Radclyffe - Love's Masquerade

by Love's Masquerade (lit)

  "Is anything?" :

  Gayle shook her head. "There are a million things that could go wrong along the way, Aud."

  "Yes, but there's a chance. Right? That's what you're saying."

  "A coin toss. Maybe not even that."

  Auden smiled, and this time it reached her eyes. "Those sound like decent odds to me."

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  ----- Original Message-----

  From: Rune@HeartLand.com

  Sent: Tuesday April 1, 5:35 PM

  To : AFrost@PalmPub.net

  Subject: Meeting

  Ms. Frost:

  I apologize for the delay in getting back to you regarding your request for a meeting. I was unavoidably, but most pleasantly, diverted by a pressing personal matter.

  Although I realize this is short notice, if you are free this evening, I would be delighted if you would join me for dinner.

  I've taken the liberty of sending a car to your home at 7:30pm. If you are otherwise engaged, I hope that we can reschedule for a more convenient time.

  Yours very truly.

  Rune Dyre

  Auden looked at her watch. Oh my God, Six-fifteen.

  -----Reply-----

  From: AFrost@PalmPub.net

  Sent: Tuesday April 1, 6:16 PM

  To : Rune@HeartLand.com

  Subject: Re: Meeting

  Rune:

  Thank you for the gracious invitation. I am very much looking forward to seeing you this evening.

  Most sincerely,

  Auden Frost

  Then she jumped up, pushed papers into her briefcase, and rushed to the door. She was a block from her house when she ran into Gayle, who was walking Shylock.

  "Hi, honey," Gayle called, falling into step. "Where's the fire?"

  "I'm in a rush. I've got a date with Rune."

  "You're seeing someone else?" Gale stopped dead in the middle of the sidewalk. "Wait a minute. Rune? Rune Dyre? You're seeing Rune Dyre?"

  Auden took Gayle by the arm and tugged her along. "No, Hays. Come in with me while I get ready."

  "I'm so confused," Gayle grumbled as she followed Auden inside and through to the bedroom, Shylock padding along behind. "Who do you have a date with?"

  "Hays," Auden said. "Who else?"

  "But you said Rune."

  "Oh, sorry—Thane didn't tell you? Hays is Rune." Auden began to rapidly undress. "I have to shower. Come into the bathroom and talk to me."

  "I can't believe it. Hays is Rune? Oh my God, that's amazing." Gayle leaned against the sink as Auden jumped into the shower. Raising her voice to be heard above the running water, she shouted, "Teddy never said a word. I'm going to kill her. Right after I throw her down and ravish her."

  "I take it she didn't sleep on the couch?"

  "You got that right, but we barely made it to the bedroom."

  "Why doesn't that surprise me?" Auden's voice was muffled for a moment, and then she said, "Who jumped whom?"

  "Who do you think?"

  Auden stepped out and extended her hand. "Towel. Thanks." She wrapped it around her hair and pulled another one from a nearby rack, covering her body. "You."

  "Did you say that just because you know me better than Teddy?" Gayle asked with true curiosity.

  "Not really. When I watched the two of you dancing together at the 2-4, it struck me how tender Thane seemed with you. I just had the feeling she'd let you make the decision as to when."

  "So she's all Ms. Sensitive and I'm just a sex fiend?" Gayle bounced on the bed, looking anxious, an expression that was foreign for her. "Maybe I've forgotten how to do anything with a woman except have sex."

  "That's not true.'' Auden tilted her head as she slipped in an earring, regarding her friend affectionately, aware of the hint of hurt in Gayle's voice, "I happen to know for a fact that you're incredibly sensitive. I also know how attracted you are to her. I don't think there's anything wrong with sleeping with her."

  "Before the wedding?"

  Auden laughed. "I'm willing to bet you didn't have to drag her into the bedroom. Why are you beating yourself up about this?"

  "Sorry." Gayle shrugged sheepishly. "It's just that I...I don't want to mess up with this one, Aud."

  "You mean she's more than just a pretty face?"

  "Not to mention a fabulous body, but, yeah—she's special."

  "I can't imagine you have to worry. I don't think I've seen her look at anyone else since the moment you were introduced to her at the Four Seasons. She certainly didn't look at anyone else the other night at the club." She shook out her hair and reached for the blow dryer, giving her hair a quick once over, "Do I need to ask if it was outstanding?"

  "The sex was mind blowing." Gayle followed Auden back into the bedroom. Shylock had curled up on the foot of the bed, trying his best to be invisible. She sat down next to him and absently petted his head. In an unaccustomedly small voice, she said, "But that wasn't the best part."

  Auden turned from her closet, her expression quizzical. "What do you mean?"

  "I think I liked holding her and waking up with her as much as the unbelievable sex."

  "Uh-oh. That sounds serious. Are you smitten?"

  Gayle nodded forlornly. "Looks like it."

  "That's wonderful. I mean it." Auden pulled out a dress and a pair of black silk trousers, and held up one in each hand. "Help me."

  "Where are you going?"

  "I don't know. Rune—Hays—is sending a car."

  "Ooh, sending a car. One of these days you're going to have to tell me what it's like sleeping with one of the goddesses of romance."

  "Maybe." Auden blushed, but she smiled with delight. "Besides, you've got a love goddess all your own. Thane Cutlass is known for her hot love scenes. And believe me, when Eros hits the shelves, she'll be famous."

  "Eros?"

  "It's an anthology that Thane and Rune are doing. Erotica—you know, sex and love and stuff."

  "And you've read it?"

  Gayle sounded jealous, and Auden thought sure she could detect a slight pout. Grinning, she nodded, "Well, yeah. I'm their editor."

  "I hate you. Are the stories good? Are Teddy's really, really hot?"

  "Buy the book." Auden ducked as Gayle threw a pillow, then gestured to the clothes again. "Come on...so what do you think?"

  "If you don't know the agenda, I'd wear the pants with a slinky top. That will dress up or down depending on the occasion." Gale nodded her approval at a burgundy silk blouse that Auden held up for her inspection. "Perfect. So, Auden, tell me—is Hays anything like Rune...inbed?"

  "Gayle, sweetie. Rune doesn't exist."

  "Of course she does." Gayle was adamant and absolutely serious. "She writes books, she has hundreds of fans, she answers e-mail, she writes articles and essays. Of course she exists."

  "Hays is passionate and intense and incredibly sensitive, exactly as Rune's writing would suggest her to be. I didn't compare the sex point for point." Auden smiled shyly. "That would require more mental power than I'm capable of when she's touching me."

  "Jesus." Gayle flopped back on the bed, arms outspread, groaning. "Auden, cut it out. I'm not going to see Teddy for three more days."

  "You asked."

  "Yeah, but I didn't expect you to get that really sexy tone in your voice when you answered. Jesus."

  "Well, you've never heard me talk about sex before. Come to think of it, I never have." Auden reached down and grabbed her friend's hand, pulling her to an upright position. Then she turned in a circle. "What do you think?"

  "I think you look gorgeous." Tenderly, she said, "I hope you have the most wonderful evening."

  "I can't wait to see her." A shadow passed across Auden's face. "Sometimes, I forget all the rest of it. Sometimes for a minute or two at a time."

  "That's how it's supposed to work. You're supposed to exult in the joy and hold on to every second of happiness you find." Gayle stood and put her hands lightly on Auden's shoulders. "Both of you need to celebrate th
is new love. It will make you strong."

  She didn't say, For when the hard times come. But the words hung in the air between them.

  "That sounds like a plan." Auden's voice was thick and tears shimmered on her lashes, but they did not fall. "Thank you. For today."

  Gayle took Auden into her arms, resting her cheek against Auden's. "I'm going to be with you every step of the way." She kissed her lightly on the forehead. "And tonight, try to pay a little bit more attention during the good parts, I'm dying to know if she makes love the way she writes it."

  Auden slid into the back of the chauffeur-driven black Town Car, self-conscious and charmed at the same time. A small cream-colored envelope lay on the seat next to a single red rose. Her name in bold script was written on the front. She carefully opened it, not wanting to crease the flap or damage it in any way. Silly. But I don't care.

  Auden,

  Last night was the most beautiful evening of my life. I dout that I will ever be able to show you how much it meant to me, but I'd like to try.

  Thank you so much for gracing me with your presence this evening.

  Yours most truly, Hays.

  Auden's eyes filled with tears and she quickly looked out the window, trying to distract herself by guessing her destination. The car was headed east on Pine Street into the heart of Society Hill, an enclave of historic brownstones lining narrow cobblestone streets. Blindly, she reached for the rose and cradled it in her lap between her clasped ringers. What am I going to do if I lose you now?

  "Here we are, Ms. Frost," the driver announced as the car slid to a stop in front of a four-story brownstone separated from the street by a low wrought-iron fence and box hedges. Two sconces on either side of a massive wooden door lit the short walk to the marble steps.

  "Thank you," she said as she stepped from the vehicle. She'd tucked the envelope into her coat pocket and held the rose carefully in her right hand. As she walked up the sidewalk, the front door opened. Hays stood backlit by the soft glow from a chandelier in the foyer beyond.

  "Hello, Hays," Auden said softly as she stepped close to her.

  "Hello." Hays leaned forward and kissed Auden gently, taking her free hand. "Please come in."

  Behind them the car slipped away.

  Following into the wide foyer, Auden scarcely noted the polished antique furnishings and deep, rich carpets. All she could see was Hays, who wore simple black trousers and a black silk shirt, open at the throat; her sleeves bloused slightly as they tapered to broad French cuffs. Gold links sparkled at her wrists. Auden watched her move, and, for a fleeting instant, felt her stretched along the length of her own body. She gasped.

  Hays stopped to search Auden's face, her dark eyes luminous. "All right?"

  "Oh, yes," Auden breathed. "Perfect."

  "Let me take your coat...and do something with that rose."

  "Be careful with it," Auden murmured, as she handed over the stem and slid the coat from her shoulders. "It's very special."

  Hays smiled. "I shall handle it gently."

  "I know you will."

  For an instant they stood close together, their eyes holding, the air about them growing still and thick with silence. A pulse beat steadily in Hays's neck, full and strong. Gently, Auden rested her fingers there. Hays closed her eyes.

  "I'm sorry," Auden whispered as she pressed closer, bringing her other hand to rest against the back of Hays's neck, fingers trailing into soft hair. "But I've wanted to do this all day."

  Auden's kiss was slow and light, the merest brush of lips over Hays's, a gentle exploration of the very inner surface of her lips. All she wanted, everything she wanted at that moment, was to feel the warmth and tenderness of Hays's body as the blood flowed vigorously beneath her ringers with each beat of Hays's heart. When Auden drew her mouth away, Hays's eyes were open, the pupils wide and flickering faintly. She was breathing shallowly.

  "No need to apologize...for that," Hays managed around a throat choked with desire. "I. .uh.. .where was I?"

  "Coat," Auden murmured, stroking Hays's cheek and moving back a step. "Rose."

  "Oh. Yes." Hays blinked and her vision cleared a little. Then she grinned. "Rune would have a sexy line right about now."

  "You don't need one."

  "Maybe later."

  "Mmm," Auden acknowledged, unable to take her eyes from Hays's face.

  "The living room is just up the hall to your right. Let me do something with these." Hays indicated the things she still held in her hands.

  "All right." What Auden really wanted to do was follow her around the house. She didn't want Hays out of her sight. Wondering if this feeling was normal or merely a result of fear, she forced herself to smile. "Go ahead. I'll find it."

  Auden stood in front of the fireplace, watching the burning logs, when Hays returned. Smiling softly, she said, "Your home is beautiful."

  "Thanks." Hays stopped a few feet away. "Would you like a tour now or after dinner?"

  "Dinner first, I think."

  Hays held out her hand and Auden took it, following into the dining room. The room was high-ceilinged and lit with another chandelier that cast warm shadows over the space. The formal table had been laid with two settings, one at the end and the other immediately beside it. Silver covered serving dishes sat on adjacent warmers. Very elegant. Very intimate.

  "This is wonderful," Auden breathed.

  "Rune's idea."

  Auden laughed out loud. "Of course. She lives here, too, I take it?"

  Hays grinned. "Mostly upstairs in the study."

  "Will you show me later? I'd like to see where you work."

  "Anything you like." Hays pulled out Auden's chair for her, then took the adjoining seat. She leaned over to lift a bottle of wine from a standing wine cooler, then held it up for Auden's inspection. "May I?"

  "Yes, please." Auden indicated the serving dishes as Hays poured. "Shall I get us started?"

  Hays nodded, and they passed plates back and forth in silence for a moment. After the first few bites, Auden closed her eyes and moaned softly. "Tell me you cooked this."

  "Uh...no." Hays sighed loudly. "Damn, and I so wanted to impress you."

  Smiling, Auden shook her head. "I'm actually glad that you didn't, I'm not sure I could ever match this as it is."

  "You don't need to," Hays said seriously, taking Auden's hand and raising it to her lips. She kissed her palm. "This is to say thank you."

  "Don't," Auden whispered, the meal forgotten as she watched Hays's mouth lightly touch her skin. "Don't ever say thank you to me for loving you."

  Hays stiffened, her eyes growing opaque. "Auden, no,"

  "Oh God, I really said that, didn't I?" Auden closed her fingers around Hays's hand, sensing that she was about to draw away. "Well, it's true. I won't take it back."

  "You can't," Hays said quietly. "We can't."

  "Why not?"

  Hays lowered their joined hands to the table and stared at them, hers so much paler than Auden's even now, when she was about as healthy as she ever could be. "You know why not."

  "No, I don't," Auden said clearly. "I know you're ill. That doesn't mean we can't have something together."

  "We can date." Hays didn't look at her.

  "Fine. I'd like that. My turn to surprise you next time." Auden watched Hays carefully. It was the first time she could ever recall that Hays wouldn't meet her eyes.

  "It can't be serious."

  "It already is." Auden shifted her chair and put her free hand under Hays's jaw, very gently turning her head. When Hays finally looked into her eyes, she demanded, "Tell me it isn't."

  Hays was silent for a long moment, then shook her head. "I can't let you do this."

  "Which part would you like to stop? The part where we talk, or the part where we work together, or the part where we touch?" Auden took a steadying breath. "It's all part of what we have, and I don't want to give any of it up. I want more, not less."

  "Is six months, a year, going to b
e enough?" Hays's voice was harsh, heavy with anger and frustration.

  "No, it isn't," Auden said softly. "Not nearly enough. But it's a start."

  "You know—"

  "What about the bone marrow transplant?"

  "Jesus..." Hays rocked back in her seat. "How do you know about that?"

  "Gayle."

  Hays closed her eyes. "It's not that simple."

  "Yes, I got that much from what Gayle told me, and I'll admit I don't understand it all. So help me."

  "This was supposed to be a romantic evening and look what's happened to it." Hays sat forward, her expression intent. "Is this what you want your life to be about? Talking about my illness? Thinking about my future, what there is of it?"

  "No, it isn't. But this is part of being with you, so I'd like to talk about it now." Auden leaned forward and kissed the tip of Hays's chin. "And then I'd like to spend the rest of the evening thinking about how much I love the way you look at me."

  Hays groaned. "You aren't going to be reasonable, are you?"

  "I'll try to be," Auden replied, completely serious. "Explain to me why you haven't had the transplant."

  "Because the quality of my life has been decent, and I have things to do with the time I have left." Hays's voice was low, heavy with resignation and the finality of acceptance. "I don't want to waste any of it, and the transplant might not work." Hays looked into Auden's eyes. "Six months is precious if you only have twelve."

  Auden was suddenly very cold, and she tried not to shiver. She put her hands in her lap and clasped her fingers together. The room was pleasantly warm, but her body was ice. "But you'll do it, if...there's no other choice?"

  "I don't know," Hays said quietly. "I hate the idea of being helpless, of letting them kill off what's left of my defenses. Of dying without even being able to fight."

  Auden couldn't stand it. She couldn't have this conversation while being this far away from Hays. There was so much more they had to discuss, but she needed surcease, just for a little while, from the pain. "Do you think we could cover the food and sit by the fire for a minute? I'm freezing."

  "Of course." Hays stood, her expression instantly concerned. "Don't you feel well?"

  "No, I'm fine. Just a chill." She stood, taking Hays's hand, and nodded toward the living room. "How about sitting next to me and sharing a little body heat?"