A Date With Angel and Other Things ...

by J. Judkins

  “I get it, Kim! You didn’t see a movie!”

  “No, you don’t understand--”

  “I don’t care. I’m going to get some coffee.”

  Kim watched him go, then sat back down.

  He didn’t know.

  She was safe. Andy hadn’t suspected anything. The stress must be getting to her. She’d jumped to conclusions and panicked, and there hadn’t been a reason for it.

  Kim took a deep breath, willing herself to relax. She hadn’t given herself away. No one suspected anything.

  Very slowly, she opened her eyes. Her pulse rate had slowed. Her breathing was steady.

  Calm. Be calm. No one suspects. Everything is calm. No one knows. No one--

  Lucy walked past her desk. “Hello, Kim.”

  “I didn’t!”

  Lucy stopped at once. “Hmm? Didn’t what?”

  “Ahh...I didn’t see a movie. Andy asked me if I saw a movie. And I didn’t. See one. A movie, I mean.”

  Lucy made an elaborate show of looking into Andy’s empty cubicle next to Kim’s, then took a slow exaggerated look around the office. “Andy’s over at the coffee machine,” she pointed out.

  “He was here. But he’s getting coffee, now.”

  “Got it, Kim.” She smiled and nodded.

  “You saw him, didn’t you, Larry?” asked Kim.

  Larry looked up at the mention of his name. He peered back at Kim from across the narrow hall separating his section of cubicles from hers. “Hmm? What?”

  “You saw him, right?”

  “Saw who?”

  Lucy abruptly lost all interest in Kim. She smiled a pleasant smile that fooled no one and sauntered up to Larry, ignoring how his irritated glare intensified at her approach. “Big weekend last weekend for you and Katie?” she asked.

  “Hello, to you, too,” Larry said, making a show at being busy at his computer, “and not that it’s any of your business, but yes.”

  “Did you take her anywhere?”

  “Are you going to ask me this every goddamn year?”

  Lucy pouted. “Anniversaries are important to some people.”

  “They’re also personal.”

  “Anniversary, huh? What did you get her?” asked Andy, returning with his coffee. “Flowers?”

  Lucy rolled her eyes. “Flowers? Please!”

  Kim darkened. She’d caught Lucy’s subtle remark aimed directly at her. Did they think talking in code would fool her?

  “What is it? Ten years, now? Twelve?” asked Lucy.

  “It’s our twelfth,” rasped Larry, “and what’s wrong with buying Katie flowers?”

  “There’s nothing wrong with them.” Lucy looked to the ceiling as if appealing to the heavens. “They’re just, oh, I don’t know, not very traditional. Depending on the year, you should--”

  “I’m not buying something specific just because some stupid jewelry store owner put it on some stupid list.”

  “What’s the ten year gift?” asked Andy.

  Larry turned his glare on Andy. “I said twelfth, you idiot.”

  “I know that, but I’m wondering. What’s the tenth?”

  “What’s first year?” asked Kim, surprising them all.

  As one, they turned to stare at her in varying looks of surprise. Kim wilted back. “I was just asking,” she said, holding up her hands. “Honestly, I don’t care. Forget about it.”

  “Is something wrong?” Lucy asked her.

  “I’m just in a bad mood, that’s all. It’s a Monday.”

  “She’s been like that since I got here,” said Andy. He made a miniscule gesture with his coffee in Kim’s direction, careful not to spill it. “I figured it's just Kim being Kim. Who knows what’s wrong?”

  Lucy wasn’t to be deterred. She focused her full attention on Kim, eyes focused in a look of concern carefully designed to mask her invasive curiosity. “Kim? Did something happen last weekend between you and Angel?”

  Kim intensified her scowl, concentrating on her depression. Think bad thoughts. Lots of work to do. Eight more hours to go. Angel lying in wait to ambush her and probably have sex with her the instant she got home…

  Okay, the last one didn’t help.

  Her expression twisted before settling into a frown. Bad thoughts. Think bad thoughts! “I’m allowed to have bad moods on Mondays. All this work piled up when I took the day off, and life sucks in general.”

  “What’s the ten year gift?” Andy asked again.

  Lucy whirled on Andy. “Will you shut up about that? Something happened to Kim, you insensitive jerk!”

  “Nothing’s wrong with me. I’m just depressed,” said Kim, feeling a blush threatening to rise. Don’t think about Angel. Stop thinking about her!

  “See? Nothing wrong with her,” said Andy. “Anyway, for the list, do you have them all memorized or something? I can look it up, if you want.”

  Lucy glared at Andy, then looked to Kim and back to Andy again. She folded her arms. “Tenth year is diamond jewelry. First year is a clock.”

  Kim burst into laughter. “Really? A clock? A calendar would be better! Angel--”

  All eyes returned to Kim. She retreated once again.

  “See? Not depressed. She got over it,” said Andy.

  Kim shook her head frantically. “No, you’re wrong. I’m still depressed. Monday’s are terrible, and I’ve got all this work to do, and I just hate it.”

  Lucy’s eyes flowed with concern.

  Kim’s eyes flowed with panic.

  “Kim...”

  “What? What do you…what?”

  “Please, tell me what’s wrong? Is it Angel? Did the two of you have another fight?”

  Kim’s brow furrowed. Another? “We never had a first fight. And this hasn’t got anything to do with Angel.”

  “Why else are you depressed?”

  “I’m not depressed,” Kim insisted.

  Larry went back to his work, apparently considering the matter settled.

  Andy stared at her, his expression a mix of satisfaction with ever increasing confusion as he thought about what happened. “Hold on. What?”

  Lucy looked even more sorrowful.

  Kim picked up several sheets of paper and made a show of stacking them. “I may seem cheerful on the surface, but I’m not! Work has got me down. What about the rest of you? Don’t the rest of you have jobs? Leave me alone. It’s Monday, and...I’m depressed. But I’m not that depressed.”

  Realization of what she said caught up with her. The papers fell from her fingers and spilled to the floor. “Oh, God. I messed up, didn’t I?”

  Kim hid her face with her hands. What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she keep her stories straight?

  Lucy stepped into Kim’s cubicle and hugged her. Kim went straight into shock.

  For a moment, she stood paralyzed, then she melted into the embrace and returned it. “I never meant to say any of that!” she moaned. She wanted to weep with frustration. “It isn't fair!”

  Lucy patted her back. “It’s all right, Kim.”

  “You don’t understand. I didn’t--”

  “There, there. Let it all out.”

  “I’m not crying. I’m not!” Kim cried, clinging to Lucy. “I’m just frustrated, that’s all. I hate this!”

  “You’re trying to hide it, but you don’t have to.”

  “No. I can’t tell you. You’ll just make fun of me.”

  “Most of us already know.”

  No. That couldn't be true. Could it?

  Kim shook her head and tried to push Lucy away, but the older woman wouldn’t release her. “No way. You don’t know anything.”

  “You don’t have to hide your feelings.”

  “I’m not hiding anything,” Kim insisted once again, but she sagged against Lucy. All hope had left her. She’d failed.

  “Is this your first time?” Lucy whispered against her ear.

  Why did I think I could hide it from anyone? “Maybe. Yes. It was. Oh, God.”
<
br />   “You don’t have to hide it away. Being in love is a wonderful thing!”

  Kim stiffened. What?

  “It’s obvious how much you care for Angel. If you show her that--“

  “Wait,” Kim tried again to push Lucy away, successfully this time. “You think I’m in love with her?”

  “You don’t have to deny it.”

  “Well, I’m not!” Kim retorted, indignant. “I’m not denying it! Wait...”

  “Have you told Angel how you feel?”

  “I’m not in love with her. Just because she’s staying at my house and sleeping...in the same house where I happen to be, doesn’t mean anything.”

  Andy sipped his coffee. “Denial. Classic case. Seen it a million times before. She’s in love.”

  “Good for you, Kim,” said Larry. He sat back in his chair, a distant faraway look in his eye. “When Katie and I met, it was love at first sight. The two of us--“

  “I’m not in love with her!” cried Kim.

  Lucy ignored her outburst. “Everything will be all right, Kim. If you take things slow--“

  “Ha! Tried that!” Kim wiped at her tears again. “Take things slow? Doesn’t work!”

  “Go on a few dates--“

  “Tried that!”

  “I thought she was in denial?” asked Andy to no one in particular.

  “Yes!” Kim waved her hand at Andy. “I’m denying everything. That proves I’m not anything.”

  “If she’s not denying it, that means she’s admitting it, you idiot,” Larry said to Andy.

  “No, I’m not admitting anything.”

  Lucy sighed. “Kim--“

  “My problem isn’t me and how much I’m in love with Angel. My problem is you and everyone else talking about it.”

  An office door slammed open and their boss Jack Morrison stormed into the open hallway. “Does anybody in this office work anymore?” he demanded.

  Lucy held up her hands and backed away. “You’ve got a lot to think about,” she said to Kim in a confidential whisper. “If you need a friend, you know where to find me.”

  “You really think I’m in love?” Kim demanded, incredulous. “Is that what you think?”

  “You don’t have to hide it,” Lucy said again.

  Kim hesitated. Would it be better to ‘admit’ to being in love to hide her telltale glow? Or vehemently deny it?

  If she “admitted” Lucy was right, by the end of the day everyone would think she was in love with Angel. But if she denied it, everyone would assume she was literally in denial. They’d be right, but for all the wrong reasons!

  Either way, they were going to assume she was in love. Kim couldn’t see a way to avoid that fate.

  But wasn’t a false admission infinitely preferable to the entire office talking about how she’d spent the entire weekend having hot, lesbian sex with Angel? That had to be avoided at all costs. Surely she’d dodged a bullet when Lucy jumped to the wrong conclusion?

  Kim decided to go with it. By admitting it, if sometime during the day she lapsed into blissful happiness without realizing it, it would be explained away. No one would question it further.

  More importantly, Angel would never find out.

  “Okay, maybe I am a little bit in love with her,” said Kim, avoiding Lucy’s eyes.

  Lucy grinned and hugged her again. Kim tolerated it with a faint smile before pushing her away. Larry gave her an encouraging thumbs-up from across the hall and returned to work.

  Andy simply shrugged. “Guess I owe Joe twenty bucks. Congratulations, Kim.”

  “Oh, please, not this again. We’re not getting married.”

  “What? Married?” Andy’s face split into a grin.

  All background chatter stopped, then continued on in hushed whispers.

  Kim’s heart stopped. Oh, crap.

  Jack filled in the sudden void. “Lucy, stop gossiping with Kim about her new girlfriend and get back to work. I’m not paying you to play matchmaker. The rest of you, you do have jobs, don’t you? Would you like to keep them? Get back to work!”

  There was a smattering of, “Yes, sirs.”

  “Good.” Jack nodded, then turned an eye to Kim. “Congratulations, by the way.”

  “We’re not getting married!”

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  When Kim returned from work that night, there was no alien girlfriend lying in wait for her. She didn’t know how to feel about that.

  During the drive home, she’d envisioned multiple scenarios of what might happen. It didn't escape her notice that in none of her scenarios had she even entertained the possibility of Angel not ambushing her and trying something the moment she walked through the door.

  But Angel wasn’t there. The thought of not being able to use any of her planned, resistance techniques annoyed her on multiple levels. She felt she should have been relieved, and was irritated that she was not. She was also annoyed that all of her resistance scenarios measured success based on how long she could hold out before finally giving in.

  Determined not to care, Kim threw herself into her favorite living room chair and settled down to read. With luck, she could enjoy her latest book all she wanted and put off dinner the way she used to until finally becoming too hungry to ignore it.

  But it was all for naught. She couldn’t focus.

  Angel had to be planning something. Nothing else could explain it. Angel must have known Kim would anticipate her waiting in ambush at the door, and had made new plans that Kim couldn’t foresee.

  With this in mind, Kim started going room to room. She searched with the apprehensive look of someone expecting to be set upon at any moment and doubtful they'd survive the encounter. At no point did she call out for Angel. Calling out would have made her seem needy, and Kim didn’t do needy.

  Her search complete, she returned to the living room and picked up her book once again.

  But it was no use. Relaxation continued to elude her. Instead, she felt a growing frustration, irritated at Angel’s continued absence.

  Apparently, Angel thought being a girlfriend meant sex all night long with the freedom to disappear without a word whenever she wanted. The last part was annoying. So was the first part about sex all night long, now that she thought about it. Both parts were annoying.

  Kim was barely a half an hour into her sulk when she heard the key twisting in the lock. Angel appeared at the door carrying bags from a nameless department store. She set them down. “I’m sorry, I was selfishly shopping for myself and lost track of time.”

  Kim raised an eyebrow. “That’s all right, Angel.”

  But Angel wasn’t listening. She disappeared into the kitchen. There was the sound of running water, and she returned carrying a partially filled glass vase. She set the vase on the end table next to Kim. “Are you angry with me?” she asked, eyes wide with apparent concern.

  “I did wonder where you were, but I’m not angry.”

  “But I didn’t bother leaving you a message,” said Angel. “I wasn’t thinking about you at all. I was being deliberately inconsiderate and thoughtless and just left.”

  Again, Kim wondered at Angel’s choice of words. “Deliberately?”

  Angel nodded vigorously. “Yes. Deliberately. I’m afraid I must have hurt you. I’m so sorry, Kim.” She clasped her hands before her. “Please, forgive me?”

  Kim pursed her lips, dubious. “Okay...” she said slowly.

  Angel smiled, then turned and went back out the front door into the hallway. Kim stared after her.

  Moments later, Angel returned with a fresh bouquet of flowers. “These are for you. I’m really sorry,” she said, and stuffed them into the vase.

  Kim was too bewildered to reply.

  “So...make-up sex?’ Angel asked, looking hopeful.

  With that, it all clicked, each turning of the gears sending shivers of pain into Kim’s brain. She closed her eyes, feeling a headache coming on.

  “What’s wrong? The flowers didn’t help?” A
ngel looked to the flowers, back to Kim, and back to the flowers, again. “I think you’re still angry. Are they the wrong type?”

  Kim didn’t answer. She left the room, rubbing her head. She needed an aspirin.

  “I’ll give you some time to cool off!” Angel called out after her.

  Kim went to the bedroom instead. Angel followed roughly twenty seconds later, which apparently Angel had decided was more than enough time to cool off. She sat down next to Kim.

  “So, the flowers didn’t work?”

  “That’s not why I’m upset.”

  “Not subtle enough?”

  Kim turned to face her. “You don’t have to pick a fight with me to manipulate me into having make-up sex.”

  “But, make-up sex is supposed to be really good. We should try it.”

  “I can’t imagine it’s any better than normal.”

  “We should try it, anyway, just to be sure.”

  “If you want sex so badly, why not ask me?”

  Angel’s voice became thoughtful and serious. “Kim. Would you like to have sex with me?”

  Kim reached out and took Angel’s hand. She smiled at her. “No.”

  “You’re teasing me.” With her free hand, Angel snatched up a pillow and hit her with it. Then hit her again.

  Kim seized her own pillow to use as an improvised shield, and tried her best innocent look. “Me? Tease you?”

  “We’d barely be kissing if we left it up to you!” Angel cried, and swung again. Kim blocked and retaliated, but Angel twisted away and dodged with ease.

  Angel’s retaliatory strike came out of nowhere. It caught Kim full force in the head, and she reeled back, dazed, the fight momentarily forgotten. Stars danced in her vision.

  The battle stopped at once.

  Kim was forced to take a moment to recover. She leaned away, one hand half raised to ward off any further potential attacks. The world seemed distant to her, but she could still sense Angel looking on, doing nothing, her pillow off to one side in a clear reassuring sign to convey to Kim that she had nothing to fear, that no attacks were forthcoming. Kim appreciated the gesture, genuinely thankful Angel hadn’t pressed her advantage.

  The look she gave Angel was one filled with gratitude. “I’m all right,” she said, a quaver in her voice betraying her momentary weakness. She could feel her strength returning with each passing moment. Her disorientation faded to nothing.