The Praetorian

by Dawn L. Chiletz

  She joins Kari, who’s talking to Matt. Logan is speaking with Bryce. Bryce says something and for a moment Logan looks pissed. Then he removes his baseball cap and shrugs. He and Bryce shake hands, before Bryce walks away. Logan is alone for once. I see a chance and take it.

  “Hey, do you have a sec?” I ask as I approach him.

  “Of course. What’s up?” Logan asks.

  “I wanted to apologize to you. I certainly did not mean to act that way.”

  His eyebrows furrow and his head tilts to the side. “I feel like I’m missing something. Why is it that you think you owe me an apology?”

  “Tori told me I gave you the impression that I thought I was hot shit. I most certainly don’t think that at all and I hate it’s how I came across.”

  Logan regards Tori, who’s speaking to Kari. He gazes back at me and motions with his head for me to follow him.

  I wrinkle my nose and squint. What’s going on?

  I let Logan leave first, and when he’s a good distance ahead of me, I yawn purposefully and then slowly follow him. He’s leaning on the wall near the stairs, waiting for me. When he sees me, he walks into the dark dining room and I shadow him.

  Once we’re alone, I say, “You have my full attention.”

  “I most certainly did not say anything of the sort to Tori and I’m almost positive that Kari didn’t either. The most I’ve said to anyone about you is I’m sure we could relate well, having both served in law enforcement.”

  “That’s odd. Why would Tori say that?”

  “I’d be careful with her,” Logan adds. “She was adamant that we all vote for Naya. Neither Kari or I could stand her, but she told us you said we should and you had a good feeling about her.”

  “I’m sorry, what?”

  “When you came to the bedroom, we got a different vibe altogether. We questioned Tori and she said something must have changed and we should definitely listen.”

  My face contorts into complete confusion. “That’s really odd. Well, damn. I’m glad I finally talked to you. Thanks for the heads up.”

  He scrunches his baseball cap in his hands and runs his hand through his hair.

  “I think it’s the first time I’ve seen you without one,” I say, gesturing at the hat.

  “I can’t wear them anymore. Direct orders from the boss.”

  “Esto?” I ask.

  Logan smirks. “Creed. He thinks it’s unprofessional.”

  I shake my head.

  “I’m going to get some sleep. So you know, Kari doesn’t think you’re a bitch either.”

  “It seems you two have known each other forever.”

  “Really?” he asks uncomfortably. “That’s weird. Anyway, g’night.”

  “Goodnight, Logan.”

  After as he leaves, I pull out a chair and sit alone in the dark. It’s nice to be alone for once and I need a minute to think. I hear voices down the hall. They get closer and then, after a few minutes, it’s completely silent.

  I close my eyes and lay my head on the table. I just need to rest my eyes for a second.

  “He said it’s a symptom of the TBI. It’s not uncommon.”

  Voices nearby stir me. I lift my head and wipe drool from my cheek. I must have dozed off. I glance at my watch. It’s 2:47 a.m.

  “It breaks my heart. No one should have to live that way.”

  “I don’t think there’s any other option. I just wonder why it keeps happening.”

  I don’t recognize either of the voices in the hall and I don’t move for fear of alerting them to my presence. I find myself straining to hear what they say. It sounds like they’re moving away.

  “Hopefully the blood they took will give them a clue.”

  “Let’s hope so. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “G’night, Ms. Natalie.”

  Natalie? I slowly push away from my chair and tiptoe to the doorway. Glancing left I see flash of long red hair as it turns the corner.

  I move cautiously down the hall. Keys rattle, then a door closes. I’m almost at the end of the hall on the left.

  I pass the kitchen, the bathroom, and the laundry room. I’ve never been this far into the house. Peeking around the corner, I see a large burly man reading a newspaper next to a closet. Is he a guard? If he is, why is he guarding a closet? Where did Natalie go and more importantly, who in the hell is she?

  “Welcome to week two of The Praetorian.”

  Bryce moves to the center of the forum and a camera follows him. It’s only the third day, but he’s speaking in terms of air dates. I take another sip of coffee as I watch him on the monitors in my dressing room.

  “He’s a great host,” Clark says, taking a bite from his bagel.

  “Yeah.” I crashed hard last night and woke up later than usual. After checking in with Natalie, I took a long run. Clark and I are eating a late breakfast. I feel rested and ready to start this day.

  “Without further delay, let’s have Jean Paul Beck tell you a little about today’s challenge.”

  JP enters the forum. I can’t wait to get out of this house for a while. I’m starting to go a little stir crazy.

  “Today we’re going to discuss the ins and outs of getting your principal in and out of a car. In professional terms, we call this embus and debus. As an EPO, your job is to safeguard your principal everywhere he goes. This most often involves events and performances, but it can also revolve around a dinner out or a trip to the mall.”

  JP moves directly in front of Logan, who’s not wearing a hat today. I can see his eyes. No more hiding, Logan.

  “Many of you have experience in the area of protection, but most often you were either protecting yourself or working toward a target. When you’re guarding an individual, there is a place you want to stand. Who can tell me where they think that might be?”

  Kari’s hand is the first one up.

  “Kari?”

  “You want to stand behind your principal, to their left or right, depending on where the threat could be coming from or which side your firearm is located.”

  “Excellent,” JP says, snapping his fingers and pointing at her. “For the purposes of the show, we won’t be armed, but in real life, you most definitely will be. Kari could you join me for a second?”

  Kari stands and makes her way to him. They move to the center of the room.

  “If Kari were my principal, this is where I’d stand. Why? So if there’s a threat to her, I can do this.”

  JP pulls her back and down and covers her with his body as he moves.

  “Thanks, Kari.”

  She returns to her seat. I almost forgot she already does this for a living. I make a mental note to expect great things from her.

  “Today is a three-part challenge. In a few minutes, we’ll be traveling to a special location, where you will learn all about inspecting a car before your principal uses it. In part one of the challenge, you’ll be required to inspect a vehicle for potential risks. When I say risks, I’m referring to items in or on the car that don’t belong, not mechanical deficiencies, although that would be a bonus as an EPO. You will not observe each other, and you will not be told how many threats might be present. You’ll need to remove those threats, assuming you find any. You’ll be judged on how well you inspect and what you see.”

  I zoom in to see their reactions. Matt looks nervous, but after last night, who could blame him? He’s got a lot to prove. And Reed… Reed looks as confident as ever. She’s wearing jeans today and a button-down navy-blue Henley. Her hair is pulled tight, as usual. She’s not wearing makeup, but she still makes my heart constrict. I hate that I can feel that way just looking at her. Now that I have a visual of her in her underwear, it’s hard to stop undressing her with my eyes. I force myself to look away.

  “In the second part of the challenge, you’ll practice embus and debus with Roman. Again, this refers to getting him in and out of a car. Is that all I have to do, you ask? No. We’ll also be explaining your job as a
passenger EPO in a car someone else is driving. Who controls the radio, the temperature, the conversation? We’ll review all these things before you attempt this with Roman. Make sure you impress him. He’ll score you himself on this one.”

  JP moves again to the opposite side of the room and places his hands on his hips.

  “The second part will definitely impact the third. In the final part of the challenge, you’ll be driving an obstacle course and working on 180-degree turns. You’ll practice on simulators first and then get two attempts to show us your best moves in the shortest amount of time. Points will be deducted for the number of cones you run over. Oh, and you’ll have to pick up—how should we describe this?—a Roman imposter. More on that later. Bryce?”

  I stand. “Time to go,” I say to Clark. He claps his hands together enthusiastically. I know he’s excited to watch today, but I can tell he’s biting his tongue. I barely have any lines. I can respond however I want to, and I know he’s praying I’ll keep it together in front of the cameras. “Stop worrying. I’ve got this.”

  We leave the forum. After yesterday, I know he’s afraid I’m going to bail. I’m not a quitter. I never have been, but he worries about everything all the time. Maybe it’s one reason I haven’t been stressed. He handles it.

  Everyone has already boarded the limo buses outside. Seamore Productions spares no expense to make great TV.

  Dawson opens a door to my SUV as he speaks into his headpiece. “Patch embus.”

  I slide across the seat and Clark sits next to me. Dawson sits directly in front of me, as expected. A change of scenery will be good for all of us.

  I’m able to practice my driving skills on a simulator for a good hour-and-a-half while the group is learning how to inspect a car and then completing part one of the challenge. The production company got permission to use the facility, owned by some bigshot from Seamore, for the event and brought in special simulators for the challenge. I watched the instruction for filming purposes, but I wasn’t about to stand around all day viewing them search cars, so JP and Esto made up something about me having to take a business call.

  The simulators were programmed especially for the game, mimicking a real-life situation where an EPO would have to drive defensively. If it’s anything like the real thing, I’d make a great bodyguard. I try to get Dawson to show me his skills, but he only shakes his head and blows me off. I think he’s afraid I’ll beat him.

  “Roman, they’re ready for you,” Clark announces as he enters my simulator.

  The contestants must have already completed the first section and be ready for part two.

  Following Dawson, I’m temporarily blinded by light as we head back outside. The contestants circle a car and cameras are being placed strategically.

  JP approaches me. “Hey, I’m going to embus you myself for show after I explain proper car etiquette for EPOs. You game?”

  “Yep. I’ve been forced into a car a few times.”

  He smirks. “Are you clear on the judging criteria?”

  “Situation aware, positive control, space, communication…”

  JP seems surprised.

  “I pay attention.”

  “Hi.” I hear her meek little voice before I see her.

  I prepare myself for what’s to come.

  “Um, I need to do a few touchups. Outdoor makeup is a little different from indoor,” Jen says. Her hair is in a ponytail today, but it’s loose, with strands framing her face. She leads me to a chair, where she applies eyeliner, powder and something on my lips.

  “I’m going to need a mirror,” I say. “I’m not sure what you’re doing to me, but if you put lipstick on me, I’ll need a rag too.”

  Handing me a mirror, she says, “Just a bit of tinted matte. So you don’t look pale.”

  I nod after seeing it’s mostly natural. She goes to work spraying my spiked hair. God forbid the wind moves it.

  After she finishes, I join the group. Tori, Kari, and Reed are standing with their backs to me and the beautiful display of tight asses in jeans makes me want to draw. I close my eyes and breathe. Future employees. Future employees. I repeat it in my head until I feel more professional. Why couldn’t they be ugly? That would make this a whole lot easier.

  “It’s a beautiful day here at Kingston Roadway,” Bryce says. “The contestants will now demonstrate their skills with our principal.”

  He’s still dressed in a suit. I wonder how many he owns. It’s all he ever wears.

  “Jean Paul, we’re ready for you to explain part two of the challenge to the contestants.”

  “Thanks, Bryce. Embus and debus are two words you’ll hear quite frequently when it comes to your principal. Travel is a necessity and always an area for concern. As an EPO you always need to be proactive and forward-thinking. It only takes a second for something to go wrong, so it’s important for you to always be situation aware.”

  He opens the car door. “When placing your principal inside, you always want to have your arms in a position to shield them. You’ll see I have one hand on the door and the other on the frame. In this way I have control over access to my principal. We call this grip, positive control, grip.”

  A camera is trained on me. I make it sure it seems like I’m interested in what JP is saying.

  “You should always be watching over your shoulder. Once your principal is inside the vehicle, close the door, observe the surroundings, and sit directly in front of him in the passenger seat. What goes on inside the vehicle? Is your principal comfortable with the temperature? Do they want the music on or off? Should the driver engage the principal in conversation? Everything is your responsibility. Roman, would you join me?”

  The contestants seem to straighten as I pass them. I kinda like it. I try not to make eye contact with Reed but damn it, I can’t help myself.

  JP demonstrates how to get me in and then out of the car twice before the contestants draw numbers on who will go first. They’ll get me in the car, we’ll drive for a few minutes and then they’ll get me out. My job is to observe how they handle themselves and follow instructions.

  After they pull numbers, the contestants wait inside until it’s their turn. Dawson speaks to the driver. He’s one of ours, but I can tell Dawson doesn’t like this part. He can’t be in the car and he’s all about control. What could go wrong?

  He thought he was being funny, but saying in front of the group that I couldn’t keep the cardboard cutout of him to sleep with at night was embarrassing as fuck. Why would Roman do that? My time getting him in and out of the car went smoothly and I was extremely professional.

  During the driving challenge, we had to drive down a straightaway, pick up a cardboard Roman, place him in the car and navigate an obstacle course, making two 180-degree turns, like we’d practiced in the simulators. This part of the challenge was all about negotiating corners with speed and evasive maneuvering. I thought I did pretty well. I drive fast and handle a car well. As a cop, I do it all the time.

  But when it was over, and I was removing cardboard Roman, he goes and says that shit in front of everyone.

  “You’ll have to give me back, Reed. I know how much you’d like to keep it to sleep with at night, but there’s only one of me and you have to share.”

  What pisses me off even more is that his comment took me by surprise and I had no response. I can think of fifty things I should have said, now that it’s over, but all I did was glare at him.

  I wish I would have said, “Cardboard or real, you’ll never get in my bed.” But I didn’t and as I sit here, waiting for the results in the forum, I’d like to march up to him and tell him to fuck off. I wish I never would have kissed him. Ever since, he’s treated me differently. He thinks I want him or something. Obviously I misjudged him. First chance I get, I’m setting that record straight.

  He’s sitting on his throne, all smug and high and mighty. So he wrote a few songs. That doesn’t make him a god. Raul was right. He is a pompous asshole, although I’d
never say it out loud. I need to win this game and get that money. He can take the job and shove it down his throat.

  His eyes move to mine and he smirks. I turn away. I hope that gives him a great big fat hint. I’ll guard him for this show, but I hope he gets run over by a herd of elephants as soon as I’m gone.

  Esto has been running back and forth, from the front to the back of the room, for the last fifteen minutes. Everyone is getting antsy. It’s dinnertime and it’s been another long day. My nose hurts. I think I got too much sun.

  Cedric notices me rubbing it and smiles.

  “Do I look like Rudolph?” I ask.

  “You look like you got some color. It suits you.”

  “Thanks. How many bags did you find?”

  “You mean the plastic baggies inside and outside the car? Six. You?”

  “Six? Oh shit. I only found three.” I let loose a big breath. I thought I’d done well today. Had I screwed up?

  “Maybe it was different for everyone.”

  “Stop trying to make me feel better,” I tell him.

  He leans back in his chair and Raul speaks up. “I found five.”

  “Fuck,” I respond, tightening my ponytail.

  “You always do that when you’re nervous, huh?” Raul asks.

  “No. I don’t think so. No.”

  He leans over me to smile at Cedric. Cedric is grinning. What is it with men today? I need a drink. To my right, Bobby gives me a thumbs-up. I genuinely smile at him.

  I want to laugh when I think about his driving challenge today. We were being timed. When he picked up cardboard Roman, he literally threw him in the backseat and closed the door on his leg. He had to open the door and push him in twice. The entire group was in hysterics, including Roman. I’m surprised he laughed and didn’t get mad. It couldn’t have scored him points though. Comic relief and stress-reducing points, definitely yes.

  Once filming finally begins, we’re joined by two Roman guards, who stand on either side of Roman and his highfaluting throne. We’re called up to stand on shields, like last time. First up is Tori, then Matt, Bobby, and me.