by Lois Richer
“No.” Darla shook her head at him. “No pizza.”
“I thought you liked pizza,” he said, obviously bewildered.
“I do. But Susannah’s baby doesn’t like it.” Darla moved to sit beside Susannah. She put her hand on her stomach and gently stroked. “It kicks her and upsets her stomach when she eats pizza. Then she can’t sleep, and Susannah needs to sleep lots.” She frowned at her big brother. “We have to have something else.”
What a girl. Susannah smiled at her protector, glad she wouldn’t be forced to eat the spicy Italian food she usually loved.
“Okay. What would you prefer, Susannah? I’m guessing sushi is out?”
She made a face.
“That’s what I thought.” He grinned. “Is that because you can’t put peanut butter on sushi?”
“Ew, gross.” Darla made a gagging motion.
“You don’t have to order anything for me, but I’m sure the girls would love cheeseburgers,” Susannah said, trying to get the focus off of herself.
“Too greasy. I think stir-fried vegetables would be good.” Darla glanced at her friend. “We like Chinese food, don’t we, Silver?”
“We like it lots,” Silver agreed, grinning. “Especially me.”
“Good. Chinese it is. How about if you two come with me to pick it up. Then Susannah can have a rest.” David bent over Susannah, his nose a centimeter from hers. “And I do mean rest. Put your feet up and have a nap. No setting the table or anything else.”
“It sounds lovely,” she agreed, enjoying the way he slipped off her shoes and playfully placed them across the room. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” His toffee-toned eyes held hers for a moment.
It had been a very warm day, but Darla insisted on covering her with an afghan before they left. She tucked it around Susannah’s feet, her face brimming with concern.
“You won’t get up?” she asked anxiously.
“I promise.” Susannah waved as they left. She’d intended to watch a documentary about childbirth, but somehow her brain began replaying that moment when David had kissed her forehead. She fell to dreaming about what it would be like to be cared for, loved, by a man like him, a man who wouldn’t dump you the moment life took a wrong turn.
A man who would cherish you and protect you and make life fun again.
A man who would love a baby that wasn’t even his.
“Davy, can you help me?”
“Sure, sis. With what?”
“Susannah.” Darla frowned. “Me and Silver are worried about her.”
“You are? Why?” He’d been a little worried himself when he’d found her weeping like that. “I think she was crying because she was so happy to see that picture of her baby,” he said.
“I don’t mean that.” Darla shook her head. “Susannah gets really tired. Silver heard her tell Connie that the baby is moving around a lot and she can’t sleep. One night Silver saw her swimming and it was really late.”
“I think that’s the way it is with babies,” he said, wondering where she was going with this. “I think Susannah is okay though, Darla.”
“But Connie said the doctor told Susannah to slow down, to stop trying to do so much, and she doesn’t. Susannah thinks she has to do everything with me. It’s my fault she gets so tired.” She glanced at Silver who was playing at the juke box, then leaned closer. “Maybe if she didn’t get so tired all the time, Susannah wouldn’t want to give away her baby,” she whispered.
“Sweetie, she doesn’t want to give it away, exactly. She’s just afraid she won’t be able to look after it,” he explained.
“She won’t if she’s too tired,” Darla said. “We could adopt it. I would help.”
“I know you would, sweetie,” David said. He touched her hand. “But I don’t think Susannah wants that.”
“I guess not. We’re not a family and Susannah wants a family.” Darla sighed.
“Listen kid, you and I are a family. Always have been, always will be. Got it?” He bussed her cheek with his fist.
“Yeah, but we’re not the kind of family that can take care of a baby, are we, Davy?”
He shook his head, unsure of how to deny that. So far he’d been focused on the two of them, not on including anyone else, though he’d wanted exactly that for years.
“Could you come with us to the botanical garden tomorrow?” Darla said. “Susannah says she has to be there, but it’s hot in the butterfly exhibit and she might get too tired. She could go and rest if you were there.”
“I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon. I was going to come after that,” he told her.
“Could you put it off? Or send somebody else?” Darla asked anxiously. “We have to help Susannah now. ’Cause we love her.”
Yes, we do, he thought.
“Okay, I’ll do my best,” he promised.
“And can we get a chair and an umbrella for soccer?” she asked. “There are only hard benches there and there’s no shade.”
“I’ll figure something out, sweetie.” He hugged her, touched by her compassion. “You just tell me when you see something we can do to help, and I’ll do it.”
“Well, we were talking about that,” she said, waving at Silver to come over. “Tell him,” she ordered.
“Susannah likes flowers.” Having abandoned the juke box, Silver flopped down on a stool. “She told me nobody ever gave her flowers before. My dad gives Connie flowers lots of times.”
“Hmm. How about if we pick up some flowers on the way home.” David made a mental note to make sure Susannah got lots of flowers. Such a small thing. How sad that no one had been there to do that for her. He intended to change that.
Their food arrived and David carried it out to the car. On the way home he pulled into a flower shop and let the girls choose a bouquet for Susannah—a bright spring one. He also spotted a portable chair with a little umbrella attached.
“Perfect,” Darla told him with a grin.
Satisfied, David drove home—and found Susannah sleeping on the sofa.
“She really is Sleeping Beauty,” Darla whispered.
“No, I’m not. I’m a troll who needs her dinner. Grr,” Susannah said, eyes closed. She grinned at them as she eased upright.
David extended a hand to help her to her feet, marveling at the difference a little sleep made. Her green eyes shone with life, her skin luminous.
“Feeling better?” he asked as they laid the table.
“Much.” She blushed when he held out her chair for her and quickly sat. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” He couldn’t resist touching the swath of golden curls that cascaded down her back.
“These are for you, from us.” Darla held out the bouquet with pride.
“Oh. Thank you.” Susannah glanced at him, startled. Then she accepted the flowers and buried her nose in the fragrant petals. “They’re beautiful.”
David could have sworn he saw tears in her eyes, but when she looked at the girls, she’d blinked them away and was smiling. He got a vase, filled it with water and set it in the middle of the table so she could enjoy her bouquet.
“Only two months till Easter,” he said, holding up his water glass to toast her. “Not long to go now.”
“That’s easy for you to say. I have a quite different perspective.” She peeked through her eyelashes, grinning.
And David lost his breath. She actually sounded happy about the future.
“I’m starving,” Darla said.
“Me, two,” Susannah agreed and winked at Silver.
“Me, three.” Silver giggled.
They all looked at him with expectant eyes.
“Me, four?” Susannah burst into laughter.
“Say grace, Davy.”
David offered a quick prayer of thanks then served everyone, enjoying the pleasure of making sure each had enough to eat. It had been a long time since a meal around this kitchen table had been so happy and he knew it had everything to do with Susannah’s presence.
He couldn’t stop staring at her.
David felt compelled to study Susannah’s radiant face as the girls teased her about her appetite. This afternoon Wade and Jared had helped David realize that he wanted this woman and her child in his life permanently. His friends had insisted there was no reason why David couldn’t care for Susannah, that cutting love out of his life had never been something God had told him. Repeatedly they’d asked him to show a Biblical foundation for his belief that love was wrong for him. Wade had even said he thought David had made himself believe that after being thrown over twice.
But were they right?
And how risky was it to love her?
Susannah wasn’t like David’s former fiancées. He didn’t have to wonder if she’d walk out because he worked too long, or because of something Darla did. Susannah knew what his life was like, knew he was committed to his sister. She was committed, too.
But could she love him?
“You’re not eating,” she said, frowning at him. “Is something wrong?”
“No.” He felt the worries, the cares, the heavy thoughts go as he returned her smile. “Nothing is wrong at all.”
Life seemed so simple, so enjoyable when Susannah was there.
“I’ll help clean up,” she offered when the food had disappeared.
“There isn’t much to clean up.” David chuckled at the one lonely chicken ball rolling in sauce. “I can load everything into the dishwasher. You go and rest.”
“I did rest,” she told him, a glimmer of spirit flickering in her gorgeous eyes. “And I’m fine. Perfectly able to clean up a few dishes. So don’t argue,” she added when he opened his mouth.
“Okay. You can help a little,” he agreed, pretending he’d made the decision.
David enjoyed the camaraderie of working beside Susannah. He made a big fuss about giving her plenty of room for the sheer pleasure of watching her blush.
He drove back to Connie and Wade’s enjoying the sound of laughter and happy voices. Darla raced out of the car and up the walk with Silver, leaving him and Susannah alone in the car.
“It was nice to have someone to share our table with,” he said. “I’d forgotten how long it’s been since Darla and I entertained.”
“I hope you don’t feel you have to entertain me,” Susannah said, frowning at him. “I’m just the help.”
“Susannah, you must know you mean a lot more than that to us,” he said meaningfully. He held her gaze until she looked away.
“Thank you for these,” she said, burying her nose in her flowers. “I’ve never had—well, thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” David climbed out and went to open her car door. “What time will Darla be working at the butterfly exhibit tomorrow?”
“You’re going to come?” She didn’t look exactly thrilled at the prospect.
“I’ll try to get there,” he said. “I want to see how she does. Is that a problem?”
Susannah drew in a breath and stared past his shoulder. She wore a pained look that made him wonder if he’d said something wrong.
“Susannah? Are you all right?”
Finally she exhaled and nodded. “Yes.”
“Did something just happen?” he asked as a wave of concern rushed over him. He grasped her elbow in case she felt faint or something. “You don’t look pale.”
She slid her arm out of his touch and smiled. “I can’t get used to the soccer game going on inside me, that’s all.”
She let him escort her to the door before she hugged Darla and waved at him. “See you tomorrow.” She inclined her head at Darla. “She’ll be helping after school till five o’clock.”
“Oh. Yes. Okay.” David scanned her face once more. “You’re sure you’re all right?”
“I’m fine. Good night.” She stood in the doorway, waiting for them to leave.
“Good night.” He helped Darla into the car, and they drove away. Susannah remained in the doorway, her focus on the picture she clutched in her hands, the picture of her baby.
A wash of yearning swamped him. All down the block families were heading inside their homes, gathering their loved ones around them. David wanted to be able to do the same thing with Susannah. To protect her, to share her life, to have the right to help her with her child, and not just be an outsider.
He wanted to be able to kiss her good-night and wake up to her smiling face, to share his hopes and dreams with her, to discuss Darla and seek her opinion. He wanted Susannah to help him build a family.
God, please give me the sense to wait for the right time and find the words to tell her how much she means to me.
“I love Susannah, Davy,” Darla said, yawning as she followed him inside their dark and silent home. “She makes everything happy.”
“She sure does.”
Darla stopped at the bottom of the stairs and frowned at him.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Susannah might come and stay with us forever if you kissed her like Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty,” she said. “Couldn’t you kiss her, Davy?”
“We’ll see,” he said as he struggled to keep a straight face. “Have a good sleep, sweetie.”
“Yeah.” She hugged him, started up the stairs, then paused. “Davy?”
“Yes?” He waited, knowing something important was coming.
“Are you sure we couldn’t adopt Susannah’s baby?” Sadness drained the joy from her face. “I don’t want that baby or Susannah to go away. I love them both.”
“I know.” David embraced her and tried to soothe her, but he couldn’t tell her everything would be okay. Because he wasn’t sure it would be—not for Susannah once she let her child go, and not for him if he let Susannah go.
“What can we do, Davy?”
“Pray,” was the only answer he could think of.
Darla was doing an amazing job explaining the butterfly exhibit to the group of day-care children who were visiting the botanical garden. Susannah smiled encouragement when two older boys wandered in and began to ask Darla a hundred questions. Susannah listened but her mind was on finding somewhere to sit. She was so tired and the little butterfly gazebo was so hot.
Loud voices drew her attention.
Darla was supposed to inspect and brush off each person to ensure no butterflies hid in their clothes and escaped the enclosure. But the boys would not let her do it. In fact, they taunted her. Susannah stepped forward to intervene, but at that moment one of the boys jerked back and knocked her off balance. She reached out, desperate to grab on to a metal fountain to stop her fall.
Next thing she was lying on the ground, winded and dazed, and Darla stood over her, berating the boys.
“You hurt Susannah,” she bellowed, her anger flaring. “Get out.” She pointed to the door. As soon as they’d pushed their way through the hanging plastic panels in the exhibit, she knelt beside Susannah and searched her face. “You have a cut,” she whispered fearfully, pointing to a mark on Susannah’s arm.
“I’m okay, I think. Can you help me up?”
“Yes.” Darla almost lifted her to her feet. Thankfully the enclosure was empty.
Susannah felt woozy and worried. Darla insisted she leave the exhibit and sit down on a bench outside. Once Susannah was seated she took her phone and dialed.
“Darla, no,” Susannah protested, but it was too late.
“You said you’d come, Davy. Where are you?” Darla was angry, her brown eyes intense. “Some boys pushed Susannah and she fell down. She has a cut.”
Susannah heard David’s low voice assuring her he was on his way. She’d fallen so awkwardly—was the baby okay? It wasn’t moving. She laid one hand over her stomach protectively and tried to form a prayer for help.
“We’re really sorry.” The boys had returned to apologize. “We didn’t mean to bump into you.”
Susannah opened her mouth but Darla spoke first.
“You should be more careful,” Darla lectured. “A butterfly exhibit isn�
��t a good place to fool around. And you shouldn’t make fun of people, either,” she added, her face very severe.
“Yeah, we know,” the bigger one said with a sheepish grin. “You were just doing your job. Sorry, miss.”
As they left, Susannah shifted, feeling bruised and uncomfortable.
“You shouldn’t have phoned him, Darla. I’ll be fine. It was just a little fall.”
“At your stage, there are no little falls,” David said, striding up to them. He knelt, touching the mark on her arm before his fingers slid down to thread with hers. He squeezed them and closed his eyes. “Woman, you scared the daylights out of me.”
To her shock he gathered her in his arms and held her close.
“I’m sorry.” Susannah marveled at how right it felt to be held like this. But then she noticed how pale he was, and that his hand trembled as it smoothed back her hair. “I’m fine, David.”
“We’re going to make sure of that,” he said grimly. “You have a bruise on your chin.” His jaw clenched.
“It’s nothing.” She wouldn’t tell him how off balance she felt.
“Shall I carry you?” David held her as if he’d never let her go.
“Of course not. I can still walk.” She touched his face, smoothed away the lines on his forehead, completely overwhelmed by his concern. “I’m really all right, David,” she whispered.
“I’d prefer to hear that from a doctor,” he growled. “Darla, tell the lady you have to leave now.”
“Okay.” She hurried away but was back in a flash. “Ready.”
“All right, you walk on one side of Susannah. I’ll walk on the other,” David directed. “We’ll go slowly. Okay?”
At least he waited for her nod of approval, Susannah mused. But truthfully, she was very glad of his support. A hint of fear that she’d messed up again would not leave her.
Please don’t take my baby, she silently prayed. Please?
Deep in her heart Susannah repeated the words Connie had been telling her ever since she’d arrived in Tucson. God is the God of love.
Chapter Twelve
God? Are you listening?
David waited outside the examining room, his heart in his throat.