“I... wasn’t sure you’d feel this way.” Dorian, clearly relieved, caught one of her wrists in his hand and pulled her hand to his lips, placing a kiss into her palm.
“What?” A frown marring those perfect lips, Adele pulled her hand from Dorian’s grasp. “You didn’t think I’d be happy for you? Why?”
Dorian and I exchanged a glance.
“Because I have to leave.” He said slowly, as though just fully realizing it himself. “The tour will take about two weeks.”
Adele smirked, then leaned forward to plant a big, deep kiss on my lips. My hands found her hips, but when I tried to tug her down to me, she resisted.
“You think Mal and I won’t be able to survive you being gone for two weeks?”
I started a bit at her words, because they sounded like a taunt... like, leave us, and we’ll be just fine without you. But then I realized that that wasn’t what she meant at all.
She was trying to give Dorian a clear conscience, telling him that we would still be here waiting when he got back.
A clear conscience... Emma flashed through my mind, and I was suddenly very uncomfortable. I wanted to tell them that my ex-girlfriend was now suddenly my study buddy for the next four months, but I somehow couldn’t bring out the words.
I would tell them. I would. But now was not the time.
“I just want you to understand that I’m coming back.” Dorian all but growled the words, reaching out and catching the hem of Adele’s shirt in his hands and yanking her to him.
I just want you to understand that I’m coming back.
Wow. I hadn’t really thought of that. But... wow.
If things went the way the band wanted them to, then yeah, his life might change forever. And relationships didn’t always survive change.
Needing the connection, I reached out to them, splaying my hand over Adele’s hip.
Adele looked from Dorian to me, then back to Dorian, her irritation clear. Suddenly yanking away from us both, she faced away, then without warning, shed her T-shirt and sports bra.
I hissed out a breath when she pulled her long, strawberry blonde hair over her shoulder, leaving her beautiful back entirely bare.
“Remember when I told you about these tattoos?”
I focused in on the flock of ravens that would forever fly across her creamy skin. Of course I remembered. She got them after she was attacked—an attack I would always feel guilt over. To her, they symbolized new beginnings.
She spun, covering her breasts with her hands, her hair curtaining her face. Those big blue eyes of hers were fierce.
“A rebirth, remember? I’m still working through my shit, but I’m not broken, okay? And I wouldn’t be with either of you if I thought I couldn’t handle the issues that pop up in a relationship.”
Her glare landed on first Dorian, and then on me, and the look in her eyes told me that she was pissed off. Which was a bit of an overreaction for her.
I was smart enough to not ask if it was her time of the month.
“Adele—” I started at the same time that Dorian said “pet.”
She held out her hand to stop us as we both reached for her, shaking her head and backing away.
To my absolute horror, tears filled her eyes.
“Stop. What’s going on?” Dorian moved for her, and she retreated some more. This wasn’t normal. Adele wasn’t prone to wild fits of emotion, nor was she irrational.
She swallowed thickly, blinking back tears, her expression fierce. “I just... I just had a bad day, okay? I’m overreacting. And I’m not upset about you leaving, Dorian. I’m not. I just... I don’t want to be treated like that broken girl that I was before I met you, because that’s not who I want to be anymore.”
“Oh, babe.” Ignoring her protests, I crossed the room in quick strides, gathering her in my arms, guilt wracking every movement. “It’s okay. Just let it out.”
She relaxed into the hug while I stared over her head at Dorian, who looked completely stricken. But she quickly pulled away again.
“I just—I just need some time alone, okay?” It was a testament to how crazy I was about this girl that I was more concerned with discerning every nuance of her expression than in ogling her bare breasts. “I’m going to go take a shower.”
And then she was gone, leaving Dorian and I blinking at each other like idiots.
“That went well.” Dorian raked a hand through his hair and swore.
“She’s not upset at you.” Removing my glasses, I pinched the bridge of my nose. I hated seeing that look on D’s face—he should have been celebrating. “Look, just let it die down a bit. Then we’ll talk to her.”
“Yeah.” Dorian’s Aussie accent always thickened when he was upset, and it was out in full force right now. “What do you think about me going, mate? Is this the right choice?”
I was silent for a long moment, then answered carefully. “You’ll regret it forever if you don’t go. And you know Adele wants you to follow your dream?”
“Yeah?” I barely blinked, and then Dorian was in my face. “And what about you, mate? Will you be happy I’m gone?”
My heart thudded painfully in my chest. I was aware, hyper aware, of way too many things that I shouldn’t have been.
No, I won’t be happy.
But did I say this? No. Instead I heaved out a sigh of frustration and moved away, getting Dorian the hell out of my personal space.
I didn’t want to bring Dorian down further when he should have been flying, so I didn’t tell him that that, on top of the Emma thing, this was just too much for me to process right now. Instead I shrugged, avoiding the question.
“I’m going to go take a shower. Give Adele some space. Let’s talk to her after, okay?” I didn’t wait for a response.
I shed my shirt as I stalked through the hallway, then up the stairs. Adele’s condo had two full bathrooms, and since the door to her room was shut, I figured that that was where she’d retreated to. Wanting to give her privacy, I headed for the bathroom down the hall.
My hands were already loosening my belt buckle as I pushed open the heavy door. I froze in place when I discovered Adele already inside the small room, her hands hooked in the sides of her cute red panties, the cotton already lowered to reveal a tantalizing sliver of her hipbones.
“Sorry.” I didn’t want to intrude on her alone time, and I knew she’d had a hellish day, so I did my best to keep my eyes on her face, and not on the amazing, curvy little body that I knew so well. “I thought you’d be in the other bathroom. I’ll leave you alone.”
“Don’t.” I had already started to turn away, but her husky plea made me turn back. “Don’t leave.”
“Oh, baby.” She was breaking my heart. One stride and I was crushing her in my arms. She started to quiver, and I tensed, wondering what on earth had gotten her so upset—I didn’t think it was Dorian leaving. At least, not entirely.
“Adele. Babe. Tell me what’s wrong.” But she shook her head, and then her panties were on the floor, and her eager fingers were helping to finish loosen my belt.
“I don’t want to think right now.” She tugged at my jeans, shoving them down and over my hips. “Take me someplace. Take me now.”
Standing on her toes, pressing her tight little body against mine, I was reminded of the first time we’d had sex—the way she was just all over me, demanding what she wanted. Adele was a different girl now, and I could see in her eyes that she desperately wanted me to take control from her and just make her feel.
But I wasn’t like Dorian... I didn’t know how to “dominate”. I only knew how to do what felt right.
ADELE
My moan was desperate as Mal crushed me to him. His mouth found my own, and I tried to devour him whole, parting my lips and teasing with my tongue.
I could feel his arousal, his cock heavy against my belly, and I thought I could feel a hint of desperation in his kiss, too. But rather than letting me set the frenetic pace I was so desperate for,
he fisted his hands in my hair, tightly enough that I couldn’t go anywhere, and sank into our kiss.
When Mal kissed me now, he was sure in a way that he never was back when we first met. He’d grown up, gotten past the hang ups of his youth, and was a far more confident lover because of it. And that was what I wanted right now... to absorb some of his strength, while I struggled to get my feet back on the ground.
I would be okay with Dorian gone for two weeks. I wasn’t that needy, not by a long shot—I’d been through things that most girls couldn’t even imagine.
It was the possibility of where his success would lead that scared me—scared me even while I was genuinely thrilled for him and the band. Because I knew that I would never stand in the way of his dream. And that, combined with the memories that Meg brought back this morning, were enough to have me overreacting and being more than a little crazy.
“I’m sorry I was psycho for a bit there.” I pulled back just long enough to whisper this into Mal’s ear. He used the opportunity to cup my ass in his hands, his fingers awakening nerves everywhere he touched. I couldn’t help but ogle the insane flex of his biceps as he bore the weight of my body
“Stop thinking for a while.” Lifting, he deposited me gently on the bathroom counter, and I squealed when the cold tile hit my skin.
“Mal, that’s fucking cold!”
He lifted his head and grinned. “I’ll warm you up soon enough.” And then his lips were tracing the curve of my shoulder... the valley between my breasts... the slope of my belly... my inner thigh.
Then he was on his knees in front of me, hands spreading my thighs. I was exposed, open to him.
“Wrap your legs around my neck.”
The words alone, rasped against my inner thigh along with the scrape of the stubble on his jaw were the hottest thing I could imagine in that moment. Bracing my hands behind me, fingers scrabbling against the chilly tile, I tried to do as he’d asked, but I stilled almost immediately, focused on the warmth of his breath, whispered against my lower lips.
“Put your legs around my neck, woman. I’ll make it worth your while.” Sliding his hands from my hips all the way down the length of my legs, Mal did it for me, waking up the nerves in first one leg, resting it gently on his shoulder, and then repeating on the other side.
I curled my calves behind his neck so that I didn’t fall as my pulse picked up. Mal had gone down on me before, lots of times... but here, tonight, it felt different. Maybe it was the bright bathroom lighting, or the fact that it was not quite dark...
Or maybe it was that bit of desperation that we both felt. The one urging us to sink into one another and never let go.
“I’m going to taste you now.”
I’d been on the verge of gesturing down the hall and calling for Dorian to come join us, but then Mal’s thumbs parted my lower folds, and he took one long, slick swipe through me with his tongue.
“Oh fuck.” I hissed as fire erupted in my veins, then cursed when Mal paused for a moment. “Don’t tease me, Mal. Please don’t tease me.”
He removed his glasses, then grinned, a smile that was all the more wicked now that he had met Dorian. “I’ll tease you if I want to, and you’ll like it.”
And then he was back at his job, applying himself to his task with the dedication of an Olympic athlete set on winning the gold.
Another leisurely swipe, then a second, as though he was trying me out before he bought me. I squirmed, my head falling back and cracking against the mirror, but the endorphins from his touch cushioned the pain as I wiggled my hips.
“Still thinking, hmm?” Mal muttered this right against my sex, and the vibrations of the words made me whimper. And then he—attacked is the only word I could think of. Yes, he brought his first round of ammunition, and I succumbed without protest.
He slid two fingers inside of me, scissoring them inside of me, and the stretch of my slick flesh around him burned so good. He pumped those fingers in and out, the rude touch causing a surge of wet heat.
“Beautiful.” As if this was what he was waiting for, he bent again to his work, pressing a damp, open mouthed kiss over my pink flesh. The kiss moved from a promise to delivery within the blink of an eye as he proceeded to trace his tongue around my clit in a circle, just enough pressure to bring me up, up and never over.
I was on edge instantly, desperate for a full body release.
“Mal. There. Just... stay there, damn it!”
He didn’t listen, instead chuckling and changing the angle of his hand. His palm was now facing up, and he rubbed his fingers inside of me, the tips finding a super sensitive spot that made me screech and clamp my thighs around his head.
“No. No. Too much.” I panted even as my hips rocked closer to his mouth. “Oh... yes. There!”
Looking down at him through heavy eyelids, I watched raptly as he applied himself to the work of making me come. His cheeks were flushed, his mouth damp with my arousal. There was that little crease between his eyebrows that I knew so well, the one he got only when he was studying... studying or fucking.
I was pinned by the blueness of his eyes when he looked up. Locking his stare with mine, he again applied his mouth to my clit, gently suckling and at the same time rubbing that spot inside of me that was driving me wild.
“Mal!” My body jerked, my legs tightening on him until I was afraid I would strangle him. I felt the beginnings of release, a shaking deep in my core, and wanted to close my eyes against the onslaught.
But instead I was caught up in Mal, held captive by those eyes that told me it was okay to fall.
It was okay to fall, because I could trust he would be there to catch me.
“Let go, baby.” He pulled his mouth away just long enough to whisper, and I could barely hear him over the roaring of the blood in my ears. “Let go now.”
And then he scraped his teeth over my clit, a bite of pain, and at the same quickened the pace of the fingers inside of me.
I screamed, or at least, I think I did. The supernova that was bound tightly in my core exploded, and I stiffened, then melted, then stiffened again as every one of my senses combined in a mind numbing release.
Mal gathered me in a tight hug while my body was still quivering, holding me against his chest, my sweat slicking his skin. And even though my nerves were currently frazzled, the press of his cock against my leg made me want more. I wanted him inside me, wanted him to fill me until there was no room for anything else.
“Can you sit up?” Mal brushed sweaty hair away from my face, and I nodded. I slumped back against the mirror as he poured me a cup of water. When he bent to start the shower and I was treated to a view of his tight, hard ass, I found my mouth going dry despite the drink.
Steam started to build, a damp kiss on my body. I savored the warmth after the chill from my sweat.
Mal watched me drink the glass of water, then took the cup from my hands. After setting it down, he twined my fingers with his own.
“Wanna talk about it yet?”
“I—” It was so tempting, to just share the burden. And yet I didn’t.
I didn’t like secrets in a relationship. I hated having to hold one close to my heart. But the fact of the matter was...
Dorian and Mal were men. They could empathize, they could support, they could do all of the wonderful things that they already did for me. But they would never, ever be able to truly understand the person that I was inside.
I’d survived a horrific rape, and soul shredding bullying in the wake of it. I’d healed, and my guys had helped me with that more than they would ever know.
But the wounds inside of me? They would never completely disappear. There would never be a day when I would completely forget.
And men, especially my men—they wanted to fix the problem. They wanted to make it go away.
In order for me to keep healing... I needed to do this on my own.
So though I felt so torn—I knew that sharing my burden would ease it—I sho
ok my head.
I didn’t want to share. But I did want more. I wanted more of the escape from my own head that only my men could give me. I wanted things I’d never thought I would again, but that I was craving now, reaching for each dirty thought like a trophy, as if to say to myself... look how far I’d come. I wanted this kink... and I liked it.
I just had to convince these boys that I was strong enough to let them take me to those places.
“Mal, I want...” My voice trailed off. It would have been easier to tell this to Dorian, not because I loved him more or anything, but because my men were such different people.
But Mal—hmm. Dorian might have been the big boss in the bedroom. But if it involved me naked, honestly, I didn’t think Mal was going to say no.
“I want more.” Scooting to the edge of the counter, I slid off. My mouth was dry.
Just do it, Kavanaugh. Grow a pair. Though why people said to grow balls when they needed bravery, I would never understand, when balls were such weak little things.
“More?” Mal’s mouth turned up in that sexy grin of his, but before he could grab me, I just did it. I placed my feet shoulder width apart, then sank to my knees.
I heard Mal’s sharp intake of breath, and I couldn’t look up. A full body flush spread over me, and I was mortified... mortified, and so, so anxious for him to tell me that this was all right. That it was okay for me to want what I wanted.
“Fuck me.”
My head whipped around to find Dorian standing in the doorway to the bathroom. His shirt was off, his worn jeans hanging low around his hips. That spiky gold hair of his was in complete disarray, and even though Mal had just made me come so hard that I had seen stars, I wanted to lick that rock solid chest.
“I—” I opened my mouth, then closed it again. I didn’t know how to vocalize what I wanted... I kind of figured that me being on my knees would be enough. Plus, I didn’t even think I knew what it was exactly that I was searching for... not specifically.
I raised my chin defiantly and turned back to look at Mal. I expected to see him at a loss, because I knew that while he was pretty open to what we all did in the bedroom, this was his first foray into kink. I was a little worried, in fact, no matter how much I trusted him.
Kiss Me Twice Part 1 Page 5