He didn’t pay good wages for nothing. He expected hard work and loyalty, and that was what he usually got. It was only his own desire to be involved in all aspects of his varied business interests that kept him going long hours. But now he was needed in another, more important, direction. Probably the most important one of his life. His whole future depended on it.
His arms became more possessive. Megan was his! She belonged to him for all time. He’d made mistakes but their future was transparently clear. The three of them were a family and nothing or no one was going to split them up. Employing a nanny was a necessity as far as he was concerned. He and Megan desperately needed time; they needed to renew their vows, to renew the love that had once bound them so firmly together.
On the day they met he’d fallen instantly in love and even if she hadn’t let him drive her home with her dangerously overflowing bags of Christmas goodies he would have found some other way to get to know her. Maybe meeting her again at Christmas time was a good omen. The thought pleased him and he deepened his kiss, even more thrilled when Megan didn’t resist.
She felt so good in his arms, her slender body moulding perfectly to his, and he silently prayed that she would let him back into her bed. He had tasted paradise and then been denied it. More than once in the endless dark hours he’d padded to her door, prepared to storm in and not take no for an answer. How he had turned around and returned to his room he didn’t know. It had been sheer hell.
But thankfully she was weakening. The way she was kissing him now with complete abandonment, the way she moved her body suggestively against his, was all the encouragement he needed. He lifted her into his arms with the initial thought of carrying her up to bed, but then thought better of it and they ended up on the sofa instead.
‘My beautiful Megan,’ he whispered huskily into her ear. ‘You’ve no idea how hard it’s been having you in my house and not being allowed to touch you.’
‘Don’t talk,’ she breathed, pulling his mouth down to hers and kissing him so passionately that he felt as though all his dreams were coming true. But suddenly Charlotte’s scream cut through their pleasure.
They were both on their feet in an instant, Megan hurtling up the stairs in panic. He followed close behind. What had happened to his daughter? Had she fallen? Was she hurt? His heart thudded as he realised how deeply he had come to love this child in the few short days he’d known her.
Charlotte was sitting straight up in bed, her eyes wide and staring. ‘She’s asleep,’ said Megan, slowing her hectic race. ‘She’s dreaming.’
‘Does she often do this, dream with her eyes open?’ asked Luigi in concern. It looked weird to him.
‘Only when something’s upset her. It’s some kind of nightmare, I think. It’s always the same.’
As they watched Charlotte’s body relaxed, her eyes closed and she gave a half smile as she curled up beneath the bedcovers again.
Megan leaned over her and gave her a gentle kiss. ‘I try not to wake her because then she doesn’t remember.’
Luigi frowned. ‘What could have upset her?’
Megan shrugged and straightened the quilt. ‘Maybe she heard us arguing. She’s a sensitive little soul and we didn’t keep our voices very low, did we?’
Luigi shook his head. ‘We were too far away.’ But a shadow of guilt made him uneasy. He had a lot to learn about children. ‘Will she be all right if we leave her?’
‘I’m going to stay in my room just in case,’ declared Megan. ‘Alone!’ she added warningly.
Luigi compressed his lips. ‘We have unfinished business.’
‘That was a mistake,’ retorted Megan on a loud whisper.
‘Like marrying me was a mistake?’ He couldn’t help himself. He’d been so confident that tonight was the night they’d both realise that they couldn’t sleep apart, and to have it all snatched away from him because Charlotte had had a bad dream drove him crazy.
‘Since you put it like that, yes.’ Her eyes were cool on his, her earlier passion gone, melting as quickly as the snowflakes outside.
‘I think you’re lying,’ he snarled. ‘You’re afraid to admit it but you still care for me.’
‘In your dreams, Mister,’ she hissed.
‘Then why, when I kiss you, do you melt in my arms? Why do you return my kiss with so much passion that it makes a lie of everything you’re saying? Tell me that, dear wife of mine. Look me in the eye and tell me you have no feelings for me.’
Megan woke with a start. She’d been dreaming about Luigi and had the strangest feeling that he was standing beside her. But the room was empty. Even Charlotte hadn’t yet stirred. She switched on the bedside lamp and looked at the clock. Almost half past seven! It was unusual for her daughter to still be asleep. Usually she crept into her bed at around six and they both dozed for another hour.
She rolled out of bed and padded across to the window. It was dark, and all was still and cold and eerily white outside from a further fall of snow. Then she crossed to the adjoining door and opened it wider. What she hadn’t expected to see was Luigi sitting in a chair beside Charlotte’s bed holding her hand. They were both asleep.
For at least two minutes Megan stood there watching and wondering. Had her instinct been right when she’d thought he was beside her bed? She didn’t like the thought that he’d crept into her room in the middle of the night. He could have slipped in beside her and she wouldn’t have known! Had that been his intention and then he’d had second thoughts and decided to sit with his daughter instead?
Last night she’d declared that she had no feelings for him, that he managed to arouse her sexually but that was all. She’d even looked him straight in the eye as she’d said it. Because it was the truth. She didn’t love him any more. She didn’t!
Suddenly she realised that Luigi had opened his eyes and was watching her. ‘What are you doing?’ she asked in a fierce whisper.
Gently he let his daughter’s hand go and moved stiffly across the room towards her. Megan shut the adjoining door and glared at him as she waited for his answer.
‘Charlotte cried out again,’ he informed her.
Megan was horrified that she hadn’t heard. In fact she found it hard to believe. ‘Are you sure?’
‘I wouldn’t have been sitting there if I wasn’t,’ he informed her, stretching his arms above his head and yawning widely. His silk dressing gown fell open, revealing a pair of black boxer shorts and a tanned bare chest.
Megan’s heartbeats quickened.
‘She didn’t wake but I thought she ought to have company and, as you looked so beautiful and comfortable in your sleep,’ he growled, ‘I didn’t want to disturb you.’
‘You should have woken me,’ she tossed stormily. ‘It’s my place to be with her.’
‘Not any longer,’ he said with a warning light in his eyes. ‘We share responsibility now.’
The days of sharing with Luigi had long since gone. Luigi was his own man, doing only what he wanted to do. And at this moment he thought that sitting holding Charlotte’s hand made him look good. Would he be as quick to be at her side if she were throwing up? Somehow Megan doubted it.
‘We share?’ she echoed, ‘and yet you’ve gone to the trouble of employing a nanny. How hypocritical is that?’
‘It’s different; it’s a necessity.’
‘So you keep saying. I don’t happen to think so. I like looking after my daughter; perhaps you’re not aware of that. I don’t want a stranger doing it for me.’
‘I’ve said all I’m saying on that matter,’ he retorted sharply and headed for the door.
By the time he’d gone Charlotte had woken and when they went down to breakfast Luigi had left. ‘He said he won’t be more than a couple of hours,’ informed William, who had been entrusted with the message. ‘Something urgent cropped up.’
As it always did, thought Megan bitterly.
Amazingly, though, within the two hours he was back. Accompanying him was a smart young w
oman with long blonde hair. She was tall and slim and very good-looking. Serena, thought Megan, her hackles instantly rising. How dared he bring her here?
She and Charlotte were outside building yet another snowman and Luigi was all smiles as he approached them. ‘Megan, let me introduce Kate Swift, Charlotte’s nanny. Kate, my wife, Megan, and this is my daughter,’ he added proudly.
Megan knew she must look stupid with her mouth falling open and it was with a great deal of reluctance that she took Kate’s outstretched hand. ‘I hadn’t realised you were starting today,’ she said, trying to smile, but unable to keep a terse note out of her voice.
‘I thought it a good idea,’ explained Luigi.
And Megan knew why. He didn’t want Charlotte spoiling their lovemaking again. With a nanny on call twenty-four hours a day it would clear the way for him. The selfish swine! But if he thought she was going to leave her precious daughter totally in the care of someone else he was gravely mistaken.
‘And this is Charlotte?’ Kate stooped down to the child’s level. ‘Hello, Charlotte. What a grand snowman! Have you built it?’
But Charlotte had her thumb stuck in her mouth and clung to Megan’s hand, looking curiously at the smiling woman.
‘She’s always shy with strangers,’ explained Megan, a cool note still in her voice.
‘I think we should go indoors and let Kate settle in,’ said Luigi cheerfully.
‘Charlotte and I need to finish our snowman,’ said Megan. She was furious with Luigi. He had no right bringing that woman here without telling her first. She had thought, or at least hoped, that she’d convinced him that she didn’t want anyone else looking after Charlotte. It was a crazy idea. What the hell was she supposed to do all day while Kate took over?
‘Who’s that lady?’ asked Charlotte as soon as they had disappeared into the house.
Megan drew in a deep breath and paused a moment before answering, ‘She’s come to help Mummy look after you, sweetheart.’
‘I don’t want her, I want you,’ Charlotte said almost on a shout. ‘And Daddy,’ she added after a moment’s thought.
‘You’ll still have us, don’t worry, sweetheart. But sometimes, if Daddy and I have to go out, then Kate will look after you.’ It was the best explanation she could think of.
‘Will she play with me?’
‘Of course.’
‘Will she build a snowman, and play snowballs?’
‘I’m sure she will.’
‘Will she read me bedtime stories?’
Megan’s heart began to break. ‘Sometimes, perhaps, but that’s my job. That’s the best, don’t you think, when you’re tucked up in bed and I read to you. That’s our special time of day.’
Charlotte nodded her satisfaction and then began to play in the snow.
By the end of the day Charlotte had accepted Kate and Megan had to grudgingly admit that Kate was very good with her daughter. It didn’t alter the fact, though, that she resented her presence, and she fully intended telling Luigi exactly what she thought.
Once Charlotte was in bed Kate retired. She’d made a fuss about Megan wanting to bathe Charlotte and put her to bed, declaring that it was part of her job, but Megan had been adamant.
Luigi had provided the new nanny with her own sitting room and bedroom, opposite Charlotte’s room, so that she was on hand should she be needed quickly. This was something else Megan didn’t approve of. Why should Kate need to be so near?
Megan was silent over dinner, her anger simmering away inside her, trying to decide how best to tackle him.
‘Why don’t you spit it out?’ asked Luigi harshly. There was fire in his eyes too.
‘You know I didn’t want Charlotte to have a nanny. Was that why you presented me with a fait accompli?’
He shrugged laconically. ‘Don’t you like Kate?’
‘That’s nothing to do with it,’ she shot back. ‘You went behind my back. You knew how I felt and yet you didn’t even have the decency to talk it over with me.’
‘We’d already discussed it.’
‘You mean you told me what you’d decided. My feelings didn’t count. You’re a rat, Luigi. I don’t know what I ever saw in you. And I honestly don’t know what I’m doing here. Second to marrying you it’s the biggest mistake of my life.’ She pushed her plate away and jumped up from the table. ‘I can’t even face eating with you.’
She heard Luigi’s swift intake of disbelief before he was on his feet too, his hands on her shoulders, fingers merciless. ‘You don’t mean that.’
‘Don’t I?’ she rasped, looking angrily into the hard darkness of his eyes.
‘You know deep in your heart that it’s for the best,’ he thrust fiercely. ‘We need this time together. In fact, once Charlotte’s got used to Kate, it will do us good to go away for a few days.’
‘And leave my daughter?’ she screeched.
‘Our daughter,’ he corrected harshly. ‘And don’t think I’d dream of leaving her if I wasn’t sure that she’d be in good hands. But we need time together, the two of us, alone, completely. We need to sort out our lives.’
‘And you’ll arrange that, without consulting me yet again?’ she blazed. ‘I think not. I think you’re under a great big delusion. You think that now you’ve got me in your house you can do what the hell you like. It’s not true. I’m tougher than you think. I’ve had to be. If you don’t believe me just wait and see. If you carry on in this vein you might find one day that I’ve disappeared again.’
The grip on her shoulders tightened so much that a sharp pain seared through her bones. ‘Do that at your peril,’ he threatened menacingly. ‘What I’m doing is for your good, for our good. How the hell are we supposed to get back on an even keel with a child at our heels all the time?’
‘A child?’ Megan screamed. ‘Is that how you see Charlotte? A mere child, a nuisance! How dare you? You make her sound like a stranger. She’s your flesh and blood, Luigi. You should be delirious with pleasure. You should be glad to have her around. You should be getting to know her better.’
‘And I think,’ he grated harshly, ‘that we should work on our own relationship before Charlotte’s. Of course I love my daughter; she’s brought life to the house. She’s a beautiful, intelligent little girl and I’m proud of her. But we need to get our own lives in order.’
‘That’s rich, coming from you,’ she riposted. ‘You were the one who let our marriage down. And, to be perfectly honest, I can’t see you changing. Your answer to everything is to pay someone to do your dirty work. Including looking after your daughter. How sad is that?’ And finally, with strength born of desperation, she managed to tear free. But she didn’t leave the room. Instead she stood a few feet away, glaring at Luigi like an enraged tigress.
His eyes narrowed, becoming two glittering slits that reflected the light from the lamps. And his whole body was tense with a rage he was doing his level best to control. Not that Megan cared whether he controlled it or not. She was past caring what Luigi felt. All she was concerned about was her darling daughter’s welfare.
‘I think,’ he said fiercely, ‘that you’re blowing this thing up out of all proportion. It will do you good to have more time to yourself.’
‘And there’ll be lots of that,’ she retorted hostilely, ‘because you’ll still be working all the hours God gave. You’re all talk, Luigi. How could you possibly take time off? Everything would collapse if you weren’t at the helm.’
Her sarcasm wasn’t lost on him. She saw the muscles clench in his jaw, the way his mouth went even straighter and grimmer, and it was a second or two before he answered. And when he did his voice was deadly calm. ‘I’ve said I’ll take you away, Megan, and that’s exactly what I intend to do.’
‘And if I don’t want to come? Charlotte’s never been parted from me. I wouldn’t leave her if I thought she’d be upset.’
He brushed her doubts away. ‘We’ll give her time to get used to Kate. She comes with the highest recommen
dation; I don’t think we have a problem.’
‘And no doubt you’re paying her the highest wage,’ she retorted. ‘I truly never expected that you’d turn out like this. Money, money, money, all the time. I must have been insane to marry you.’
‘Is it a crime to want to better oneself?’ he asked icily.
‘Of course not, but there’s a limit. You’re taking things a step too far.’
‘In your eyes, not mine.’
‘So you’re happy here in this mausoleum of a home? You enjoy having other people run around after you, pandering to your every whim? Is that the pleasure money brings? It doesn’t seem like pleasure to me.’
‘So tell me, Megan.’ He cocked his head on one side and looked at her consideringly. ‘What does pleasure you?’
Her cheeks flushed beneath that knowing stare, and her heart faltered as she realised that she had left herself wide open.
He moved purposefully towards her. ‘Don’t tell me,’ he said on a low growl. ‘Let me show you.’
Before she could even draw breath she was in his arms, her mouth opening of its own volition beneath the persuasive power of his. Megan knew that she ought to protest—loudly, volubly; she ought to push him away, show him that actions like this got him nowhere. But, fool that she was, she let her senses take over.
She enjoyed the thrill of his hard, sexy body against hers. She revelled in the feelings he aroused deep within her. She wanted more. She wanted all of him! The thought set off alarm bells in her head but she chose to ignore them. Luigi had talked about catching up on the years they’d spent apart, but it was their times in bed that she’d missed. Missed without really knowing it. Was it any wonder that she’d kept herself a man-free zone? No other man was good enough. No other man could possibly arouse her to this extent. They were soulmates as far as good sex was concerned. Megan oughtn’t to have taunted him. Kissing her at this moment in time was the worst thing he could possibly do—except that she was so damned gorgeous how could he resist? Which begged the question, why hadn’t he made more of an effort to find her? Luigi knew that he could never come up with an answer. He’d been a fool. It was as simple as that. A blind fool, who thought that immersing himself in his work was the answer to everything.
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