Denial (Goblin's Kiss Series Book One)

by Cyndi Goodgame

  “I—

  “He is a coward. He will hide in the mountain until I do something about it.”

  I jerked my head back letting my words resonate to make a point, “What will you do?”

  “Nothing, for now. We will create an enforcement group to survey and decide the best move. And we will want to see what he plans before we do anything else. Patience will be on our side.”

  “I once heard that patience is a vulture in wait to take out its prey when all seems safe.”

  “No, you heard wrong.”

  “No, I say right. If I wanted patience, I’d call myself Mary Poppins and sing away the urgency. But seeing as how I have no umbrella, I can’t do that now, can I?”

  Ames smirked at me with a slight lift of his lip forming a smile.

  It dawned on me what he might be saying by the we will decide on best moves part. “So you will help this group or start them?”

  A heavy sigh made his chest rise against me. “I will lead them.”

  “Why is it so hard for you to accept it?”

  “Nothing.” He ran his hands through his hair like he always did when he evaded to truth. He may think I didn’t notice his glance at Wicker, but I did.

  “Nothing me. That’s not an answer. I want to know,” I pressed him hoping a little humor might loosen him up. I gave Wicker the same copious look Ames just did.

  “I will show you.”

  Evasive, but we would see. He snatched my arm backward and half turned to look around us and then returned to me. His mouth opened and closed, his face contradicting his last words.

  “But first,” his eyes had something hungry in them and spelling out something dangerously close to what I have wanted for weeks now. “I have to...”

  He leaned in and stopped just close enough our eyes were still glued open bright green to sapphire blue. Both our breathing picked up.

  “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” a voice behind us called. “You know her fate.”

  "We will find a way,” he barked at Paul Wicker.

  He realized I wasn’t backing down. “Then at least ask her first.” Paul looked at me. “He told you what this kiss means?”

  I blushed twenty shades of tomorrow, but shook my head. He was standing with us when Joshlin announced it.

  “Is this what you want, Emma? Me?”

  He saw my bottom lip open to speak and glued his eyes on it waiting. It was reckless and unknowing, dangerous and possibly ill-fated. But sometimes life is just that.

  “Ames, I haven’t wanted anything else more in my life.”

  I took him for my own right then and there not waiting for him to kiss me first.

  I can’t say any explanation could cover the magic of one kiss, but this one tops any other kiss in history. As unbelievable as it sounds, sparks flew inside and out. Like fireworks let loose in the stand, electricity moved around us making our energies come alive into one entity. His lips were exactly how I imagined, soft and as nervous as mine. I wanted to never stop, never breath again. And I felt the way he was just as taken aback as I was by the odd occurrence and only deepened it further. This kiss was all about feeling how we were melding together into one. His hand pressed into the curve of my back. The hunger I saw in his eyes, felt, for so long was all I could feel in this kiss. He was gentle, but it was filled with need. We disconnected enough to confirm to each other that what we both felt and saw was of the same energy. Like a swirl of light bouncing around in my mind’s eye telling me this man was mine. No one would believe me, but I saw that light move between our bodies.

  Hoarse and raspy he asked, “Something just happened. Did you...feel it too?”

  I was thinking NS Sherlock, but I felt that might damper the mood. “Is it some kind of alpha goblin ritual bonding kind of thing, cuz’ I would have liked a warning?” I waved my hands around to exaggerate my point.

  “Emma, I think it means a little more than that,” he blushed. He actually turned pink, but I wouldn’t tell him that.

  “It means exactly what you think it does, my king.” A man I didn’t know dressed in the guard’s uniform entered and bowed to us.

  I still held on to Ames refusing to let go but accepted that he trusted this man since he didn’t give off bad vibes in any way. “Anyone going to enlighten me?”

  Ames wouldn’t look my way to answer. The hush of silence was thick around us until a throat cleared and shattered the private bubble I’d kept us in even if bodies were stirring around us.

  “It means, my dear princess, that you are the new queen of this realm whether you choose to be, cursed or not. It is not by way of extinguishing our last king, but rather by receiving the kiss of the true king. It is why, I think, he is able to lighten your load when you’re about to pop. Research told me that if a true king and true queen come together, the match would be like no other. Careful looking told me that it was your generation for it to happen. I also believe curses can be lifted or wrongly claimed.”

  This man looked over at Katelyn who appeared to be hiding her face from all of us. She seemed to be the instigator of telling some of my own secrets.

  Ames cleared his throat and said to her, “I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done for her. Telling him was a good move on your part and very brave. I can only wonder what all you suffered to gain the knowledge we have now.”

  “Just be glad it didn’t fall into the wrong hands. When I found her in the book room alone, I wanted to kill you myself, Cahn.” The guard regarded Katelyn like she was important to him.

  “Why didn’t you say something last night?” Ames asked like he was desperate.

  “It wasn’t needed then and I didn’t think you were this smitten with the girl. It’s been a long time coming.”

  Oh, gawd. He was talking about all the past girlfriends. I wanted to really die of embarrassment but it was a little awesome to know I might be the only girl who could keep the great and mighty Ames Cahn intrigued longer than the rest.

  I looked back and forth to between men. They both believed the whole combined abilities and calming thingy to be true. “Aside from the adventure to gain the knowledge, are you meaning his kiss is some all powerful true love’s kiss like Snow White or something? I’m in a freaking fairy tale?” And to think I was just joking about things like this the day all this began.

  “Go back to the all powerful kiss part. I like that. Best part of the tale,” Ames said way too smug ignoring my concerns.

  “Yeah. Watch it you. How do I know it wasn’t a bunch of magic hooey that made that powerful kiss so good?”

  “Oh, so it was so good was it?” He said “so good” inside of quotation marks with such a dopey grin I wanted to pop him across that kissable mouth with my fist.

  Oh, forget it. “Oh, yes oh sexy one. You are the god of perfect kissing.” So help me, he bowed to me.

  I huffed but I wasn’t really mad. “What does it mean, mister?” I didn’t know who this guard of all knowing was telling me I’d just kissed a guy and it made me queen of the broken to pieces castle.

  “Sorry, I’m Katelyn’s father, Brooks Tanner,” he stuck out his hand to me. “And it means that you are linked by lineage and that you have the choice of which realm you rule from.” He looked at Ames. “Yes, we are both aware of the written text in her own realm saying she has another destiny. We can deal with that later.”

  Ames gave him a knowing look like my destiny was an open book or something.

  I screwed my face up. “Ew. We are related?” I stuck my tongue out wanting him to be anything but joking.

  Brooks’ exasperated expression said otherwise. “Certainly not. If you were, would I have let you two tongue tango a few minutes ago?”

  Point well made. “So, then?” I was anxious to learn. This man was twice my age, and hard looking or not, I trusted him if Ames did.

  “So, it means a king and queen are reunited once more. It has been three generations since the true bloodlines found their way back to each ot
her.”

  This sounded strangely like relations again. “So were not related?” I asked for clarification.

  Brooks rolled his eyes and Ames let him have one of his rare smiles while eyeing my own movements intensely. “It means, sweet little one, that the kings and queens of old have found their way back because the two families that you descended from were both magical and keepers of the Goblins Guild. You just happen to be the offspring of a magical mistake in our history. Or happy coincidence. The realms separated and formed lines of opposition and your father took a leader position. Your great, great grandfather was the king of a realm in the upper Rocky Mountains. Perhaps now, we can have unity again. Perhaps it was all meant to be anyway and we are just puppets in the bigger game. Either way, the broken line will be restored.”

  “How is my family involved?”

  A look from Brooks to Ames passed over. “A little research in the library book rooms would be good for both of you. I sense that Ames wants to share much of the details himself, but I will add that sometimes a fortune told is a life ruined. Sometimes they are greased with wrongdoing. Better to check on these things thoroughly.”

  Ames was severely agitated with that statement, but it felt like a riddle to me.

  “I thought I had that covered already?” Ames asked Brooks.

  “More than likely.” Brooks didn’t smile.

  “O-kay. I will remember that.” I finally broke off my interrogation with Katelyn’s father to look at how Ames was taking all this with him knowing I was analyzing his face. His expression looked as if he just kept confirming his own suspicions, but it was his emotional energy that told me more. “You knew all this, didn’t you?”

  His careful gaze directed back to Brooks, “I will show her tonight and explain everything.”

  I should not have accepted this conversation as some kind of commonplace solution to what I evidently still didn’t know, but with Ames it had become a habit and I was yet to get dead or enslaved forever as it had looked at times. It would have to stop. And soon.

  Brooks nodded. “Very well, Master Cahn. If it would do well to honor you, I would like to take camp back inside and appoint someone...younger to the outside.”

  Ames didn’t flinch a muscle. “Done, only if you and Wicker can work together as Captain and Deputy to the guard in harmony and not habitually male bash each other?”

  Brooks shook his head. Wicker scoffed in the back. Brooks was aware of Wicker’s motivations.

  Ames smiled, “Done. And Wicker will continue over the newlings as he is so very good at it.”

  “And I will see to Joshlin and his whereabouts. It would behoove us to have his location ASAP!” Brooks stated.

  Wicker’s voice chimed in behind Brooks, “It would be my pleasure. I already have his long and lat. Just need a team to corner and cage him in. And I assume the post as teacher if, and only if, I can have Katelyn to assist me.”

  My face was suddenly alight. What was this?

  Ames answered him with a knowing smile, by Brooks frowned before answering, “I guess I can’t stop it. I am glad to have such a fine man added to the family.”

  Whoa! Did I miss something? Either way, I already felt ten times better even if no one caught me up or even thought of me until silent in the background Trigger chimed in.

  “Better tell her who you are now,” Trigger offered his wisdom stepping forward and draping an arm across my shoulders. “She’ll soon find out she has more than one fighting to have her.”

  A snarl emerged from Ames and Trigger backed away so fast.

  “She already knew who I was before today,” Ames aimlessly looked towards where Joshlin had been standing trapped by my knife attack. Was he seriously worried Joshlin could woo me from him?

  “You’re a little late to the party,” Katelyn sassed to Trigger. He made a face at her.

  “Well, if that doesn’t take all. Does she know all your other secrets? Like the ones that spell E.M.M.A across your forehead and how you haven’t noticed another girl since she showed up.”

  “Shut up, Trigger.” Ames had unknowingly moved closer to me—I think.

  “She has your balls gripped so tight—

  “Okay, stawp already!” I said. “She is standing right here, Oh Freckle-less Ones. If and when I want to know any of his secrets he is unwilling to share, I will be sure to come your way. And if I “pop” off with my magical destructiveness, I’ll be sure to aim it at you first.” My finger pointed straight to Trigger.

  I glared at his mouthy friend, but Ames was glaring straight at me with a hint of laughter in his eyes.

  AMES

  The matter of Brooks would be dealt with soon enough. He knew everything somehow. He’d been looking out for her, and me, for years. I’d always seen him as a substitute father in a way, but would never tell him. To find out he knew as much as me, if not more, was disturbing and comforting all in one. I couldn't believe he knows about the curse.

  Realms may be restored again with all that kings and queens of old crap, but there is still the matter of Caydon. He was my next obstacle, but before that came out, I needed to tell Emma other things. She was bound to me which left me secure with the surety of her loyalty. Kissing her was selfish and not entirely honest, but I wanted her for myself. She was good for our realm, myself included.

  Telling her who my brother was to who she now deemed a purely disgusting guise for a king was beyond stupidity, but I didn’t have any control over it. Apparently he’d taken care of it for me. But there was more. So much more.

  “There is something I still need to show you,” I forced myself to release her body, but not all of it. I kept her hand steadily in mine as I led her out of the destruction and to my Jeep. I would piece it together for her a little at a time and see her face when she saw each piece of the puzzle coming. It can’t be entrusted but to only the greats. Otherwise, we’d have a world war on a constant basis.

  I pulled the jacket back to the center and covered her chest once more. “First, I want you out of that dress.”

  Both of her eyebrows shot up, cheeks burning. I wish it were that easy.

  “I mean out of that dress. I have your bag in my car.”

  I hoped the grass was soft for her bare feet. I threw the shoes in the pile of rubble. It wasn’t her.

  When the shoes broke into pieces, I realized I caused it. I could usually hide my strength. And have well in front of her with few exceptions.

  “And your mighty Hercules strength is a king thing?” she asked.

  I shrugged really not sure, “I guess.”

  She let it go. It was something that always bothered me.

  “We need to go back to my cabin.” A tiny nod told me she heard me, but perhaps she was still in shock and needed reassurance. “The cabin is safe.”

  “That’s not why I’m nervous,” she answered to my real thoughts of trying to figure her out, but naturally I couldn’t. This male and female Mars and Venus thing was truer than they all said.

  “Can I help?”

  “Not with this, you’re the problem.” She looked down at her feet that were shifting back and forth. I peeked out around her to be sure we were still alone.

  “I’m the problem?” My lungs hurt saying it.

  “Yes, Ames. Ever since that day at school when you were standing with the fawning cheerleaders, I have felt...different.” Her nose crinkled up before she continued. “I can’t seem to stop thinking about you and I hate it.”

  I couldn’t stop my heart beating faster. “And that is so bad?”

  My approach changed as my hands snaked around to her hips a little tighter than ever before hoping to convince her I was in this for her.

  “Not bad....just new. I keep waiting for that great cloud of happiness to pop and remind me that my reality is never going to include well...happiness...or you.” Something in her voice wavered freezing my hands to her.

  “I won’t hurt you, Emma. I’m not like the other guys you’ve known though
I can’t help but want to rearrange their faces for having anything to do with you or what they did to hurt you.”

  It wasn't about me.

  I can’t stop the fascination I have had with her since that first day. I don’t know if I can name it, but she had me that day. Maybe it was her eyes, her unearthly drawn energy to me, or just simply it was the magic of who we are. I didn’t care what...I just wanted her no matter the cost.

  EMMA

  Oh, gawd. Did he know about the rumors?

  “What is it, Emma? Talk to me.”

  I didn’t mean other guys and the past. I meant that he might disappear of something. And I didn’t want to tell him about Rick. It made me open to hurt worse if he rejected me, but I couldn’t lie.

  “First, I meant I am afraid I will still lose you somehow. It had nothing to do with being hurt in the past.”

  He lightened his squeeze on my hips.

  “When I was with Rick,” I paused looking up to the sky away from his face, “I let him talk me into staying after cheer practice one day and wait for him to finish in the locker room after practice. We hid in the school for an hour making out in the lab. He said he wanted to be able to think of me when he was in class. I was naive and stupid.”

  I wouldn’t be able to tell him all of it. I’ve never told anyone. I wasn’t sure what Ames would think of me if he knew.

  I sighed heavily and walked away from him, hiding my eyes. “The next day he did it again during study hall when the lab was empty, but this time he told everyone I did more than just kiss him. I’m not that kind of girl and never intended for it to look that way. He just...”

  He’d followed where I escaped from his judging eyes. Still in a half-dressed state, his hand touched my bare skin where his jacket fell off my shoulder searing me with heat I never felt with Rick.

  “That was long ago and you are older now. You have nothing to hide from me. You have to let it go. He was a jerk who had no regard for your feelings and didn’t deserve you anyway. Besides, he was acting like a teenage boy with only hormones for brains. You didn’t know what he was capable of.”