Changing Fate (Book 3) (Piper Anderson Series)
Page 11
“Okay,” Betty relented, tossing her hands up and shrugging her shoulders. “That wasn’t my question. I didn’t ask you how Jules was acting toward you. I asked what you planned to do about it. You obviously didn’t go running after her. If she’s pushing you away, are you going to let her?”
“I don’t know that I have a choice.” Michael reached into a box sitting next to him and twirled a piece of silver tinsel around his finger. He felt like a child, having to answer for why he hadn’t turned in his homework that day.
“There are two kinds of people in the world, those who let life happen to them, and those who go make things happen. I know my daughter, and I’ve seen her make plenty of mistakes in her life. If she gets rid of you, she’ll be making another one. They say only a fool tests the water with both feet. I say, that’s the only way to ever get anywhere.”
“Even if it only gets you to the bottom of the ocean?”
“It’s better than sitting alone on a boat.” She grinned.
“I’m not sure how to do that, where to start.” Michael met Betty’s eyes and felt a layer of himself pull away. Off came the skin he’d wrapped himself in, the thick skin that covered the part of him willing to admit he missed Jules. He wasn’t going to say out loud that his arms had never felt so empty, nor his bed so cold. He missed the touch of her sharp nails running over his neck as he drove. But more than that, he missed her arguing every point with him. Having full control of the television channel and his pick of which bottle of wine to open wasn’t liberating, it was lonely.
“You know where you can start?” Betty rested her hand on his shoulder as she spoke. “You can take all these Christmas decorations back up to the attic and bring down the suitcases. We’re going to the New York.”
Chapter Eleven
“I think I’ve found her,” Bobby spoke quietly, as he stood in the doorway of the Stoneybrook apartment. The early morning knock on the door had been as much a surprise to Jules and Piper as to the nuns who had let him in the front gate. They didn’t get many male visitors here. It was actually frowned upon. But a man like Bobby, with his disarming smile and kind eyes, could not be kept out.
He took stock of the small apartment and watched as Piper tried to quickly pick up the trail of clothes Jules had left when walking from her room to the bathroom this morning.
“Found who?” Jules asked, groaning as she wiped the sleep from her eyes and fought the urge to vomit at the smell of the tray of coffees in Bobby’s hands. He had forgotten for a moment that Jules didn’t know anything about his past, that they’d built their friendship on the lies he and his parents had told when they arrived in Edenville.
“It’s a long story.” Bobby frowned, wondering how he and his best friend had morphed into what they were today, both of them quietly stepping back from each other’s lives and making room for other people to step in.
“Yeah, yeah I know you have all these deep dark secrets. I don’t really care,” she rolled her eyes and covered her nose with her fingers. “Just get that coffee out of here. It smells gross.”
“It’s the same coffee you’ve drunk for the last five years,” he said, pulling her Styrofoam cup from the tray and trying to hand it to her.
“Well apparently the baby growing inside me hates the smell of it. Get it out of here.” She slapped his hand away and he had to juggle the cup to keep it from falling. She stepped inside and tried to shut the door on him.
“What?” he stuttered, catching the door with his foot and entering the room even though the nuns had told him he was only welcome to stand in the hall. “You’re pregnant?” He wore a stunned expression and stammered for more words.
“I swear to God if you ask me if I’m sure, I’m going to deck you.” She sat down heavily on the couch and pulled a blanket up over her as tears filled the corners of her eyes.
He handed the coffees over to Piper and sat by his friend, feeling again like they had as children. He had sat by her on so many occasions, watching her go through something he’d never understand, but he’d always been willing to try to help. He rubbed her leg and he felt her pull away slightly.
“Talk to me, Jules.” Like a portal through time he felt transported back to being twelve years old as they had sat in the fort he and Jules had built and he had listened to her cry about how she had started her period. He had no idea what she was going through, but he knew her life was changed in some way. He knew she was a little scared, and that all she needed was him to be there with her. Today felt the same.
“There really isn’t anything to say,” she spoke in an almost angry tone, mad at her emotions. “I’m pregnant and it happens to be by a man who has no problem watching me leave the state. Michael is just one of those guys who can’t commit. I always pick the wrong guy. Look at you,” she said, waving her hands between him and Piper. “You followed her. You guys aren’t even together, really, and you loved her so much you quit your job and raced up here after her. Michael and I don’t have that. We’re never going to, either.”
“You don’t know that,” Bobby said, demanding with his eyes that she look at him. “Michael is worried sick about you, but he thought you were moving on or something. You’ve been acting so strange. He didn’t know if he should give you your space or not.”
“I can’t do this, Bobby.” She buried her eyes into her hands, and sobbed in a way he hadn’t heard since the day Betty sat them down and told them Stan had been killed.
“You can.” He pulled her body up and leaned her against him, brushing her wild hair down with his hand. “I don’t have the answers when it comes to Michael, but I don’t need to, because I already know everything I need to about you. This baby,” he placed his hand on her stomach and she cried a little harder, “is going to be so lucky to have you as a mother. I know you better than anyone on this planet. You can do this.”
“I’m scared,” she murmured into his shoulder, the sobbing replaced by warm tears rolling down her cheeks and pooling on his shirt. “What if he doesn’t stay, what if Ma is upset? I can’t do this alone.”
“Even if everyone else leaves, I’ll be here. Even if everyone is mad, I’ll stay. You can be afraid of whatever you want, but you don’t get to be scared of being in this alone, because you won’t be.”
“I’m going to get fat,” Jules croaked, pulling away and flopping down on her back.
“You were kind of heading in that direction anyway,” Bobby smirked, and poked at her leg, which was met quickly with a kick back in his direction.
A light knock on the frame of the still-open front door drew everyone’s attention. Bobby shot up at the sight of the nun whose stone-faced expression spoke volumes despite her silence.
“Piper, do you want to come with me? I’m going to find her.” He straightened his back and took six large steps back toward the door where the nun stood.
“I just need to get dressed,” Piper said, looking down at her pajamas.
Bobby nodded and, looking over at the firm-faced nun, spoke apologetically, “I’ll wait down in the car.” He rushed out, forgoing hugs or even goodbyes.
Bobby hopped down the big cement stairs and back to his truck. The nervous energy that had been running through his veins on his way to see Piper had now been replaced with only thoughts of Jules being pregnant. He meant what he had said; he would stand by Jules even if no one else did.
There was something so strange about realizing you were an adult. As a child he had always thought it would just be something he would wake up and be some day, but it seemed to be coming a little at a time. Adulthood was upon them and there was nothing they could do about it now. His best friend’s skinned knees and braids were gone, and now she was about to become responsible for someone else’s life. Everything he thought had made him an adult before this point melted away. Finishing college, becoming a police officer, buying his house meant nothing now. They were entering completely new territory.
He was still contemplating the new addition when h
e saw Piper approaching the car. His mind flashed for a moment to a what if, and though he tried to choke it back, he couldn’t. He heard himself ask the question, what if it were Piper who was pregnant instead? Would it force him out of these ideas? Would that be enough to put all this behind him? He shook off the thought as she pulled open the door and sat in the passenger seat, the familiar scent of her shampoo filling the car and his heart.
“That was intense,” she said, tucking her bag down by her feet. She had packed, he noticed, and that meant she was in for the long haul, which was fine by him.
“She’s going to be okay,” he assured her, putting the car in gear.
“We all are,” Piper whispered, as she stared out the window. He heard her, he knew what she meant, but he didn’t acknowledge her. All he wanted to do right now was find Jedda’s sister and learn what had become of her. Was she happy, safe? Had he done the right thing that day, after all?
“Where are we headed?” Piper asked, turning the radio from his station to hers.
“I got a lead that she lives on Block Island. There is a ferry there from Point Judith, Rhode Island. It’s a decent ride, but I figure this is the week to do it since Betty and Michael will be here next week for Christmas.”
“They will?” Piper exclaimed, clearly wondering how she hadn’t been informed of this obviously important update. “Why didn’t they tell me?”
“I don’t know, there seem to be a lot of secrets going around,” Bobby snipped, a little hurt that Piper had known about Jules’s pregnancy without telling him.
“That was up to Jules to tell you, it’s not like I’ve filled her in on all your stuff either.”
Fair enough, Bobby thought as he keyed the address into his navigation system. Three and a half hours he heard it chirp at him, and he stretched his back, readying it for another long trip.
“Any word from Connie and Marty?” Bobby asked, genuinely interested in the update. He had so much on his mind but still sitting in a corner of his thoughts was the nagging feeling that there might be more to their story.
“They call a couple times a day to see if everything is going all right. They are anxious to meet Betty and Michael. At least now I can tell them they are coming. Connie said if they come, she wants to take us all to dinner.”
“They’ve taken quite an interest in where you are and what you’re doing.”
Piper mistook the comment for a compliment and spoke without realizing she was playing into his point. “They said if Betty and Michael come they’d be putting all of us up in a fancy hotel before Christmas.”
“It seems like maybe they are trying to compensate for something. Do you think maybe they knew about you and they feel guilty?”
He watched Piper’s face dance between anger and hurt, then settle on reluctant acceptance. “Maybe,” she said quietly. “They might be really nice people who are genuinely happy to have met me and excited to grow their family. But the realist in me says that’s probably not the case. I’ve been thinking the same thing, maybe they know more about me than they are saying, or maybe they think I’m here for money and they are just being as nice as possible until the paternity test comes back and they know what they are dealing with.”
“And what if that’s the case? Are you getting overly invested, you know, emotionally?”
“Yes,” she answered without hesitation, and he knew her honesty was like an open wound. Yes, she was already too close to these people. Yes, she’d jumped emotionally head first into the chance that they were as good as they seemed, rather than too good to be true. And yes, if this all went bad she’d be devastated. Her one word spoke volumes.
“So what do you plan to do?” he asked, hoping she would let him in on something that would ease his nervousness for her.
“I plan to go with you to find Jedda’s sister. Then I plan to spend Christmas with you, Betty, Jules, and Michael, in the home of people who seem like they want me there. Then whatever happens with the paternity test, I’m going to remind myself that even if this isn’t my family or they don’t want me the way I hoped they did, I already have people who do.”
He reached over and pulled her hand from her lap and laced his fingers with hers. “That’s a good plan.” It was certainty better than the plan he had which right now consisted of his brain relentlessly combatting his heart. That day in the cabin still filled his sleep with nightmares. It still kept him from wanting to wear a badge. It still made him look at Piper differently. It was like their love was underwater. You could see it just below the surface. He could hear it screaming up at him to save it. If he jumped in soon it would still be there, but if he didn’t he knew it would sink farther down until it was lost.
He loosened his fingers and pretended an urgent splash of windshield wiper fluid was needed and tended to that instead of keeping his grip on her.
The ride flew by as they talked about their opinions on how Michael would react to the news, how Betty might feel. They laughed about whether the baby would be just like Jules, full of drama and emotions, or more like Michael, born in a business suit with a witty response as its first words. He let himself remember how easy it was to talk to Piper even when everything else in their lives was hard. There was something comforting about knowing, when they were together, there would always be something to say.
As they pulled into a parking spot by the Point Judith beach, Bobby felt the reality of this moment set in. The air was frigid and smelled of freshly caught fish. The docks were lined with boats, all rising and falling with the choppy winter sea. The streets were mostly deserted; a beach town in off-season was rarely a busy place.
They walked up to the small shack that had a sign that read, Ferry Tickets. The girl behind the window looked them over. “Are you visiting someone today? This time of year we don’t get many tourists, just residents going back and forth.”
Bobby didn’t answer. He just slid his money through the slot and pretended he couldn’t hear her.
“We’re going to visit an old friend,” Piper chimed in, nearly apologizing for Bobby’s rudeness. He was too distracted to care. He had promised himself he would not let the outcome of today dictate his life. It would be silly to base his entire future on the happiness, or unhappiness for that matter, of a girl he didn’t know. But as they approached the dock, ready to board the ferry, he felt like he’d just stepped into his own tomorrow.
“You nervous?” Piper asked, clearly already knowing the answer. He felt the circular motion of her hand rubbing his back, but it felt distant. He felt apart from himself.
Please let her be there, let her be happy. Let me be wrong, he prayed. The ferry backed off the dock and the loud horn blew, sending Piper jumping into his arms. Yes, he thought again, please let me be wrong.
Chapter Twelve
The ferry might as well have been a time machine. As they stepped off onto the island they felt as though they had been transported back in time. Piper was a bit queasy from the choppy ride and was relieved to be stepping back onto solid ground. There were very few cars here, the island small enough to walk or bike to most places. The island looked practically deserted through the winter months, but it was still beautiful. It took a little imagination, but it was easy to see how bustling this place would be in the summer. The bluffs and dunes that lined the coast of the island looked postcard-worthy.
They made their way off the ferry toward a small stand with a taxi sign on it. The man inside the booth was barely awake, his messy beard and pulled-down knit hat seemed to close his face in until he was just eyes and a nose.
“Can I help you?” he grumbled, standing up and stretching his back.
“We need a cab to Ballard’s Restaurant,” Bobby said, reading the note he had scratched down for himself.
“Sure,” the man said, looking them both over. “That will cost you about three cents.” He pointed over to the large building to their left and laughed as they both read the sign at the same time.
“Thank you,”
Bobby said with a wave as they headed for the restaurant. They walked across the long dock, boats parked on either side, and made their way to the front of the restaurant. Its weathered gray paint blended into the bleakness of the winter sky, offset only by its bright blue awnings, a small reminder that by summer the sky would be that shade again.
“Does she work here?” Piper asked, trying to match Bobby’s quick and anxious stride.
“I think so. I had a friend do some searching on social media and he told me to start here.” He pulled open the door and scanned the empty tables. The hostess, a young dark-haired girl greeted them with a smile and Bobby searched her face for a familiar feature but found none. This was certainly not Jedda’s sister.
They took a table for two and scanned the menu as Bobby’s leg shook nervously. Piper slid her foot over and braced her leg on his, calming it.
“Tell me what you know about her.”
“Her first name is still Willow. She was adopted by a family that lives here year round. She either works here or hangs out here, it wasn’t exactly clear. Last I saw her, she had dirty blonde hair and blue eyes and, I think, a birthmark just below her eye on her cheek. It looked like a birthmark, but she was in such bad shape that it could have been a bruise or a cut.”
“It’s a small island, we can ask around.”
“I don’t want her to know I’m here. Maybe she’s forgotten all of it. I won’t be the person to bring it all back.” As he spoke he heard the soft sounds of music flow through the dining area, and thought maybe the radio had been switched on now that the restaurant had some more patrons. But as he listened again he realized it was coming from a piano that was tucked in the corner. A soft voice began to sing and the smoky tone pierced his heart. It was a low jazz song that rose and fell with smooth, warm transitions. The woman’s voice drew the eyes of everyone on the wait staff, the few other people seated nearby, and people from the kitchen who stepped out to hear her.