Luck of the Witch (Crypt Witch Cozy Mystery Series Book 1)

by K. E. O'Connor

  “That’s great news.”

  “It is.”

  “So why do you have a face like a smacked butt?”

  “I do not. It’s just that—”

  “Now you think you have to go. That you’re more trouble than you’re worth.” Wiggles nudged the file I held with his nose.

  “It is safer if I’m not around.”

  “It’s boring. I get bored when you’re not here. You should stay and keep me entertained.”

  “This isn’t about you.”

  “It should be. I’m your hellhound.”

  I shook my head. I sometimes wondered who owned who in this relationship. Who was I kidding? I always put Wiggles first. Now he was a walking, talking hellhound he was going to keep me on my toes even more.

  “Come on, let’s go celebrate the prisoner getting out on early release.” I headed along the lane to Mom’s house. I’d only just started walking up the garden path when I heard laughter inside. I slowed, and instead of going to the front door, I walked around the side and peered in the kitchen window.

  Everyone was inside. Aurora was surrounded by Mom, Auntie Queenie, and Granny Dottie. Grandpa Lucius sat off to one side, smiling to himself as he rocked backwards and forwards in his ancient wooden rocking chair. Only Uncle Kenny was absent, most likely left to stand guard in his man cave in the cemetery.

  I wanted to be a part of that, but I held back. I could feel Frank stirring, and I wasn’t even in the same room as Aurora.

  “You keep your demon snout out of my family’s business,” I whispered to him. “Aurora is not yours.”

  Frank didn’t reply, but I felt a trickle of his hot energy run up my spine. One day, he’d beat me. One day, I’d lose control around Aurora. I could never let that happen. I had to keep my distance.

  “Are we going in?” Wiggles asked. “I bet there’s a cake.”

  “No.” I turned and walked away. Everything was fine here. Aurora was safe, and everyone else was happy. I’d do a quick check-in with Cloven Hoof and make sure Merrie had everything covered for the next few days then I’d pack a bag and get out of Willow Tree Falls while I could.

  “Where do you think you’re going?” Auntie Queenie stood on the front porch, her arms folded under her ample bosom.

  I looked back at the house. “How did you get out of the kitchen and onto the porch so quickly?”

  “I’m a witch.” She grinned at me and beckoned me over. “You can’t go sneaking off without seeing us. Anyone would think you don’t love us.”

  I walked over and sat on the front porch steps. “That’s just it. That’s why I have to do it.”

  Auntie Queenie sat next to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “I know that. We all do.”

  I leaned against her and breathed in the scent of elderflowers and cinnamon. “It’s not easy keeping Frank under control.”

  “You put on an excellent show of having no problems with him. You let everyone believe you’re capable.” Auntie Queenie raised a finger and pressed it to my lips. “But I know the truth. I see how you struggle with him. I know how strong he is. Whenever you’re around me, I get the chills.”

  I gently pushed her finger away, so I could speak. “You’ve never said anything before.”

  “I didn’t want to alarm you and give you another reason to avoid us. I know you like to pretend nothing ruffles your feathers, but that demon you hold is a nasty one.” She stroked my hair behind my shoulders. “When you found him in your sister’s bedroom all those years ago, he was going to kill her. He would have if you hadn’t trapped him. You are an incredibly strong witch. You have powers we’ve never seen before in this family.”

  “I don’t know about that. You and Mom are amazing at kicking demon butt if one of them dares to creep out of the prison.”

  “That’s because we have decades of experience on you. And that’s our speciality. We’ve honed our skills in demon butt kicking. You have to handle much more than that. You use your body as a demon prison, containing a powerful and dark force. You leave the protective environment of Willow Tree Falls and surround yourself with non-magicals when you go demon hunting. You’re never sure what you’re going to find out there, but you always come back having trapped the demon. I doubt either your mom or I could achieve that.”

  “You make me sound like a super-witch.”

  “You are a super special witch, especially to me.” Auntie Queenie kissed my forehead. “Don’t be afraid to say when you’re having problems. We’re all here for you. And Aurora understands.”

  “She doesn’t. She never understands that she needs to stay away from me.”

  “Aurora does just that. She barely visits you and hardly ever sees you when it’s just the two of you. She would like nothing more than to hang out with her big sister every night. Aurora tries as hard as you do to make sure Frank doesn’t get the upper hand.”

  My bottom lip jutted out. Maybe Auntie Queenie was right. I always acted so annoyed whenever Aurora came too close, but she didn’t do it often. She passed on lots of messages between family members that reached me, and she used the snow globe system a lot. It would have been so easy for her to walk down the road to Cloven Hoof. Instead, she was keeping a distance. Aurora was doing her best, knowing how difficult the situation was.

  “You’ve done an amazing job helping to keep her safe,” Auntie Queenie said. “I’m sure Angel Force would have charged her with Deacon’s murder if it weren’t for your involvement. You’re turning into a regular little sleuth alongside your demon hunting.”

  I shrugged. “You see? I am a super-witch.”

  “You’re also my super niece, and I want to keep you that way. You let me know if you have any problems. You can always talk to me, whatever the trouble is.”

  “Thanks, Auntie Queenie. I do struggle sometimes to control Frank. I lost control of him yesterday. There was magic interfering with my abilities, and he beat me.”

  Auntie Queenie nodded. “I know. I was at Tilly’s this morning. She mentioned you were upstairs. I decided to let you rest.”

  “If Tilly hadn’t helped me, I’m not sure I could have stopped Frank.” Sadness filtered through me. Hosting a demon was the hardest thing I’d ever done. It kept me apart from the people I loved the most.

  “Let me give you a piece of advice that has always worked when it comes to diffusing tension and getting control of the situation.”

  “Anything. I’ll try anything if it means Frank doesn’t keep slipping out and taking control.”

  She patted my hand. “You need to have more sex.”

  I choked out a laugh. “I do?”

  “It works for me. Whenever I’m experiencing tension or am frustrated about something, I go see your Uncle Kenny. He’s a man of few words, but he’s also a man of action. I only have to say to him, Kenny, I’m frustrated. He jumps straight to it. That man has so many moves it makes my head spin. I remember one occasion when—”

  “Err, if it’s okay, I really don’t want to know about your love life.”

  Auntie Queenie chuckled. “Maybe you don’t need to know the details, but you need to know the basics. A lot of sex with the right partner is good for you. You need to get yourself a regular man and make good use of him. Don’t be shy in coming forward when you tell him what you need. It’s important you keep control of Frank. If that means you have to get busy with your significant other on a frequent basis, then you do that. I’ve got books I can loan you if you need inspiration. They show all kinds of different positions.”

  I eased myself out from under her arm. “I appreciate the offer. But before I read the books, I need to find myself a significant other.”

  She patted my knee. “Of course, you do. I’m happy to share, but I want those books back. I make use of them most evenings.”

  I blew out a breath to try to cool my hot cheeks. Auntie Queenie needed to check her inappropriate discussion filter was working. “What’s making you so tense that you have to get busy s
o often?”

  “I kick demon butts for a living. We look after a demon prison. Not every day is a picnic.”

  I nodded. Living in Willow Tree Falls, it was easy to forget that protecting a demon prison wasn’t an everyday thing, especially when your family did it for a living and you’d been raised talking about crypt cracks, demon powers, and how to fell a demon with a single punch.

  “Aurora tells me you’re still looking for Deacon’s killer,” Auntie Queenie said.

  “I should let Angel Force do it, but I’m not sure they’ve got any angles. Aurora told me it’s the right thing to do, find the killer.”

  Auntie Queenie smiled. “How’s that going?”

  “I have my suspicions about Axel. I’ve ruled out Petra, and I don’t think Mannie was involved or Rhett.”

  Auntie Queenie snorted. “Axel wouldn’t get his hands dirty with a murder. He’s too much of a pretty boy.”

  “He’s a half-demon pretty boy.”

  “Even so, he’s a weak half-demon. I still have my suspicions about the biker gang.”

  “Nope, I’ve spoken to Rhett. They were out running a new bike on the night of the murder.”

  “Do you believe the biker gang?”

  “I believe Rhett. He wouldn’t lie to me.”

  “Have you spoken to the rest of the gang?”

  “Well, no. I took Rhett at his word.”

  Auntie Queenie tutted. “You get your head turned too easily by him. I’m not saying he isn’t gorgeous, but you should double check the information. Just because you went on a few dates with him that doesn’t mean he’s always going to be honest with you. The biker gang is his family. They’ll protect each other. It would be easy enough for them to come up with an alibi like that. What’s to say they weren’t running that bike just as Rhett said? He didn’t need to be there. And remember, I did see his bike at Deacon’s house.”

  “Are you sure it was his bike?”

  “I know my bikes. If it’s Rhett’s bike, I’d know it if I saw it again.”

  My head sank into my hands. If that was the case, then Rhett had lied to me. “He told me he hadn’t been in contact with Deacon for a long time. Why lie? What is he hiding that means he needs to conceal a visit to an old friend?”

  “We should go.” Auntie Queenie hopped up.

  I peered up at her. “Go where?”

  “To see the biker gang.”

  “Now?”

  “There’s no point in hanging around. There’s a killer to be found.”

  “I can talk to Rhett again. There’s no need to see the whole gang.” I wasn’t scared of the bikers, but I didn’t want to drag Auntie Queenie into this search for a killer.

  “There’s every need. Come on. There’s no time to waste. We’ve got a biker gang to intimidate.” Auntie Queenie strode along the path and out the gate.

  I jumped up and hurried after her.

  “Are you sure this is a good idea?” Wiggles asked as he followed along behind.

  “No, it’s a lousy idea. But you know what Auntie Queenie is like when she sets her mind to something. Nothing stops her.”

  “She turns into you on a triple dose of lemon drops.”

  “That’s not fair.”

  Wiggles barked out a laugh. “Trust me. I’ve been around this family long enough. You are just like her.”

  I shook my head and broke into a jog to keep up with Auntie Queenie. Maybe we were similar, but I wondered what I’d gotten myself into by going with her to interrogate Rhett’s gang.

  Chapter 21

  “Are you sure you don’t want to slow down?” I was having trouble keeping up with Auntie Queenie’s fast pace as she strode away from the house and toward the woods.

  “I’m fine. It’s all the sex, you see. It’s a great aerobic workout,” Auntie Queenie said.

  “Maybe I should try it more often if it keeps you this fit.” My forehead was damp with sweat, and my chest heaved. I was half Auntie Queenie’s age, but she wasn’t even out of breath.

  “I highly recommend it.” Auntie Queenie slowed as we turned down an overgrown path.

  “Do you know where you’re going?”

  “This is the place. Most people don’t come here on foot. The gang uses an ancient cave system on the edge of the woods. Very few people know about it.”

  I tripped over a tree root and bashed my knee. “I can see why.”

  We walked for about five minutes, the trees getting denser and all signs of a path vanishing.

  “Hold it right there, ladies.” What looked like an enormous moss-covered brick moved in front of us.

  Wiggles jumped and ran behind me. So much for being a badass hellhound.

  As my eyes adjusted to the gloom, I saw it was a huge, tattooed, bearded guy, his eyes narrowed and his hand holding a large wooden stick.

  “Hello, dear. You must be a part of the biker gang,” Auntie Queenie said as she peered up at the giant of a man.

  His expression remained neutral. “You’re on private land.”

  “We’re looking for Rhett.” I stood next to Auntie Queenie, sensing the pulse of menace coming off the guy. “Is he here?”

  “I don’t know anyone by that name.”

  “Of course you do, dear,” Auntie Queenie said. “He’s gorgeous and wears tight leather pants and has a lovely bum to fill them. A bit like a ripe peach, all ready for biting.”

  The bearded guy snorted a laugh, and his gaze flicked to the side. “You could be describing me.”

  Auntie Queenie chuckled. “You’re more meat than muscle.”

  The guy scowled at her. “He’s not here. Leave.”

  “Maybe you can help us if Rhett’s not available,” I said. “He told me he was out on Deadman’s Lane the night of Deacon’s murder.”

  “What of it?”

  “Is it true?”

  “Why do you care?”

  “Because someone murdered Deacon, and I want to find out who.”

  “It wasn’t Rhett. It wasn’t any of us.”

  “Rhett was there on the night of the murder?”

  “If he says he was, then he was.”

  I shook my head. “That wasn’t a real answer.”

  “Why don’t you take us to your leader?” Auntie Queenie said. “We can sit down, have a nice cup of tea, and you can tell us everything.”

  “We don’t have a leader, and we don’t serve tea.” He stepped forward and went to grab hold of Auntie Queenie’s arm.

  She sidestepped him and planted her knee in his stomach. “My apologies, but it’s not polite to grab a lady.”

  The bearded guy grunted as he clutched his stomach. “Leave. I won’t ask you again.”

  “You weren’t asking. You were trying to manhandle me. Only my Kenny gets to do that.”

  The guy pulled himself upright and rubbed his stomach. “I’ll do more than manhandle you.” He lunged at her.

  Auntie Queenie grabbed a low-hanging branch over her head and swung her feet forward, connecting with the giant biker’s chest. I sensed the magic she pushed into her feet as she kicked him.

  The biker was launched through the air and slammed into a tree. He didn’t get up.

  “I did warn him.” Auntie Queenie jumped down from the tree branch.

  “Some guys can’t take a hint,” Wiggles said.

  “Where were you when the fighting went down?” I asked him.

  Wiggles inspected a spot on the ground. “I have an upset stomach. I needed an emergency comfort break.”

  I sighed. “It looks like we’re going to have to find Rhett ourselves.”

  The surrounding air shimmered. Three more bikers stepped into view, blades in their hands.

  “We’ve got unwelcome visitors.” A tall lean guy with a scar above his right eye stepped forward, a blade glinting in his hand. “And they’ve not been too friendly to Josh.”

  “Young men, behave yourselves and put down those knives,” Auntie Queenie said. “I raced against your parents, so
I know you, Jimmy Blackmouth, and you, Ian Blaine. You should respect your elders.”

  A guy with bulging biceps and a mess of brown curls squinted at Auntie Queenie before laughing. “You’re telling us you used to be in a gang?”

  “Not this gang. I ran with the Dead Tree Witches.”

  Ian hissed. “You were our rivals.”

  “Until we ran them out of town,” Jimmy said.

  “Where are your manners?” Auntie Queenie said. “You’re not too old for me to bend over my knee.”

  “He’s into kinky stuff,” Ian said. “He might like having an older woman discipline him.”

  The bikers chuckled and bumped fists.

  “You can watch your tongue, as well.”

  I touched her elbow. “We’re not here to cause trouble.”

  “It’s too late for that,” Ian said. “Josh is out cold. What did you do to him?”

  “Schooled him about his appalling manners,” Auntie Queenie said. “You will be next if you don’t watch yourself.”

  “Promises, promises.”

  “We’re just here to see Rhett,” I said as I moved to stand in front of Auntie Queenie before she challenged the entire gang to an all-out fist fight. “We need to check his alibi for the night of Deacon’s murder.”

  “You’re accusing one of our own of being involved in that?” Ian sneered.

  “No, but he needs to be scrubbed off the list of suspects, so we can find the killer.”

  “What list?”

  “My list of suspects. I’m not having my sister’s name tarnished with this murder.”

  “He was with us,” Ian said.

  “Where was that?”

  Ian glanced at his friends. “Wherever he was supposed to be. Wherever he told you he was. We’ve got his back covered.”

  “You’re lying to protect him,” I said. “If he had anything to do with this, I need to know.”

  “Then what are you going to do?” Rhett stepped out from behind a tree, his dark eyes blazing with anger. “Are you planning on arresting me and taking me to Angel Force?”

  I sucked in a breath. He was even more gorgeous when angry. “You lied to me. You told me you haven’t spoken to Deacon in ages.”

  “I haven’t.” Rhett signaled his guys to move back, and they all obeyed.