Dancer in Lingerie: Lingerie #13
Page 14
“What?” I asked.
“A family.” He touched my shoulder gently before he pulled away. “Just be patient. The right guy is out there looking for you.”
That mythical man was nowhere to be found. And the man I was currently sleeping with certainly wasn’t the one. “I hope you’re right.”
I still hadn’t heard from Bosco, which was unusual since we talked every few days. Now four days had passed without a word from him.
I wondered if he’d gotten bored with me.
I decided to call him as I sat on the couch, wool socks on my feet and wearing a baggy sweater.
He answered almost immediately. “Beautiful.” It was quiet in the background, making me think he was home.
“Bosco.”
He chuckled slightly. “It doesn’t matter what context it is, hearing you say my name is the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”
Maybe he wasn’t bored with me, after all. I wondered why he hadn’t called, but I refused to ask. That would make me seem clingy, and I didn’t want to be clingy with him. He was the worst man in the world to feel attached to. Not only would he break my heart, but he would destroy me. “Are your men following me around?” I asked the question that was on my mind, pretending that was the only reason I was calling. I was too proud to invite him over, to tell him I missed him.
He was quiet for a while, drawing out the silence before he finally gave his answer. “Yes.”
I knew he would be honest, so I didn’t expect any other answer. There was no way that man had interfered by coincidence. There had been no one on the sidewalk just a second before, and then out of nowhere, that man appeared.
“I won’t apologize for it. I won’t justify it. If it pisses you off, I don’t give a damn. I just want to be upfront about that to save you some time.”
I didn’t expect anything else. “How long have you had your men following me?”
“Since the beginning.”
“Why?”
“To keep your safe, obviously. I have ten men tailing you at all times.”
“Ten?” I asked incredulously.
“Yes,” he said unapologetically. “Maybe I’ll make it twenty after what happened the other day.”
So he did know about it. “Who was he?”
“You don’t want to know.”
He was right, I didn’t.
“But I took care of it personally. Don’t think about him again.”
“What does that mean?” I asked, unsure if I wanted the answer.
“I stabbed him to death and left him in a dumpster.”
I closed my eyes, cringing at the gruesome image in my head.
“And don’t feel bad about it—trust me.”
The man probably deserved it. I didn’t want to know what his crimes were. But if he’d really wanted to take Luca away from me, he deserved the gruesome death he’d experienced. “I’m starting to wonder if Florence is the most dangerous place on earth.”
“No, not even close. But there are bad men everywhere. You’re fucking one of them.”
He had me there.
“Are you angry with me?” he asked, his voice suddenly softer.
“No.” If that intervention saved Luca, I should only feel grateful. That little boy was pure and innocent. If anything ever happened to him, I would lose my shit and go ballistic. I would stab a man twenty times before leaving him in a dumpster.
“You’re always safe with me, Beautiful—even when I’m not there.”
Even as I sat in my apartment, a sense of relief washed over me. It cleansed my heart and my blood, made me feel at peace with the world. Even if there were a murderer lingering outside my apartment, he would never get to me. When I had a man like Bosco in my life, I never had to feel scared again.
“As I’ve told you, you can walk the streets naked if you want—nothing will happen to you.”
I believed it.
“Walk home in the dark. Do whatever the fuck you want. You’re my woman—and you’re untouchable.” Like the conversation was over, he hung up on me. He didn’t ask to see me or try to come over. He was possessive with me but then cold. It didn’t make any sense.
I almost called him back—but my pride wouldn’t allow it.
“Who the hell is that?” I whispered to Vanessa as we stood in front of the painting while nodding to her desk.
A large man sat there, dressed in a collared shirt and dark jeans. He didn’t look like the kind of man that belonged in a gallery, not with those cold looks and extremely short hair. He reminded me of Griffin—grim and angry.
Vanessa didn’t follow my gaze. “My new assistant.”
I gave her an incredulous look, not buying that story one bit.
She rolled her eyes and walked out with me as we headed to lunch. “Griffin doesn’t like me being here alone. He knows he needs to be at the winery, so he had me hire an assistant…but he doesn’t actually help me.”
“He just protects you.”
“Yep.” She walked beside me and turned into the café where we were about to eat. “He’s retired and has a family of his own. He was looking for easy work that would get him home by five every day. So Griffin asked him to watch me during business hours.”
“That’s sweet.”
“I tried to fight Griffin off in the beginning, but it wasn’t working. He said it was hard enough to leave me alone just as his wife, but now that I’m having his baby…he said he couldn’t stand the idea.” We both ordered then took a seat by the window.
“Understandable.”
“I wanted to keep fighting, but I knew it was an argument I would never win, so I just caved. That’s what marriage is all about—deciding the right time to cave.”
“He’s just trying to protect you. I can’t say that I blame him.”
“I can’t either,” she said with a sigh. “His heart is in the right place, so it’s fine.” She rubbed her stomach gently as it protruded through her sweater. “The baby has been kicking a lot lately. Griffin is fascinated by it.”
“Wow, that’s so great.” Seeing Vanessa married and pregnant gave me a hint of jealousy. I’d never been that way before, but seeing Luca the other day made me realize how much I wanted a family. Listening to how Griffin protected her made me realize I wanted that too.
Bosco fulfilled the second part, but he could never fulfill the first.
“Do you think it’s a boy or a girl?” I asked.
“Hmm…it’s hard to tell.” She removed her hand from her stomach and sipped her water. “But I think it’s a boy. He just kicks so much, even though it’s not too hard yet, like he needs to take up as much space as possible. He’s aggressive and bossy, making me throw up in the morning sometimes. So, it’s probably a boy.” She laughed. “Reminds me of Griffin.”
I chuckled. “You’re probably right.”
“So, what’s up with Mr. Panty Soaker?” she asked. “Are you still hooking up with him?” Unlike before, Vanessa ate her food quickly, her appetite forcing her to dig into her meal like she hadn’t eaten in days. She’d never had an appetite before, but now everything was different.
“Yeah…I’m still seeing him.” As far as Vanessa knew, this secret guy was just some random man who didn’t matter. In reality, I was in pretty deep with a dangerous man that I should stay away from. It was getting difficult to hide it—especially from her. I wasn’t sure what I was doing anymore, and that scared me.
“Really?” she asked. “So, it’s been a few weeks, then?”
“Yeah, about three.”
“That’s a pretty long time for just sleeping together…” She gave me a look full of accusation, her opinion written directly across her face. “Sounds like it’s a little more serious. Do you actually like this guy?”
“Yes. And no.”
“What do you like about him?”
I considered my answer for a long time before I gave it. “I like that he’s strong. He’s the protective type…like Griffin.” Bosco had sav
ed me twice now, once when he wasn’t even there. He had the entire city under his control, giving me the power to walk freely without fear of harassment. He gave me something no one else ever could, not even my father.
“That was never important to me either, but after what happened with Knuckles, Griffin became exactly what I was looking for. It’s nice to know you always have him to protect you, even if you never need it. I guess it’s something all women are looking for…not realizing it until they find it. Men won’t even look at me when Griffin is around. He’s like the biggest shark in the ocean, and all the other men are fish.”
That was the same description I would give to Bosco.
“What else?” she asked.
“He’s has a sweet side…”
“Like roses and chocolates?” she asked.
I almost laughed because that was something Bosco would never do. “He speaks highly of his mother, who passed away a few years ago from cancer. She was a single mother who raised him and his brother, and he always has this respect in his voice…like he was so proud of her. He took care of her for the last ten years of her life. Since I’m so close to my family, I liked hearing that he is close to his.”
“That is sweet,” she said. “I like him already.”
She shouldn’t draw a conclusion just yet. “A lot of men I meet are a bit turned off by my headstrong attitude. They’re either intimidated or annoyed by it.”
“I know how that is,” she said with a chuckle.
“But it doesn’t bother him at all. In fact, I think it’s the reason he likes me so much.”
She nodded. “Griffin told me only a truly powerful man can handle a powerful woman. Only a man so secure in who he is would be unaffected by her. So if he actually likes those qualities about you, that means he’s one hell of a man. At least in my experience…”
“So…those are all the things I like about him. Not to mention, the sex is incredible.” Now that it’d been almost a week since he’d been between my legs, I was starting to get grouchy. I wondered what he was doing at night and if he was thinking about me. Was he so busy he didn’t have time for me? Or was he with someone else? That didn’t seem likely because he would be transparent about it.
“It sounds like he’s the perfect man. So, what’s the problem? Why don’t you make it into something more?” Vanessa took a bite of her sandwich and quickly swallowed it down. “It sounds like your dad would like him, based on everything you just told me.”
This time, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing.
“What?” she asked, visibly confused. “Unless there’s something you aren’t telling me…”
I knew Vanessa would keep my secret if I asked her to. Regardless of her relationship with her husband, she would keep my secret safe. Her loyalty to him had nothing to do with her loyalty to me. “There’s a lot I haven’t told you. But I need you to understand that this has to stay between us. You can’t even tell Griffin.”
She wiped her mouth with a napkin then sighed. “Oh shit. This is bad, isn’t it?”
I nodded. “Really bad. Can you keep a secret?”
She rolled her eyes. “Girl, you know I can. That’s not what I’m worried about. Who is this guy you’re involved with?”
“You remember my incident in the alleyway?”
“Unfortunately,” she said coldly. “Instead of letting those guys get away, Bosco should have—” Like a lightbulb went off in her head, she darted her gaze to me, her eyes expanded to the size of baseballs. “Oh. My. God. It’s Bosco, isn’t it?”
I nodded, feeling the guilt rise in my stomach.
“Oh shit.” She threw her napkin down. “Griffin has nothing but bad things to say about that guy.”
“I’m aware.”
“Then what the hell are you doing?” she demanded. “Griffin made it sound like he’s a psycho dictator. He controls the entire city. The guy is untouchable. He’s basically the king of this entire area. Not only does he control the police, the government, and the cash, but he also controls all the murderers, thieves, and rapists. He’s like…the head honcho.”
“Yeah…” That described him pretty well.
“Then what are you doing, Carmen?”
I sighed and tucked my hair behind my ear. “I have no idea. It started off slow and then escalated into this… I’m not sure what to do.”
“How did this happen? He saved you, and then you took him home?”
“Not quite,” I said. “After he saved me, he said he wanted something in return.”
“Ahh…here we go.” She shook her head, as if this didn’t surprise her at all. “And he asked you to fuck him to show your gratitude. Been there…done that.”
“He asked for a kiss, actually. But it turned into a dry hump that made me come in the alleyway.” I wouldn’t share this embarrassing information with anyone else but her, knowing she wouldn’t judge me for it. “Then I went home, alone, and assumed I would never see him again. But then he showed up at my work, crashed a date I had, and it just kept getting worse. So we started hooking up, and that’s all it was supposed to be…meaningless sex. But then he said he wanted a chance to be something more…and here I am now. He has men tail me everywhere I go to keep me safe, he says I belong to him now, and before I knew what happened, I was basically in a monogamous relationship with this guy.” I was talking a million miles a minute, so I finally paused and caught my breath.
Vanessa stared at me, speechless. “Jesus.”
“Yeah…”
“Does he hurt you?”
“No,” I blurted. “Not at all. He’s protective…even kind. He’s just a little intense. Said he doesn’t want to share me with anyone, and he doesn’t want to be with anyone else either. So he pretty much decided that we’re exclusive.”
“And what does that mean?” she asked. “Are you serious, then? Is this actually something?”
“No. I told him I would never want any kind of future with him.”
“Good.”
“It’s just a monogamous fling…because he doesn’t want to wear a condom.”
“Girl, did you—”
“He gave me his papers. He’s clean.”
“Good…maybe he’s somewhat of a gentleman, after all.”
I scoffed, thinking that was a bit of a stretch. “He told me Griffin threatened him to stay away from me.”
“Why didn’t you tell Griffin when this started?”
“Because of everything you just said,” I snapped. “This guy has twenty-four men guarding him at any given time. He has another team at the building he owns too. This guy throws lawbreakers into a ring and makes them fight to the death. You think I’m getting Griffin involved in that? When you guys are having a baby? Hell no, I’m keeping this a secret from everyone—except you.”
Vanessa’s eyes softened. “I appreciate that, Carmen, but we’re family. You’re like a sister to me. Whatever happens to one of us, happens to all of us. We’re in this together. And if you need to get out of this relationship, we’ll make it happen.”
“That’s the thing…” I broke eye contact because I couldn’t look at her as I spoke. “I’m not sure if I want out of this relationship…” I would never find a man who could please me like Bosco. I would never find a man who could protect me the way he could. “And even if I did, I’m not sure if I have a choice. He’s made subtle threats here and there…that he’ll never let me go.”
“Shit,” she whispered. “From what I’ve learned, you have to stand your ground.”
I nodded. “He told me the same thing.”
“Do you see a future with this guy?” she asked, watching me closely.
I still didn’t like Bosco for what he did for a living. I was still afraid of him, afraid of the power that was constantly at his fingertips. Getting involved with a man like that sounded dangerous. His enemies would be my enemies. “I’ve always pictured a house in Tuscany with four kids. I would sell the shop and be a full-time mom. My husband…he do
esn’t really have a face, but he’s there. I don’t know anything about him, but he’s kind and strong. That’s the future I want, and I definitely can’t picture Bosco fitting into that image.”
“If he doesn’t fit in that vision, then he’s probably not the right guy. But based on my experience with Griffin, I didn’t think that future was possible with him either. But slowly, he started to be part of that picture. Now he’s the greatest husband I ever could have asked for…because he grew into the man I wanted him to be.”
“I don’t think Bosco would change for anyone…”
“Then maybe you should get out of this relationship…if you still can.”
The idea of finding Mr. Right didn’t sound appealing since he didn’t seem to exist. I didn’t want to go back to mediocre sex either, not when Bosco gave me mind-blowing sex every single time. He was so selfless in bed, aroused by my pleasure more than his own. And I loved feeling safe, knowing that nothing would ever happen to me as long as I was the woman in his bed. But if I got any deeper into this relationship, then I might never be able to crawl out. He might become more obsessed with me.
And he might not let me go. “Yeah, you’re right…”
Another two days passed, and he didn’t call me.
It’d been a week now.
None of this was making sense. Maybe he didn’t want me anymore. Maybe he didn’t care anymore. That would make my escape much easier, but it also pained me at the same time.
That he was bored of me so quickly.
I was lying in bed alone, the wool socks on my feet to keep me warm. It was late, but I couldn’t sleep, the area between my legs throbbing because Bosco hadn’t been there in so long. If he wasn’t sleeping with anyone else, then he must be going crazy too.
The thought of him sleeping with someone else pissed me off, not because I was jealous, but because he wasn’t man enough to tell me about it. Was he just going to ignore me forever and assume I would disappear? Did that mean his men weren’t guarding me anymore? Our last conversation made it sound like we were still together, but his silence said otherwise.