Unspoken Promises (The Unspoken Love Series Book 2)

by H. P. Davenport

  Someone will have a beautiful romantic night. Someone will experience the night that every little girl has ever dreamed of. That someone is my best friend… more importantly, that someone isn’t me.

  LINCOLN

  “No relationship is all sunshine, but two people can share one umbrella and survive the storm together.”

  – Unknown

  Tonight was New Year’s Eve and I should have brought in the New Year with Morgan in my arms. Instead, she was nowhere in sight when the clock struck midnight. After searching for her and calling her cell, Christian told me she left and said she would be back in a little bit.

  Once I left her and Camryn on the dance floor, I did a money pick up from the registers at the bar. The drinks were flowing, which meant the money was also rolling in. Morgan and I don’t like to leave too much in the registers. The bartenders cash out every two hours. We make sure all the money is accounted for and I place it in the safe in my office.

  Security was high tonight at Redemption. I called in a few favors to a couple guys I know who help out on occasion. I knew the place would be packed with it being New Year’s. That’s without Morgan advertising that Boyce Avenue was performing. Jamie approached me last week and asked if I minded if he shared the stage with them for a song, then they would take over for Side Effects at the end of the set. Hell yeah, who wouldn’t want Boyce Avenue playing in their club at any night of the year, but especially on New Year’s.

  I told him to get it cleared by Morgan first but that I was okay with it. Redemption is her baby. I run Aces, she runs Redemption. Security is the only thing I manage at Redemption. Don’t get me wrong, I check in to see how things are running, and help out when needed but all the big decisions need to be run by her without her thinking I’m trying to run her club as well as my bar. Lord knows I don’t need one more thing to cause a fight between the two of us.

  The cab ride home from the club was achingly quiet. Morgan wouldn’t even make eye contact with me, she stared out the window the entire ride home.

  When the cab stops in front of our apartment building, Morgan bolts from the backseat. I manage to catch up to her at the elevators.

  “Do you want to tell me why you’re ignoring me?”

  She crosses her arms over her chest and purses her lips.

  When the elevator comes to our floor, Morgan shoves past me into the apartment and heads straight to our bedroom. All she’s said to me the whole night was that she’d take care of the mess at the club tomorrow.

  My mind tells me one thing and my heart is telling me another. Right now, my heart has won this battle because I just want my Morgan back. I want things back to the way they used to be, and I’m fucked trying to figure out how to get us back there when Morgan blames herself as much as I blame myself… and it’s killing us both slowly.

  I get that we both blame ourselves for what happened to Camryn, but Camryn has assured us repeatedly that she doesn’t hold either one of us accountable for her attack. My guilt still wrenches inside me. The attack caused a huge wedge between the two of us. We’re both dealing with the same problem, yet, we can’t comfort each other. Camryn appears to be moving on from it, so why can’t we? Whatever the hell is going on with her needs to end…quickly. We both need to get over this and concentrate on our relationship.

  The sound of drawers being opened and slammed shut echoes throughout the apartment. My legs feel like they are weighted to the floor with the amount of dread consuming me. With each step, my stomach tightens. One thing is certain, Morgan is pissed because my girl is never quiet. And I mean never.

  When I get to the bedroom, her back is toward me. She pulls her shirt over her head and she throws it at me, hitting me in the chest.

  “Do you care to tell me why you were an ass at Redemption tonight?”

  “What are you talking about?” I ask, walking into the bathroom.

  “Don’t act stupid, Lincoln. Let me refresh your memory. You were all smiles with Camryn dancing it up on the dance floor, and the minute I walked over to the two of you, you beelined it out of there. Do I need to paint you a picture? It happened a few hours ago, I’m sure you remember,” Morgan says with her arms crossed over her chest.

  I don’t want to have this fight tonight. All I want to do is get in the shower, brush my teeth and go to bed.

  “Why are you being a drama queen? I was dancing with Camryn. No big deal. Don’t make it one. I am not having this ridiculous argument with you.”

  I shut the door to the bathroom. The sound of the lock, echoes in the quiet bathroom. Yeah, it’s a dick move, but I’m not in the mood for this bullshit tonight. I saw Morgan staring at me while I was dancing with Camryn. Big fucking deal. I can have a good time once in a while. Her demeanor when she watched us from afar showed she was angry. As much as she tried to school her facial expression, I saw the hurt in her eyes. She doesn’t think I noticed, but I saw her wipe the tears from her face.

  If Morgan hadn’t been walking around like the goddamn ice queen since Camryn’s attack, then maybe I would have pulled her into my arms and danced with her like I wanted to.

  Two months ago that would have happened. But not now. I’m not sure when things will feel good between the two of us.

  I don’t know what she wants from me lately. We are so hot and cold with each other. Walking on egg shells around each other, afraid to say the wrong thing and piss each other off.

  Morgan pounds on the door. “Damn you, Lincoln, open up this door. Now!” she screams.

  I ignore her, turning on the water.

  “Lincoln!”

  “Morgan, I want to shower in peace. Please leave me alone. Go to bed.” I somehow keep my voice calm and steady.

  I step into the shower, the hot water cascades down my tense body. I put my head under the shower head so I can’t hear anything around me except for the sound of the water. I’m not sure if she’s still yelling, but I plan to have some peace and quiet. Even if it’s just a few minutes until the water runs colds.

  Am I a dick if I pray she’s asleep by the time I finish? But I know my girl, she’ll probably be waiting for me ten times angrier than she is right now.

  Talking, ha. If the two of us would talk then we probably wouldn’t be in this position. But after finding out she left the club without telling me, I’m pissed, too. I don’t want to talk tonight. We can discuss whatever is bothering her tomorrow. What a great fucking way to start off the New Year.

  The two of us have never had issues. When I say never, I mean never. It’s something I’ve loved about our relationship. We flow effortlessly yet this situation has caused a complete stop to the energy the two of us have together. I want to fix it, we need to fix it together, but I have no idea what to do to get us back there and it’s obvious that Morgan doesn’t know either based on her actions from tonight.

  When the water runs cold, I reluctantly turn the faucet off. I grab the thick cream towel off the vanity and dry myself off quickly, wrapping the towel around my waist. There’s silence on the other side of the door that hopefully means Morgan fell asleep.

  I want to fix what is going on with us, but emotions are running high tonight. With both of us angry, I fear this discussion will turn into an argument very quickly.

  I brush my teeth, and head out to the bedroom, which connects to the bathroom.

  The bedroom is quiet and dark. The room sort of resembles how our relationship is in this moment. Neither one of us really communicate with each other, and the flames that once burned between us, seems to be burning embers. The fire that once roared is dying. It hurts my heart that we’ve become this. I know it was a dick move to lock her out of the bathroom, but I needed that time to gather my thoughts, to calm the anger that was brewing inside me.

  I remove my towel, tossing it over the bathroom door to dry and climb into bed. Morgan is lying on her side, her back facing me.

  A knife goes through my heart when I hear her sniffling. I hate hearing her cry. I hate knowi
ng that I made her cry. I’d rather shove toothpicks under my own fingernails than see my girl upset. I roll over on my side, reach out and pull her up against my chest. She doesn’t say a word, but she doesn’t pull away either.

  “Baby, don’t cry.”

  I pull her body against mine, her back against my chest. My hands find hers, possessively interlacing our fingers.

  “I love you, baby.”

  Silence.

  “You know that, right?” I ask. “You know I love you.”

  “I know,” she whispers.

  My heart is breaking into a million pieces the more she sobs. Morgan isn’t one to cry. She is the strong one and wears her armor well. Rarely does she show a vulnerable side to even me. She may joke and say she doesn’t have feelings, but I know her. She has a huge heart, one that she only allows a few select people to see. So when my girl hurts, I hurt. It kills me knowing that I have no idea how to fix what is going on between us

  “I’m sorry.”

  “What are you sorry for?” she asks, her voice fragile and shaking.

  “For everything. I’m sorry for everything that is going wrong between us.”

  Her cries become louder.

  “Do you know what I had to do tonight?”

  “What?”

  “I had to make my dream come true for someone else.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “How I would want you to propose to me. I had to do that for Camryn.”

  Talk about a kick in the balls. So besides her being pissed at me for walking away from her at the club without saying a word to her, she’s upset that Camryn got engaged tonight and she doesn’t have a ring on her finger.

  I have every intention of spending the rest of my life with Morgan. But marrying her, that was totally something different. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying marriage wouldn’t be great, it’s just not something I want to do. I thought I made that perfectly clear over the years. I’ve never filled Morgan’s head with the idea that I wanted to marry her. I’ve always told her I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. But that didn’t mean I was going to marry her. She knows what my childhood was like.

  My parents went through one hell of a nasty divorce. My dad cheated on my mom when I was little. Things were always volatile between them after the divorce. Weekend visits with my dad didn’t always go as planned, which meant I was left with feelings that he didn’t love me. That he didn’t want me. It left me thinking that he didn’t have time in this life for me anymore now that he had a new wife, a new family, a new stepson.

  Many days I sat on my doorstep with my overnight bag tucked between my feet, waiting for him to pick me up. Needless to say, after hours of sitting on the cold step, I was left to pick up my bag and carry it back inside with me.

  He had excuse after excuse why he didn’t make it. “I got stuck at the station, son.” “My car broke down.” “Mary and I went away for the weekend, buddy. I forgot it was my weekend with you.”

  Years of being rejected by your own flesh and blood can do damage to a person. I never want to be in the position that I could hurt the person I love. I’m a firm believer, I don’t need a piece of paper to prove my love to Morgan. There’s that saying, ‘If it’s not broke, then don’t try and fix it.’ That’s exactly how I feel. If shit is good between us without a ring and a piece of paper, I’m game to keep it that way. I saw how broken my mom was when her marriage failed. I will never put myself in that position to hurt someone like that.

  She pushes her ass against my groin causing me to become aroused. “Are you listening to me? Have you heard one word I said?” she asks with annoyance.

  I push the thoughts of my childhood out of my mind. It’s not a place I want to go. Not tonight... not ever.

  “Do you know how that made me feel? Do you have any clue? I got to do that after you walked away from me at the club. It was like a kick in the stomach. With everything going on with us. I had to put on my happy face and make sure Camryn’s proposal was the best and most romantic night she could have dreamt of.” Her voice breaks.

  “Morgan, I will always love you, but you know I can’t…” my voice catches. “I won’t marry you.”

  “Why not? Why am I capable of being your bed buddy but not your wife?” Anger emanates off of her in waves.

  “You know why.” My response is harsher than I intended.

  “We’re not them. You’re not him.” Her tone holds a slight bitterness.

  “We’ll figure it out. I promise.” This is all I can give her right now, an empty promise with no chance of follow through.

  “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Lincoln. Promises are worse than lies. You don’t just make me believe them, you make me hope for them.”

  I place a light kiss on her neck. “Morgan,” I whisper. “I promise you that I will never love anyone the way I love you. You’re it for me, baby. We’ll get through this.”

  Morgan rolls over to face me, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

  A look of despair crosses her face. “Are you sure? Cause lately, I’m not so sure we will make it. I feel disconnected from you. There’s a void in my heart. You’ve always been the air that I need to breathe. But recently, I feel like I am drowning.” Her voice is absolutely emotionless and it chills me. It’s like she’s given up. Fear twists around my heart.

  I don’t respond. How can I? This is the one question I don’t have the answer to. Are we strong enough to get through this? I sure as hell hope so, because I have no idea what I’d do if Morgan wasn’t in my life…by my side. Just thinking of it, my stomach clenches.

  “Lincoln, things have to change. I can’t keep going on like this.”

  “It’s easier said than done, baby. Trust me. We both need to fix this.”

  “I’ve finally come to terms with what happened to Camryn wasn’t my fault. It was an accident. I’ve let that guilt go.”

  She grabs my hand, intertwining our fingers. She lifts our joined hands to her lips and places a soft kiss on my knuckles.

  “I know I pushed you away. I know that wasn’t the right way to handle it. We were both dealing with the guilt of that night. Rather than leaning on each other, we both handled it wrong. Knowing that Camryn has moved on made me realize that I needed to let it go.” She shudders against me and draws in a sharp breath.

  “I know I handled things completely wrong, baby. We were both dealing with the same issue, we should have pulled strength from each other. Instead we allowed the guilt to create distance between us.”

  “I know I let the guilt from that night destroy me. I let it work its way into my heart, into my soul and I allowed it to destroy my relationship with you. Why couldn’t I lean on you? Why couldn’t I let you love me through it? Why did I push you away?”

  “You didn’t destroy our relationship. I’m still here, aren’t I? We hit a bumpy patch in our journey. But our journey in life doesn’t end here.”

  “How did we let us get to this point, Lincoln?”

  “We stopped communicating. Rather than dealing with it together, we ignored it. After a while, it became too much and the dam broke,” I say matter-of-factly.

  “I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don’t ever want to feel like this again. I don’t want to feel like I am going through life alone,” she speaks in a choked voice.

  I lean in and kiss Morgan’s lips softly. “I’ll be by your side every step of the way.”

  Morgan lets go of my hand and rolls over, cuddling her back against my chest.

  I pull her tighter against me and place a soft kiss on her shoulder. “Let’s get some sleep. Happy New Year, baby.”

  “Happy New Year’s, babe.” Her voice was shakier than I would have liked.

  Neither one of us says anything for a few moments. The sound of our breathing fills the room. Slowly my hand move downward, skimming the side of her body to her thigh. I feel her relax against my chest. My hand moves gently back up her soft
curves and I fondle one small globe, her nipple hardening from my touch. Gently my hand sears a path down her abdomen and searches for her pleasure points. I push her panties to the side and spread her thighs apart. I slip my finger in.

  Morgan tries to close her legs. “Leave them open.” I hear her take a deep breath and let it out.

  I move my finger inside her, hitting the spot within her that she loves.

  Her right hand caresses the length of my thigh. When I hit her g-spot, she digs her nails into my thigh as she moans. Morgan pushes her ass against my growing erection.

  “You like that,” I ask.

  “Don’t stop,” she pants.

  “Tell me what you want.” I say, burying my face into her neck. I nibble her earlobe. My lips sear a path down her neck, her shoulder, biting then kissing the same spot. I suck hard on the spot she loves and I know it will leave a mark. I don’t care. I’m marking Morgan tonight. I’m reclaiming what’s mine.

  She moans and grinds against my hand. I know she’s close. The warmth of her soft skin is intoxicating. She begins to tighten around my finger. Her pussy grips my finger like a vise. I withdraw it slowly. I’m not letting her come yet. I need to be inside her when she comes.

  She gasps when I remove my finger. “I need you inside me, Lincoln. I want you to make love to me…now.”

  I pull away and Morgan lies on her back. I kiss her, lingering, savoring every moment. A moan of ecstasy slips from her lips.

  I trail soft kisses down the length of her torso, until I reach the top of her panties. My fingers grip the sides of them and slowly work them down her legs.

  Once I rid her of those, my lips sear a path up her body. My lips hard and searching. Nipping, biting and sucking until I reach her mouth.

  I crawl on top of her, careful not to crush her with my weight and push my hips, grinding against her core.

  My lips brush against hers. “I need you, Morgan. Tell me you want me.”