Colonization

by Scott McElhaney

  “Does it also make you nervous when I’m jumping dirt mounds on the bike?” I asked with a grin, “I noticed you weren’t really giving it your all back there.”

  He laughed and then nodded, “Yes, I’d feel much more comfortable if we both had helmets on, especially after seeing how your bike bounced and almost flipped sideways after that first jump of yours.”

  I looked down at his hand and smiled when he laced his fingers through mine. I couldn’t recall the last time someone cared about my well-being and it felt sort of nice.

  “I’ll see if I can scrounge up some helmets for us before we go out again on the bikes if that would make you feel better,” I said.

  Chapter Eleven

  We had very little to talk about since Zane had no past and I had a very limited past of my own to speak about. Without any history, the only thing we could discuss and ponder was simply the present. After the sightseeing from the ledge, we returned to the ATVs and I led him through the path that led us past my hearty vegetable garden, then to the waterfall, and then to the far side of the island where the cliffs overlooked the ocean.

  Although I wouldn’t be cliff diving today in the clothing we were wearing, I was able to show him my favorite place to jump. I also led him to the very edge of the cliff where we looked over and I showed him the best way to climb back up. I could see it in his eyes that he was reluctant to give it a try, but after he got a chance to see me jump for the first time, I was fairly certain he would join in.

  All the while, we talked and theorized about a world where we’d both be stuck on the island together forever. It was, after all, a likely scenario given what we had to work with. He had already commented on the lack of air traffic above us and the non-existent sea traffic in the distance. There literally was no hope on the horizon and that suited me just fine.

  On our way back to the house, Zane hit a tree with his front right fender, causing it to break off completely. He apologized repeatedly, to which I had to state multiple times that it didn’t matter, which it really didn’t. I could still tell that he felt bad about it, so when we returned to the shed and parked the vehicles, I intentionally bumped into him with my hip. When he turned to me, I drew him into my embrace and brought my lips to his. He was quick to accept.

  The shed wasn’t the ideal place for a memorable kiss, especially considering the musty and oily aromas around us, but I wouldn’t have changed a thing. It was memorable for me because it was the point when I think I truly fell in love.

  Now I could completely understand the scoffer who would say “you’ve known each other for all of six hours, so I don’t think it was actually love you were feeling.” And I wouldn’t blame them for thinking this because the scoffer would have been raised in a world with memories and history. And most would agree that having a history had the potential to injure and damage a person. History caused caution, fear, reluctance, and worst of all, feelings of jadedness. But Zane had no history, so his love was pure, like that of an infant. His love wasn’t tainted or adulterated. My history was very limited, so my love was equally as untainted, unadulterated, and pure. I learned nothing in the previous six hours except for the fact that every single thing about Zane appealed to me. I learned that he was sweet, innocent, and cautious, but not cautious in a bad way. I learned that he cared and needed to be cared for. I learned that he was gentle.

  How could I not love him? Answer that question and the scoffer could win their argument. But I knew that there simply wasn’t an answer, so I admitted my love in a whisper that only he could hear. He drew back, looking down at me in the limited light of the shed.

  “Really?” he asked.

  I worried suddenly that I said something that I shouldn’t have. What if it was wrong? What if he had a different definition of love and the word from my lips frightened him? Now I was suddenly worried about what I would say next. The only choice I had was to speak what my heart told me to. After all, that’s what I’d already done so far.

  “I’m sorry. I can’t help it,” I replied.

  He laughed, “You’re sorry? Why would you be sorry? I’m fairly certain that I love you too, but I didn’t know if I could speak the words without you kicking me off the island.”

  “How can you love me?” I argued before I even had time to think about it.

  “How?” he laughed again, “How could I not? I’m still shocked that you would even be single, not to mention the fact that you have just allowed me to taste your lips.”

  I looked at him, amazed at the man I saw before me. A sweet innocence just radiated from him and I wanted that all for myself.

  “So it’s okay?” I asked, “It’s okay that I love you and that you love me even though we didn’t even know each other as of yesterday?”

  He leaned back against my ATV and shrugged, “I’m perfectly happy with it if you are.”

  And so that was where we held each other and kissed for the first time as professed lovers. It would be a half hour before we left that shed and thankfully he remained a perfect gentleman the whole time. I didn’t have much faith in my own self-control at the time.

  Chapter Twelve

  After loading up a picnic basket with hot dogs, buns, condiments, potato chips, and some jars of homemade lemonade, we made our way to the beach. I showed Zane where my stash of dried firewood was. I had a hidden stack just off the path near the beach where I tossed the driftwood that washed up as well as any other old timbers I often stumbled across in my travels.

  It only took Zane about two minutes to get a good bonfire going thanks to the assistance of one of my fueled starter logs and a small blowtorch I kept in the basket. The sandy beach was much larger at the moment thanks to the low tide. It would be coming in shortly however as I noticed Kepler’s rings already creeping over the horizon. Kepler affected the tides significantly more than the moon ever did to the tides back on Earth.

  We sat down near the fire as I opened up the picnic basket and offered a jar of lemonade to Zane. He gladly accepted.

  “So, how do you spend your days during inclement weather?” he asked.

  I took the long forks out of the basket and then opened up the package of hot dogs.

  “You might think I’m a nerd, but I really love to read. I can destroy an ordinary novel in a single day. I’ve also spent some days building jigsaw puzzles like I mentioned earlier. And no, I’m not one of those weirdos that glue the jigsaw puzzle together once I completed it. I never understood that. Are they so proud of their accomplishment that they feel that no one would ever believe what they did?” I said, sliding some dogs onto the forks, “Although… I don’t always stay inside during bad weather. I’ve been known to go out to the falls to experience them at full force during a heavy rain.”

  He shook his head and laughed again, “Are you always such an adrenaline junkie? Don’t get me wrong - It’s awesome. But I don’t know that you’ll find my own bravery could really reach your standards. You might find that I’m the kind of guy who would gladly help you with that jigsaw puzzle on a rainy day, although I promise I wouldn’t supply any glue. You might discover that I’m the kind of guy who would snuggle up next to you on the sofa with a novel of my own while the thunder rattles the house and the rain hammers on the roof. What if I’m that guy?”

  I handed him a fork with two dogs on it, “I’d absolutely love to hang out with that guy. And I’d gladly share my couch-blanket with you if you wanted to snuggle on the couch and veg out reading with me. But if you saw the raging falls during a heavy rain, I highly doubt you’d be able to refrain from riding the falls.”

  He passed his fork over the bright dancing flames. I stabbed a dog onto my own fork and settled it just above the fire. I could already see from his cooking style that he was one who liked his hot dogs black. Apparently we had something in common.

  “And referencing what you said earlier, I don’t think you’re a nerd. I’m sure I would have done a lot of recreational reading in my life just based on the
fact that I’m curious to check out your library,” he said, “Unfortunately, I don’t remember anything that I’ve ever read. Or maybe that’s a good thing. I could read everything again for the first time.”

  We talked about a few of my favorite novels as we continued burning the heck out of our hot dogs. He was intrigued when I described some of the non-fiction my library had to offer as well. I’d read two books on terraforming which I highly recommended. I had also devoured a detailed book on agriculture. I explained that my unusual reading choices were meant to assist me with my own gardening here and to help me to imagine it on a much larger scale. And I’ve always been curious about the theoretical methods of terraforming.

  “Do you ever see any ships going by or any aircraft?” he asked, “I’m talking about ever. I know we hadn’t seen any since I arrived.”

  I slid my dog off the fork and onto my bun. He was already eating one of his hot dogs.

  “I haven’t seen either, but I honestly can’t say that I really ever looked. Geographically, I’m not entirely certain where this island is located on the globe or how far away it is from other lands.”

  “I’d hate to think that we were the only people on this entire moon,” he said, “Speaking of the moon, how do you know the names of all the moons or the name of that planet with the rings?”

  “Library,” I replied matter of fact, “I’ve got half a dozen books on the Tau Ceti system and its history.”

  “Tau Ceti,” he repeated, “Now there’s a familiar stellar name, although I don’t know why I know it. I’d love to read some of those books, though. Since I’m obviously here in the star system, maybe something in the books could trigger a memory.”

  We spent the rest of that afternoon just sitting on the beach and talking, mostly about stuff that didn’t really even matter.

  Chapter Thirteen

  It was a glorious three days of what could only be described as a paradise vacation. We walked around the entire island, ‘exploring the jungle’ as he called it. As expected, he did take quite well to the cliff diving. We ended up spending the better portion of a day doing only that. We didn’t get a good rain, so he never got a chance to see the waterfall as anything more than a steady trickle of water over mossy stone. We swam often, both in the ocean and in my pool. And best of all, we spent a lot of time in each other’s arms.

  He spent his nights in the spare bedroom, never once suggesting that we spend a night together. At first, this bothered me as I was more than ready for our relationship to move on to the next level. But early on the third day, he explained to me that he was worried about fidelity and not just his own. He was worried that I could be married and not even know it or that he could be as well. Although he truly loved me and I him, he still had some faith that his memory would return and that he’d suddenly discover he hurt me as much as he hurt himself.

  I understood his reservations, but I disagreed completely. I didn’t believe either of us would ever regain those missing memories. And because of this, I worried that he would never accept the way of his future.

  It was on that third day that things started to completely fall apart. We had made plans to ride the ATVs in the surf that evening. We hadn’t gone into the shed since the first day, so when Zane saw the red ATV, he was immediately taken aback.

  “How did the fender get fixed?” he asked, kneeling next to the four-wheeler.

  “Pardon?”

  “I busted the fender the other day and now it’s not only repaired, I can’t even see any evidence that the fender had ever been broken,” he said.

  He stood up abruptly, looking down at the red helmet on the seat of the vehicle. Then he turned quickly to the shelf behind him and stared at it for a moment with his hand on his hip. He stepped toward the shelf and then grabbed hold of the gas can and shook it.

  “It’s full,” he muttered almost to himself, then turned and looked over at me, “Where do you go to get more gas for these vehicles?”

  I shook my head, wondering why he was so upset all of a sudden, “I just use the gas in that can you’re holding.”

  “No, I’m talking about when you use it all and the can is empty,” he said.

  “It’s… it’s never empty,” I replied, “Why are you upset, Zane? The ATV is fixed and we have the gas we need to go for a ride. You should be upset if we didn’t have gas for the vehicles.”

  “And we also have helmets now. What’s going on here?” he demanded.

  The look he was giving me made me wonder if I should be feeling guilty of something I’d unwittingly done wrong. He set the gas can on the seat of the bike and walked over to me, seemingly very angry.

  “You wanted helmets. I don’t see why you’re so upset?” I said, stepping back as he approached, “Are you accusing me of getting the helmets? I wouldn’t even know where to go to get those.”

  “Are you real? Are you some kind of magical being… an alien?” he insisted, stopping within arm’s reach of me, “I’m on an alien moon… a place I never heard of.”

  “You’re not making sense, Zane!” I spat angrily, “I’m Sarai and everything I’ve ever told you is true. I’m human being and I live here on this island. And I most certainly don’t get upset when the gas can is full.”

  He locked eyes with me for a moment. I couldn’t tell if it was a challenge or if he was trying to read something in me. Nevertheless, I was now concerned about his sudden change in attitude and the paranoia he expressed. He then placed his hand over his eyes and shook his head.

  “I’m sorry,” he muttered with a sigh.

  “Don’t be sorry. Just tell me exactly why you are so upset. And why do you suddenly think I’m an alien? Really… an alien?”

  “Where do you get the food in your refrigerator? Where did the milk come from? What about the loaf of bread on the counter?” he asked, more calmly than before.

  Now he was suddenly paranoid about all the food I had in my house. First he was upset about the fender of the ATV, then the gas I had in the gas can. And then he was upset about the helmets. Now he was asking about the food I had in the refrigerator and the loaf of bread on my kitchen counter. I was probably more concerned about him at the moment than he was about me. From my point of view, it didn’t sound like I was the one with an alien parasite lurking inside.

  “It’s just there,” I said, “I get up in the morning and everything is just simply there. I don’t know why and honestly I don’t care. Why would I care?”

  He looked up at me and then gently cupped my face in his hand. I thought he was going to kiss me, but instead he just ran his fingers along my cheeks and then gently touched my lips.

  “You’re absolutely perfect. This place is perfect. The weather is perfect,” he said, “Don’t you ever wonder?”

  I gazed into his eyes, unsure of what I was supposed to say. Did I wonder why the weather came and went as it did? No. Did I wonder why my broken things got fixed? No. Why should I concern myself with the trivial things that didn’t really matter?

  “I believe you aren’t part of this… this charade. Maybe you are a victim as well, but don’t you wonder how things happen here?” he asked.

  He ran his fingers through my hair. He had asked if I ‘wondered’. I wondered about things, but not the same things he wondered about. For the past couple days, I wondered why a man who was perfect in every single way would wash up on my beach. I wondered why he was willing to spend his time with me. I wondered why he was willing to kiss me. And now, I wondered why he was suddenly paranoid and angry. Yeah, I wondered.

  “Wondering just leads to the usual two things that it has always led to throughout all of history. It leads to science or it leads to religion. Do you want me to say that the gods are providing for me, Zane? Or let’s go with the scientific explanation. There could be aliens sneaking into my home and providing what I need? Do either of these answers bring you peace because I can assure you that they wouldn’t bring peace to me. I really don’t want to know why things ar
e the way they are here.”

  I heard him breathe out a sigh of exasperation. Or maybe it was a sigh of resignation. It was most definitely a sigh that spoke of hurt and confusion. One way or the other, he simply wasn’t happy anymore.

  “I… I don’t like this. Don’t you see that this might be tied to my memory loss? To your memory loss?” he asked, releasing me and turning to the bikes, “I’m happy that the ATV is fixed and that we have helmets now. I’m glad we have food. But this isn’t natural. Something is definitely wrong here and I know it’s related to my memory loss. I know it.”

  He stood there staring down at the bikes for a moment. I sidled up behind him and wrapped him in my arms. His confusion had taken over him completely and I was at a loss for what to do.

  “Perhaps we should try to find out what’s going on. Maybe it will help out the both of us,” I said.

  He took a hold of my hand and turned to me, wrapping me now in his arms. I rested my head against his chest and held him.

  “Yes, I think that would be a good idea,” he breathed.

  Chapter Fourteen

  We still rode the ATVs to the beach that evening to tear up the sand and the surf, but it wasn’t quite the same after the incident in the shed. His mind was elsewhere and although he pretended to be enjoying himself, I knew he ultimately wasn’t as carefree as he once was. It actually hurt me to see him this way. I finally suggested a way that we could have a little fun while investigating his dilemma at the same time. And by that, I meant that we could damage the bikes intentionally while riding along the paths. Then we could park the vehicles by the back deck where we would sit out all night and keep watch for whomever came along to fix them. He considered this idea of mine for a moment and then conceded.

  Nightfall wasn’t too far off, so we took to the trails right away, making no efforts to avoid the trees. We took the turns sharply, drifting and sliding as we kicked up clouds of dirt. It wasn’t unusual for an ATV to come in contact with a tree or a cliff face on these speedy turns. On one instance, I completely rolled my bike, tearing off one of the rubber handle grips and cracking a fender. I wasn’t hurt at all because I could feel by the way the bike lurched that I was about to lose control. I leapt off the bike before it flipped, lightly scraping my elbow and the palm of my hand in the process. Zane was at my side almost instantly, helping me up and pouring some cool water from his water bottle over my light abrasions. It took a few minutes for me to finally convince him that I was truly alright and completely willing to ride some more. After that, we rolled my bike back onto all four wheels and hit the trails again.