One Summer in Italy…

by Lucy Gordon

  ‘Don’t you dare!’ she cried in horror. ‘I’d never forgive you.’

  ‘Then tell me how to persuade you.’

  ‘You can’t!’

  ‘I must. You’re the one person in the world that I can turn to, the only one I can rely on. You’re stronger than anyone I know. In some ways you’re stronger than me.’

  ‘But to suggest that we…Why me?’

  ‘Because there’s nobody else I can trust to protect Liza.’

  ‘Your mother-’

  ‘She’s an old lady, with a sick husband to care for. Apart from her my only family is a cousin that I can’t stand. She’s grim and hard, and hell will freeze over before I let Liza fall into her hands. Once you’re my wife I can make sure you’re her legal guardian if I’m killed.

  ‘Do this for me, Holly, I beg you. It doesn’t have to be a real marriage, just the legal formality, and I won’t ask more than that.’

  ‘Are you saying-?’

  ‘I’ll keep my distance, I swear it.’

  Holly stood still, feeling herself trapped in the circle of his arms that had wound fiercely around her, almost like a steel cage. There was no escape, yet something perverse inside her persisted in fighting until the end.

  ‘I can’t-I can’t-’

  ‘You must, you must. I won’t let you go until you say yes. Holly, you have got to do this.’

  She stared fixedly into his eyes, trying to read there something that would help her. But all she could see was a terrified determination to have his own way, and she was sure of it when he played his last and most unarguable card.

  ‘If it weren’t for Liza, think where you could be now. It wasn’t me who saved you. It was her, in those first few minutes on the train, telling them your name was Holly, screaming at them to go. You owe her.’

  ‘That’s a cheap shot,’ she flashed.

  He shrugged, half releasing her. ‘Sure it is. I’ll be as cheap as I have to if it makes you say yes. I warned you I’m not a nice man when I want something. Cross me and I’ll fight until you give in. No holds barred.’

  It was true. All his least likeable characteristics were on display because he reckoned they were his best weapons. At this moment, when he was asking her to be his wife, tossing his wealth and status into her lap, part of her disliked him as never before. The other part pitied him so that her heart ached.

  And it was true. She owed the little girl everything.

  ‘All right,’ she murmured. ‘For Liza.’

  As soon as the words were out she was filled with misgiving. But she was committed now.

  He dropped his hands, but still looked at her intently. ‘You mean it? You won’t go back on that?’

  ‘I’ve given my word.’

  Suddenly neither of them could think of anything more to say. They could only look at each other helplessly for a long moment, before opening the door, to find Galina, who’d been shamelessly listening. She was weeping with relief.

  The whole household, down to the last gardener, entered into a conspiracy to prevent Liza learning about the situation. Radio and television sets were kept switched off and no newspapers entered the house.

  ‘All fear must be kept from her,’ Galina said heavily. ‘She must never know that her father’s life is in danger.’

  Like Matteo, Galina had accepted without question that it was her duty to carry on as normal. Holly marvelled at her courage. She wasn’t so sure of her own. Already she was a part of what was happening here, caught up in a fearful dream, with no end that she could see.

  ‘With all my heart I thank you for agreeing to become my son’s wife,’ Galina said to her. ‘Soon I must go home to my husband. I shall feel easier in my mind, knowing that you are here to take care of Matteo.’

  ‘I’m chiefly here to take care of Liza,’ Holly said quickly.

  ‘Yes, of course. He has explained that to me.’

  ‘I only hope that I can do all that Matteo expects of me.’

  ‘That depends whether you ever come to love him. You once implied that it was impossible.’

  Galina’s tone contained a question, but Holly had no answer to give her.

  ‘I don’t know any more now than I did then,’ she sighed.

  ‘But you said you’d marry him.’

  ‘I had to. He wasn’t going to take no for an answer.’

  ‘That’s his way,’ Galina agreed. ‘You will have to be strong to stand up to him.’

  ‘He says that I am. He says in some ways I’m stronger than he is.’

  ‘I agree. I’m glad he understands himself, and you, so well. But strength isn’t enough, Holly. He will need your love. Please try to give it to him.’

  She didn’t wait for a reply, but plunged deep into arrangements for the wedding. One of them was overseeing the preparation of the room that had once belonged to Carol, and which had been locked ever since. In no time Galina had an army of servants cleaning it out.

  Holly felt slightly uncomfortable about this, but Galina said firmly, ‘You are the mistress now. You. Nobody else.’

  ‘But Galina-’

  ‘No ghosts,’ said her future mother-in-law. ‘Not in this house.’

  Which left Holly wondering just how much Galina had guessed.

  Matteo showed no emotion when he walked into the room and heard his mother’s plans. He merely nodded, thanked her and departed.

  She had feared Liza’s reaction to the wedding. While part of her loved Holly, part of her still grieved for her mother, and Holly half expected her to be upset at seeing that mother supplanted. But Liza had smiled and hugged her, and Holly understood that the child had explained it all to herself in a way that satisfied her.

  She was even content to see Holly move out of her room and into the one Galina prepared for her as the new mistress of the house. It satisfied her sense of what was right and proper, and strangely made her feel even safer.

  ‘And I’m not far away,’ Holly pointed out. ‘Just across the corridor.’

  Liza smiled, content.

  A special licence was obtained for a hurried wedding, to take place in two days’ time, in the private chapel at the back of the house. A few close friends were invited and everything was to be kept as secret as possible. Only Liza had any fault to find with this. She wanted to celebrate properly, and it was impossible to tell her the truth-that if the news leaked out that Judge Fallucci had married so quickly after Fortese’s escape, it would be practically an announcement that he was expecting the worst.

  That this was no ordinary wedding was brought home to Holly in a dozen little ways, starting with Matteo saying, ‘Order your clothes online and have them delivered. On no account go into Rome.’

  She didn’t have to ask why. She had said she was plunging into the unknown. Now she discovered how true that was.

  Another time Matteo returned her passport to her. She studied it, her familiar name, and the face that now seemed to belong to someone else.

  ‘So now I’m me again,’ she murmured. ‘Whoever that is.’

  The man who was to be her husband was a mystery to her. She knew that the tragedy of his marriage and his ruined fatherhood had caused him to shut down his heart. She knew him to be suspicious, harsh, exacting and alarmingly vulnerable. Beyond that she knew nothing.

  Matteo spent the day before the wedding locked in his study with a civil lawyer who had brought papers for him to examine. The actual signing would take place tomorrow, immediately after the ceremony. He showed them to Holly, who saw that her legal position had been safeguarded. She was Liza’s guardian and the trustee for the child’s inheritance, which was two-thirds of Matteo’s fortune. The other third came to herself, plus a lump sum that became hers as soon as she was his wife.

  When she saw the size of that sum she stared in astonishment.

  ‘It’s only fair,’ Matteo said before she could speak. ‘Let’s say no more about it.’

  Her dress was a modest design of ivory lace, worn with a small,
flowered hat. By good luck, the online store also had one small dress that exactly matched it, and Holly bought this for Liza, her bridesmaid.

  The night before the wedding they were joined by his only other family members, the cousin who antagonised him and her husband. Holly disliked her on sight, and knew that it was mutual. Now she understood why Matteo was determined to keep Liza away from her, and that was a help. It enabled her to focus her whirling thoughts.

  When the family was saying goodnight and mounting the stairs Matteo said quietly, ‘Will you give me a few moments?’ and showed her into his study.

  So many times they had talked in the severe room, starting with the first night, when they had faced each other as adversaries whose mutual dependence drove them mad. Now they met for a reason that was almost as difficult.

  ‘These are for you,’ Matteo said, indicating something on his desk.

  She was stunned at the sight of the three-stranded pearl necklace and matching earrings. Ignorant as she was about jewels, even she could see that these were real, and fabulously expensive.

  ‘My wedding gift,’ Matteo said.

  She fingered them lovingly, awed by their beauty. But then a horrid thought struck her.

  ‘They’re not-you didn’t-?’

  ‘No, I didn’t give them to Carol. I wouldn’t insult you like that. Carol’s jewels are locked away until I can give them to Liza. My mother chose these to go with your dress.’

  If this had been a real wedding he would have chosen her gift himself. If he had loved her he would have draped the pearls around her neck and fastened them. If she had loved him she would have given him something in return. As it was-

  ‘I haven’t got anything for you,’ she said. ‘I’d forgotten about presents.’

  ‘You’re already giving me the only thing I want or need. No other gift could mean anything next to that. Now, it’s getting late, and we should both retire. Tomorrow will be a heavy day.’

  He held out the jewel box in businesslike fashion, she took it in the same way, and they bid each other goodnight.

  Galina waylaid her on the stairs, full of delight, and led her into her new room.

  ‘I had your things moved in here an hour ago,’ she said. ‘There won’t be time tomorrow. You sleep here tonight.’

  Her nightgown was laid out on the great bed. Her personal things were on the dressing table. There was nothing for her to do. In this drama she was really little more than a bit-player.

  When she was alone she went around the room, trying to get her bearings. The house was several hundred years old, built at a time of greater formality. So the master and mistress occupied separate rooms, with a door connecting them. She stood before that door, trying to picture Matteo’s room on the other side. There was no sound and she guessed he was still downstairs.

  She undressed, turned out the light and went to the window, where the curtains were still drawn back, and sat on the window seat, watching the moonlit garden. Now and then she glanced at the slight gap beneath the door where any light would show. There was none, and she wondered what he was doing downstairs. Was he finding excuses to stay there, unwilling to come to bed?

  At last she heard his outer door opening and closing. But the light didn’t come on. Instead there was the sound of footsteps, then the soft click as the connecting door opened.

  He had promised not to come to her, but it hadn’t occurred to her to check whether that door was locked. Now she sat, frozen, as he appeared. He was in his shirtsleeves, the collar torn open.

  Slowly he went to the bed and stood there, looking down. The moon, shining in, showed clearly that there was nobody there.

  He didn’t know she was there, Holly realised. Galina must have forgotten to tell him. He had come here because it was Carol’s room.

  Slowly, terrified that he would notice her, she rose and moved further back into the shadows. From here she could see the outline of his face but not his expression as he regarded the bed where he had once known such joy and such bitterness. It was impossible to tell which of the two he was remembering as his eyes were deep-sunk black hollows from which all light had vanished.

  He seemed to stand there forever, motionless, as though transfixed by thoughts too sad for words. Holly held her breath, afraid that he would sense her there, perhaps because her heart was beating so loudly that he was bound to hear it.

  But at last he gave a sigh, as if the strength had drained out of him, leaving him only just able to stand. Slowly he turned and walked out of the room. After a moment Holly heard the key turn in the lock on his side.

  Next morning Galina and Liza helped her to dress. Then they went to the chapel, where Liza took her place as bridesmaid, and they advanced down the aisle.

  When Holly saw Matteo standing by the altar, waiting for her, the mists of the dream shifted and she discovered that it was really happening.

  But then another reality intruded. This was a different Matteo, ten years younger, full of love and joy as he watched his beloved approach, to become his wife. That trusting young man had believed that a life of perfect happiness was opening for him.

  How much of that other wedding was he remembering? Was he looking at her and seeing Carol, the one great love of his life, whose betrayal had ruined him for all other women? Did he regret this impulsive decision?

  His face gave no clue. As she drew level he inclined his head to her, but he had no expression. His eyes, as he took her hand, were blank.

  It went like clockwork. The words were spoken, the promises were given, the ties were bound. She was his wife.

  No wedding would be complete without photographs, so they posed again and again, while one of Matteo’s friends took the shots that were expected: the bride and groom with the groom’s mother and little girl, the bride and Liza, happy together, the groom and his daughter, his mouth smiling, his eyes wary.

  When it could no longer be avoided the bride and groom stood together, his arm about her shoulders. In the total unreality of this day she found it unnerving to be pressed so close to him, smiling into his face.

  But there she saw that it was the same with him. His eyes met hers and his lips moved silently saying, ‘Bear up. Not long to go.’

  It was only a moment, but it told her that they were on the same side, and after that it was easier.

  The wedding breakfast was a sedate affair, with some short speeches, a few toasts. Then it was time for everyone to go. Watching the departure, Holly saw that the grounds were filled with unfamiliar figures and she realised that an extra contingent of police were guarding her wedding.

  Finally the last guest had gone, although the officer in charge assured them that his men would remain in the grounds. Matteo thanked him formally and invited him into his study for ‘further discussion’. Relieved, Holly hurried upstairs to where Galina was putting Liza to bed.

  The child was slightly shocked to see her.

  ‘You should be drinking champagne with Poppa,’ she said.

  ‘We’ll do that later,’ Holly said. ‘Not all weddings are alike.’

  ‘Yes, they are,’ Liza insisted. ‘You get married and you drink champagne, and you go away on honeymoon.’

  ‘There wasn’t time to arrange that,’ Galina said hurriedly.

  ‘Will you have one later?’

  ‘Not for some time,’ Holly said. ‘Your father has a lot of work to do for the next few months.’

  ‘But where will you go?’

  ‘We’ll talk about that another time,’ Holly improvised.

  Luckily this kept Liza content for the next few minutes while she went through a list of places she considered suitable. They grew crazier with every minute and the three of them were laughing when Matteo came in.

  Galina immediately declared that she was ready for bed. Before departing she told Matteo, ‘We were just settling your honeymoon, when you have time for it. Liza favours Timbuktu.’

  To Holly’s relief Matteo joined in the game, declaring that
he could think of much more outrageous places. All went well until Liza said, ‘I won’t come in too early. Promise.’

  ‘Come in?’ Matteo echoed.

  ‘Your room. Remember how I used to come in, in the mornings, and bring you coffee?’ She gave a happy sigh. ‘And you and Mamma would be all snuggled up together, cosy and warm.’ She looked worried. ‘Don’t you remember?’

  ‘Yes, piccina,’ Matteo said in a voice that wasn’t quite steady. ‘I remember.’

  ‘And it will be just the same, won’t it?’ Liza asked anxiously.

  Matteo couldn’t reply. Holly could feel the air vibrating with strain, and it was she who said, ‘Yes, darling, it’s all right. It will be exactly the same.’

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  AS SOON as they were alone in her bedroom Matteo turned to face her.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ he said urgently. ‘I promised to keep to my own room and I meant it. I had no idea this would happen. Holly, please say that you believe me.’

  ‘Of course I do. I know you’re a man of your word.’

  ‘I had forgotten how Liza used to come in to see us in the mornings. I didn’t know it meant that much to her.’

  ‘But she gave you the clue,’ Holly reminded him. ‘She said you and Carol were “snuggled up together, cosy and warm.”’ She smiled. ‘It made me think of a pair of cats I once had. They were elderly neuters, and they slept wrapped around each other because that way they were blissfully content. Seeing you two like that made Liza feel safe, and it’s that safety she wants back.’

  ‘Then what do we do?’

  ‘Give her what she wants. That’s what this is all about.’

  ‘You mean we have to guess when she’s going to arrive in the morning? I set an alarm clock, or do you come next door and awaken me?’

  She regarded him with an exasperation that had a touch of fondness.

  ‘I don’t think that would work,’ she said slowly.

  They looked at each other. He spoke cautiously.

  ‘So your suggestion is-that we spend the night like a pair of elderly neutered cats?’

  ‘Not the whole night. Just the last half-hour. That bed must be eight feet wide. Room enough to stay clear of each other.’