Chapter 3
Noah watched Attie lay out her sleeping bag, the dim glow of the lantern casting a shadow on her profile. Something about her drew him. He’d always been able to deny his attraction, but now…things were different. He would never jeopardize the mission, would rein in his feelings, because he knew there was more going on here than simple attraction.
Nothing had ever been simple between them. More complicated, if anything. The past hung between them, thick and unspoken, and he had no idea how to fix it.
He let his gaze run over the fine lines of her profile. She was still beautiful, but hardened and withdrawn where she’d always been vibrant and headstrong. She wasn’t fragile, never that, but delicate, as if teetering on the edge of something no one else could understand.
All he knew about her mission was what was in the reports she’d given to Seth during his “visits.” His gut told him there was more, but Attie wasn’t talking. She kept everything buried, refusing to talk to anyone, and turning to anger instead of family and friends.
“Turn your back so I can change out of these wet clothes,” Attie said, looking at him with eyes that were cool and guarded.
Zipping the side pocket of his pack, Noah turned his back to her, staring out the opening of the cave. He could hear her parka rustling as she took it off, then the rest of her clothing. He didn’t allow himself to imagine what her naked body looked like bathed in the soft glow of the lantern. Those were dangerous thoughts and ones he was safer ignoring.
“Your turn,” she said moments later.
He turned to find her fully dressed in at least two layers of clothing, covered neck to foot. Yet, she still looked cold. Her hands were hidden inside the sleeves of her sweater, her chin tucked inside the turtleneck collar. He wished they had a place to build a fire, but the cave was too small.
Attie turned her back when he pulled a pair of cammies out of his pack. She sat facing the wall with her legs pulled up to her chest, arms wrapped around her knees.
Noah changed quickly, sensing something was bothering her. Something more than the chemistry that sizzled between them moments ago. Her shoulders were stiff, her demeanor guarded. Carefully guarded, as if she were working hard to hide something from him.
Fully dressed, he dug two MREs out of his pack and sat across from her.
“Here.” He tossed her one.
Without a word she turned, caught it, and tore it open with her teeth.
As he ate his own he asked, “What’s on your mind, Attie?”
Her head snapped up. She wouldn’t lie to him, that much he was sure of, but she wouldn’t tell him everything either. He was on a need-to-know basis.
“I can’t sleep like this.”
They had gone full speed all day and she looked tired, so what was this about?
“You had no problem last night.”
“Last night I was in a tent far from you.”
She had set up her tent far from his. He’d chalked it up as attitude and stubbornness, but tonight he wasn’t going to be so lax. There was more to this than she was saying.
“This is the only option we have. Would you feel better if I slept in the entryway?”
“Yes.”
He stared at her in surprise. “Am I that repulsive to you?”
He’d expected her full agreement, but she remained oddly silent. He searched her face for answers.
“How about if we sleep in shifts?”
He wasn’t quite grasping the real problem here. Why wouldn’t she sleep in here with him? What did she think he was going to do? Taking a woman against her will wasn’t his style. He liked his women ready and willing. Hell, they at least had to like him. Attie made it clear she wanted nothing to do with him.
There’d been a time he’d had to fight his attraction for her, refusing to jeopardize their careers for sex. Lovers came and went; careers didn’t. He wouldn’t let Attie ruin hers for him, no matter how much he wanted her. She’d worked too hard to get where she was. He wasn’t taking that away. He knew she would resent him for it afterward, and he cared too much to let that happen.
“We’re far enough away from Brendan’s location we can sleep through the night.”
Well, she could anyway. He had no intentions of sleeping. He didn’t trust Santiago and for that reason he would sleep in ten-minute increments throughout the night. He wanted her to be well rested for tomorrow’s rendezvous, because God only knew what was waiting for them. As it was, she looked tired enough to drop.
“Do I look like a fool, Kincaid? I know how you operate. You aren’t going to sleep any more than you did last night. Just because I retired doesn’t mean I forgot how to be a soldier. We need to sleep in shifts so both of us can get some rest.”
“I’ll take first watch,” he agreed. He wasn’t challenging her skill as an agent. He remembered her confidence in the field. What he didn’t remember was her being so sensitive. She’d had to develop thick skin to overcome adversity, and looking at her now he realized Santiago had stolen more than her career. Question was, how long had he been stealing from her before Noah acted on his instincts?
His hands fisted at his sides, anger rising at the memory of what Santiago had done to her in that cell.
“No.”
He snapped back to the present.
“You won’t wake me,” she accused, guessing his intentions.
Noah rubbed his eyes with thumb and forefinger.
“Well, then, you take the first watch. I’ll relieve you in two.”
“Make it three.”
He wasn’t going to sleep more than ten minutes, let alone three hours.
“Two-and-a-half,” he countered, ignoring the scorching glare she sent him. “Care to explain why you don’t want to sleep in the same room with me?”
A number of emotions flashed in her eyes. He was bulldozing his way through her walls. The only way to get past.
“No, I don’t, but I will tell you this. I won’t be caught sleeping if Carlos Santiago decides to attack.”
Noah felt the first sting to his pride. “You know I’d wake you at the first sign of danger.”
Her eyes narrowed defiantly. “Would you?”
“Hell, yes.”
Again his pride took a beating. He would never throw an agent to the wolves and she knew it. She was just too angry and stubborn to admit it.
“Damn it, where is this coming from? You know damn well I’d never leave you unprotected.”
“I never asked for your protection. I’ve never needed anyone’s protection, or have you forgotten that?”
He snagged off his hat and raked a hand through his hair. Everything was a battle with her now. She’d always been stubborn, but damn.
“I haven’t forgotten, but I think you have,” he said quietly, stretching out on his sleeping bag and stacking his hands under his head. He still didn’t know why she didn’t want to sleep in the same vicinity and it frustrated him. She wasn’t going to budge anytime soon, which put them at an impasse. So for now he’d let her have her way while he took a combat nap.
He closed his eyes. “Goodnight, Attie.”
* * * *
Attie stared at Noah lying casually on top of his sleeping bag, watching his eyelids twitch. He was already in deep sleep and she knew that when he awoke in fifteen minutes he’d be fully rested.
In the academy he’d taught them how to sleep at any given moment and wake up minutes later, rested and alert. It had been one of the hardest things for her to learn to do. She could never seem to relax enough. The time she had spent forty-eight hours on surveillance in Azbakastan had been a different story. She had been able to take combat naps then without trouble.
Noah, on the other hand, was an expert. She’d seen him do it many times no matter what the stress level or the danger they were in. He would drop off to sleep and wake up alert and rested as if he’d gotten eight full hours of sleep. An instinct honed during his years as a Navy SEAL. A past so classified he wasn’
t allowed to discuss it. A past she’d often longed to know about. But Noah was a closed book.
Without a sound she slipped on her boots and parka, lit her lantern, and prepared to leave. There was room enough near Noah’s feet to slide out of the cave and into the entryway. Inching her way around him, she pressed against the wall the best she could without making any noise and headed for the mouth of the tunnel.
Sitting just inside the entrance, she propped her back against the cold wall of the cave and withdrew her Sig from the pocket of her parka. Outside, the wind howled through the trees. She sighed and snuggled into her parka. She knew she should sleep, but she didn’t want to risk it. Even though she was bone-weary.
Unwillingly, her eyes drifted closed.
Hot, humid air enveloped her as she stepped out of the car Carlos had sent for her. She tried to fight back her anxiety and elation at being chosen for this mission. Santiago was a big catch, and if she pulled it off she would pave the way for women in ATCOM forever. But it was more than that, it was a personal accomplishment and one she’d worked very hard to achieve.
The low slung, open-air Spanish style home sprawled in front of her was magnificent. Brightly colored flowers lined the walkway. Someone had put time and money into the design. She had never seen anything like it.
She found the heat stifling compared to the cool, crisp air of the mountains, and struggled to adjust to its thickness. Her clothes immediately clung to her, making the silk blouse uncomfortable, but she soon forgot her discomfort as Carlos Santiago came strolling toward her. A handsome man with dark hair, black eyes, and olive-colored skin that reflected his heritage. He wore a white suit tailored to fit his lean frame. Even in the heat he looked comfortable, not a wrinkle or hair out of place.
“Chrystal,” he greeted, extending his arms to grip her shoulders.
Attie hated the name, but it fit her persona. She smiled and turned a cheek for his kiss.
“So nice of you to accept my offer.”
His “offer” to become his mistress.
“Come, you must be exhausted after your journey.”
Attie spent the rest of the day being pampered. After a short tour of the estate, which she mentally mapped out, she’d been whisked away to her suite to change into a bikini that was much to skimpy for her taste, then ushered out to the Olympic-sized underground pool for a swim. While she swam and lounged, acting the perfect, useless girlfriend, Carlos sat with another man who kept sending her wary glances. Like Carlos, he had dark hair and skin, and was dressed to perfection in an expensive suit that didn’t seem to wrinkle in the humidity. Where Carlos was graying at the temples, this man was younger by at least ten years. Something about him made her uneasy, although she couldn’t put her finger on what. Then again, she got the same feeling about Carlos. It wasn’t their profession, it was something else.
Armed guards were posted at various areas of the fenced-in pool area. Attie had known coming in that Santiago took security very seriously. Rogan had pulled up satellite photos of the surveillance cameras positioned at various points of the estate, the security system, dogs and armed guards. ATCOM suspected Carlos was branching out from the drug trade and purchasing military weapons from the US, but had no proof. Part of her assignment was to find it.
The swim cooled her off, but she was still on edge, the nerves in her stomach not yet settled. She didn’t want to mess this up. It was her first undercover assignment.
Emerging from the water with numerous pairs of eyes following her, Attie picked up her towel and walked over to Carlos, who had motioned to her.
“I’d like you to meet a friend of mine. Antonio is a master of architecture. He designed this home for me as a gift.”
Attie smiled and extended a hand to the younger man.
He stood, brought her hand to his lips and planted a kiss on her knuckles. “Pleased to meet you, Chrystal,” he murmured, measuring her with a cool, wary glance.
She made a mental note to have Noah investigate an associate named Antonio. An architect or a cover?
“You did a wonderful job,” she gushed. “It’s beautiful.”
Antonio nodded and helped her into a chair, his hand lingering in hers. She looked to Carlos to see if he noticed, but he only nodded, so she settled in and spent the next hour drinking iced tea and listening to the two men talk business, but not giving her anything she could use. By the time she was excused, she was exhausted. She showered, wrapped herself in a thin silk robe and sat at the dressing table next to her bed to brush out her hair. She’d had it styled in a medium-length cut that accented the angles of her face. A knock sounded on the door. Not up to company, she bid entrance to her guest.
Carlos walked in, his dark gaze sweeping over her. “I brought you a gift,” he said, his Italian leather shoes making no sound on the plush carpet as he strode over to where she sat.
Attie turned sideways on her stool, smiling.
Carlos held out a long, black velvet box. She accepted it and slowly lifted the lid. Never one to appreciate jewelry, she forced a smile and pretended to be excited. The diamond was ridiculously large and the chain pure gold.
“It’s lovely,” she breathed.
“Allow me.”
With gentle hands Carlos slid the expensive necklace around her neck, letting the teardrop jewel rest between her breasts.
“It’s beautiful,” she said as he finished with the clasp.
“Yes, just like you.”
She was about to raise her cheek for his kiss when suddenly the necklace tightened around her throat, cutting into her skin. Her first instinct was to strike out and force him to release his hold, but she stopped herself at the last second and forced herself to sit still and endure it. If she fought back like she was trained to do, then she’d blow her cover. Chrystal wouldn’t fight back.
Carlos leaned in close, his lips touching her ear. “Rule number one: You belong to me and I will not share you unless I choose to. Antonio is off limits unless I give you to him. Understood?”
Attie nodded, eyes wide with fear.
The necklace went slack around her neck. Carlos straightened and walked to the door.
“Sweet dreams, mi amor.”
Attie waited until the door was closed to tear the necklace off and fling it on the floor. When she looked in the mirror, there was a red ring around her throat. Controlling her anger, she turned out the light and went to bed before she did something stupid.
* * * *
Something was wrong with Attie.
In the soft glow of the lantern, Noah saw the color drain from her face. She jumped when he laid a hand on her shoulder. Through the heavy parka he felt the tension in her muscles. She was coiled tight. Waiting for something only she could see. Her face was set in rigid lines, her brows drawn. Her chest rose and fell in quick, shallow breaths and he felt an occasional tremor quake over her. He wanted to crawl inside her head and see what she dreamed about. Maybe then he would know her secrets.
Carefully, he removed the gun from her lap and tucked it in his pocket, then rested a hand on each of her shoulders and spoke softly. “Attie.”
She moaned and turned her head away from him.
“Attie, wake up.”
Again she moaned and tried to shut him out by turning away. This time he shook her gently, not wanting to scare her, and watched her face become a mask of terror. Something tightened in his chest. This wasn’t Attie. She wasn’t easily frightened.
“Attie,” he said, louder and with more force.
Her eyes flew open, wide and alarmed, darting frantically around the cave. She shook like a leaf now.
“Hey, it’s me, Noah,” he said softly.
Her eyes focused on him, but she wasn’t seeing him. She looked through him. Fear clouded her expression and though she tried to rein it in she failed miserably. Wherever she was something had her waiting, scared. He wanted to chase away her demons and make her feel safe again. He wanted to get rid of the fear in her eyes.
Angry with her? What was she talking about? Or, to whom? Because this sure as hell wasn’t Attie talking.
“No, I’m not angry with you,” he said gently, unsure how to handle this.
Confusion furrowed her brow. “Then why are you here?”
Noah felt his gut clench. He wanted to know where ‘here’ was. Her prison cell? Her suite on Santiago’s estate? Where the hell was she? She was giving him pieces to a puzzle she would never reveal if she were awake and he wanted more, but he couldn’t stand seeing her this way so he gripped her shoulders and gave her a firm shake.
“Attie, snap out of it.”
She came awake with a start, blinking rapidly. Still looking haunted, she drew back and pressed herself against the wall, shaking her head.
“Attie, you’re safe. It’s Noah.”
Confusion clouded her expression as she fought to escape the nightmare. Noah wanted to draw her into his arms and make it all go away, but he knew she wouldn’t allow it. She never had, not from anyone.
Putting this kind of fear into her hadn’t been an easy task. He’d been beside her in enemy territory and she’d never shown fear. She’d surged ahead with the team and faced the enemy with confidence. She was very much like her brother when it came to bravery. Brendan walked a little closer to the edge, but shared the same grit as Attie. She held her own and, dammit, he hated seeing her like this. It hit him hard knowing that in sleep she was vulnerable. Now he knew why she didn’t want to sleep in close quarters with him. She didn’t want him to see her like this and God knew he didn’t want to because it stirred emotions in him he wasn’t prepared for.
“Talk to me,” he said, telling himself he would do the same for any of his agents and that the tightness in his chest was a normal reaction to seeing an agent suffering, but he couldn’t quite do it. Attie was different and not only because she was a woman.
“Tell me what he did to you,” he murmured, watching her eyes cloud. “The stuff you didn’t put in your reports.”
The Maze (ATCOM) Page 3