‘It’s rented,’ she corrected him.
‘So what’s the procedure? Will the landlord accept a lump sum in lieu of notice?’
‘I share,’ she told him flatly.
Luigi felt his guts tighten. He’d almost forgotten the boyfriend. Oddly, Megan hadn’t seemed too concerned about leaving him. It wasn’t a nice feeling to realise that he didn’t know the way his own wife’s mind worked. In fact, had he ever really got to know her? Hadn’t he been too immersed in his own business dealings? Physically, they’d both been fulfilled, but mentally and spiritually? A brief sadness filled him. ‘What do you think he’ll have to say about you moving in with me?’
‘He? Oh, Jake. There’s not much he can say, is there? I’m still legally married to you.’
She sounded remarkably calm and for some reason it angered him. ‘If you think you’re still going to see him, then you can forget it,’ he barked.
‘Have I said I will?’
Could it be that he was blowing the whole thing up out of all proportion? Perhaps this Jake fellow meant nothing to her. Maybe it was a cost-effective arrangement. But he couldn’t be sure and the thought of Megan sharing a bed with another man, the thought of her thrashing about with the same uninhibited responses, made his blood run cold.
‘No, you haven’t and you’d damn well better not,’ he warned tersely. ‘In fact, if he’s there tonight I’ll tell him myself. In fact I’ll—’
‘You don’t have to worry,’ she cut in. ‘He’s in Paris—with his fiancée.’
Luigi pulled the car into the side of the road and tugged on the handbrake. ‘What did you say?’
‘Jake’s with Jenny in Paris for Christmas. Jenny’s my housemate.’
‘So why the hell didn’t you tell me that in the beginning?’ he roared, hating the idea that she’d made a fool of him.
‘I found it amusing that you jumped to the wrong conclusion.’
‘Well I don’t find it amusing,’ he retorted. ‘I’ve suffered all sorts of horrors imaging you in bed with him.’
‘There’s nothing you could have done about it,’ she pointed out. ‘But do you really think I’d have agreed to move in with you if I was involved with someone else?’
He had thought he’d given her no choice; now he began to realise that Megan had had the upper hand all the time. ‘I like to think that you would, for Charlotte’s sake,’ he told her grimly. He restarted the engine and drove fast and furious and silent until they reached their destination.
The house was freezing and he hadn’t been as sensible as Megan and pulled on an overcoat. ‘I hope your pipes haven’t frozen,’ he said testily, rubbing his hands together. ‘You really shouldn’t leave it unheated like this, you could have a burst.’
‘And who’d pay the fuel bills?’ she retorted smartly.
‘So how’s your friend going to manage?’
Megan shrugged. ‘Maybe Jake will move in. What I do know is that she won’t be very happy when she discovers that I’ve left without giving her notice.’
‘Don’t worry about that,’ said Luigi offhandedly. ‘I’ll see that she’s not out of pocket.’
‘Here we go again,’ she derided as she flung clothes into the suitcases she had brought back with her. ‘Money solves all problems, that’s your maxim, isn’t it? Well, it’s not mine, and I don’t want you insulting Jenny by offering her money.’
Luigi was quite sure that her friend wouldn’t be insulted. In fact he’d like to stake a bet that she’d be hugely grateful for any handout. What person wouldn’t? But he didn’t say this to Megan because he knew what sort of a response he would get. Instead he said, ‘You know her best.’ He fully intended, though, to see that the other girl didn’t lose out because he had spirited her housemate away.
‘When are your friends coming back?’
‘I’m not sure. Tomorrow, I think,’ she told him bluntly, reaching down a holdall from the top of her wardrobe and throwing in toiletries and other bits and pieces that he presumed she couldn’t live without. Personally, he would rather she left them behind and he bought her a whole load of new stuff. But with the fuss she’d made about the Christmas presents he knew he dared not suggest it. Megan had become a highly independent lady.
Finally she wrote a note for Jenny and placed it on the kitchen table. ‘OK, I’m ready,’ she said. ‘Let’s go.’
He would have liked it better if she looked happy about it. Instead a scowl marred her lovely face. It wasn’t going to be the happy union he’d hoped for. But given time…And a lot of persuasion on his part! And no working long hours! Though how he was going to achieve that he didn’t know. There were always problems of one sort or another to be dealt with. Yes, he had managers, very good ones, but he liked to be kept informed at all levels. It was why he was so successful. Surely Megan could understand that?
‘I wish you could be happy about this,’ he said as they began their journey home.
Megan sighed and said nothing.
‘If I’d known how unhappy you were before I would have done something about it. Why didn’t you say?’
‘Because it wouldn’t have mattered, you’d have still gone your own way,’ she retorted sharply. ‘I couldn’t stand living in an empty world any longer. And I pray I’m not making the same mistake again. I’m not sure that I’m doing the right thing even now, but I’ll give it a try for Charlotte’s sake.’
That night Megan wouldn’t allow Luigi into her bed. Lord, she wanted to, she even ached for him, but the Serena issue prevented her. She didn’t tell him it was because of his PA, but he guessed anyway.
‘You’re making a huge mistake,’ he told her grimly, as they stood outside her bedroom door. Charlotte had been bathed earlier and they’d sat in his den with their now ritual night-time drink. ‘Serena is not and never has been my bed partner.’
‘But she’d like to be? And you’ve taken her out? There’s more to it than a professional relationship?’
Luigi drew in a deeply pained breath. ‘She’d like there to be,’ he admitted.
‘And you’re strong enough to withstand the allure of a beautiful woman?’
‘Serena, yes.’
Megan’s eyes narrowed. ‘So there have been others?’ Her tone was deeply accusing.
‘You can’t blame me,’ he rasped, his eyes dark and resentful. ‘I’m a red-blooded male, full of sex hormones that need feeding now and then.’
‘So that’s what I was doing, feeding your hormones?’ Megan’s head began to spin. It was one way of putting it, she supposed. He’d always been highly sexed with a hot-blooded Latin male possessiveness that had at one time thrilled her, but now sent a sickening chill into the very heart of her soul. She fed his need; it was as simple as that. And she had compromised herself by agreeing to move in with him!
He had a lot to prove before she’d allow him into her bed again—and if he dared to let any other woman assuage his sexual urges then she’d be out of here quicker than he could say I’m sorry.
‘You’re different, Megan, you should know that. You’re my wife, you’re mine, and we need each other. Haven’t we proved it?’
He stood close and she could smell the very maleness of him. It excited her beyond measure but she knew that she had to be strong. ‘I need you like I’d need a boil on the end of my nose,’ she spat. ‘I’ve managed very well, thank you, for the last four years. The only reason I’ve agreed to stay is for Charlotte’s benefit. But if you give me hell, like you’re doing at this moment, then I’ll run away again.’
‘You’d be that selfish?’ he blazed. ‘You’d deprive my daughter of her father’s guidance just because you—’ he stabbed the word incisively ‘—can’t handle the idea that while we’ve been parted I’ve had other girlfriends. God dammit, woman, I didn’t think I was ever going to see you again.’
‘So now I am here have you told Serena it’s hands off time? Have you told her we’re back together?’
‘We had other more p
ressing issues to discuss.’
‘So you haven’t told her,’ accused Megan, her eyes glinting. ‘Damn you, Luigi, you’d better do it quickly, because if I take any more calls from her I’ll fill her so full of home truths that she won’t even want to work with you, never mind insinuating herself into your bed.’
Megan knew that she was getting too wound up for her own good but she couldn’t help it. She was afraid that everything was going to go pear-shaped, and she’d end up being even more hurt than before. And this time Charlotte would be hurt too. This was her main concern.
‘I can assure you, Megan,’ he said in a low growl, ‘that you are my number one priority. Serena never has nor ever will enter the equation.’
He looked as though he wanted to kiss her, actually bowing his head and inching closer. Pulses began to race and Megan knew that if she hesitated it would be too late. With speed born of panic she flung open the door. ‘I wish I could believe you. Goodnight, Luigi.’ And she slammed it behind her.
Her heart raced as though she’d run a hundred-yard sprint. It would be so easy to fall back into their old ways, to become Luigi’s wife again in every sense of the word. But it was too soon. He had to prove himself first. She must take control of her feelings, not give the slightest hint that she wanted him like she never had before. It was going to be hard but she had to do it, for the sake of their future.
Sleep didn’t come easily. What was easy was remembering Luigi in bed beside her. The space felt empty. She felt empty. If they had nothing else in common she couldn’t deny that they made a spectacular couple in bed.
Frequently she wandered into Charlotte’s room to check that she was OK. She looked so beautiful and so innocent with not a care in the world, happy to be in this house with her father, and for her sake Megan was glad that she’d agreed to stay on.
When she went down to breakfast the next morning Megan was surprised to see Luigi seated at the table, the morning paper spread out in front of him, a steaming cup of coffee in his hand. Luigi was very much a coffee man. He’d once told her that he’d had so much tea poured into him as a child that it had put him off it for life.
‘Good morning.’ He looked up with a warm smile. ‘Did you sleep well?’
Should she lie and say yes, or tell the truth? Megan lied. ‘Brilliantly well, thank you. And yourself?’
‘Yes, I had a good night too.’
But she knew they were both politely lying. She was willing to bet that he’d tossed and turned the whole night as well, wishing they were together, reliving the magical moments they’d shared. Feeling stirred by them, feeling a hunger that was hard to dismiss.
Even as she’d walked into the room and their eyes met, Megan’s senses had skidded out of control and she’d had to turn away quickly, making a big thing of helping Charlotte into her chair.
Charlotte chatted away to her father and Megan was able to take a firm hold of her dithering emotions. This was ridiculous. How could she live with Luigi and follow her own self-imposed rules feeling as she did? Why not share his bed? Because, came the severe answer, you’ll be doubly hurt if it doesn’t work. And that had to be the truth.
Not until Edwina had brought in their breakfast did Megan question Luigi. ‘I thought you’d be at work. It’s a quarter past eight. If I remember rightly you’re normally at your desk by seven-thirty.’
‘So you didn’t believe me when I said I was going to change?’ he asked with a mocking lift to an eyebrow.
His hair was neatly combed, his jaw clean-shaven and he smelt heavenly. For the life of her she couldn’t remember the name of his cologne, but he had always used the same one for as long as she’d known him. To her it was an aphrodisiac and as she inhaled it she closed her eyes and dreamt of him making love to her.
‘Is something wrong?’ asked Luigi sharply.
‘What? I’m sorry. No! Nothing! And, no, I didn’t believe you. But I’m glad to see that you’ve kept your word.’ He was wearing a white silk shirt, open at the throat, and she had an insane urge to touch his chest with her fingertips, to feel the strength of that muscular body, to—
‘Megan?’
Again he brought her back to the present.
‘Are you sure you’ve had enough sleep? You look as though you’re in a trance. Shall I take the day off and look after Charlotte while—?’
‘No!’ she exclaimed strongly. ‘There’s nothing wrong with me. I was thinking about something, that’s all. Mmm, this bacon smells good.’
As they ate she was aware of him watching her, and when Charlotte had finished and run away into the kitchen to ‘help ‘Wina’ he said, ‘Something’s wrong, isn’t it? I hope you’re not having second thoughts, or should I say third? Because, make no bones about it, this is now your home.’
‘I know,’ Megan said quietly. ‘You don’t have to rub it in. I have no intention of leaving, not yet anyway.’
‘By the way,’ he said, as he poured himself yet another cup of coffee, Megan shaking her head when he offered her one, ‘I’ve employed a nanny for Charlotte.’
‘You’ve done what?’ That really did wake her up and Megan bounced her hands off the table, her eyes flashing furiously. ‘What have you done that for? I’m perfectly capable of looking after my own daughter.’
‘Of course you are,’ he said evenly. ‘You’ve proved that, but wouldn’t it be nice to have more time to yourself?’
‘No, it wouldn’t,’ she slammed. ‘You’d better ring her right now and tell her she’s not wanted. You have no idea what a child needs. It’s certainly not a stranger looking after her; her parents’ time and love is far more important.’ She was beside herself with rage. How could he do this without consulting her? Quite easily, came the answer. He was used to giving orders, used to organising. But she was not one of his employees and he wasn’t going to tell her what to do.
‘I happen to think that it’s important for us to spend more time together,’ he said, visibly containing his patience. ‘We have a lot of catching up to do, Megan.’
‘And how can we do that when you work all the hours God gave?’ she snapped.
‘Because I shall make time,’ he retorted harshly, pushing himself to his feet and glaring down at her.
‘Ha! That will be a first,’ she thrust back. ‘How long will it last, I wonder? One day? Two? A whole week at the most?’ And she too sprang up from her chair.
‘Things are different now I have a daughter,’ he rasped, dark eyes glittering. ‘I’m a family man now and I intend to take care of my family.’
‘And hiring a nanny is part of that care?’ she yelled. ‘What if Charlotte doesn’t like her? What if—?’
‘We’ll give it a try,’ he interjected tersely, his fingers clenching as he fought for control. ‘And that’s the end of it.’
Megan flounced out of the room. Arguing with Luigi when he was in this mood got her nowhere, but she was fiercely determined not to give in. When the nanny arrived she would tell her in no uncertain terms that she wasn’t needed. Luigi could say what he liked; Charlotte did not need a nanny. Not when she was at home all day to look after her. If Luigi wanted to spend more time at home he would have to put up with Charlotte as well, he wasn’t getting rid of her that easily.
Was that it, she wondered, for all his fine words he found an excitable, energetic daughter too daunting? He didn’t like his routine upset. A nanny would solve the problem. Another case of using the power of his money to get what he wanted. Megan spat fire as she sought her daughter in the kitchen. How dared he dictate? How dared he try to take over her life?
It was evening before she saw him again and her anger hadn’t subsided. As soon as Charlotte was in bed she began her attack. ‘I hope you’ve cancelled the nanny?’
‘Why would I do that?’ A harsh frown dragged his thick brows together.
‘You mean you didn’t listen to a word I said?’ Megan’s eyes flashed her fury. In fact her whole body grew stiff with rage and she battered her f
ists against his chest. ‘Just because you can’t handle Charlotte it doesn’t mean I need help.’
In response he pulled her hard against him, his arms binding her so that she could no longer fight. ‘I am doing this for us, not Charlotte.’ His dark eyes pierced her own, sending a frisson of awareness through her despite the anger that she felt—or perhaps because of it! ‘We are the ones who need time,’ he asserted strongly. ‘We have a whole four years to catch up.’
‘And you think that handing over our daughter to a complete stranger will help?’ she questioned hotly. ‘As far as I’m concerned there’s nothing to talk about. I’m still convinced that I did the right thing.’
Luigi snorted his annoyance. ‘If it were just you and me then I could perhaps understand. But I’ll never be able to forgive you for depriving me of my daughter’s first years.’
‘I doubt you’d have seen much of her,’ she scorned, struggling in vain to free herself. ‘In case you’ve forgotten, your continual absence was the reason I walked out.’
‘Dammit, Megan, why do you keep throwing that at me?’ he charged, tightening his hold. ‘What I want to know is why you never made me aware of it?’
‘Oh, I did, believe me, many times,’ she yelled into his face, her eyes flashing dramatically. ‘You wouldn’t listen, that was the problem. You were so wrapped up in your entrepreneurial world that nothing I said sank in. You assumed that making money was high on my list of priorities too. Well, let me tell you—’ Her words were cut off by Luigi’s mouth closing over hers. And in that moment Megan knew that she had lost.
Chapter 6
Luigi found it hard to accept that Megan was against him employing someone to look after Charlotte. It was the perfect solution. They needed to spend more time together, they needed to iron out the problems that had sent her fleeing; how could they do that with a three-year-old constantly demanding their attention?
He’d thought hard about their situation and had made up his mind that he would delegate more in order to give Megan his undivided attention. Admittedly he would like to be involved with the problems with the new software, and he’d like to keep his eye on the running of Gerards. But in truth he had staff who were more than capable of dealing with any situation.
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