My Life From Hell

by Tellulah Darling

  “The less people know, the better,” I hedged.

  Demeter gave a familiar grumble and smoothed her hair. A gesture I’d seen from Felicia many times.

  My heart twisted.

  “Now is not the time to be coy,” she said. “I want to be there. To make sure your father understands how his promises and lies have brought about his defeat.”

  I was lost. There was nothing in Persephone’s memories about Zeus having promised anything.

  Demeter’s lips were tight. “He wants it all. He will have nothing. No one. You think she will want him when he is no longer ruler? He will see how I was the only one who truly loved him, but it will be too late.”

  The bitterness in her voice stunned me. That’s what this was all about? The fact that Zeus wouldn’t leave Hera for Demeter? The fury of a woman scorned?

  She had been betrayed in love and now she expected me to do the same thing to Kai? This had to stop. “Mama,” I beseeched her, “let it go. He’s not worth it.” But even as I said it, I knew she wouldn’t listen. It had always been about him. Even my abduction—Persephone’s abduction—was about making him notice her. It was the only reason she cared so much.

  I was losing it. I felt like Persephone was blindly taking over. Not a voice I had made manifest, but a personality alive and well and righteously pissed off. She dwarfed me with her fury, and I no longer knew where she began and I ended.

  Rage and hopelessness and destruction. She was me and I was her and Tartarus worked its oily evils upon us both.

  “He is everything.” Demeter’s words, combined with the cold look she gave me, allowed me, Sophie to regain the upper hand. “I won’t betray Kyrillos,” I said. The words were thick in my mouth. Almost impossible to speak. Persephone didn’t want me to say them and Demeter didn’t want to hear them.“There has to be another way.” One where we all got out of this without any collateral damage. I twisted my fingers, welcoming the tight pain.

  “You will do as you promised.”

  My ears rang with Persephone’s howling, her grief and pain swallowing me completely. “You’re drowning in hate.” I wasn’t sure if I was speaking to Persephone or Demeter.

  Demeter flicked me a contemptuous glance. “Don’t be ridiculous. I love him. But he doesn’t know how to love. Which is why you and I will defeat him. Then we will have each other.” She bestowed a smile on me that promised sunshine and happily-ever-after as a loving family.

  It was all a lie.

  Because most of these gods didn’t understand love. For them, it was all selfish passion. Not the glorious connection that humans immortalized in books and songs and movies. That was about giving yourself freely and willingly.

  I wanted that scary free fall where your heart is in someone else’s hands and theirs in yours. Instead of making you weak, it was the most precious, most secure place to be.

  Most gods couldn’t see that. For them, love was only allowed from a position of power. And any hurt would be paid back tenfold with ultimate destruction. They had it so wrong.

  But I had no clue what to do, other than what Persephone had always done. I put a smile on my face and said, “I want you to be happy.” At least Demeter would think I was still in line with her plans.

  Demeter’s expression softened as she took my words for agreement. “My girl.” She pressed a hand to my cheek. “Go back now. Before you are missed.”

  “But—”

  Demeter kissed my forehead. “It will all work out fine.”

  I hesitated but, at her small nod, gave a final hug and headed back toward the door out of Tartarus. I couldn’t ignore the feeling in my gut. It wasn’t going to be fine at all.

  On the bright side, every step away from the despondency of Tartarus made me feel lighter, until I was practically skipping my way along the cobblestones back to the palace. Granted, it may have been kind of a manic lightness. After my encounters with Demeter and Hades, I was a mess.

  I laughed, partially in amusement at how wrung out I felt, and partially in relief at being far away from that place.

  “I like to hear you laugh.”

  I spun around to find Kai sitting on a low branch of a tree. His grin was so full of tenderness that my insides began a happy patter. Until I remembered that those feelings were for her. That sobered me up. I straightened and adopted my best pleasant tone.

  Yeah, okay, no. I didn’t do any of that.

  Seriously. I was a sad sad case. I stared at him, drinking him in. Not that I needed to since every detail was burned into my brain. From his eyes, to his voice, to the tiny scar on his hand.

  My ribcage tightened. My breathing constricted. This was killing me. I needed Kai to know me. Maybe, if things were all honeymoon happy between us in the real world, I could have sucked this up, and we could laugh about it later. But back there, we were still working through the very betrayal that I was desperately trying to avoid here. Everything was still so fragile between us.

  I dropped my head. My energy zapped.

  Kai dropped to the ground, moving so silently that I didn’t even realize he’d come to stand next to me until I felt his hand splay across my belly. I leaned into his warmth. Into his strength.

  He tilted my head up with his finger. “I prepared a picnic for us.”

  The sun slanted down on his dark locks, making a halo around his head. His magnificence in this moment temporarily soothed even Persephone’s clawing animosity.

  Yeah, she loved him too.

  I reached out for him, not knowing if I was driving this train, or if she was.

  Kai beamed at me like I’d just handed him Christmas. “Beautiful love.” He took my hand. “Let me adore you.”

  It was tender and romantic and made me feel like I’d been doused in cold water.

  Because Kai, my Kai, would never in a million years say that to me. Not without both of us laughing. It wasn’t us.

  I didn’t want it to be us.

  I wanted that arrogant sly boy who could match wits and mouthiness with me. Who seemed perpetually amused and annoyed by me, and couldn’t stay away. I put my hand on his chest, emboldened by the wariness in his eyes. Yeah, Persephone wasn’t a “make the first move” kind of girl.

  I clutched Kai’s shirt, the soft fabric spilling through my fingers. I knew this was madness. But some deeper, essential part of me needed to be recognized. I hoped that maybe I could spark a connection that would make him see who he was really with.

  Me.

  I didn’t want to be her anymore. I leaned forward and gently bit his lip.

  His body jerked and his breath hitched.

  I pulled back slightly, my body vibrating as he jerked me back against him.

  Remember me! I held his gaze and pushed the thought with all my might. I swallowed, my pulse kicking up as I saw that wild darkness in his eyes. Then I kissed him as hard as I could, willing him to know me in every touch.

  Kai devoured me. There was no other word for it. It was like the dam between us had broken. His arm tightened around me, holding me in place against the length of his body, while he kissed me over and over again.

  This may have been a new dynamic for them, but gawd was it awesome for me. I was in sensory overload heaven: the fullness of his lips, the possessiveness of his hands, and his unique scent that was my own personal aphrodisiac.

  I shifted closer to him, whimpering when he broke contact. Heart racing, breath heaving, I looked at him and saw my questioning mirrored in his eyes.

  But not the good questions like, “Do I get more of that?” and “How soon?”

  Kai stared at me like he couldn’t figure me out.

  Of course he couldn’t. Because I was acting like myself and he had no idea I, Sophie, existed. I closed my eyes, blinking back a furious wetness. Then I shoved at his chest hard and brushed past him.

  “You’re leaving?” He sounded incredulous.

  I nodded, hurrying off because I didn’t trust myself to speak. Besides, what was I going to
say? “Every time I kiss you and you don’t remember that I’m actually a seventeen-year-old human who happened to get your dead girlfriend’s essence stuffed inside her, a part of me wants to die?”

  Yeah, right.

  “Goddess—” he began, sounding exceedingly annoyed.

  I whirled, scowling. “Do NOT call me that.” That was Kai’s name for me. I could take all the Greek endearments he wanted to throw at Persephone, but no way did I want to hear him call her “Goddess.” I couldn’t handle it.

  I broke into a run.

  Kai didn’t follow.

  I hadn’t really expected him to.

  I ran out of steam back by the shores of the Akherousian lake. I strode into the water, not even bothering to kick off my sandals or hitch up my dress. I glared at the reflection of Persephone’s perfect face.

  I smacked at the water, and watched her ripple. “Damn it! I am Sophie Bloom.” Smack! “I am Sophie Bloom.” Smack!

  I think the technical term for my watery assault was hysteria. Every time I looked down and saw her face staring back at me, I felt disconnected. My skin prickled with the fear of not belonging in my own body.

  Every time I shouted my name, I felt more and more depersonalized in the face of the unyielding reality of her, well, face. My emotional turmoil reached a fever pitch and I was utterly unmoored.

  My peripheral vision faded and I was thrust back into my vision.

  The rock on which I stood rose up, molding around my legs to entomb me. With growing horror, I watched it become a box to encase my entire body.

  The pomegranate tree had burned to an ashy skeleton that threatened to crumble into nothingness.

  John Lennon sang louder and more insistently but he was wrong. This wasn’t love. This was getting buried alive.

  There was a grinding noise and I watched wild-eyed as a heavy stone lid swung shut over me. I pushed against it with all my strength, but my arms bowed uselessly against it.

  The world went black.

  Fifteen

  I came to on the grass. Prometheus sat beside me, watching me warily. “Want to talk about it?”

  I shook my head, my limbs shaky. Revisiting my entombment was the last thing I wanted to do. I curled into myself instead, trickles of anxious sweat beading down my spine. “Why are you doing this?” I blurted.

  “Why are you?”

  Because Persephone is crazy with rage and wants to take everyone down didn’t seem like an appropriate response.

  Whatever Prometheus thought he saw in my expression made him chuckle. “I know you hate Zeus and Hades.” He shrugged. “Fine by me since it suits my purposes.”

  He’d nailed my feelings for those two, and I was happy to let him think that was what had set off my hysteria. “I know your agenda,” I said. “You want to save humanity. But why?” Here was Prometheus, willing to talk to me in a way that Theo wouldn’t. Or maybe he just found it too hard after everything he’d been through.

  Prometheus’ dark eyes were wistful. “Wouldn’t any parent do whatever they had to do to keep their kids safe? I was there for the birth of mankind. I nurtured them with the gift of fire and watched them achieve beautiful impossible things.” He wrapped his finger around a dandelion stem. “Terrible things, too. But so many of those, as misguided and immoral as they were, came from a place of hope. Of believing in a better tomorrow and fighting to the death to achieve it.”

  “You don’t want the gods messing with that,” I said.

  His expression hardened. “I don’t want gods killing humans in the name of bloated egos and power plays because they fail to see their worth. I want humanity left alone to succeed or fail on its own. That is their right.” He yanked the weed from the ground and flung it aside.

  “But,” I fumbled for a way to say this delicately, “you already paid a price. Being chained to the rock just for giving them fire. Imagine the consequences if we fail this time.”

  His smile dazzled me. “Which is why you won’t.”

  There it was. The pure faith that connected this Titan and my human friend. “How can you be so sure?”

  “Because you are prophesied.”

  Huh? I was confused. In this enchantment, Cassie hadn’t dropped her “one above one below” prediction yet. I plucked a wet strand of grass from my leg, searching for a way to have Prometheus clarify without giving away knowledge I shouldn’t even have.

  “Why do you think Zeus let you stay here?” Prometheus waved a dismissive hand. “If he’d wanted you out, he would have marshaled all of Olympus to bring you back. He knew it was foretold that one of his children would overthrow him. It was a closely guarded secret.”

  My mouth was dry. I couldn’t believe that Theo had never mentioned this. I mean, sure, it made sense, explained why he’d been willing to lose his powers over me. But still. You’d think it might have come up in conversation. “You found out about it.”

  Prometheus nodded. “And more. Zeus was never entirely sure which of his children it was going to be. When I learned that you had a way of stopping him and Hades?” His smile turned ruthless. “Let’s just say I called in some favors to verify it was you.”

  Still … “Prophesied doesn’t mean guaranteed.” Zeus himself had said as much.

  He stretched out his legs. “I know you’re nervous, Persephone. You’re hesitant to let me in on the exact nature of what will take them down.”

  It wasn’t nerves. It was secrets. Persephone didn’t want him to know about Kai’s involvement in all this. Or her imminent betrayal of Kai and Demeter.

  “But you’ve trusted me with your safety,” Prometheus continued. “My one job is to get you out of here tomorrow night. I’ve secured us passage. Once we’re out and you accept that you’re safe in my hands, you can fill me in on the next stage.”

  I thought all this through. If Persephone had needed Prometheus to get her out of the Underworld, then she’d known that her pendent wouldn’t work. She’d might also have known that even Kai wouldn’t be able to help with that.

  Theo had said he’d been supposed to meet Demeter on the night Persephone had been killed. I was willing to bet she was the secure passage. Which meant he’d struck the deal to exit to her temple grounds before.

  Except, back then, Kai would’ve had to go with Persephone. She’d still needed him to do the love ritual. So she couldn’t have harmed him until afterward. But once she’d killed Kai, there would have been a witness. The very being who had spirited them out.

  Prometheus.

  I dropped my head. Felt ill. Persephone had been planning to betray Prometheus, too. My resolve hardened. That hadn’t happened, and it sure as hell wouldn’t happen this time as long as I stayed in control. More reason to have Prometheus get that truth spirit here and break this enchantment. I spoke up. “Prometheus—”

  “That’s right,” he said. “You had something you wanted me to do.”

  I did, but first I wanted him to know exactly where he stood with me. I took his hand. “I trust you,” I said insistently. “More than anyone.”

  He didn’t break contact. Instead, he squeezed my hand tighter. “I will see you through this, keep you safe no matter what.” His eyes were solemn as they stared into mine. “I swear.”

  It was a super intense and highly charged moment.

  Which was pretty much the worst possible way that Kai could have found us. “What have we here?” His voice was a smooth purr. It caressed my skin like silk, then slid under it like ice.

  I’d never heard this voice before. It terrified me. Because after that horrible night two months ago, I knew how mad Kai could get.

  This sounded worse. Felt worse.

  Prometheus let go of me and pushed to his feet.

  Leaving me scrambling, brushing the dead grass from my dress. “Nothing,” I said.

  “What are you up to, kardia mou?” Kai’s breath was warm against my ear as he twined around me in a tight circle, like a cat.

  I shivered.

&nb
sp; His hand caressed my hip for a fleeting second.

  I shrugged, bored, and played the same “dislike” card that Prometheus had pulled out when Thanatos had interrupted us on the soccer field. “Nothing. He’s a jerk.”

  Kai paused and placed his index finger against his lips. “Hmmmm. Thing is,” he gave me a sweet smile. “I don’t believe you.”

  Yeah. I wouldn’t have either. This was bad. Dread to the tips of my toes, bad. I folded my fingers over my sweaty palms and opened my mouth to speak but something cut me off.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Prometheus give an exasperated shake of his head and turn to leave, but Kai shot a blast of black light and totally eviscerated the ground beneath Prometheus’ feet. He stumbled, barely staying upright.

  “Another inch and it’s your legs,” Kai said, not taking his eyes off me. He flicked a hand. “Imprison him.” His tone of voice didn’t change. But his eyes flashed with the same fathomless black that I’d seen in the barrier around Nyx.

  A dozen Pyrosim showed up to form a fiery guard around Prometheus. They arranged themselves in a tight flaming square, completely blocking him in.

  “I’ll take you down with me,” Prometheus swore as he got to his feet. The minions were pressed too close for him to do anything other than stand, if he wanted to remain untoasted. His skin flushed red from the heat. And maybe his anger.

  Kai laughed. “Try it. I dare you. I’ll bury you so deep that you’ll be forgotten.” There was absolute promise and sneering certainty in his voice.

  It made Kai sound more like his father than I’d ever heard him. That was terrifying.

  I whipped my eyes away from Kai, so he couldn’t see my panic.

  Prometheus walked backward, facing me through the flames of his prison as the Pyrosim marched him off. “Believe,” he mouthed.

  I grabbed Kai’s arm, more than ready to beg. “Don’t take him. Please. It’s not what you think. There’s nothing going on between him and me. I’m not even his type.” I didn’t want to accidentally out Prometheus if Kai didn’t know.

  “You think I’m worried about that?” he scoffed. “But there is something going on with you. You’ve been different lately.” He bit down on the edge of his bottom lip, lost in thought. “I figured I was imagining things, but the way you acted yesterday and today? Holding me at arms’ length?”