Straight to Heaven

by Michelle Scott

  “And those clubs she’s using are rentals,” Babs pointed out.

  “Well, isn’t that special,” Leo said. He’d been bragging about his own clubs nonstop, constantly pestering me to guess how much they cost.

  When we took the cart to the next hole, Leo refused to talk to me. The caddy who was riding on the back leaned close to me and whispered, “From the way you’re messing up your job, I’m thinking you’ve decided to start working for us.”

  Shocked, I turned around to face the kid who had been lugging my clubs for the past three holes. “I beg your pardon?”

  He treated me to an impertinent smile. He looked to be about sixteen. He had a daub of zinc oxide on his nose, and a smattering of acne on his cheeks. When he took off his sunglasses, I saw that his mocking eyes were brilliantly blue.

  Another angel. Wonderful. “Let me guess. You’re here to screw this up for me,” I whispered, furious.

  The caddy shrugged. “You’re doing a pretty good job of screwing this up yourself.”

  “I’ve got it covered,” I said, turning around.

  “If you say so.”

  Deciding the angel was right – I really was messing up my assignment – I held back on the next hole, making sure to drop my right arm so that the ball hooked into the woods alongside the fairway.

  “I knew that your beginner’s luck would run out,” Leo gloated.

  We were only on the sixth hole, but I was ready to go home. The new golf shoes pinched worse than my sandals had, and I was bored stiff. I wanted to be back at my pool, fifty pages deep in a novel, not here with Leo. It was time to get down to seducing.

  “Would you please help me find my ball?” I sent him a high-powered charge of my succubus’s allure.

  “Of course.” He smiled like he’d been saving the last, little blue pill in the bottle just for me.

  The moment we were out of sight of the others, I said, “Have you golfed for this charity before?”

  “Yes.” He was only inches behind me.

  “It’s a great cause, isn’t it? Cancer research…”

  Leo grabbed my butt.

  My stomach quivered with revulsion, but I hung onto my smile. I sidestepped out of his reach. “The outing must raise a lot of money for the cause.” My demon sensed a slight change in Leo’s demeanor, so I pressed on. “How much do you think it will bring in? Ten thousand? Twenty?”

  “Two-hundred fifty.”

  “Thousand?” I whistled. “That’s an impressive amount of money.”

  Leo looked away. His jaw muscle twitched. “Like you said. It’s for a good cause.”

  “Are you sure?” As much as I hated to, I moved in closer to give him the full effect of my charm. “When you think about it, isn’t cancer research just a big scam? I mean, with all the money we pump into these charities’ coffers, you’d think they would have made some headway on the disease.”

  I couldn’t read the thoughts churning in Leo’s head, but one thing I did know for sure: I was moments away from a successful temptation. “Do they really need to take your money, too? Don’t you need it more?”

  When I stepped closer towards him, something small and round pressed under my foot. The golf ball! I automatically looked down to see it, and when I looked back up, I found myself being kissed by a man who was as old as my father.

  Taking advantage of my surprise, Leo backed me up against a tree and pinned me there while forcing my teeth apart with his tongue. One hand found its way to my breasts while the other traveled up my skirt. He was old, but he was agile. It took every ounce of demon control I had to not get sick all over my new, white shoes.

  I put my hands on his chest and pushed him back. “Hold on there, cowboy,” I told him. “We’ve still got a game to win.” I attempted to move away from the tree, but he moved as well, blocking my exit.

  “I don’t care about the game,” he said, once more grabbing for my breast.

  Furious, I shoved him again, this time so hard that he took a step backwards. It only threw him off for a second and before I could get away, he leaned against me and put a hand around my throat. “You’ve been teasing me all morning,” he said. “I think it’s time for you to shut up and put out.”

  How could things go so wrong so fast?! And where the hell was all his anger coming from? Desperate, I searched for a doorway to Hell but saw nothing. Damn! I was trapped.

  I needed to get ahold of the situation and fast. “It’s okay,” I said, sending out my allure to calm him down. “Really, Leo. Everything is fine.”

  Unfortunately, instead of calming him down, the demon’s energy revved him up until his eyes blazed. “Do not tell me it’s okay!”

  I knew I mustn’t panic, yet it was impossible not to. I grabbed his wrist to break his hold, but he was too strong. I cried to my succubus for help, and she rewarded me with a surge of energy. With a grunt, I wrestled free. I raised my knee, ready to deliver a blow to the crotch, but Leo surprised me by stepping away and grabbing the golf club he’d been holding under his arm. He jerked the club over his head, ready to swing it at my face, and I flung my arms up to protect myself.

  “Aren’t you two ever coming out of the woods?” the caddy called from the edge of the fairway.

  For a few heartbeats, I thought Leo was still going to swing. Then he slowly dropped his club and stalked away. Shaken, I closed my eyes and pressed my hands to my heart which was galloping in my chest.

  The angel walked over to me. “Having fun yet?”

  “No, I am not having fun.” I straightened my skirt and brushed the flakes of tree trunk from my shoulders. Thanks to Leo, my blouse now had a rip under the sleeve. “Remind me why you’re here again?”

  “You mean besides saving you from being raped?” He winked. “I’ve got a counteroffer for you.”

  “Counteroffer?”

  “Yes,” he said. “Harmony told me about what happened at the bowling alley.” He shook his head. “You made it into Heaven. That’s amazing!”

  “Yeah, and?”

  “No demon ever goes into Heaven and survives the trip.”

  So I was one of a kind. Nice to know. Still, the information wasn’t helping me to tempt Leo. Or Craig. “I’m kind of busy right now. Can we do this later?”

  “This is simple. If you back off from Craig, I’ll tell you why you can get into Heaven.”

  I picked up my golf ball and headed towards the green. “I don’t care why I can get in.”

  “But it could lead to a way for you to protect your daughter from Helen.”

  I paused. Maybe it would be good to know why I could pass through the pearly gates. Then again, I didn’t need Heaven’s help to save my daughter. Once I tempted Craig, Grace would be free. “How about this instead. If you stay away from Craig, I won’t go into Heaven anymore.”

  “Sorry. No can do.”

  It figured. Before I left the gloomy woods and returned to the overly bright fairway, I told the angel, “If you won’t stay away from Craig, then at least keep away from me.”

  He did. But then I was forced to carry my own clubs for the next ten holes.

  Five hours later, I left the golf course exhausted, sweaty, and completely frustrated. Despite my repeated attempts to re-seduce Leo, he’d walled himself off from my charms. The worst part was that, when he did write the check, I saw that it was only for thirty dollars. Leo was not only a braggart, a letch, and a poor loser, he was also a cheapskate.

  Before going home, I decided to stop and explain to Mr. Clerk why I’d failed yet another assignment. Hopefully, if I went to him first, he would plead my case to Miss Spry.

  Mr. Clerk was at his desk. When he saw me, he made a face. “You look terrible.”

  “Eighteen holes of golf will do that to a person.” I wearily sank down on the edge of his desk.

  “You played eighteen holes of golf. Wearing that?”

  My beautiful, silk top had wrinkled and was stained dark under the armpits. The skirt was streaked with what l
ooked to be pine sap. Even though I’d only worn my sandals a short time, the straps had bit into my ankles, drawing blood. I couldn’t bear to think about the condition of my hair and makeup. “I admit it wasn’t the best choice,” I said, “but it was effective. Or nearly so. In the end, I couldn’t quite tempt him.”

  “Tempt who?”

  “Leo.” When he rubbed his chin and frowned, I added, “You know. Dark tan. Silver hair?”

  Mr. Clerk blinked uncertainly. “Oh, yes. Of course.” He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “It’s been a very long day.”

  “Will Miss Spry be upset about it? I mean, that’s three fails in three days.”

  He nervously shifted a few things on his desk. “No, I’m sure she won’t. Don’t worry.”

  Something about his behavior put me on alert. I didn’t like how he refused to meet my eyes. Before I could question him, however, William burst into the room. His cheeks were slightly sunburned, as if he’d spent most of the day outside, and he smelled of wood smoke. “Patrick, it didn’t work. The minute I got close to my client, I was interrupted…” When William saw me, he stopped speaking. His eyes widened. “Dear hell, you look terrible.” He glanced at my feet. “I thought I told you to wear comfortable shoes.”

  “I remember,” I said dryly.

  “Then why did you wear those? Here, sit down. Patrick, give Lil your seat. She looks ready to fall over.”

  Mr. Clerk groused, but offered up his chair and then, at William’s urging, fetched me a cold bottle of water. “You have him well trained,” I said. I gratefully accepted the water and drank some of it.

  “Patrick knows how to keep me happy,” William said. Mr. Clerk flushed and smiled. So much for his claim that he was no longer in love.

  “Now, about that appointment I had today,” William continued. “I need more information about my target. Anything at all.”

  “Take a number, William,” I said. “I was here first.” I glared at Mr. Clerk. “First off, I want to know why things got so weird today. My client nearly split my skull with a golf club.”

  Mr. Clerk paled. “Oh, dear!”

  William’s eyebrows shot up. “Are you all right?! Did he hurt you?”

  “No, he didn’t hurt me, but he came unhinged. The more I tried to use my succubus on him, the more upset he got.”

  Mr. Clerk frowned. “Some humans react badly to our demons. William has had lovers pull guns on him before.”

  “And once a knife,” William added.

  Mr. Clerk nodded. “Then there was the woman who tried to run you down in her car.”

  With growing horror, I looked from William to Mr. Clerk and back again. “Are you kidding me?”

  “Human nature is unpredictable,” Mr. Clerk said. “Sometimes, things get ugly no matter how much I plan ahead.”

  “I know you do your best,” William admitted, “but for Lilith’s sake, please be more careful next time.” He put his hand on my shoulder.

  So he did worry about me! “Thank you, William.” I squeezed his hand gratefully. “And Mr. Clerk, I must have another appointment with Craig as soon as possible!”

  William and Mr. Clerk exchanged a look. “I’m sure Patrick is working as hard as he can,” William said.

  “I could work even harder if the two of you left me alone,” Mr. Clerk said.

  William and I grudgingly returned to the hallway, and Mr. Clerk slammed the door behind us. “I get the feeling he doesn’t want to be bothered,” I said.

  “And after everything I’ve done for him,” William said.

  “What did you do?” I asked.

  “It obviously doesn’t matter now,” he said. “When Patrick is under pressure, his halo gets a bit tarnished.”

  That phrase triggered a memory from the bowling alley. “Did you know that Mr. Clerk used to hang out with the angels?”

  William laughed. “Really?”

  “Yes. I saw a guardian angel yesterday, and she said that he left Heaven to get the designer clothes in Hell. Why would she say that?”

  “I have no idea.” William put his arm around my waist and guided me away from Mr. Clerk’s door. “When you’ve been around as long as Patrick, you’re bound to have some interesting history.”

  “What about you?” I asked. “Any interesting history?”

  “Some things are better left unsaid.”

  My cell buzzed again, and I was pretty sure it was Ari. All day, she’d been texting me updates about her stomach distress – I’m hungry. Is it okay 2 eat now? The cold pizza made me not feel good. Do u think I can drink Coke? Right now, her message said: My head hurts. I wondered where the hell Tanya was. If ever there was a time to play Mommy Dearest, it was now.

  “Is everything all right?” William asked. “You look worried.”

  “It’s my niece, Ariel.”

  He frowned. “Is she the fat one or the one who looks like a little serial killer?”

  I bristled at the way he described the girls, but said, “Little serial killer.”

  “Let me guess. She’s been arrested for armed robbery?”

  “Not funny, William.” I leaned against the wall and rubbed my temples. After the eighteen holes of golf, the failed assignment, and the scare with Leo, I was drained. “Ari’s living with her mom, now, but she keeps texting me that she isn’t feeling well. If I knew where she lived, I’d slip in and make sure she’s all right.”

  “I would have thought you’d be happy to get rid of her,” William said.

  “No, I’m very attached,” I said, purposely avoiding the L-word.

  He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. His eyes were distant. “Children are like that. They can worm their way into your heart more quickly than you would ever think possible.”

  Hearing this shocked me. Not for a moment had I thought of William as a man who liked kids. Seeing my surprise, he laughed bitterly. “Yes, I’m speaking from experience. It’s a part of my interesting history.”

  “You had children?”

  “A son. He lived only a few hours. I never even had a chance to hold him.” He looked at his hands. “And when he died, he took his mother with him.”

  William with a wife and baby? It was hard to believe. Although William knew almost everything about my life story, he was reluctant to talk about his own. I’d thought that maybe his agreement with the Devil had been born of spite, but seeing his grief-stricken expression, I wondered if something else was in play.

  “Can you ever get them back?” I asked. “Or visit them?” We demons had limited access to the otherworld, and it was possible to glimpse our loved ones from time to time.

  His expression clouded even more. “As much as I want to, I can’t.”

  “You miss her.”

  “It’s more than that. I…” He ran his fingers through his hair.

  I touched his arm. “Tell me.”

  He sighed miserably. “I hurt her. Very badly. And I never got the chance to tell her how sorry I was. She was a sweet-tempered, naive young woman who deserved far better than me. I know she’s in Heaven – there’s no other place she could be – and I know she’s probably forgiven me, but I long to hear her say it. To hold my son and tell my wife I loved her – I’d give anything to make that happen.”

  My heart clenched. I couldn’t imagine living a hundred years with such a deep regret. I tried to take him in my arms and comfort him, but he wouldn’t let me. Instead, he covered up his sorrow by firing up the high-gloss luster of his incubus. “How about if I help you find your little serial killer?” he asked.

  “Really?”

  “Absolutely.” He took my hand and led me further down the hall. “Every time your demon connects with someone, that person leaves an impression on it.”

  “When you say ‘connect’ you mean…”

  “Form a relationship with,” he said. “No matter how brief. Every victim you tempt, every person you have emotional ties with, all of them leave a mark on the demon. Any time you want to find one of
those people, you only need to ask her.”

  “So she’s like a hunting dog?”

  He laughed. “More like a hunting bitch. Now this is what you need to do…”

  Feeling silly, I followed his directions. I closed my eyes and pictured Ariel in as much detail as I could. Then I ordered my succubus to find her. In less than a minute, I knew right where my niece was. I hurried down the hallway, made a turn, and continued on until I had the right door.

  I opened it and looked through. Ari was sitting on a sagging couch while MTV played on a tiny television. Surrounding her were nearly a dozen open bags of potato chips, cheese puffs, M&Ms, and other assorted snacks. That explained the stomachache. She held Tommy’s spacer between her thumb and forefinger and squinted through it with one eye.

  “Thank you William,” I said. “You have no idea how much better I feel now.”

  “And you have no idea how much better I feel at seeing you happy.” He moved closer and touched my cheek, giving me another whiff of wood smoke. “I’m sorry about what happened to you on the golf course.”

  “It’s been a rough day,” I agreed, “but knowing that Ari is okay makes it much better.” I smiled as she slipped the spacer on each one of her fingers. She missed Tommy as much as I did.

  William watched me carefully. “That expression on your face when you look at your niece. That’s love. You have no idea how lucky you are to have that.”

  The haunted look in his eyes bespoke worlds of regret. I reached for his hand, but he moved away. “I’m sorry about your family,” I said.

  He set his jaw. “Don’t be.”

  My aching legs told me it was time to leave, but I stayed a moment longer. In a way, it pained me to see that my niece was getting along so well. I’d almost hoped to find a reason to bring her back home with me. “I miss you Ari,” I said.

  To my amazement, Ari looked straight at me, her eyes wide.

  “Did she hear me?” I said, stunned.

  He looked interested, but not overly surprised. “Some humans have a sensitivity to the otherworld.”

  Ari stared in our direction a moment longer, then stretched back on the couch and aimlessly flipped through the channels on the TV.