The Hazards of Sex on the Beach

by Alyssa Rose Ivy

  “I know, but how am I supposed to face him?” A few weeks before when I’d asked the same question, I’d cried. This time, I didn’t. That was progress. Truthfully, I’d been in much better shape since my trip to the beach. The only problem was that I found myself thinking about Chase more than I wanted to.

  “You hold your head up. You’re a beautiful, smart, talented girl. You don’t need someone like him. You deserve better, and you’ll find it.” From the expression on her face, she was thinking about herself more than me. She’d suffered a similar breakup in college just to meet my dad months later. She was definitely a firm believer in fate.

  “It’s only a few months.” I said the words more for my own benefit than my mom’s.

  “Don’t rush the time away. You’re only a college sophomore once. Spend time with your friends, date other guys. Live it up.”

  “I know.” I kissed her on the cheek. “I’ll call you when I get in.”

  “Drive safe.” She gave me another hug. I held onto her as long as I could.

  “I will.” I grabbed the last of my stuff and got in my eight-year-old CRV. It was time to face reality.

  ***

  “Are you okay?” Juliet picked up her phone on the first ring.

  “Yeah. I’m fine. I’m only about twenty minutes from campus.” I turned off at the now familiar exit for Charleston, South Carolina.

  “I’ve been calling you for weeks. I’m so sorry. Aaron is such a jerk ass.”

  “Jerk ass? That’s a new one.”

  “It’s good though, right?” Juliet always knew how to make me laugh. She had this sarcastic side to her personality that with most people I usually couldn’t stand, but it completely worked for her.

  “I think it’s the perfect description for what he is.” Or jackass, or biggest idiot in the world. I could go on and on forever.

  “I’ve been so worried. When Reed told me…”

  “I don’t want to mess up anything with you guys. Please don’t worry about it.” Juliet and Reed were probably the cutest, most balanced couple I knew. She was so happy with him that I refused to get in the way.

  “Mess anything up? Reed agrees Aaron screwed up big time, but he also said maybe it was for the best because you deserve better.”

  “Reed said that?” Juliet’s boyfriend was a great guy, but he was also Aaron’s best friend.

  “Yes. He knows how amazing you are.”

  “I left some stuff in Aaron’s room. Could you get it for me? I don’t want to go over there or see his bed ever again.”

  “Already done. I wondered where your extra phone charger went.”

  I felt a weight lift off me. Getting my stuff was one of the things I was dreading most. “Thanks so much.”

  “Not a problem. I did it right after kicking him in the groin. Now that was the more fun part.”

  “What?” I nearly swerved into the shoulder of the road, but I corrected at the last second. “You didn’t.”

  “Oh yes I did. And when he screamed like a baby, Reed told him to man up because his actions were anything but that of a man.”

  “Wow. Crazy.”

  “Mallory was mad I got to him first, but she did slap him.”

  I smiled picturing my other roommate pouting because Juliet beat her to the punch. “I have the best friends.”

  “Because you’re a great one. I can’t wait to see you. I promise it’s all going to be okay.” Juliet’s words hit home even more than my mother’s. Maybe it was because she was going to be there with me. Facing Aaron was going to be hard no matter how I did it, but it would be much easier to do with my friends at my side.

  “I know it is, plus I did something crazy the other night. I have to tell you about it.”

  “Oh?” Her voice lilted. I had her attention.

  “It involves a hot guy, and I don’t even know his last name.”

  “Cara!” She shrieked.

  “What? What did she do?” I heard Mallory in the background. I hadn’t realized she was there, but I didn’t mind. The three of us generally told each other everything. I hoped they weren’t too annoyed at me for avoiding their calls for the past few weeks.

  “I’ll tell you guys later. I’ll be there soon.”

  “Okay. See ya, Cara.”

  “We love you!” Mallory yelled.

  I smiled as I turned toward campus.

  Juliet and Mallory were waiting on the front porch of our sorority house when I arrived. A spot right out front was open—making me immediately suspicious. Suspicious or not, I wasn’t going to pass by the space. Juliet ran down the steps and yanked open my door before I’d even cut the engine. “You’re here!”

  I unbuckled. “Who did you boot from this spot to save it for me?”

  “No one. I left my truck there until you called.” Mallory smiled. “That’s why it was so easy to park. Your car’s half the size of mine.”

  Without waiting, my roommates pulled out my bags from the back and started walking toward the house.

  I grabbed my remaining bags and followed. I’d definitely over packed for the month long break. Juliet keyed in the code and held open the door.

  We walked straight through the living room where I was given quite a few sympathetic looks from my sisters. Clearly, the news had spread. I smiled as brightly as possible and headed upstairs.

  I followed the girls into our room. “Uh, what’s that?” I pointed to a giant brown teddy bear with a blue bow lying on my bed.

  “We figured you might need someone to cuddle with. He’s cute, big, but he won’t snore or come with any annoying baggage.”

  I laughed. “You guys are crazy.”

  “Yeah. Yeah. Now spill.” Juliet sat down on my bed, snuggling my new bear against her.

  “Hey. You have someone to snuggle with.” I pulled it back and sat on my bed, leaning back on the pillows covered in pale pink pillow cases.

  Juliet crossed her arms. “Fine, but tell us about this guy.”

  “This guy with no last name.” Mallory sat down by my feet. She had her long brown hair pulled back in a braid. It was a different look for her.

  “Love the hair, and he does have a last name, I just don’t know it.”

  “And? What happened with this guy?”

  I took a deep breath. “I had sex with him… on the beach.”

  “What?” They both shrieked.

  Mallory’s eyes gaped open. “Please tell me you used protection.”

  “Of course, and remember that you hooked up with Colt on a whim.” I clearly remembered Mallory sharing the details of her one night stand. Of course, her hookup became a relationship and mine wouldn’t. I hadn’t even given Chase my number.

  “I’ve known Colt forever.”

  “Don’t bother starting in on Dylan.” Juliet cringed when she said her ex’s name. She’d hooked up with her long time crush while skinny dipping. My story may have even beaten hers.

  “Well, I did it. The sex was incredible, and he was the complete opposite of my type, and I just walked away.”

  “And you’re okay with that?” Juliet turned to look at me.

  “Yes. He asked for my number, and I said no.”

  “Wow. That’s really not like you.” Juliet messed with her chipped nail polish.

  “Guys, it was good. It was exactly what I needed. I made such a big deal about losing my virginity to Aaron, but now he’s not the only guy I’ve been with. It’s better this way. Sex doesn’t have to be the big deal I made it.”

  Mallory and Juliet exchanged a look.

  “So who wants dinner?” I wasn’t about to let my friends rain on my parade. I’d done something absolutely crazy, and I felt good about it. Who cared that I’d thought about Chase every day since, or that he was now in my dreams?

  “Do you want to go out or would you rather we ordered in?” Mallory gave Juliet another look.

  I knew what her question was really asking. “I’m not going to hide out in my room for the next four mo
nths. He’s the jerk who’s been sleeping around on me.”

  Mallory paled. “Of course. That’s not what I meant. I just didn’t know if you’d feel like going out.”

  I sat up. “Let’s go to Al’s.”

  Juliet gave me a ‘you’ve lost your mind’ look. “To eat? You want to eat at Al’s when you’re sober?”

  “You guys do serve pizza there.” The pizza place that Juliet worked at and Reed managed was notorious for its awful pizza but great beer. It was also a go-to hangout, and there was a good chance a bunch of Kappas (i.e. guys from Aaron’s frat) would be there.

  “Okay, I get what you’re doing.” Juliet stood up. “I know you want to show the Kappas you’re not afraid. That’s great. Absolutely great, but couldn’t we at least eat somewhere else first and then go out for beer?”

  “Yeah. That’s a great idea.” Mallory nodded enthusiastically. “We could even just grab something at the student center.”

  “Nope. We’re doing this.”

  “Let it be known that I’m only doing this because I love you.” Juliet zipped up a hoodie sweatshirt. January evenings in Charleston often dipped down into the forties.

  “If it’s good enough to serve to paying customers, surely you can handle eating a slice tonight.” I decided to forego a sweatshirt. My cable knit sweater would do the trick. If there was a chance I’d run into Aaron, I wasn’t going to do it looking frumpy. He needed a reminder of what he’d lost.

  The walk over to Al’s was short, but it felt longer than usual that night. A mix of nerves and the cold made every step seem difficult.

  “He might not even be there.” Juliet looped her arm through mine.

  I leaned into her side. I may have had a jerk ass for an ex-boyfriend, to use Juliet’s term, but I had awesome friends. “He finally stopped calling, so I’m guessing he got the hint.”

  “It was either that or the nut shot from Juliet.” Mallory looped her arm on my other side. “Reed had better be careful not to piss her off.”

  I smiled imagining Juliet’s ninja moves. “You guys should have heard the first few messages. He didn’t even try to deny it. Instead he tried to rationalize it.”

  “Rationalize it how? How could he possibly explain that?” Mallory scrunched up her face.

  “Oh, Aaron tried. First it was all her fault, she just wouldn’t stop pushing him. Then there was the ‘we have history’ excuse, and then finally the best one: it’s good you caught me. Now we can move on.”

  Juliet stopped short. “He didn’t. He actually said that?”

  “He did. He actually thought I’d want to stay with him.”

  “Arrogant prick.” Mallory started moving again which meant we all did.

  “I don’t want to see him, but I know it’s bound to happen. I still don’t know what I’m going to say to him.”

  Juliet held out her hand palm up. “Just tell him to go fuck himself.”

  “Juliet!”

  “What? It’s not like he’s going to be getting any action.”

  “He will if he wants.” I pulled my arms back and crossed them over my chest. I regretted my decision to leave my sweatshirt at home. “Plenty of girls like him.” I’d had to swallow down my annoyance at girls throwing themselves at him more than a few times.

  Mallory laughed, and I knew something was up.

  “What? What did you guys do?”

  “Who us?” Juliet gave me a sheepish look. “Nothing.”

  “Out with it.” I didn’t care what they did, but I still needed to know.

  “Well, you know how I’m on Panhel this semester?” Mallory asked.

  “Yes.” Over winter break, Mallory had accepted a spot on the Sorority Council.

  “I may have accidentally let it slip that he was a cheating bastard with a small dick, and the rest of the girls may have spread the word to their houses too.”

  “What?”

  “Yeah… he’s not getting sorority action any time soon at least. The combination of being unfaithful and having a small penis isn’t a good thing for a guy.”

  “But he doesn’t have a small—”

  “And you’re going to keep that detail to yourself.” Mallory hugged me from the side. “He deserves this.”

  “I just want him out of here. Can’t he graduate early?”

  “It’s going to be okay. You’ll show him whose turf this is and you’ll be fine.” Juliet took my hand. “Let’s go eat some really bad pizza and try to drown out the taste with beer.”

  “I love you, girls.”

  “Yeah, we love you too.” Juliet opened the door to the empty restaurant.

  “Hey, ladies.” Reed greeted us with a smile as we made our way over to him. He didn’t usually work the counter, but some of his staff must have still been home on break.

  “Hey, Reed.” I took in the tall, broad frame of Juliet’s boyfriend. He’d let his brown hair grow out a little since I’d last seen him.

  “How are you doing, Cara?” He smiled. It wasn’t a sympathetic smile. It was just a smile, and I appreciated it.

  “I’m doing pretty well thanks to these gals.” I did my best to smile back.

  “Anything I can get you girls?”

  “A large cheese pizza and a pitcher.” Juliet grimaced when she ordered.

  “You actually want pizza? Have you guys been drinking already?”

  “They’re doing this for me.” I rested a hand on the counter. “Just put the order up.”

  “Okay, if you say so.”

  We found a booth, and I slid in. Mallory sat next to me, probably leaving Juliet’s side open in case Reed decided to sit with us for a little while.

  I needed to make conversation that didn’t involve Aaron. “So, how’s Colt?”

  Mallory smiled. Bringing up her boyfriend always had that effect. “He’s good. He’s going to the movies with some of his friends tonight.”

  I felt a twinge of guilt. I had the feeling he was only with his friends because Mallory told him she had to be around for me. That was fine for a night, but it couldn’t continue for long. I refused to mess anything up for my friends and their boyfriends. I had to make them understand I didn’t expect them to change their life because of me. The funny thing was, I’d pushed both of them to start dating Kappas. I’d wanted us to all have boyfriends in the same house. We hadn’t even had a full semester that way.

  I sighed.

  “You okay?” Mallory asked.

  “Yeah, please don’t worry.”

  “Of course we’re going to worry.”

  The door jangled and my chest clenched. In theory, I wanted to face Aaron, but the thought of actually doing it terrified me.

  “It’s not him.” Juliet pulled a few napkins from the dispenser.

  “Okay, thanks.” I let out a sigh of relief.

  “Here you go.” Reed set down a pitcher and three plastic glasses on the table. One of the best parts of going to Al’s was that we never had to worry about being carded. We also didn’t usually have to worry about paying for the beer. He bent down and kissed Juliet on the cheek. “I’ll go check on the pizza.”

  Juliet poured each of us a cup before raising her glass in a toast. “To our amazing and resilient friend, Cara. May she meet Mr. Right soon.”

  I smiled, sipping the drink. I appreciated the sentiment, but I wasn’t interested in finding Mr. Right. I had no interest in getting burned ever again. I had another fleeting thought of Chase. The best part of that hookup was that it would always stay perfect. Even if he’d slept with another girl ten minutes later, I’d never know. I could pretend he was as perfect as I wanted him to be, and that I was as perfect and gorgeous as he thought I was.

  ***

  Aaron never showed up at Al’s that night. As hyped up as I was about facing him, I couldn’t deny some serious relief at avoiding the confrontation. Saying I was over what he did was easier when I didn’t have to worry about seeing his face.

  “Have you had enough crappy pizza yet?�
�� Reed asked. He’d come to sit with us once a few of the other employees showed up at work.

  I’d stopped at half a slice. I’d have to scrounge up a snack before bed. “Yeah, I’m probably ready to head home soon.” I knew falling asleep easily was out of the question, but I needed to try. I hadn’t slept in my own bed at school more than a handful of times that year.

  “All right, want to walk us home?” Juliet leaned into Reed.

  “Oh, you girls don’t have to stay at the house.” I knew they’d prefer to stay with their boyfriends. I finished off my first cup of beer.

  “We don’t have to, but we want to.” Mallory squeezed my hand. Her boyfriend, a freshman, had taken over a vacant room at the Kappa house. I was pretty sure the only reason he had traded his dorm for the frat house was so he could have Mallory stay over with him.

  Reed put an arm around Juliet. “I’m willing to give Juliet up for a while since it’s for a good cause.”

  “But it’s not a good cause.” I nudged Malloy so she’d let me get up. “I want to be alone tonight anyway.”

  Mallory blocked my exit. “You stayed back at the house last semester when I needed you.”

  “This is different. I want to be alone.”

  “No, you don’t.”

  “I do. Please, guys.” I hoped they heard the desperation in my voice. Seeing them there would just remind me that they weren’t with their boyfriends—their caring boyfriends who weren’t screwing their ex’s.

  “Please.”

  “At least let me walk you home.” Reed’s eyes were so kind. I could tell how much he hated the awkward situation he was in. Being stuck between your best friend and your girlfriend’s best friend couldn’t be fun.

  “Fine, if you don’t mind.”

  “Of course he doesn’t mind,” Juliet quickly answered. “And I’ll be back before class tomorrow so we can walk together.”

  “What do I have to do to prove to you guys that I’m okay?”

  “Stop pretending to be.” Mallory put a hand on my arm. “You’re allowed to be upset. You’re supposed to be upset.”