by Eric Vall
“I seriously wish Sharron had given us a bigger boat, bro,” the imp grumbled. “We’re fucking nut-to-butt back here.”
“At least you two can fly,” I pointed out to my two nearest shipmates. “You technically don’t have to be in the boat at all other than when we’re crossing between the circles.”
“Heeeeeeeyyyyy everyone!” I heard Libidine call out from above.
I glanced up to see Liby was leading the new hires, and they were all carrying a second small boat through the sky. Their wings carried them down to us, and then they plopped the boat into the river and entered.
Inpulsa, Eve, Mirage, Deja, and Eclipse were all present, and they were all adorned in their elegant battle armor.
I had a team of badass warriors with me, and we were ready to take on whatever the Fifth Circle could throw at us.
My King, Mephisto whispered telepathically, I do not mean to question your decision making, but is it necessary to have this many succubi for this mission? We are just going to kill one Demon Lord.
“A Demon Lord who is very crafty, and who is a master strategist,” I reminded the Master of Whispers. “He’s probably got a miniature army of Daeva or Tartaruchi protecting him. Also, you heard Charon. There are going to be some pissed-off monsters in those tunnels, and I dunno about you, but I’d prefer not to end up in some giant eel’s belly.”
I see, Mephisto said with a bow, forgive me for questioning you, my King.
“It’s alright, dude,” I chuckled. “What good is a Demon Lord if he’s just gonna agree with everything I say? Surrounding yourself with brown nosers is the kiss of death for any successful leader.”
“I can second that sentiment,” Sia added. “We learned a lot about that sort of thing in my MBA classes.”
“I still can’t believe you played in the NBA, Strawberry Shortcake,” Todd mused, “I figured you wouldn’t be tall enough.”
“MBA, Todd,” the redheaded madame sighed. “It’s a business degree.”
“I know,” Todd agreed, “the fucking NBA is very serious business.”
“No,” I tried once more to explain to the imp. “What she’s saying is--”
I swallowed my words when I saw the expression on Eligor’s face.
The normally calm and composed Knight of Hell was staring over at the second boat, the one filled with my new succubi. Her eyes were wide with shock as her mouth hung open, and the color was completely gone from her face.
Eligor looked like she had just seen a fucking ghost.
I cautiously stood up in the dinghy, scooted over to where the blonde knight was sitting, and tapped her gently on the shoulder.
Eligor jumped nearly a foot in the air at my touch, and then she spun around to see what was going on.
“Wh-What’s up, Jacob?” she stammered.
“You alright?” I probed. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
Eligor’s eyes were still focused on the second ship, but she tried to regain her composure. The bikini-clad woman wiggled her torso, placed her hands on her outer thighs, and gave me a large, phony smile.
“I’m fine,” she reassured me. “I’m just a little nervous about the task ahead, that’s all. I’ve never moved that much water before.”
“You’ll be alright,” I promised. “That’s what Gula’s here for. I’ve seen you pull an entire fucking ship out of the water with your powers before. Just imagine what you’re gonna be able to do once you have a boost.”
Eligor gave me another short smile, but I could tell it was forced. Something had spooked her, and I really wanted to know what it was.
Was she worried about one of the new succubi? Surely Eligor would have told me if she was concerned about the loyalty of my new hires or if she thought one of them wasn’t up to snuff. But she didn’t seem to want to share anything further, so I figured I’d let it go for the time being.
Besides, we had a Demon Lord to kill.
“Alright, everyone.” I stood up and addressed the two boats. “It’s going to be really, really cozy on this trip, so make sure you take your seat ASAP. The plan is simple. We go into the Fifth Circle, we find the entrance to these underwater caves, and then Eligor here uses her powers to open them up for us to explore. Now, there are most certainly going to be enemies encountered on this journey, so keep your wits about you at all times. I know this is the first time some of you have worked together, but I also know you guys are a bunch of fucking badasses. We’re going to march down into the Palace of Bones, break down the door, and make Gamigin pay for his betrayal. Who’s with me?”
“Fuck Gag-a-man!” Todd called out as he raised his fist into the air.
“Hell yeah!” Libidine blurted out.
“With you till the end, Jacob!” Deja’s voice called over the cheers.
“For wrath! For ruin!” the imp exclaimed. “For Rohaaaaaan!”
The cheers stopped, and everyone looked at Todd. The little imp just giggled mischievously and then beat against his chest heartily while making a “harump” sound. The rest of the team followed suit, and I eventually had to hold up my hands to calm them down.
“I’m loving the enthusiasm, guys,” I laughed. “Now, let’s go get this bastard.”
I summoned purple Hellfire into my hands and then surrounded both of the boats in their glow. Next, I ordered them both to move forward, into the dark cave that would lead us to the Fifth Circle of Hell.
However, we weren’t going there. Not quite yet.
As we entered the dark cave, I could hear the upcoming rapids. We had to make our move before we hit them, or else we were going to lose control and end up exposed in Baphomet’s territory.
“Eligor? Gula?” I called out over the sound of the swirling water. “Are you ready?”
Two bursts of Hellfire sprang forth and lit up the dark cave, one lime green, and one brown. Suddenly, the brown flames shot over and struck Eligor’s body with the speed of a fucking bullet train. The Knight of Hell let out an intense grunt as the power-boosting spell engulfed her body and gave her a charge equivalent to a nuclear power plant.
Then I saw something I’d never seen before.
Eligor’s eyes and entire body were glowing with the same green spell that she normally summoned in her hands. The Knight began to float up into the air above the boat before she threw out her open palms and unleashed the lime green fire onto the water around us. As her elemental spell spread across the waves, the sound of the roaring rapids turned into nothing more than a slight trickle.
“Let there be light!” Todd cackled as he gave the signal.
Immediately, every single member of the team who wasn’t currently occupied called forth red flames. The pitch-black cavern lit up with a warm, scarlet glow, and we could see every single detail of the space we were in.
The walls were dripping with the condensation from the silvery, ectoplasmic water, and several stalactites were reaching down like a rocky waterfall from the ceiling. Most importantly, however, we could see underneath the water.
And there, just a few feet beneath the surface, sat the mouth of a tunnel.
“Down here, Goldilocks!” Todd called out as he tossed a miniature fireball into the water above the tunnel.
It sizzled and went out with a hiss but was immediately followed by a blast of lime green Hellfire. The second Eligor’s spell touched the murky water, it began to part like the Red Sea. Two walls of water pulled apart and exposed the opening.
“I’ll tie off the boats,” I announced. “The rest of you, get down there right now.”
I called forth my purple Hellfire, then I created a series of platforms between the boats and the opening of the tunnel. The succubi, Todd, and Mephisto quickly exited our vessel, followed the floating platforms of Hellfire, and then disappeared into the mouth of the underwater cave.
At the same time, I used my other hand to summon a bout of silver flame. I pointed it at the anchors of the first boat, liquified it, and then ordered it to stab into the
cavern walls. I repeated the action with the second boat, and then I made my exit.
I pulled myself over the side of the vessel, stepped out onto the glowing purple platforms, and then made my way down. Once I was safely standing on the wet brimstone of the tunnel, I turned back to Eligor and motioned for her to follow.
The Knight of Hell lowered herself down beside me, and then she slowly closed the two walls of water with a swish of her hand.
As I watched the massive, grayish waterfalls push together, it finally hit me.
We were now in the underground tunnels of the Fourth Circle. If anything went wrong, if Eligor were so much as to deactivate her spell for a few seconds … we were all going to drown.
There was nowhere to go now but forward.
“Alright guys,” I whispered as I tried to regain my composure, “I don’t see any branches, so it looks like there’s only one way to go from here. Remember to keep your eyes peeled. I have no idea what the fuck could be in these tunnels.”
We all activated our red Hellfire and used it as a torch to find our way through the caverns. The spells also acted as a makeshift drying system, as well. As we walked, the brimstone beneath our feet grew less and less wet.
Eligor stood at the center of the group with her hands outstretched in both directions. Her lime green fire acted as literal floodgates to the massive amounts of water that threatened to wash us away.
We continued onward for a few minutes, until we came to a large, glowing green portal that stood up against the wall of the cave. I stepped to the front of the group, turned around, and tried to explain what we were seeing.
“This is the entrance to the Fifth Circle,” I stated calmly. “Once we pass through here, we’re in enemy territory. Stay on your toes.”
“Uh, Jacob?” Libidine asked with a raised hand. “How is Eligor going to hold her spell on both sides of the portal? Won’t anyone who passes through before her just end up in the flooded caves?”
“Already on it, Libidine,” Eligor mused as she strutted up to the glowing emerald gateway. “I don’t know how long I can hold it, though. The second I step through, I want you all to run. Got it?”
Everyone nodded in agreement.
The Knight of Hell took a deep breath before she delicately raised her right foot up and slid it through the portal. She gasped with surprise, and her sound reverberated through the caves.
“Eligor!” I called out. “Are you alright?”
“The water on the other side is fucking cold!” she chuckled, somewhat embarrassed by her overreaction.
Eligor took another deep breath, and then turned to us and nodded. Finally, she pushed the right half of her body through the interdimensional gateway.
“Go! Go! Go!” Cupiditas called out, and everyone took off in a full sprint.
I felt my body go weightless as I passed through space and time, and then I landed with a dull thud on the other side. I hurried to my feet and watched as each of my friends appeared through the glowing jade doorway. Finally, once we were all through, Eligor pulled the rest of her body into the Fifth Circle.
“Holy shit,” Deja gasped. “That was like, the most badass thing I’ve ever seen in my life!”
“Thanks,” Eligor chuckled groggily as she refocused on her spell.
Although the cave system looked nearly identical to the one in the Fourth Circle, there were some obvious differences. The water here wasn’t silver or gray whatsoever. Instead, it was a dirty, murky black that matched the color of the brimstone walls. Likewise, the ground underneath our feet wasn’t as sturdy. It was wet and soft, likely thanks to the millennia it had spent underwater.
“According to Charon,” I explained, “the Palace of Bones is located all the way at the center of the Fifth Circle. These tunnels should take us there if we just continue to push on and go straight.”
“That seems way too easy, bro,” Todd protested. “There’s a whole intricate cave system underneath Hell, and we just have to walk in a straight line?”
“I never said it was a straight line … ” I retorted coyly. “There will be some bends and twists every now and again, I suppose. All I know is that we need to keep following the path in front of us.”
We pushed forward for a bit until we found our first obstacle. Once we were a good mile or two into the journey, the walls of the cave started to contain carvings that appeared to be written in a language I couldn’t read. Then we came to a fork in the road.
“Which way are we supposed to go now?” Deja pondered aloud.
“I say we just pick a side and see where it takes us,” Eclipse mused.
“Hold on there, Pink Floyd,” Todd protested. “We’re not gonna just pick a random direction. I may be a tad reckless, but I ain’t no idiot.”
“These are inferoglyphs,” Cupi confirmed as she ran her hand against the wall. “The ancient language of Hell.”
“Can you read them, Eligor?” Sia questioned.
The Knight of Hell continued to hold her lime green Hellfire on both sides as she moved in closer to inspect the wall. She squinted heavily as she tried to read the scribbles, and her face grew more frustrated by the minute. Finally, she let out a long sigh and stepped away.
“They’re too worn,” the blonde knight admitted, “also, it’s an even older version of the language than I’m used to. I’m sorry, guys, but I have no clue what it says.”
“Let me try,” a brash voice spoke up from the crowd.
Suddenly, Eve stepped out from her group with her hands on her hips proudly.
“You can read inferoglyphs?” I gasped. “Why didn’t you tell us that in your interview?”
“It wasn’t applicable,” the redhead with the wavy hair shrugged. “I didn’t really see how my language skills related to making churros.”
“I knew I shoulda gone with Survivor,” Todd muttered to himself.
Eve stepped up next to Eligor, and I heard the two of them whispering to each other. Then the blonde knight nodded, stepped away from the wall, and let Eve go to work.
“Whew,” Eve whistled, “she’s right, it is really worn. Buttttt, I think I can make out the basic gist. It says something along the lines of ‘the right shall set you free, and the left will bring you closer to what you seek.’”
“That’s definitely a trick,” I chuckled. “We’re in Hell. I know what ‘set you free’ means in this context.”
“It means--” Todd cut himself off and then began to make a series of violent hand gestures along with faces of death, all while making over the top death noises.
“Left it is, then,” Libidine sighed, and then we moved forward.
Eligor cast her spell off to the left, and then we continued through the once-submerged caverns.
We walked for about another hour, until we came to a spot where there were tunnels that spouted off in every direction.
“Shit,” I growled and inspected the walls for inferoglyphs, but there was nothing there. “Where are we supposed to go from here?”
“Normally, this is where I’d suggest we split up,” Cupiditas sighed. “But, unfortunately, only one of us can keep the water at bay.”
“I vote that we keep marching forward,” Libidine suggested. “There aren’t any notes for us to do otherwise.”
“Which one is ‘forward?’” Cupi chuckled with frustration in her voice. “There are like, four different tunnels in front of us.”
“I’m totally not walking through all of those,” Tris mused. “Worst comes to worst, I’ll just sit back here and hold my breath until you all get back.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Sister,” Gula sighed. “You might be used to holding in your smoke, but there is no way that--”
“Oh no,” Eve gasped. “Oh nononononono.”
“What’s wrong?” Inpulsa asked with concern in her voice. “Do you sense something?”
The redhead nodded her head slowly.
“Three heartbeats,” she explained, “large heartbeats. And they’re
headed right in our direction.”
“Where?” I demanded as I drew the Unhallowed Sword from my belt.
“Two are coming from below, and the other is approaching from the upper right tunnel,” Eve warned with a twinge of fear in her voice.
“These must be the creatures that Charon warned us about,” Sia mused.
“I don’t care what they are,” Cupi announced as she pulled her collapsible polearm from her belt, pushed the button, and popped it into combat mode, “if they’re coming this way, they’re going to fucking die.”
“I like the way you think!” Deja admitted as she began to swing her chain around her head.
“Girls, boys!” Sia called out. “Protect Eligor. If she loses her concentration, we are all in dire circumstances.”
The group quickly shuffled around until we were standing in a giant circle around Eligor with our weapons drawn and our Hellfire at the ready.
The only exception was Mephisto.
The tall, orange demon was floating silently above the crowd with his legs crossed and his arms extended outward. His eyes were closed, and he looked almost at peace.
“What are you doing, Great Pumpkin?” Todd hissed. “Don’t you realize there’s some crazy, Cronenberg-esque shit headed our way?”
As I told you before, Mephisto explained, I am not a “fight first” type of Demon Lord. I will assess the situation and then make my move when the time is right.
“Alright,” Todd scoffed, “get eaten by a giant-ass gator or whatever. But I’m telling you right now, I’m not scoopin’ your pumpkin seeds outta this thing’s shit.”
“They’re almost here!” Eve announced as she tightened her grip on her rapier. “Five … Four … Three … Two … ”
Before the redhead got two “one,” a loud, wall-shaking screech came from the tunnels around us. The sounds reverberated off the bare walls of the cave, and it took everything in my power to keep from falling to my knees and covering my ears.
Then I saw the bastards.