guess where it may be.”

  I nodded, though I barely heard him. I was glad Lómarandil was under me and Beldorn’s arm was around my stomach. Otherwise I might not have been able to cross due to my new, deeply rooted fear of water. I could never, ever cross this bridge on foot. Not when the only thing I could see under me was the water itself!

  I looked over my shoulder for a last glance at Galad Kas. That’s when I saw Isadith standing high upon a branch at the edge of her magical land. She raised her hand to me in our final farewell. Then, with a longing and heavy heart, I faced forward again and rode into the unknown.

  Beldorn and I traveled for over a year. He took me from one corner of Western Casdanarus to the next, showing me some of the realms I’d learned about from pictures and books. Their beauty was so much greater in person. The mountains alone were the most magnificent creations on the Light Gods’ green earth that I could ever have hoped to see! They were massive formations, larger than life, and I loved them.

  I really enjoyed our travels. Maybe it was just because I was only accustomed to being in one place my entire life, but I felt free and glorious. Beldorn taught me much in our time together. I learned a lot of good things and a lot of bad things, too; things concerning Hathum, the creator of The Nameless One. He was the evil that I was meant to destroy. Beldorn often went on and on about my sword and my magic and the role I must play in the future. I wanted to forget about that blasted sword—which is why I only half-listened to him, and instead absorbed myself in the beauty of the world while he talked about it.

  We traveled to many places. We didn’t see all of them, of course; that would take years. Beldorn said some places weren’t pleasant to visit anyway, or even possible to visit, like Spar Ridges and the Ruin of West Godel. But we managed to see quite a bit, and most of it was pleasant.

  I wondered, though, that if evil awaited me in my future, shouldn’t I know about evil realms, as well? But alas, we avoided those whenever possible. Most of them were in Eastern Casdanarus.

  “It’s good to think of that,” Beldorn commented when I asked him about not seeing any evil realms. “It is good to keep your friends close but your enemies closer. Yet we don’t have time. You’ll learn of these Shadow lands eventually.”

  I didn’t like the sound of that.

  We came across many towns and cities from the simple to the exquisite, and all were different and special in their own way. I saw many races that I’d never seen before. There were creatures in some places that I didn’t believe existed during my teachings, until I saw them with my own eyes. I didn’t interact much with these beings much, but I did explore their lands thoroughly.

  However, Queen Sauryavia of Fayithjen Forrest, a land that sat just on the outskirts of the dangerous and secluded Miick, wouldn’t tolerate my preference for solitude. She insisted I spend as much time with her as I could spare. This made me quite uncomfortable. Though she was always kind, my guard was up against her simply because she convinced me to sing for her. I’d only ever sung songs with my father and Ortheldo, and it was obvious I didn’t put my heart into my performance for her, but she applauded anyway.

  Despite having my guard up, I became relatively close to the Queen and eventually felt some level of comfort with her. It wasn’t heartbreaking to leave, however, since we only stayed a week. But leaving any familiar place and going off into the unknown was hard for me. It probably always would be.

  One day Beldorn and I crossed Blood River and we entered the east side of Casdanarus for the first time. I can’t say I was comfortable here by any means, but it didn’t seem any more Shadow-touched than the west. It was quieter, however, which had me on edge for our entire journey through the region.

  Two days after entering the east, I saw the first sign of intelligent life. It was in the form of a large host of moun
ted figures riding toward us. I narrowed my eyes against the bright sun—or perhaps at the brightness of their armor. It had to be the armor because the metal they wore shined brightly in a rainbow of movement. The array of colors was breathtaking! No two colors were the same in the large fleet, which I found very interesting. I didn’t know so many colors existed. I didn’t know metal could be dyed either.

  “Beldorn, who are they?” I asked.

  He looked out over the plain. “Ah, those my dear are the Gleo`gwyns.”

  “Gleo`gwyns?” I thought about that for a moment. “That’s Salynnian for ‘Metallic Riders,’ isn’t it?”

  “Indeed.”

  I nodded. It seemed fitting. I vaguely recalled my father mentioning them. “Are they Salynns or men?”

  “They are a mix of very good men and Salynns. They do nothing but ride the lands and help any traveler in need. They know much about woodlands, plants, and beasts, even more then you might, Azrel.”

  “Travelers in need?” I asked.

  “They can bring food if travelers are hungry, water if they are thirsty, aid if they are injured, or protection if they are attacked by an enemy. They often tend to village emergencies, such as a fire or famine, if a village has a dry season. In ancient days, they were mainly used for carrying messages for soldiers of Goodness because they, and their horses, have unnatural abilities to endure long, hard rides with almost zero rest. They can make extremely speedy retrievals and returns.”

  “Protection? They don’t seem like they could be violent, even to protect someone.”

  “They are very peaceful people, but if the need occurs they will kill to protect an innocent traveler or merchant. When they win a battle, they burn the bodies of slain enemies. It’s how they remind foes about their battle prowess, which is formidable, despite how peaceable they seem.”

  As the Gleo`gwyns passed us across the distance, the one I assumed to be their leader, who wore shiny, deep-red armor and a crown of what looked like leaves and berries, gave Beldorn a little nod in greeting. Beldorn waved in reply, and we rode on, continuing to explore the lands.