Unspoken Promises (The Unspoken Love Series Book 2)

by H. P. Davenport

  “I… think I’m gonna be sick.” I bolt to the bathroom slamming the door behind me.

  The moment my knees hit the floor, I lose the contents in my stomach. I hit the handle to flush the toilet. Once my stomach is empty, I lean against the cold tiles on the wall, trying to avoid throwing up again. My pulse pounds through my entire body, drowning out the noise around me.

  “Morgan, are you okay in there? Do you need anything?” Camryn asks, her voice filled with concern.

  Pain lances through my head. This can’t be happening. I can’t be pregnant. I ignore Camryn’s questions on the other side of the door. After a few minutes, the door creaks open. Camryn comes in and sits on the floor next to me. She pulls my head into her lap, her hand soothing my head, pushing my hair back from my face.

  My body shakes in her lap. I couldn’t control the spasmodic trembling within me. A sob breaks free. I weep aloud, as Camryn rocks me in her lap.

  “Shhh, everything will be okay. We’ll figure this out… together.”

  The past few weeks have been hell for me. I’m nauseous seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day. After every meal, I do the same. I never thought I was religious, but every day I find myself on my hands and knees praying to God to make it stop.

  The exam room is as cold as Antarctica. My breasts are sore as shit to start with and add how damn cold it is in here, my nipples are rock hard, not to mention sensitive.

  My ass is practically hanging off the end of the table and I’m spread wide eagle with my feet securely in the stirrups. My girly is on full display here today.

  “Oh, what are you doing with that?” I ask when the technician holds up a long—and I mean long—wand and applies a condom to it. The thing looks like something I’d find in a sex shop, or even in my night stand. I’ve picked up quite a stock of toys since I’ve been single. A girl has needs, not to mention a horny pregnant girl with no one around to satisfy them.

  “Since you’re not quite sure when your last menstrual cycle was, we’ll get a better idea how far along you are once we do an ultrasound. At this stage, we’ll do a transvaginal one to get a clearer picture,” the technician declares.

  I feel light pressure as she inserts the wand in me. Images of my uterus appear on the monitor. My eyes dash around the screen trying to see my baby. All I see is a black grainy screen.

  “Do you hear that?” she asks.

  The sound of my baby’s heartbeat fills the room. It’s like angels singing. Tears well in my eyes. I can’t hold back my emotions as they flow continuously down my cheeks.

  “That’s your baby’s heartbeat. We’ll be able to estimates his or her age by measuring the length from top to bottom; the baby is tiny in the first trimester and is growing about a millimeter a day. This will help us determine a more accurate due date and track milestones during your pregnancy.”

  “See that, right here?” the technician asks and points to the screen. “That is your baby.”

  I can’t believe there’s a baby in there. My hand instinctively moves to my stomach. In a few months, my stomach won’t be so flat.

  My eyes lock with the black and white image of my baby on the monitor. It’s amazing how the sound waves show a picture of my baby in my uterus.

  “It doesn’t look like anything. I only see a spot.” I squint hoping to get a better idea of what my baby looks like.

  “We’ll be able to get a clearer image when you’re around thirteen weeks.”

  Dr. Brownlow enters the room shortly after my ultrasound is complete. “Your baby is healthy and all is well. You’re approximately eight weeks.”

  Tears run down my cheeks… happy tears.

  She hands me a few pictures from my ultrasound. She points to a circle on the picture. “This is your baby. The baby is growing inside a small sac, called the gestation sac. The size and appearance of this sac appears normal. The baby is approximately five to nine millimeters long.”

  I run my finger across the image. “My little peanut,” I whisper. I always imagined Lincoln would be the one waiting impatiently with me for the results to appear on a pregnancy test. I imagined he would be by my side when I went to my doctor’s appointments. I pictured my hand intertwined with his while we heard our baby’s heartbeat for the first time. We were supposed to share this experience together.

  Lincoln wasn’t there for my appointment, rather Camryn waited for me in the waiting room. I didn’t feel comfortable having Camryn come back with me. If Lincoln wasn’t there, I didn’t want to share this moment with anyone else. Guilt washes over me. He should be here. I should tell him about the baby.

  When I enter the waiting room, Camryn jumps up from her seat excitedly. “Do you have a picture? Let me see it.”

  I laugh at her. “Here’s a picture of your little niece or nephew. I got an extra copy for you. Just don’t let Jamie see it. Not yet.”

  “I hate keeping secrets from him. I don’t like lying.”

  “I’m not asking you to lie, I’m only asking you to avoid the truth. At least until I tell Lincoln.”

  I have all intentions of telling Lincoln that I’m pregnant, I just haven’t found the right time. Ever since the night I showed up at his apartment, I have a feeling he’s avoiding me. He hasn’t been to Redemption. We correspond through text and emails. Strictly business. Nothing more nothing less. I know this is hard on him. I understand why he told me he couldn’t continue to sleep with me if we weren’t together. It muddies the water worse than they already are. This pregnancy news is going to do more than muddy the waters, it’s going to permanently cloud them without a chance of clearing.

  LINCOLN

  “I only miss you when I’m breathing.”

  – Unknown

  No matter how low I have the air-conditioning set, it is hot as hell in Aces. August in New York City is a scorcher. The temperature this week has been record breaking. Great for business, because nobody wants to spend their days and nights outside.

  Dîner en Blanc—NYC’s pièce de résistance of picnics—returns to New York every year to give Gothamites an opportunity to show off their all-white wardrobe, decorative skills, and Top Chef-level cooking. The location for the event changes every year, which makes the party hard to crash, but this year, it is set up down the street from the bar.

  We’ve had a steady flow of customers all day. I even had to call in a few of the waitresses who were scheduled off to help out. Tonight when it ends, I’m hoping the people there will come to Aces. Side Effects is scheduled to go on at eleven. Jamie, Parker, a member of the band and Christian already have the stage and instruments set up. Sound check already complete.

  The guys are sitting at their regular table by the stage. I hand a customer a beer when I see Camryn and Karsen walk through the door and head toward the bar.

  “What can I get you lovely ladies tonight?”

  “I’ll have a Malibu Baybreeze,” Camryn says.

  “I’ll take a margarita, please.” Karsen says. “It’s been a long day.”

  “I can tell, you’re still in your scrubs. No time to change?” I ask.

  “I didn’t feel like heading home to shower. I wanted to hear the guys play. I miss seeing them perform with my crazy work schedule.”

  I nod my head. I understand more than anyone about crazy work schedules. I’ve been spending a lot of time here to keep myself busy.

  I make the girls their drinks and they head over to the table with the guys.

  The clock on the wall reads ten-forty-five. The band should be starting. The bar is busy and the waitresses are hustling. With a free minute, I walk over to the table to speak to the group.

  “Everyone okay over here?” I ask. “Do you need me to have the waitress get you more drinks?”

  “No, I’m good,” Camryn responds.

  “I’m good for now, but I definitely will be needing another one of these,” Karsen says lifting her drink to her lips to take a sip.

  “No Morgan tonight?” I ask.

/>   Camryn nods her head and frowns. I haven’t seen Morgan since she left my apartment that morning. I’m not going to lie, it’s been tough. Having her in my arms that night wasn’t enough.

  Lindsey walks over and kisses me on the cheek. “Hey, stranger. I haven’t seen you in a while. How are you?” she asks patting my arm.

  “I’m good. Trying to stay busy. Giving Morgan the space she wants.”

  Lindsey’s eyes flash with sadness. “I’m sorry you two are going through this.”

  “Me, too. Well, I better get back to work. I’ll stop back over when things slow down later.”

  “Enjoy the show,” Jamie says as he pecks Camryn on her lips.

  Isaac climbs behind his drum kit and the stage goes dark. Parker starts the low bass line of the first song.

  All the lights go out in the bar. A spotlight shines on Jamie when he sings the opening lines of “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails. The crowd goes wild, throwing their hands in the air as they sing along to the words of the song. I look over at my friends, Camryn is laughing, Karsen has her hand in the air and sings along. The only thing missing is Morgan. She should be here enjoying the night with her friends. This was our normal. It’s sad how quickly things can change.

  They perform “Monsters” by Eddie Gomez, and “Come Over” by Sam Hunt which has all the ladies waving their hands slowly in the air for them. My stomach drops when I hear the words to “Come Over”. Every time I hear this song, Morgan comes to mind.

  Side Effects plays a full set. Jamie and the rest of the guys climb down from the stage and take a seat at the table. I send a round of beers over to the band and fresh drinks for the ladies. The DJ picks up after Side Effects and plays “One Dance” by Drake, Wizkid and Kyla. Karsen, Camryn and Lindsey waste no time and find a spot on the dance floor. The three of them move their hips and draw attention from almost every male in this place. Jamie stares at his wife with a smile on his face the entire time. Camryn points her finger at Jamie, beckoning him to come to her. He laughs and shakes his head. Karsen walks back to the table and grabs Christian’s hand and drags him to the dance floor.

  Christian pulls Karsen close to his body, his hands on her hips. He leans down and says something in her ear, making her push on his chest and laugh. Christian wiggles his brows at her. Good Lord, I can only imagine what Casanova is saying to her. I’m lucky to have such an amazing group of friends. All of them have been supportive with the breakup, not that I thought they would get in the middle. I figured it would be difficult for the girls, but no one has chosen sides, which I’m happy for.

  Feeling a little melancholy, I head toward the office and close the door behind me. After I collapse into my chair at my desk and lean my head back against the headrest I close my eyes for an instant when there is a knock at the door. Maybe if I don’t acknowledge them, whomever it is, they’ll go away. They knock again and slowly open the door.

  “Hey, do you mind if I come in?” Lauren, one of the waitresses from Redemption asks as she peers around the opened door.

  “Sure. What can I help you with?” I ask.

  She closes the door behind her and walks over and stands in front of the desk.

  “I just wanted to check on you. To see how you are,” she says.

  I raise my brow at her. “You wanted to check on me?” I ask.

  She nods her head. “You don’t seem happy, sort of preoccupied lately.”

  “Things are a little crazy lately.”

  Walking slowly, her hips sway as she unbuttons her blouse with trembling hands. She walks around my desk, and sits on top of it, placing her legs on the arms of my chair. The skirt she has on leaves little to the imagination.

  “Excuse me, what do you think you’re doing?” I ask, my voice laced with frustration. I am not in the mood for this bullshit. I’ve never given this girl an inkling that I was interested. What the hell is she thinking?

  She leans forward and runs her finger down the front of my shirt, over my chest. I grab her wrist stopping her from doing anything more.

  “I heard that you’re single. I thought maybe we could have a little fun.”

  I laugh. “That’s what you thought? What gave you the idea I would be interested?” I reply with contempt that forbade any further argument.

  “I see the way you look at me,” she says in a silky voice.

  I chuckle nastily and stare at her boldly, assessing her frankly. “The way I look at you?”

  Is she for real? Am I being punked right now? Are there cameras in my office and someone is going to jump out and yell “gotcha”?

  “Let’s get something straight. Only one woman blinds me with her attraction and it’s not you.” I stop and inhale a deep breath. “So if you want to keep your job, I suggest you button your shirt back up and get your ass off my desk.” My voice is firm.

  She shrugs out of her shirt and it falls to the desk revealing a red lace bra.

  “What do you think you’re doing? Put your shirt back on. Now!”

  At that exact moment, my office door opens again. Immediately loud music floods the office. This can’t be happening. I’m living a nightmare.

  I freeze, mind and body benumbed.

  Morgan stands frozen in the doorway. Her eyes widen in horror at the sight before her. “You have got to be kidding me!” she sneers. “This must be some sick joke.”

  “Morgan, this isn’t what it looks like.” I stiffen at her unspoken accusation.

  She moves quickly, her jaw tightening. In one swift motion, she grabs this chick by the hair and drags her toward the door, pushing her out of the office. “You’re fired. So help me, you better be gone before I leave this office.”

  Morgan slams the door in her face. The sound echoes throughout the office causing me to flinch.

  “You’re fucking the help,” she screams and glares at me with burning, reproachful eyes. A chill black silence surrounds us.

  “Nothing happened!” I scream. “Stop assuming the worst, Morgan. You told me nothing happened with you and Greg and I believed you. Give me the same respect,” I slam my hands on the desk in front of me.

  Roughly I thrust my chair away from the desk. Curses fall from my mouth. I come close to her, looking down at her intensely. “Morgan, it’s not what it looks like. Please, listen to me.”

  Taking a deep, unsteady breath, she steps back from my closeness.

  “It’s not what it looks like? Do you think I’m an idiot? Her top was off!” she says harshly.

  “Will you stop and let me explain?” I sigh with exasperation. My heart beats rapidly, my chest feels as if it will burst.

  “I’m done. I shouldn’t have come here. I don’t know what I was thinking,” her tone hardens.

  Her expression grows rigid, pained with loathing.

  “You’ll listen to me. Lauren came in here. Next thing I know, she was unbuttoning her shirt. I told her if she wanted to keep your job, she better get her ass off my desk and get dressed. That’s the part you missed. You missed the part where I told her I only want one woman and it surely wasn’t her.”

  In a defensive gesture, she folds her arms across her chest.

  “Are you done?” She grinds out between gritted teeth. Morgan’s eyes are dark, stormy and conflicted.

  “You know what, we’re just so fucked up I don’t know what to do anymore,” my voice fills with desperation.

  She turns on her heel. I halt her escape with a firm hand on her arm. Hastily she withdraws her arm quickly.

  “Don’t touch me. Don’t ever touch me again.” Her expression was one of mute wretchedness. She seethes with anger. Her brown eyes claw me like talons.

  She turns away, not waiting for an explanation.

  “Morgan! Wait!” I yell after her.

  MORGAN

  “That feeling you get in your stomach when your heart’s broken. It’s like all the butterflies just died.”

  – Unknown

  I step out into the rain and wrap my arms around my c
hest and let out a sob… not because of what I saw, but because my heart literally hurts. Between the black skies, and my red eyes, I can barely see.

  My heart is in a thousand pieces.

  To think he loved me.

  I hate him.

  How could I have loved him for all those years?

  How could he do that to me right under my nose?

  Did I even know him?

  What the hell just happened?

  I close my eyes and imagine what my life could have been like. If only he wanted the same thing. But here I stand on the sidewalk in New York City praying that a cab comes before I lose my shit here on the corner. Although death sounds good right about now. I wouldn’t feel the pain that I feel at this very moment. I’d take feeling nothing over this.

  With all these thoughts running through my head, I don’t even notice a cab pull up to the curb. I jump when he honks the horn to alert me of his arrival.

  I quickly open the door and slide across the seat. The cool air of the cab makes my body shiver.

  The moment I pull the door shut, Lincoln races out of the club. His hands bang hard against the window. “Morgan, stop!”

  “Can you get me out of here? Now!” I plea to the cab driver.

  Lincoln bangs on the window again. “Morgan, don’t go. Please!”

  Tears fall down my cheeks.

  “Where to, Miss?” the cab driver asks.

  I rattle off my address. “I need to get out of here. Can you leave now!”

  “Sure thing, ma’am,” he says as tears cascade down my cheeks.

  Lincoln bangs on the trunk of the cab as it pulls away. “Morgan, don’t do this!” he yells.

  I don’t know why I did it, but I couldn’t help myself. I look out the rear window and see Lincoln in the middle of the street, his shirt clinging to his body wet from the rain, with his hands in his hair.

  “Morgan!” he howls.

  I watch sorrowfully, as his form grows blurry in the distance.

  The cab makes a left at the intersection. I lean my head against the headrest and close my eyes. I can’t believe what I just saw. How could he do that to me? On his desk. The desk that we’ve been intimate on. I didn’t think he could ever do something so repulsive. Boy, was I wrong.