by Lynn Galli
“You want to become a mountain man, do ya?” I teased.
“I can’t wait to show you everything we made up here. When are you coming?”
“Next week. We’ll hang out with Grandma and Grandpa for a bit, visit Grams and Papa, too.”
“I wish Hank could come with you.”
The mention of his friend prompted a glance at mine. She was busying herself by looking through my library of textbooks.
“You’ll see him in a few weeks. I think he’s still at camp, too.”
“Are we going be home before school so I can hang out with him?”
“A few days before, plenty of time for sleepovers and all-night chat sessions. You’ll be all caught up on your summers in no time.”
“Can’t wait. Oh, gotta go, Mom. It’s swim time at the lake. I’ll see you next week. I love you.”
“I love you, too, Caleb. Be good.” I closed the phone, giddy as usual from talking to my son, who sounded more and more grownup every time we chatted.
“How is he enjoying camp?” M turned back from the bookshelves.
“They gave the kids bows and arrows to use; he’s beside himself.”
She laughed and the unexpected sound made me a little lightheaded. “Hank’s having a great time at his camp, too. They’ve come up with an entirely new form of ASL to fool the camp counselors daily. The kids love it, but I’m guessing their parents will be exasperated when they get back and try using it at home.”
“How did you learn? Was it because of Hank?” She shook her head and slipped cautiously back into her seat.
“Kathryn would volunteer on weekends at a school for the deaf in Chicago. She worked with the special needs kids who were also hearing impaired. I tagged along and picked it up.” Remarkable. Everything about M was remarkable. “She seems like an amazing woman.”
“Very much so.” She picked up the business plan we’d been working on, obviously ready to get back to work. I bit back the groan of disappointment. “Actually, that’s where I’m headed for the break. They’re having a fundraiser and need some extra help.”
“See, now, why couldn’t you just say that before, Miranda?” I teased, stopping myself from nudging her with my shoulder.
“Not this again,” she sighed dramatically, but her tone and expression didn’t seem at all bothered. “I thought you’d given that up.”
“Not a chance, this is better than reading a good mystery.” I wiggled my eyebrows at her. “Hmm, let’s see, M names that I haven’t guessed yet. Michelle? No, not old fashioned enough.
Marilyn? Old fashioned but still quite prevalent. Medussa? No, no one would do that to a child. Mae, Marianne, Marnie, Maude, Melanie, Medea, Melissa, Meg—” My heart jumped into my throat as my stomach twisted tightly. No! Please, don’t let it be. I gripped the armrest of her chair. She flinched, but her eyes showed concern for what must have been a much paler version of me facing her. “I know you’re not giving me your name, but please tell me it isn’t—”
“My name isn’t Megan,” she cut in, returning the placement of my heart and uncoiling my stomach.
“Thank you for telling me.” I faced forward slowly. A tremor shook my hands as I placed them in my lap. “That’s what I get for teasing you.”
She gave a soft laugh, allowing me the dignity of trying to play off my near meltdown. “How long were you together? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to talk about it.”
“Eleven years married, a year seeing each other before that.”
“What was she like?”
I let out a puff of air. Never an easy question to answer, but with M, I didn’t mind attempting. “A little audacious, a lot compassionate. Meg could convince anyone of anything if she truly believed in it. And kids were her weakness. Whatever they wanted, she couldn’t deny them. Caleb always knew which mom to ask when he needed permission. Her nieces and nephews got away with murder whenever they stayed with us.” I laughed as I remembered a particular sleepover where kids were up puking all night because Megan had let them skip dinner for three courses of desserts. “Mostly, she was easygoing. Nothing seemed to faze her or surprise her, which I thought was a fabulous trait when I was a stressed out twenty-four-year-old dealing with a dissertation committee, but it got a little irksome as I got older.” Especially when I’d put a lot of effort into surprising her or wanted to get her riled up about something that I felt was vital.
M’s smile told me she understood why that tendency might be frustrating. “What did she do for a living?”
“She was a receptionist when we met, but after I got my Ph.D. and we’d gotten a handle on finances, we started an adventure company together. During the school year, I’d take care of the behind the scenes business stuff while she led the vacation tours. In the summer, I’d be out there with her.” I’d always loved that.
Summers hiking, rafting, hand gliding, kayaking, wind surfing, and any other activities that Meg had planned for our clients on their week-long adventure. I’d always thought that teaching summer session couldn’t compare to the trips we’d take, even with some of the more whiny clients. No way teaching a class could beat that. Not until this summer.
“Sounds exciting.”
“A little too, in my opinion. It was mostly fun for me, but she absolutely loved it.” Miraculously, I didn’t feel the usual sadness whenever I talked about Megan with people. Further proof that I was healing. I glanced at M and recognized she wanted to ask the question but wouldn’t. “Rock climbing was her favorite. I enjoyed it, too. I remember being annoyed that she’d chosen to schedule a rock climbing trip a few weeks before spring term was done. She hadn’t done it to keep me from going. She just couldn’t wait to get in the first climb of the season.” While my heart beat a little faster, I wasn’t experiencing the usual need to hyperventilate when I thought about that trip I’d missed. “Someone in the group went off line, a hotshot, thought he knew what he was doing but got stuck without a way out. Meg unclipped and free climbed over to help guide him to the best holds. She got him safely back to the line and was on her way when a hand and foothold gave way.” M sat quietly absorbing. I liked that she didn’t try to placate me with empty words. “She saved a man’s life.” Succinctly put. “Yes, she did.”
“That was very brave of her.” She slid the business plan back between us on the desk. “Thank you for sharing that with me.”
“You’re the first person I’ve told here.” I felt it was important to let her know that she was special to me.
She did a double-take. “Not Jessie?”
“No.” It was one of the reasons I knew Jessie and I weren’t right for each other. I could tell her now, but while we were dating, I didn’t feel like I could have.
“Oh,” she acknowledged softly. The flush returned unexpectedly, and she turned to study a framed photo of Caleb on my bookcase. “Have you seen Jessie recently?”
“Yesterday, why?”
“Nothing.” She shook her head and a tremor rolled through her body.
The tremor worried me. What if Jessie told her about the conversation we’d had? Jessie wouldn’t betray a confidence like that, would she? “Did she say something to you?” She studied me for a long moment. “No, I don’t get much chance to speak with her at the gym.”
I wanted to blow out the breath I’d been holding but knew it would look obvious. “Well, you could come to dinner with me on Sunday up at Willa and Quinn’s and have a whole evening to talk to her if you wanted.” Mentally crossing my fingers, I fought to keep her gaze. Her eyes widened. For a second, it looked like she’d agree to come along, but the look was replaced by the same type of panic I’d been feeling. I decided to let her off the hook. “Of course, if you did, my friend Caroline would probably start trying to fix you up, so maybe not.”
“Definitely not,” she agreed quickly then added, “but thank you for the invitation.”
“You’re welcome.” I was almost as relieved as she was, but only because I knew what
my friends would be like with her. If any of them found out I was harboring these feelings for her, she’d never escape and my humiliation would be turned into an after dinner game.
Chapter 25
The department meeting would go differently this time. I was sure of it. As I entered the auditorium on the last day of the summer session, I scanned the seats for M. She’d sit with me today.
“Lucked out with those students. Could have been a disaster if they hadn’t had such well prepared plans,” Dr. Wagner grumbled bitterly as he stepped past me down the aisle.
Only because M and I helped them make the plans stellar, I wanted to shout back, but I kept my snarky retort to myself. I was a professional even if he wasn’t. Plus, my flash annoyance dissipated when I spotted M sitting in the side section alone.
“Is this seat taken?” My question caused her to jolt forward and swing her head over to me in the aisle.
“Don’t you want to sit with your friends?” She pointed up to where Javier and Alexa sat first row center.
“I will be.” I gave her a pointed stare and indicated the vacant chair next to her.
She smiled widely and looked away, but not before I caught the blush. God, she was beautiful. “Please.” She tipped her chin at the open seat.
“Glad to be done with summer session?” I swiveled in my seat to face her. “Three classes, one you didn’t even sign up for?” I’d only had the one class, and I was wiped out.
“I enjoyed every minute.” She locked eyes with me and a lance of heat shot through me. This time I felt my own face flush. It was getting harder and harder to fight this attraction to her.
“Well done, everyone,” Gene called out from the podium, snapping my attention back. “Another successful summer session.
This one landed us on the front page of the Wall Street Journal, by the way.” He held up the evidence of his statement. “Thanks to our brilliant venture program, we now have one of the top five entrepreneurship programs in the country.” He preened for a bit before continuing. “I think we should all give Drs. Gatewood and Desiderius a hand for their part in making this project a big success.”
Solicited applause rang out through the auditorium. I blushed from embarrassment this time and glanced at M. She’d slouched down in her chair, pulling closer to use my body as a shield. She really hated this, and suddenly, I hated it for her. Shifting forward, I angled toward the rest of the crowd, hoping to provide a better shield for her. “Thank you, Gene, it’s been a wonderful ride. Those students were every professor’s dream. Everyone on the selection committee did a wonderful job as well.”
“Quite right.” Gene shifted the focus from us to the five professors who’d been part of the selection committee.
“You all right?” I twisted back toward M.
“Yes, thank you.” Her relieved voice brought a hitch to my breath. That and how close she was to me right now. She seemed to notice it in that moment, too, but instead of jerking away from me, she slowly inched back into the middle of her seat. A flicker of longing showed in her eyes when she glanced back at the place she’d burrowed into.
Gene continued with his praise of other classes and a pep talk for the fall term. I barely listened to anything he said, now hyperaware of how close M was sitting to me. If I moved my thigh I might be able to brush up against hers, but I couldn’t do that.
Not yet. I needed to know she wanted the same thing.
When he finished up, people started piling into the aisles.
Alexa and Javier funneled into our row. “We must bow at your feet, oh great ones of venture programs,” Javier joked.
“Shut it,” I shot back with a smile. “Back to Texas?”
“I thought I might hit Vermont with you. I’m already packed.”
“She’ll take me before she takes you, mister,” Alexa taunted and pulled me into a hug. “You did a great job with that symposium, lady. You too, M.”
M started forward in her chair, surprise showing on her face.
“Thank you.”
“You have a great break, Bri. Take lots of pictures. We’ll have a slide show when you get back.”
“Sounds good. Have a great time yourself. You too, Javier.” I gave them a quick hug and waved as they headed toward the exit.
“Well done, you two.” Gene replaced my friends at our row.
“Thank you, Gene. And thank you for your kind praise earlier. We appreciate it.”
“This went better than even I anticipated, and you’re both to be commended.”
“Thank you, Dr. Goudy,” M said softly.
“I hope you’re up for the same next summer because I see this being a permanent symposium each year. You two were stars; we’ll need your help again.”
My eyes widened, not expecting him to try to sign us up a year in advance of the class. “Why don’t we talk about it next term?
Give us a little time to recover from the unexpected summer?”
“Of course, yes. See you in a few weeks. Thank you both, again.”
“You’re welcome,” I supplied and watched him take leave.
“Guess the program really surprised some folks.”
“Seems so.” M finally stood.
I backed out before her eyes could plead with me to move.
“I’ll walk with you.” I had to. I wasn’t ready to let her go just yet.
We started up the aisle and flowed out into the now deserted hallway. Our colleagues must have scrambled to get off campus as soon as possible. This break between summer session and fall term was always the longest, and no one liked to waste a second of it. I wouldn’t be surprised if we were the only two souls left on north campus.
Because my office was farther away, we found ourselves heading up the staircase to hers. “When do you leave for Chicago?”
“Saturday. When are you on a plane?”
“Tomorrow. My parents are expecting me for a day before we go pick up Caleb.”
She gave me a wistful glance as she unlocked the door to her office. It was hard to tell if she was wistful about the idea of visiting parents or missing me. I hoped it was the latter. I didn’t have much time to contemplate it before she invited me inside.
Since we’d always met in class or my office, this was the first time I was seeing hers. It was a lot less cluttered with plain walls, no pictures, and tons of books. A sliver of color peeked out in between two books. A framed oil painting of all types of flowers in a blue vase represented the only color in the room.
She began putting her laptop into her bag. “I hope you have a nice time.”
“I’m going to miss sharing class with you.”
“It was fun,” she confirmed without hesitation then grabbed her wallet out of her desk drawer and added it to the bag. Only her sunglasses were left to pack away.
“I’m going to miss you.” My heart rate slowed to almost flatline as she stopped packing and gave me her full attention.
Those reddish brown eyes stared intently at me. I wanted to reach out and touch her cheek again then run my fingers through the stylish strands of chestnut hair. I bet it was soft, really soft, especially at her nape where it was shorn shorter than the rest. I longed to rub the silky patch of skin just behind her ear. I wasn’t sure how long I could keep these urges to myself. In fact, just the thought to restrain them had the opposite effect, and I found myself tilting forward to grip the back of a chair, sucking in a deep breath.
“Are you okay?” She stepped toward me, concern marking her expression.
“Yes, fine.” I straightened up, feeling lightheaded and flushed.
“You don’t look fine. You look like you need to sit down.” She pulled out the chair I’d been gripping and gestured to sit.
“No, I don’t.” My mouth went dry. I was going to say it. I knew I was, and I knew I couldn’t stop myself. “I’m wildly attracted to you, M. I don’t mean to shock you, but I can’t continue to act like you don’t affect me. I felt I should give voice to it, but it
doesn’t have to change our friendship.” She’d started backing up the moment I opened my big mouth. Now she was slammed against the far wall, glancing at the door to either make sure it was closed or calculate how long it would take her to escape.
I held up a placating hand. “I’ve scared you. I’m sorry.”
“No.”
Back to single word responses. Splendid. At least she’d relaxed a bit, but she hadn’t moved out of her corner. If I’d thought it would go differently, I was kidding myself. “I’ll just go.”
“No.” She took one step toward me, and my heart went from no beats to a pace that could bring me to my knees. She wasn’t dropping my gaze either. Could it be?
“I haven’t scared you?” She shook her head in response. “You don’t want me to go?” Another shake of her head. I swallowed roughly before continuing. “Are you attracted to me, too?” This time her head didn’t confirm or deny my question. The gaze, though, didn’t falter. I thought my heart might explode. She’s attracted to me. She is!
“I’m not…” she hesitated.
Oh crap, she isn’t.
After a long moment, she finished, “Normal.”
“Don’t say that, M.” I started toward her, but she brought a hand up to tell me to stop.
“You’re beautiful and wonderful, Briony. I want nothing more than to act on this attraction.” Her voice was tight and raw, not the voice of someone who was ready to press me against the desk and rip off my clothes. Drawing a shaky breath, she continued, “That boy…it wasn’t just once. It was two years. He threatened to kill me, which after the first few times I would have welcomed, but then he said he’d hurt SueElla if I told, so I just let him do that to me. For two years. It was painful every time. Do you have any idea how long two years is for a twelve-year-old?”
“Oh, God,” I whispered. Tears pooled in my eyes and a lump the size of a small boulder formed in my throat. She’d been twelve, and it had lasted forever.