Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores
Page 22
BEST BEHIND THE BENCH
Scotty Bowman had a long and honorable coaching career.
Larry Robinson, the standout Montreal Canadien defenceman during the team’s exceptional success in the 1970s, offered perhaps the best summation of head coach Scotty Bowman: “There were times when I didn’t think I could stand him any longer but I didn’t want to marry him. I did know that if I did what he told me and the team did, too, we would all be successful. You might not like his approach but, most of the time, the end results were the thing you loved—winning!”
AND WIN HE DID…
Bowman stands alone among NHL coaches. In 30 seasons at the helm of four teams, Bowman won the Stanley Cup a record nine times: five with the Canadiens, one with the Pittsburgh Penguins and three with the Detroit Red Wings. One of his mentors and coaching heroes, Toe Blake, guided the Canadiens to eight Cup championships from 1955 to 1968. Only one other man, Hap Day, coached teams to more than four championships—five with his Toronto Maple Leafs. In 2,141 schedule games, Bowman’s teams won 1,244 and tied 313 for a winning percentage of .654. Only one other coach, Al Arbour, has more than 700 wins. In the playoffs, Bowman has 223 wins in 353 games, 100 more wins than second-place Arbour.
VIEWS AT VARIANCE
Survey the dozens of players on his teams over those 30 years, and it would be rare to find two with the same impression of the man. Some saw him as a whip-cracking disciplinarian who was cold and aloof personally, unable to express emotion, true feelings or sincere encouragement. Others felt he was a genius—much smarter and more knowledgeable than the men behind the other benches—and the best praise they could receive from him was when he said nothing about their play.
A SIMPLE GAME
In discussing the game, Bowman always made his outlook on hockey sound simple. Asked once what the most important part of coaching, his reply was terse: “Having the right players on the ice.” Pressed to expand on that, Bowman said, “If the other team is using, say, a right-winger and he will overpower the left-winger we have opposite him, then we have to make a quick change and get a guy out there who can handle him. If we leave out an overmatched player and the opposition scores a goal, then we have to score two to get a lead. That’s much more difficult to do than making the change of players to keep the other team from scoring. If they don’t score, then we only need one to get the lead.”
DEFENCE, WHO NEEDS IT?
While Bowman’s championship teams with the Canadiens, Penguins and Red Wings all had high-scoring attacks, their strongest asset was always defence. But even on the subject of goal prevention, he had a unique approach. “Often teams that can score never get enough credit for their defensive play,” Bowman said. “With, say, the Canadiens, puck control was a big part of our defence. The so-called thinkers in the game figured a great defensive team was one that turned the puck over to the opposition, then checked them strongly. I always figure that if we had the puck ourselves and it was under control, the other team wasn’t going to score much. That seemed like pretty good defence to me, anyway.”
WHAT A RISE!
A Montreal native, Bowman played top level junior hockey in the Canadiens system, then suffered a serious head injury. Contrary to popular belief, the injury did not end his career; he played 90 junior games afterwards. When his junior days were over, he moved into coaching youngsters and scouting for the Canadiens, rising through the ranks to be coach of major junior clubs in Peterborough and Montreal. He logged time with the Canadiens minor-pro farm teams, working as assistant manager and coach to Sam Pollock, who became hockey’s top executive with the NHL Canadiens. When the NHL expanded by six teams in 1967, Bowman was hired by the new St. Louis Blues as GM and head coach. Assembling a team of veterans and overlooked youngsters, Bowman remarkably took the Blues to the Stanley Cup final in each of the team’s first three seasons in the league. He returned to the Canadiens organization as head coach in 1972 and over the next seven seasons with them he recorded five Stanley Cup wins—four consecutive from 1976–1979.
FOUR MORE AS COACH
When Pollock left the GM’s job to go into private business, Bowman felt snubbed when not named as replacement and resigned from the team. He was hired as GM and coach of the Buffalo Sabres, where he encountered the only weak stretch in his career. The Sabres were only a .500 playoff team in his six years at the helm, after which he did television analysis for a season. He joined the Penguins as personnel director but when head coach “Badger” Bob Johnson—who had guided the Pens to the Cup the previous season—died suddenly just before the 1992–93 schedule, Bowman was named coach and he led them to the 1993 crown. He moved to the Red Wings as head coach for the 1993–94 season, a stay that lasted for nine seasons, winning the Cup in 1997, 1998 and 2002. With all the coaching records strongly in his book, Bowman announced his retirement from coaching during the 2002 on-ice victory celebrations. Bowman wasn’t done winning Cups, though:. he got his name engraved on Lord Stanley’s Mug again in 2010 as Senior Advisor of Hockey Operations of the Chicago Blackhawks.
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“Ice hockey is a form of disorderly conduct in which the score is kept.”
—Doug Larson
“A puck is a hard rubber disc that hockey players strike when they can’t hit one another.”
—sports columnist Jimmy Cannon
“We take the shortest route to the puck and arrive in ill humor.”
—Bobby Clarke,
captain of the Philadelphia Flyers, 1972
THE GREAT UNCLE JOHN’S BATHROOM READER HOCKEY QUIZ
1) In 1971, the Montreal Canadiens traded to acquire the first-round draft position to select a young Guy Lafleur. With what team did they make the trade?
a) Cleveland Barons
b) Atlanta Flames
c) California Golden Seals
d) Minnesota North Stars
e) Vancouver Canucks
2) Who is the only coach to lose 12 Stanley Cup Finals?
a) Dick Irvin
b) Scotty Bowman
c) Al Arbour
d) Jack Adams
e) Don Cherry
3) The floundering Vancouver Canucks of the 1970s once employed an outside consultant to help winger Rosaire Paiement out of a scoring slump. Whom did they hire?
a) Reveen the Impossiblist
b) Dr. Joyce Brothers
c) Maurice Richard
d) A Las Vegas stripper
e) A priest
4) Match the following players to the appropriate nationality:
a) Sergei Priakin 1) Slovakian
b) Ivan Hlinka 2) Yugoslavian
c) Ivan Boldirev 3) Ukrainian
d) Alexei Zhitnik 4) Czech
e) Marian Gaborik 5) Russian
5) Who said, “I don’t like hockey. I’m just good at it”?
a) Eric Lindros
b) Pavel Bure
c) Brett Hull
d) Mike Bossy
e) Jacques Plante
6) In the early 1950s, a young Maple Leaf named Les Costello abandoned a promising NHL career to become a priest. But Father Costello was far from finished with hockey. He formed a barnstorming hockey team of priests from all parts of Ontario. What was the name of this righteous squad?
a) The Holy Terrors
b) The Flying Fathers
c) The Sacred Order of Skaters
d) The 12 Disciples
e) The Fishers of Men
7) Joe Nieuwendyk, three-time winner of the Stanley Cup as a member of the Calgary Flames, Dallas Stars, and New Jersey Devils, once used the Cup itself as a rather unconventional receptacle. What did he put in it?
a) French fries and gravy
b) Geraniums
c) A tropical fish
d) Potpourri
e) Bridge mixture
8) Who is the only player to score twice in a 10-second span in an All-Star game?
a) Dennis Maruk, Washington Capitals
b) Dennis Hextall, Minnesota North Stars
c) Denis Savard, Chicago Blackhawks
d) Dennis Ververgaert, Vancouver Canucks
e) Dennis Hull, Chicago Black Hawks
9) Which TWO of the following teams were NOT in the World Hockey Association (1972–1979)?
a) Calgary Cowboys
b) Colorado Rockies
c) Denver Spurs
d) Houston Aeros
e) Kentucky Colonels
f) Quebec Nordiques
g) San Francisco SeaHawks
h) San Diego Mariners
10) Which of the following players NEVER won the Conn Smythe Trophy (awarded to the most valuable player of the Stanley Cup playoffs)?
a) Butch Goring
b) Jean-Sebastien Giguere
c) Stan Mikita
d) Jean Béliveau
e) Mark Messier
f) Roger Crozier
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THE GREAT UNCLE JOHN’S BATHROOM READER HOCKEY QUIZ — ANSWER KEY
1. c) California Golden Seals; 2. a) Dick Irvin; 3. a) Reveen the Hypnotist; 4. a) Sergei Priakin is Russian; b) Ivan Hlinka is Czech; c) Ivan Boldirev is Yugoslavian; d) Alexei Zhitnik is Ukrainian; e) Marion Gaborik is Slovakian; 5. c) Brett Hull 6. b) The Flying Fathers; 7. a) French fries and gravy; 8. d) Dennis Ververgaert, Vancouver Canucks; 9. b) Colorado Rockies & e) Kentucky Colonels; 10. c) Stan Mikita.
TIGER TALK
Random thoughts from former NHL tough guy Tiger Williams, who was as quick with a quote as he was to drop the gloves.
On the problem with some NHL tough guys of today: “As they mature as players and get used to the pro lifestyle, they kind of want to look like their bankbook. They want to be a little more dignified, but there’s no job for them in that area. They forget what got them there and they’re not around very long.”
On being a team enforcer: “Does anybody want that job? Anybody who says yes, you know the guy’s an idiot.”
On the Todd Bertuzzi-Steve Moore incident: “What I find interesting is that 200 people died in (terrorist) bombings in Spain and the biggest news story across Canada was Todd Bertuzzi. I think we need to get our priorities set straight as to what’s really important in life.”
On the way hockey players can get pigeonholed: “With a lot of great players, you’ll always hear the knock: ‘Well, defensively, he’s not any good.’ Do you know why? Because he doesn’t want it to be known that he’s any good at it. It’s by design. But for other guys, that’s not the way they are. If they’re asked to do something, they just do it. But unfortunately, they get pigeonholed and they stay there forever.”
On the penalty box at old Maple Leaf Gardens: “The box was kind of a gross place to go. The guys in there are bleeding and have bloody noses. They have greenies and yellows and drip all over the boards, and no one’s cleaned the place since 1938.”
On leading a personal charge against bylaws banning road hockey games in some Canadian cities: “We have to put a stop to this. We have to find out who these aliens are who dropped in on us with these bylaws and step on them. Squash them like a bug.”
EDDIE’S WILD RIDE
One road trip to Montreal was a nightmare for Boston’s great Eddie Shore.
COULD I BORROW YOUR LIMOUSINE?
Tales of defenceman Eddie Shore’s toughness and persistence fill hockey history books but topping the list is the yarn of one extraordinary trip from Beantown to Montreal. On January 2, 1929, a severe snowstorm had blanketed the eastern part of the continent and traffic problems in Boston caused Shore to miss the train taking the Bruins to Montreal for a game against the Maroons the next night. But Shore would not be stymied by the weather. At the railway station, he met a wealthy Bruins fan, who loaned his limousine and chauffeur to Shore for the trip.
THROUGH SLEET AND SNOW
The storm worsened with every mile when they managed to reach Vermont. But the driver abandoned the wheel when Shore refused to stop and hockey’s big star drove himself with the chauffeur as passenger. When the wipers stopped, Shore drove with his hand on the outside of the windshield, melting a spot to allow at least a small view of the road. The duo was forced to push the car back on the road several times when it skidded off. Just across the border in Quebec, when the limo went deep into a ditch in the dark night, Shore walked through waist-deep snow to a farmhouse and convinced the farmer to bring his team of horses to haul it out.
BUT HOW’D THE CAR LOOK?
At 6 p.m. on January 3, the car reached the hotel where the Bruins were just leaving for the arena to play the game. Shore’s hands were frost-bitten hooks from driving with the window open and his eyes were bloodshot because he had not slept. Bruins boss Art Ross told Shore to go to bed and show up the next morning for the train home but Shore insisted on playing. He ate a snack and caught a catnap in the trainers’ room, then played his usual 40 minutes against the tough, physical Maroons. The Bruins won the game, 1–0. Of course, Shore scored the only goal.
HEY KID, SUIT UP!
A geography test almost cost a university student his 15 minutes of NHL fame.
While Chris Levesque, a third-year student and third-string goaltender at the University of British Columbia, was studying in the library for his exam the following morning, the Vancouver Canucks were searching frantically for him to be an emergency fill-in between the pipes.
With the Pittsburgh Penguins in town to play on December 9, 2003, the Canucks were caught with their pants down after their number one goaltender Dan Cloutier injured his groin during the morning skate. Their minor league goaltenders were all traveling with their respective teams back east and couldn’t make it to Vancouver in time for the 7:08 P.M. start, leaving the Canucks with egg on their faces and no one to back up second stringer Johan Hedberg that night.
TO THE LIBRARY!
The Canucks first call was to the nearby UBC campus, but the team’s top two goalies were both ineligible under the NHL’s amateur emergency call-up rules, one because he was an undrafted European and the other, ironically, because he once played pro as a prospect in the Vancouver organization before giving up on his career and returning to school. That left the unlikely Levesque. The only problem was no one could find him.
Levesque had been given the day off from practice to cram for the geography exam at 8 a.m. the next morning and his roommates hadn’t seen or heard from him since he announced he was heading to the library to study. The UBC campus has more than a half-dozen libraries. “We had guys all over campus trying to find him,” UBC coach Milan Drajicevic said.
THIS IS A JOKE, RIGHT?
When teammates finally tracked down Levesque at 4:30 p.m., they had a hard time convincing the 23-year-old they weren’t playing a prank. Considering he hadn’t even started a university game—about five levels below the NHL—in almost three months and was sporting an unimpressive 0-4-1 record, 4.77 goals-against average and .855 save percentage with the Thunderbirds, it was hard to blame Levesque for his skepticism. “Actually, I thought the guy that found me was yanking my leg because we were talking about playing a prank like this on another guy about a week ago,” Levesque said.
After finally convincing him the surreal NHL call-up was for real, Levesque rushed to GM Place and, after getting the university sport governing body to sign off on a one-time release, signed a one-day amateur agreement with the Canucks. A couple of hours later he was on the ice wearing a No. 40 Vancouver jersey, taking warm-up shots from superstars Markus Naslund and Todd Bertuzzi, then settling into a spot at the end of the bench for what he assumed would be nothing more than a chance to get closer to the action than any of the other 18,622 spectators at GM Place that night. Instead, he almost got into the action.
PHEW! THAT WAS CLOSE
A violent collision with Penguins’ forward Konstantin Koltsov sent Hedberg’s mask flying down the ice and left the Canucks goaltender lying motionless while team medical staff rushed to his side. Cameras quickly zoomed in on a horrified Levesque on the bench, chewing his gum so hard it looked
like he too might soon need medical attention. To ease the tension, veteran Mike Keane yelled down the bench: “Don’t worry! He’ll get up.”
“I was a little frightened at first,” Levesque admitted after the game. “I tried to play it cool on the bench, just kept chewing my gum and looking up at the scoreboard with a camera right in my face. But luckily Hedberg wasn’t hurt seriously and he shook it off.”
REMEMBER, IT’S A SCHOOL NIGHT
Hedberg continued despite suffering a wrist injury in the collision and a relieved Levesque watched his new team come from behind to win the game 4–3 in overtime. Before he could escape back to campus to resume studying, Levesque had to face a media scrum bigger than the one in front of Naslund, the Canucks captain who scored all four of his team’s goals. “It’s a little different than after a UBC game where we just have one guy from the paper,” said Levesque, who grew up playing minor hockey in the nearby suburb of Port Coquitlam and spent some time in Manitoba’s junior-A league. “There’s like 40 people here.”
Levesque kept his No. 40 jersey and later received a “highlight film” of his gum-chewing exploits on the bench and massive post-game media scrum. As for the geography exam, Levesque, still wired from his six-hour study break in the NHL, hit the books into the wee hours of the morning and scored 88 percent.
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“We start out with goalies wearing masks. Every club has a defenceman or two who goes down to smother shots. Soon, they’ll want masks. All forwards will wear helmets. The teams will become faceless, headless robots all of whom look alike to the spectators. We can’t afford to take that fan appeal away from hockey.”
—Muzz Patrick, former New York Rangers defenceman