by Gary Ruffin
“Julie? Jill? Joy?” I asked.
“Coop! Hi! It’s me, Joy! How are you? When are you bringin’ Cherry out here? We’ve been watchin’ you on TV all day and night! Your hair looks so good! We can’t believe you finally got a decent haircut. Are y’all comin’ over tonight?”
Laughing at her excitement, I said, “No, darlin’, we’re not comin’ over tonight. And thanks. I do look more respectable, don’t I? Listen, sweetie, is your old man there? I need to talk to him as soon as possible.”
“Aw, c’mon, can’t y’all come over for just a little while? Just for a little while, please-please-please?”
“No, not tonight, but we’ll try and get out there soon, okay?”
She said in her disappointed voice, “Okay, I guess. I’ll get Daddy. And Coop?”
“Yes, sweetie?”
“I know that you and Daddy are gonna catch that psycho killer before he can get to Cherry. All my friends are scared for her, but not me. I told them that she has my dad and Coop with her, and that’s all she needs.”
I said, “Thanks, Joy. That means a lot to me. And you’re right, we’ll get the killer.”
“I know y’all will. And another thing. Your hair really does look great. Lemme get Daddy for you. Come as soon as you can, okay?”
“I promise.”
Neal came on the line, “I thought it was you when I heard the squeals of teenage delight. What’s up?”
“Long story short, Cherry and I are headin’ outta town tomorrow, and I was wonderin’ if I could use the Lexus. You can drive the Bentley while we’re gone and feel like a big shot. Whatta ya say?”
“I say fine. Cherry’s assistant called me just a few minutes ago and filled me in. I thought you might wanna change cars. I’ll probably just park the Bentley back at the Ritz so they don’t come to me askin’ about y’all. What else do you need?”
I said, “I have it all figured out. Here’s the deal.”
We talked for a few minutes about my plan, and a moment after I hung up the phone, Cherry called from the bedroom, “Will wants to know what time he needs to make me disappear tomorrow.”
“Tell him ten o’clock.”
“Righty-o.”
As I waited for her to come out of the bedroom, I looked at the room-service menu, and decided it was time for a change. Delivery pizza, or Chinese?
Pizza.
Cherry came out a minute later, and asked, “What shall we do this evening?”
“I was thinking pizza and TV in the suite. Is that okay by you?”
She said, “That’s sounds divine, Cooper. Nothing would please me more right now. What do you fancy on your pizza?”
“Well, I know you’ll probably hate this combination—all my officers do, they never let me order it—but I would really like mushrooms and anchovies. Does that disgust you like it does everyone else?”
She smiled, and said, “You’ve been talking with Sally, haven’t you?”
Puzzled, I said, “Actually, no. What does Sally have to do with it?”
“You swear you haven’t spoken with her?”
“I swear.”
She said, “Well, this settles it. I’m the only person I know who ever asks for anchovies. I absolutely adore anchovies. It’s quite obvious: you and I were meant to be, Cooper. Might as well give in now, and be done with it.”
“Can I eat my pizza first?”
Giggling, she said, “Yes, you may, but then it’s off to the church immediately after.”
“Deal,” I said.
“And get some beer, too, will you?”
“Yes, ma’am. Any special brand? Light? Dark?”
“Get whatever you like. I’m sure I’ll love it too.”
“Your wish, et cetera.”
I looked through the brochures Sally had brought the morning we met, and found a nearby pizzeria that would deliver. Forty-five minutes later, Cherry and I were sitting next to each other on the sofa chowing down on a giant pizza, swilling beer, and watching The Pink Panther. It was about as good as it gets. I’m a huge Peter Sellers fan, and it turned out she was, too.
I was so comfortable with Cherry that it made me uncomfortable. Penny and I have been together for about nine years, off and on, and I do mean off and on. She keeps a journal, and did the math last year, and found that we’ve been together almost exactly as much as we’ve been apart. I’ve never been unfaithful to Penny while we’re together as a couple, but when we’ve been apart, I’ve strayed a few times. With the pizza, and the beer, and the laughing, and the redheaded movie star sitting next to me, straying had never looked so good before.
I needed to call Penny.
Cherry must be a psychic as well as an international beauty. The moment I thought of calling Penny, she said, “I’ll wager you and your lady friend spend evenings like this together quite often.”
I just stared and said, “I’m sorry, what?” not wanting her to know that she was reading me like a script.
“I was just saying—never mind, it was nothing, really. Did you have enough to eat?”
“I had way too much to eat. And drink.”
She inspected her fingernails, and asked, “Does Penny like anchovies?”
“No. As a matter of fact, she despises them.”
“Hmmm. Then I guess we shall have to stay away from pizza while we’re in Gulf Front, yeah?”
“Yeah. That might be best,” I said. After what felt like an awkward moment, I said, “Lemme tell you what I have in mind regarding our great escape.”
“Oh, please do, I’m dying to hear your devious plan.”
For the next five minutes, I filled her in, and Cherry listened and clapped her hands when I was finished.
“Bravo, Cooper,” she said. “I love an adventure, and I’m so glad that you’re allowing me to impose on you this way. I promise to be a good girl, and behave like a lady the whole time we’re there. I’m so excited, I shall probably be up all night!”
I looked at my watch: 11:52. “Yikes,” I said. “We better hit the sack. Tomorrow’s a bigger-than-usual day.”
“Awww, Cooper,” she whined. “Can’t we stay up for a little while longer? There’s another Peter Sellers movie on. See? Revenge of the Pink Panther.” She turned those big green eyes on me, and resistance was out of the question. I couldn’t resist her and Chief Inspector Clouseau of the Sûreté.
“Okay, we can watch a little bit longer, but then it’s straight to bed, and no more whining, young lady.”
“Yay! You’re the best!” she said, and leaned over and kissed my cheek.
I really needed to call Penny.
30
No wonder so many people sought fame! It was so energizing, so exhilarating! Even being famous in an anonymous way was nothing short of fantastic. Watching the news day and night and knowing that you were the star was something you had to experience, it couldn’t be explained.
So much energy was available to you when you were doing that which must be done! That which was demanded from the higher power! The mind worked with such ease, driven by unseen powerful forces that fed you when you were most hungry for answers. The only requirement was to ask the forces for help, and then things happened almost on their own. Doors opened, paths became clear of obstacles, and moves were made as on a giant chessboard.
This next move was truly inspired, and when it got out that the last murder had happened so close to Cherry, right in her hotel, it would put the media in a frenzy yet again!
But there was no time for self-congratulation or to rest on laurels. The time had come to attack even closer to home, and this assault would no doubt be the crowning achievement in the Battle so far. No one would see this move coming, not in a million years!
Everything must be in place; there would be no room for slipups. This would be more difficult to pull off than the others, but what really good thing ever came easy? The satisfaction afterward would be deep and long lasting. Maybe then a break would be in order; let the heat die dow
n for a day or two—maybe even a week—then strike back harder and closer still!
But for now, what a beautiful spring night to go to work. The moon still fat and bright, even though no longer quite full. A breeze cooling down the warm evening; as midnight arrived, the sweet smell of honeysuckle in the air. Lightness around the heart of the one chosen to do the most important task of them all, the weight of the responsibility lifting as the action began. The silence on the street as everyone nestled in for the night, snug in his or her bed and safe from sacrifice.
Well, almost everyone.
Okay, enough savoring the moment: time to settle down and get to work. Make sure everything was in the car and head out for the hunt.
Gas? Check. Dark suit and mask? Check. Appropriate shoes? Check. Duct tape? Check. New toy, the thing that will be the most fun yet? Double check.
Start your engines!
The midnight hour, the moon as companion, the feeling of power as the car roared to—shit!
Almost forgot the knife.
31
PENNY WAS IN A FOUL MOOD WHEN SHE WOKE UP. SHE HAD TOSSED AND turned half the night, and was in the middle of an unpleasant dream when her alarm clock sounded.
All the unpleasantness of yesterday was made worse by the fact that Coop still hadn’t called. What possible excuse could he have? Were all his fingers broken? Had he been kidnapped and taken to a land where no phones existed? He’d better hope that his excuse was good enough to appease her; otherwise, he was going to be looking for a new girlfriend when he finally did call.
The stupid dumbass.
She showered, dressed, and headed to Matthews Cafeteria for breakfast. Penny only ate in the restaurant four or five times a month, as opposed to Coop, who ate there every day he was on duty. She moved through the line, speaking only to order biscuits and eggs with coffee. Her mood kept everyone at arm’s length without her having to say a word. Anybody who knew her was familiar with her “I hate Coop’’ expression, and no one said anything more than good morning to her as she ate at a table by the front window alone.
Fueled by the food and coffee, her mood lightened and she bid everyone a cheery farewell: “Okay, everybody, y’all can relax now. Chief Cooper is safe for at least one more day.”
This got her a rousing cheer from the patrons, and she smiled broadly as she left.
One of the town mutts came up to Penny as she opened the door to her borrowed patrol car, and she petted his head for a moment before getting in the car and heading to the office. Once there, she spent the first ten minutes apologizing again to Doreen for her actions the day before, then sat in Coop’s chair behind his desk, going over the monthly reports. She drank two more cups of coffee as she worked, and finished the reports a minute before Doreen called out, “Penny, line one. It’s Blanche.”
Blanche was calling from O’Kelly’s, the smaller of the two grocery stores in Gulf Front. Penny did all her shopping there, since it was closest to her cottage. Blanche had worked the only cash register for as long as anyone could remember, and was the main source of gossip in town. Penny smiled to herself as she picked up, knowing it must be pretty juicy if Blanche felt the need to call her at the office.
“Hey lady,” Penny said. “What’s new?”
Blanche replied, “I think this is somethin’ you need to see for yourself. It just come in a few minutes ago.”
Penny looked at her watch: 9:04. She was surprised that she’d been working on the reports for almost an hour. She asked Blanche, “What’s so important that I hafta come over there and see it? Can’t you just tell me what it is?”
“Honey, you need to see this for yourself. Cain’t choo take a minute and come on over?”
Penny sighed and said, “Okay, but you’re bein’ mighty mysterious about this. I’ll be there in a minute.”
They hung up, and Penny told Doreen where she was going as she headed out. This had better be good, she thought as she started the engine and drove to O’Kelly’s.
Blanche met her as she walked into the store, her hands behind her back, hiding something.
Penny chuckled, and said, “All right, you’re under arrest for disturbin’ my peace. Show me whatever it is you’ve got back there, and no sudden movements.”
Blanche brought her arms forward, and handed Penny one of the tabloid papers that were on sale in the market.
Penny stared at the cover in disbelief.
Cherry Page and Coop were in living color on the front page, Coop in a tuxedo, Cherry in a formal gown, their lips locked in a kiss. Another, smaller picture below showed them in the same attire, laughing as if they were sharing some secret joke.
The headline blared, in large yellow print: BRITISH BOMBSHELL’S BRAND-NEW BODYGUARD BOYFRIEND. Below the headline another, less significant line read, “Has This Cherry Been Picked?”
Penny opened the rag to the article about Coop and Cherry, and read the first line: “Who is the hunky guy who has been spotted around Atlanta closerthanthis with the fabulous Cherry Page?”
That was all Penny needed to read, and she rolled it up and gripped it in her right hand like a nightstick.
Blanche said, “You know, these so-called magazines come out Wednesday mornin’, and they deliver ’em right as we’re openin’ the store. When I seen it, well, I knew I had to call you and show it to ya before it got around town. You know how people are: they see a picture, and go off the deep end. But, ya gotta admit, it is quite a picture.” She went and got another copy, pointed at the cover, and asked, “Are you believin’ that? I liked to have died when I seen it!”
Penny tried to smile, and said, “Oh, come on now, Blanche, you know these rags make up stuff like this all the time. I’m sure there’s a perfectly innocent explanation for this photo. This coulda been taken with a dozen people around. Besides, Coop would never cheat on me. He’s as loyal as they come.”
Blanche replied, “He’s as loyal as men come, Penny. That’s the problem.”
At first I didn’t know where I was, then I realized that Cherry and I had fallen asleep on the sofa watching the movie. I was still in a sitting position, and she had curled up on the sofa, her head in my lap. I looked at my watch, saw that it was 2:51 A.M., and slowly moved out from under Cherry, placing her head gently on the sofa cushion.
I turned off the TV, and quietly called the front desk from Cherry’s room to cancel the wakeup call since we would be sleeping late. Then I went back and picked her up, brought her to her bed, and placed her on top of the covers.
I debated for a full minute whether or not I should undress her, and decided to let sleeping movie stars lie. Her shoes were already off, so I pulled the covers from the other side of the bed over her, wrapping her like a calzone. I yawned deeply and walked back to my room, so tired that I didn’t bother to undress; I just took off my shoes and got into bed, still somewhat woozy from the beer and pizza. Sleep came quickly and heavily.
When I woke up again, I found that Cherry had climbed into bed with me during the night, and was sleeping with her back to my front, dressed only in her legendary bra and panties. No pajamas after a night of beer, I guessed. I was spooning her, my arm across her breasts, and she was holding my hand in hers. It was a good thing that I still had my clothes on, or something might have happened during the night.
Or right then.
Anyway, I did the last thing in the world that I wanted to do at that moment: I removed my hand from hers, and withdrew my arm. Another chance squandered, I thought, and smiled again at the notion of all the guys who would’ve loved to be in my position. Especially that position.
She stirred as I moved, and made a small moaning sound, but didn’t wake up. I got my watch from the windowsill where I kept it, and saw that it was 9:22. We had slept through the night, and obviously we’d both needed it. In fact, I wanted to turn over and catch a few more winks but knew we should be up and at ’em, so I made a conscious effort to stay awake.
About ten minutes later, Cherry stretc
hed lazily and said, “I hope you took advantage of me last night. I promise I won’t tell, if you won’t.”
My eyes still closed, I said, “I did unspeakable things to you. Things I would be arrested for in twenty-nine states. Terrible things that we shall never speak of again.”
“I knew you couldn’t resist me forever, Cooper,” she said, still stretching. “Was I any good?”
“A gentleman never tells.”
She yawned, and asked, “What does that have to do with the likes of you?”
I chuckled, and said, “You’re pretty funny for a sex symbol. Now, get out of my bed and go get dressed. We hafta order breakfast and get Will in here. It’s time to implement my most devious of plans.”
Yawning wider, she asked, “Can’t we lie here for another hour or two? Or three? We have all day to be devious. What say we be sleepious?”
“No, ma’am, we need to get up and get going. I wanna be in Gulf before dark. But, if you wanna just lay around here and—”
Excited, she said, “I forgot! Right, I’m ready to go, sir! Won’t take a mo’ to get my bag packed!”
With that, she jumped from the bed and ran to her room, leaving me with an eyeful of her celebrated rump.
I didn’t need to call Penny. I needed to call a psychiatrist.
When I heard the shower running, I got up and called down for breakfast. They informed me that Sally had already taken care of it, and that it would be delivered at ten on the button. That gave me twenty minutes to shower, dress, and get Cherry to call Will and tell him to come over at ten thirty, instead of ten. It also gave me plenty of time to call Neal, which I did. Everything was in order, and all was right with the world.
Except for that whole serial killer deal.
32
PENNY THOUGHT SERIOUSLY FOR A MOMENT ABOUT BUYING UP ALL THE copies of the tabloid rag, but knew it was hopeless. The news would be all over town in no time, no matter what she did. So, she smiled at Blanche and told her halfheartedly that everything would work out fine, and headed back to the office.