The Perpetual Quest for the Perfect Life

by Pace, Michelle

  The table erupted in a combination of gasps, applause, and pandemonium. After Angela’s two teenage boys, she’d had a series of miscarriages. It instantly became clear that there were two camps around the table—those for another pregnancy, and those against it.

  After what seemed like minutes of roaring chaos, John Harper stood and placed one silencing hand in the air. It was rare for him to assume the role of authoritarian now that his children were grown, but he was still effective at it.

  “Harpers! This is an occasion for celebration,” he decreed. His wife looked unconvinced and was the only person who dared to challenge the statement.

  “But is it safe? There have been so many times when things have not come to fruition.” Her husband and oldest daughter sighed simultaneously.

  “It’ll be fine, Sandra. Angela is twelve weeks along. The scariest part is over,” Dean replied confidently. His sons stared at him with conflicted looks on their faces. Avery felt for the boys; they’d watched their mother go through hell to expand their family.

  Turmoil ensued. Avery saw Nicole sit back and watch like a spectator and figured she had worked up a pretty good buzz on the beer and wine. Coming from a single-parent family and being an only child, Nic had confessed she’d never gotten used to the mesmerizing display of their family’s rows. Ike ignored the entire scene and continued to dip his pickle into his mashed potatoes.

  “What do you think, Aunt Nicole?” Anna’s twelve-year-old face looked serious. Everyone turned and waited for her response.

  “I think life is too short to not make yourself happy,” she replied after a small pause. You could have heard a pin drop in the room.

  “Here, here!” John agreed, lifting his glass and taking a sip. Sandra rose from the table and melodramatically ran crying from the room. Nicole sighed and looked at Avery who shrugged and tossed back what was left of her wine.

  Later, the adult children were gathered around the fireplace enjoying dulcet tones of silence as the kids played far away in the rec room. John had gone to do his husbandly duty of consoling his wife in a noble attempt to get her to come back to her own party.

  “Well, that was a fucking disaster.” Avery poured herself another glass of beer.

  “Language, Avery,” Angela corrected.

  “Sorry, Ang. A goddamn, son of a bitchin’ disaster.” Avery grinned, pleased with herself. Angela sighed and Mitch snorted appreciatively.

  “I am truly sorry, everyone. I thought it was great news.” Dean’s earnest expression and tone were part of his charm. He wrapped his arms protectively around his wife.

  “Of course it is, Dean.” Jo frowned as she continued to rub her husband’s shoulders. “We just worry, that’s all. We don’t want anything to happen to Angela. Your boys looked scared out of their minds.”

  “I think it’s wonderful,” Nicole chimed in again. “You wouldn’t be doing it if it didn’t mean a lot to you and if you weren’t sure it was safe.”

  Dean looked just the slightest bit uneasy at her comment and Avery picked up on it right away.

  “Is there something you’re not telling us?” Avery caught her older sister’s eyes. When her sister paused, she knew she was onto something.

  “Jesus Christ, Angela,” Avery spat angrily, sitting up on the edge of her seat ready for battle. Mitch held up a hand to intervene and his sisters ignored him.

  “No. Just one of His servants, Avery,” Angela replied. Out of the corner of her eye, Avery saw Nicole cover a smile hearing the lame attempt at a comeback.

  “She’s having twins,” Dean volunteered, again silencing the group.

  “Oh my …” Jo instantly became paler than usual. They all knew pregnancy was riskier with multiple births. No one said anything for a few moments and Angela seemed incensed.

  “Avery, if you focused on your own private life, you wouldn’t still be single.”

  Avery felt as if her sister had kicked her, and smoldered. Nicole and Jo’s mouths fell open. Dean and Mitch were literally positioning themselves between the two sisters.

  “Okay, that’s enough.” Jo’s tone had the same effect on the adults in the room that it had had on her daughters earlier that night. “This is supposed to be a welcome home to Nic and Ike.”

  John and Sandra appeared at the door, arm in arm. Sandra looked at the group apologetically. Avery saw from her father’s expression that he knew something was amiss.

  “Thanks for the party, Ma. Mitch can you give me a ride home?” Avery’s rage was bubbling under the surface.

  “Yep,” her brother responded, instantly jumping to his feet.

  Poor Mitch, Avery thought. He’d always despised confrontation and was a natural peacekeeper. They were out the door before anyone had time to utter a word.

  Warmth and sunshine persisted as Nicole pulled Ike from his car seat at Foster’s Farm. Avery helped Lauren remove her two little girls from the back of Lauren’s minivan. Avery was particularly somber today and had not called Nicole since she’d left her parents’ home so abruptly the night before. Nicole knew better than to hound Avery; she had always been one who needed to retreat and lick her wounds.

  Nicole’s astonishment was blatant as she gazed around the farm. So much had changed since she’d hung out here in her youth. In addition to the paved parking lots, the remodeled foursquare home had a brand new wraparound porch. Someone had gone to a lot of effort and expense to remodel the red barn and build two new steel buildings. Rows upon rows of Christmas trees waited patiently for December, while the pumpkin patch and corn maze stole all the attention. Avery and Lauren led the kids to the petting zoo area and Nicole proceeded on her mission to shop for her autumn tablescapes.

  She wandered amongst the cornstalk bundles and the fall plants and gourds, practically drooling at the wide selection. She’d seriously underestimated the variety of décor options Foster’s Farm could provide. She’d already filled one basket and was trying to juggle a second, when a familiar voice rang out behind her.

  “Hey, good lookin’. Come here often?” Every nerve in her body sparked at the sound of his voice, which had always reminded her of a sexy deejay. She turned slowly with an impish smirk on her face before she even saw him.

  “No, it’s my first time.” Nicole fought to keep her cool. Aaron Foster stood looking down at her and his bright, dimpled smile was like warm sunshine after a week of cloudy days. Breathless, she wasn’t prepared for her physical response to him.

  “That’s not what I heard,” he teased. That rapier wit of his hadn’t dulled a bit, even with the passage of time. As he casually leaned against the table, she noticed his looks, too, seemed untouched by the years. He towered over her, ruggedly handsome with broad, masculine shoulders and muscular arms. Aaron oozed virility with his raw strength. He had a thick head of dark hair, streaked blonde from his time in the sun. The only thing different about him was that he now sported well-kept facial hair, which framed his dimples. She decided it suited him.

  “You haven’t changed a bit.” She shot back and turned away with a coy flip of her hair. Astonished by her own behavior, Nicole felt giddy; she hadn’t flirted with anyone in years. With Aaron it came naturally, like breathing.

  “Neither have you.” She turned back to see his forest-green eyes looking her up and down from behind his dark lashes. Heat shot through her like lightning. She nervously tried to clear her throat as his mouth twitched with a smirk. His pointed to her White Stripes t-shirt.

  “Still listening to shitty music, I see.”

  Her eyes narrowed, but her lips curled in amusement at his taunt.

  “Not all of us are into lounge lizard crap like you are, Aaron.”

  “Ouch. You’re still so mean.” He held his chest as if she’d shot him, and she bit the inside of her lip.

  “So … Foster’s Farm. Quite an operation you have here.”

  “Yeah, we get by.” He shrugged, but it was obvious he was being modest. The farm was a flurry of activity and crowds
of people swarmed the buildings. Lauren had told her that in addition to the trees and pumpkins and other assorted goods, he supplied all the organic herbs and eggs to every restaurant within twenty miles and had many residential customers as well.

  “We get by? So you’re married now?” She smiled in a vain attempt to mask her disappointment. Aaron laughed and shook his head as if she were crazy.

  “No. I’m in business with Mom and Dad. They still own the ‘big house’ and a quarter of the land. The rest is split between us kids. I bought the shack across the way.” He nodded in the direction of the old cottage where they had spent many nights as kids. ‘The party shack’ had been a mecca of cheap wine and bad beer. It brought a smile to her face imagining him living there. The fact that he was still single was particularly interesting, and she filed that bit of information away.

  “I bet you were able to pay for a remodel by cashing in all the bottles you found inside,” she joked, and he grinned appreciatively.

  “Want a tour?” He took one of her baskets, as if it weighed nothing. His intense gaze sent more tingling through her. She blushed and he seemed to notice, cocking an eyebrow.

  “I -I would love one. But I need a few minutes. I’m on the hunt for décor for Stone Valley. Avery has me decorating for the holidays.”

  “So it’s true. You’re back to stay?” His voice was casual. She nodded.

  “I bought the loft across from The Old Mill.”

  “Oh yeah? Great bones in that place.” He leaned in to take the other basket from her. For a moment, he was so close she could smell his musky cologne. The scent and his nearness made her feel like a caged animal. She realized she was holding her breath and exhaled a little too loudly, thankful for the noise from the other shoppers.

  “You should come by and see what I’ve done with it.” The words were out of her mouth before she had formed the thought.

  “It’s a date.” His tone was innocent enough, but she could see one of his dimples appear. In school, she’d given him a hard time about his dimples being a ‘tell’ and insisted he never gamble.

  “I’ll take these to the cashier. Finish shopping and I’ll find you.” He disappeared into the crowd. Nicole stood watching after him for a moment.

  “What just happened?” she muttered to herself. As she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, she realized her hand was shaking.

  “What the heck happened at the dinner party?” Lauren asked Avery as they leaned against the wooden fence. “I can’t stand the tension for one more second, so spill it.”

  “My family thinks I’m an old maid.” Avery continued to stare straight ahead at the kids petting the goats. “Well, Angela does.”

  “That’s ridiculous. Angela is such a cow. It’s so worth holding out for the right guy.” Lauren tossed some food pellets to the animals.

  “True. But you had to wait, what … four years to meet your Prince Charming?” Avery tossed her a sideways glance.

  “Avery … we both know you could have any guy you want in this town. If you don’t want any of them, maybe it’s time you expanded your search.” Lauren turned to look her in the face. Avery stopped feeding the animals and looked at her friend.

  “I think Jason’s poisoned me against men for a while. I want the whole package, but I’m not going to settle.”

  “Then don’t. But the only reason you would be this pissed is if you believed there was a grain of truth to what Angela said.”

  Avery thought about this for a bit as Lauren chased the kids who were running after a crazy-eyed goat. She wasn’t old, but she was at an age where her peers were having kids and she was beginning to feel left out. When she thought of dating again, it made her cringe. Going through the whole ritual of courting seemed tiresome. Yet, as she watched the three little towheads running around, she felt overwhelmed with envy.

  Ashamed for feeling vulnerable, she squared her shoulders and lifted her chin. She was a proud woman and thrived on challenges. Workaholic or not, if anyone could have their cake and eat it too, it was Avery Harper. Step one was to stay away from losers like Jason Gates.

  Remembering she was on Ike patrol, she jumped the fence and joined Lauren in the task of corralling the children.

  When Lauren and Avery finally rejoined Nicole, she was paying for her items.

  “Okay. We’ve done the petting zoo and picked out pumpkins, but Ike wants Mommy for the corn maze and the hayrack ride,” Avery informed her. She spotted Aaron as he approached them.

  “Hey. Are you taking us on a hayride or what, Old McDonald?” she asked Aaron, as if he had been a part of the entire conversation.

  “That can be arranged.” He gave Nicole a sideways glance that was almost undetectable.

  “Good. Nothing less than the best for Mr. Ike.” Avery picked up Ike who immediately reached out for Nicole. Avery watched Aaron look Ike over with amusement. His expression suddenly changed as if he’d been stung. His smile vanished and his eyes darted away. She realized she was witnessing the moment he recognized Ike’s startling resemblance to Ryan.

  As they approached the hayrack, Ike’s eyes lit up.

  “Train!” he exclaimed, causing Nicole to giggle.

  “No, honey. Tractor,” she explained. He repeated her and stuck his thumb in his mouth. They all climbed aboard. Nicole sat toward the front with Ike. They tooled around the massive farm and the kids shrieked as they saw various scarecrows and other Halloween paraphernalia. Throughout the ride, Aaron and Nicole continued to steal glances at each other. At first Avery thought she imagined it, but after about the third time, Lauren turned to her with a bemused look on her face.

  “What the shit?” Lauren started and after a dirty look from her daughter, continued, “What the heck was that?”

  “What?” Avery asked, already knowing the answer.

  “Them,” Lauren whispered, nodding her head in Nicole’s direction. Avery shrugged, but continued to observe them closely.

  The hayride long over and the corn maze behind them, it was time to pack the kids up and head home. Avery had expected to take Ike with her since Nicole had a car full of items for the clubhouse. This had been the plan from the beginning, but now she felt slightly leery about leaving Nicole to her own devices. It was silly, she told herself. It’s not like they were kids anymore. Aaron wasn’t going to roofie her apple cider. Yet there was the part of her that couldn’t see past the fact that Nicole was Ryan’s wife. Lauren honked at her and waved her hand bossily and she pulled out onto the road on impulse.

  “I guess you’re on your own, Nic,” she murmured as she took off down the road. A minute later her cell phone rang. It was Lauren.

  “Wow. Are you as weirded out as I am?” she asked.

  “I thought it was just me.” She looked in the rearview mirror at her brother’s little clone, whose eyelids were drooping.

  “It’s unexpected, but if you ask me, it works,” Lauren stated and then honked her horn. “Ugh! Stupid deer! I’m hanging up now.”

  Avery hung up and tossed her phone in her purse. After brooding over the perception that Nicole was moving on with her life, her thoughts turned to how she wasn’t moving forward with hers and she decided that her sister was onto something. It was time to stop worrying about everyone and everything else, and time to focus on her own life.

  Aaron headed for Nicole, who was carefully arranging the last of her purchases in her Jeep.

  “Still want that tour?” Though he’d heard she was back in town, it was a jolt to spot her at the farm. Aaron recognized her from 50 feet away. Her hair had always reminded him of sweet honey butter and he would have been able to pick that body out of a line up. She turned to him and fixed him with her gorgeous gaze.

  “Sure.” Her full lips curved in a soft smile. He realized he was staring into her fascinating eyes and grasped for something to say.

  “Ike looks so much like Ryan,” Aaron blurted, immediately embarrassed by the loaded comment. Nicole glanced at the ground, then back
at him.

  “Yes, he does.”

  Aaron cleared his throat, trying to remove the frog that threatened to choke him. He tried not to think about the way they’d left things. The way he’d been frozen out by Ryan, and by her.

  “Where would you like to start?”

  “I want the VIP tour. I would love to see what you’ve done with the shack.”

  Aaron nodded and her smile broke through the wall he’d actively tried to build between them. As they crossed the road toward his home, they made small talk along the way about his business. He found that all of Nicole’s flatteries made him feel surprisingly proud of what he’d accomplished. He’d often doubted his choice to return to Jefferson Point after earning his degree in business. He’d abandoned a successful career at a Fortune 500 company in St. Louis to come home and help when his parents were in danger of losing the family farm. In retrospect, the change had been good for him, and he was happy his business plans played a role in his family’s reinvigorated success.

  “Wow, this place looks completely different.”

  As they approached the cottage, he tried to remember what it looked like before he’d made the transformation. He’d taken their old drinking shack and remodeled it to be a quaint three-bedroom home. His German Shepherd greeted them at the door.

  “Castle, heel. Don’t worry, she won’t bite you.”

  “Hi, gorgeous.” Nicole knelt down to pet his dog, who accepted the attention enthusiastically. Aaron was floored. Castle usually growled at guests for a bit before deciding they could stay. The dog trotted off and plopped onto her mat by the fireplace. He ushered Nic inside and followed her as she wandered from room to room. Nicole proceeded into his kitchen, gushing about the backsplash and appreciating his choice in cupboards.

  “You’re such a girl,” he teased as she cooed about the window treatments. She narrowed her eyes at him and flashed him a mischievous smile.

  “I’m impressed. Ha! That’s where Avery puked her guts out!” She pointed to the floor in the corner of his dining room.