by Bea Paige
“Fern, you okay?” he mumbles, his hot breath warm against my skin.
I place my hand over his, holding his fingers still. “Shh, go back to sleep. You need rest, Mihr,” I say, soothing my hand against his. Mihr’s muscles relax almost instantly under my touch and he drifts off once more. I wish I could do the same, but I just feel wound up. Frustrated, I guess.
It seems entirely inappropriate, given the circumstances. But just as I have no control over my thoughts, it would seem that I have no control over my body either.
What is happening to me?
The pain in my back mixes with the pleasure as it swirls within my chest. It scares me, it thrills me. I don’t know what to do.
Then the pull of another connection forces the overwhelming feelings out of my head.
Ether is nearby.
I wonder whether the strength I suddenly feel is because he is near, or whether it is my own. Either way, it is enough to dampen these strange new feelings and allow me to concentrate on the here and now.
Unable to move beneath Gabe and Mihr’s wings without waking them, I wait until Ether enters the temple. He strides in, his arms full, then stops in the doorway, the pink light of Utero highlighting his white-blonde hair. Ether looks directly at me.
“You’re awake,” he says quietly, placing the large bag on the floor. He treads lightly towards me, his eyes flicking from Mihr to Gabe. “How are you doing?”
“My shoulders hurt, and my wings feel… stiff,” I say softly.
“Just stiff?”
“Okay, they hurt. I hurt. But I can take it, I think.”
“Do you want to get up?” he asks, approaching us. His gaze falls back on Mihr and Gabe, who are still sleeping, despite our conversation.
“I’m kind of trapped,” I say, with a light laugh.
“I can see that. Here, let me help you.”
Ether kneels and very gently, as though handling something precious, folds back Mihr’s wing. Mihr mumbles in his sleep, his wing wrapping around his body as he rolls away.
“One down,” Ether says, a small smile turning up the corner of his mouth.
He reaches over and slides his hand down the edge of Gabe’s wing. I watch in fascination as his masculine hand glides across the black velvet, tucking it against Gabe’s body. The act is incredibly sensual for some reason. I don’t know whether it is because of the way I’m feeling, the faraway look on Ether’s face or the way his hand lingers longer than necessary, but I can’t help but wonder whether there is more history between them than either lets on.
Ether catches me staring and pulls his hand away.
“Ready?” he asks, holding his hand out to me.
“As I’ll ever be.”
I place my hand in Ether’s and he pulls me to my feet. The pain in my back nearly makes me black out again and I grip hold of him tightly, gritting my mouth on the scream that threatens to erupt.
“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” he whispers against my cheek. “Just take your time. Hold on to me. I will support you.”
“Thank you, Ether,” I manage to say. I feel light-headed, nauseous. My spine is bending backwards under the weight, and my shoulders feel as though they are being pulled out of their sockets. Ether’s arms are holding me firmly around the waist, my own hands gripping onto his shoulders. I centre myself as much as possible, rolling my hips like I did yesterday now that I have a different centre of gravity.
“You need to train your body to stand differently. You will keep toppling over if you don’t, or worse, snap your spine,” he says, reading my mind.
“I feel that.”
He pulls back slightly, his hands holding me steady. “What you did yesterday was remarkable. I’ve never seen anyone hold their wings like you did the first time.”
“No?”
“No. Your strength is impressive.” He catches my eye and I see pride in them. He slides one hand around my back and under my wings, whilst the other lays flat against my stomach.
“You need to activate the muscles in your core. They will support your spine, which will in turn support your wings. You already have strength here, just not quite enough yet.” His fingers flex against my stomach, and I feel my top sliding forward down my shoulders. Any second now, it’s going to fall off. Ether notices, removing his hand and pulling my top up. It’s a sweet gesture, but part of me wants to let it fall, see what would happen then.
“We need to sort this clothing problem out,” he mumbles.
“What do you suggest? I brought nothing with me, not that they will fit over these wings anyway. How do you all manage?”
“We’ve had a thousand years to perfect our clothing. Tillan gave me some of hers, they are designed to accommodate wings. Let me help you to the wall, you can lean against it while I fetch you a top,” Ether says, guiding me across the room. Behind us, Mihr and Gabe are still out cold.
“You went to see her while we were sleeping?” Even to my own ears, my voice sounds a little off, jealous. I grip hold of Ether, my arm looped around his back and under his wings. His feathers glide across my skin and I try not to moan with pleasure.
“Yes, I did. I needed some advice. She also has amazing tonics which should help you cope over the next week or so. While I was there she gave me some of her clothes to give to you. She cares about you, Fern, and she’s my friend, our friend, okay?” he says gently, trying to reassure me.
“Of course she is.”
Ether helps me to lean against the wall, his hands steadying me at the waist. My fingers curl into fists as my wings press against the cold stone, the newly formed bones in my shoulders and wings screaming with agony at the strange pressure of my body weight leaning against them.
“How’s that? Do you think you can stand for a moment while I grab a top?” Ether asks. His hands have moved lower down, sitting comfortably on my hips. The heat I feel coming from them is distracting.
“Yes, I can do that,” I say, forcing myself to concentrate on holding my core muscles strong, locking my knees in place and trying to ignore the heat spiralling in my stomach.
“Okay, good.” Ether removes his hands. I let out an involuntary whimper. Not because I am in a huge amount of pain, but because I miss his touch. I want it. Immediately, his hands fly back to my waist.
“Fern?”
“I’m fine, really. You can let go.” My voice trembles, giving me away. I would kick myself if I thought I wouldn’t fall over doing it.
“You don’t sound fine to me. If you’re hurt, you must tell me. I can’t help you if you’re not truthful.” His brows pull together as his eyes rove over my body, as though trying to figure out what to do. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
Truthful, okay. I can do that. I think.
“I feel odd.”
“Well, that’s not unusual, given the circumstances.”
“No, I suppose it isn’t…”
“But?”
“But it’s more than that. I feel different…”
Ether looks at me as though I’m stupid, or at least a little dense. “You are different,” he says slowly, as though talking to a child.
“No, that’s not what I mean.” I sigh, a little exasperated.
“I’m sorry. That was unhelpful. Please, tell me.” Ether tightens his grip, his fingers scorching my skin, making it even more difficult to concentrate.
“Do you feel it too? This connection?”
After a beat, Ether nods his head. “Yes, I feel it.”
“Is it part of the prophecy, the Harmonious bond?” Ether opens his mouth to speak but I continue, needing to get the words out before I lose my courage. “I should be more afraid. I should be scared about what having these wings means. I know what you all have to do to stay alive, and though I am frightened that I will have do the same, that isn’t my most pressing concern.”
“It’s not?”
“No,” I whisper.
“Then what is it?” Ether asks gently.
“It’s t
hese feelings I have for all of you. They are overwhelming, far more than these wings are.”
“Feelings? As in emotions or physical?”
“Both.” I glance over at the sleeping Gabe and Mihr, then back at Ether. My heart constricts as a warm heat moves towards that tiny nub of nerve endings below. My cheeks flush. God help me, I am strung tighter than a coil. I am horny, yes. But it’s more than that, more than wanting to have sex. I feel this almost vicarial need to connect completely with all three of them. Sex, I think, is part of it, but not all of it. Three sharp tugs pull in my chest, each of them connecting me to my angels, reminding me of the bond we share even though I don’t completely understand it.
Mine.
“I feel territorial, Ether. I have this pressing need just to be close to you all, in every way. I don’t understand it. My mind should be focusing on the problems I’m having now. I should be in pieces. I should be panicking. But right now, I have an itch that needs scratching. I think I might go mad if it isn’t.”
“An itch?” Ether looks as confused as I feel. For a smart man, he’s a bit slow on the uptake.
“Am I supposed to feel like this?” I ask, pressing my thighs together in a futile attempt to provide relief. “It’s torturous.”
“Fern, you’re going to have to spell it out for me.”
“I need release, Ether.” I press my fingers against my eyes and lean my head back against the cold wall. Once I’ve calmed my racing heart enough I lock eyes with Ether. “I need to come.” There, I said it.
“You’re thinking of sex, now?” Ether says, his voice low. Controlled. It’s not helping me to not think about sex.
“You wanted the truth…” I bite my lip. Hard. The heat from his hands is scorching. My brain is zeroing in on his touch and the warmth between my legs.
“Life damn it, Fern. You know how to unhinge a guy, don’t you?” Ether laughs, some of the tension leaving his face. I shrug my shoulders helplessly. Then wince as a shooting pain ricochets down my spine.
“It’s uncomfortable…” I start, not sure how to explain myself.
“The pain will ease over time, Fern.”
“No. I don’t mean my wings. I mean, feeling this way. Feeling wired. It’s verging on painful, a different kind of pain to the one in my back. I can’t think straight. It’s not helping the situation,” I whisper. I can’t believe I am telling him this. The Fern of old would never have dreamed of being so forward, but I trust Ether. I trust all of them.
Ether blows out a long breath, then stares me straight in the eye. My own breath catches at the flames I see burning there.
“Okay,” he says.
“Okay what?”
“You need release, I shall give it to you.”
“You will?” I squeak. “What about Gabe and Mihr?”
“You want to wait until they wake up?” he asks, as though that’s a perfectly normal request.
Does he mean to suggest a foursome? “No, no, I think it will be fine with just you. Erm, I don’t mean that in a horrible way. Of course, I want their… attention. I meant what I said earlier, I’m drawn to all of you. It’s, well, I’m not sure if I’m ready for that just yet… Is that normal here? Do you usually all have sex in groups.” My words come out in a heated rush. I drop my head in embarrassment.
Ether’s laughter has Gabe and Mihr stirring. He clamps his mouth shut, the mirth reaching his eyes.
“You’re rambling, Fern,” he chuckles, lifting my chin with his finger.
“It’s good to know I keep you amused,” I huff, but I’m not truly annoyed. This Ether, the one he’s showing me now, is someone I could get used to.
“Hey, I was kidding.”
“This isn’t easy for me, Ether. But I will be truthful, even if it’s hard. Even if I sound like a moron.”
“Then I shall be truthful in return.” He shifts on his feet, his wings spread out slightly behind his back. They fascinate me.
“In answer to your earlier question, our people make love all the time. With one partner, with more. It’s about the only thing, apart from flying, that keeps us from going insane. Fortunately, the curse of bringing death with just a touch doesn’t apply between members of our clan. Sex is about one of the only pleasures we have. Taking life is draining, physically, emotionally, mentally. Having sex, connecting with someone, even only briefly, helps. The majority of Clan Vitae make love regularly, and often.”
“The majority?”
“It has been a while since I’ve touched a woman, Fern. For Mihr it has been a lot longer. You know about Gabe and his past transgressions. Although it has been years for him now too. So, when you ask if it’s just as torturous for me, for us, the answer is yes. Yes, it is.”
My heart beats like a jack-hammer in my chest as Ether steps closer. “So, what happens now?” I whisper, knowing full well what I want to happen.
“Now? Now, I make you come.”
Chapter Six
I choke back my almost hysterical laugh and glance over at Gabe and Mihr. “What about them, won’t they wake up?”
“If they do, would it make you uncomfortable if they watched?” he asks, a wicked glint in his eye.
“I don’t know, it might,” I say honestly. Kissing them all in front of each other is one thing. Doing more, whilst others watch on, is quite another.
Ether nods, seemingly making a decision. “You won’t find release if you feel self-conscious.” He bends down slightly, one arm firm around my back, the other behind my knees, then he lifts me. I wince as my wings fall backwards, dragging along the floor.
“Sorry,” Ether says.
“I can walk, you know,” I say with a light laugh.
Ether raises an eyebrow. “I know that. This isn’t for your benefit. This is for mine. I don’t want to waste a second.” His jaw grits, and I know this feeling of being on the edge and wanting is as real for him as it is for me.
“Where are we going?” I ask, my voice thick with lust.
“There is a small ante-chamber at the back of the temple. It will give us some privacy.”
“Privacy, got it,” I mumble, my brain no longer keeping up with my body. I can feel the heat of his bare forearm pressing against my uncovered back. My top has fallen much lower at the front, determined to show off the roundness of my breasts. I lift my hand to pull it upwards but am stopped by Ether’s glare.
“Don’t,” he orders.
Within a few strides we have entered the room and Ether kicks the door shut behind him. There is a small window allowing light into the space, casting the room in a dusky pink glow. He kneels, laying me gently on the floor. I suck in a sharp breath through my teeth at the ache in my back. An ache which is in stark contrast to the one I feel between my legs.
What have I become?
I don’t get to ponder it any further as Ether straddles me, his firm arse resting lightly on my thighs. Behind him, his wings unfurl slightly, like a ship at half-mast. My hands fly upwards before my brain can catch up, and I tug on his top.
“Take it off,” I order.
Ether’s lip lifts at the corner. “Yes, Mistress,” he says playfully.
“Mistress? I like the sound of that.”
Ether’s eyes darken with lust. “There is no power play here, Fern. I will give you myself, all of me. Be my equal, match me, master me in every way and I will do so in return. Can you do that?”
I regard him for a moment, my fist clutching onto his top like it had earlier. The heat pouring from his skin is intense, but not as much as the fire engulfing the connection between us. The answer is an easy one.
“Yes,” I say, yanking hard on his top so Ether unbalances and falls forward. His hands rest either side of my head as a low chuckle escapes his throat.
“Yes, what?”
Now it’s my turn to smile. “Yes, Master.”
Before the last syllable has left my mouth, Ether’s lips have crashed against my own. He doesn’t kiss me slow like Mihr and it doesn’
t feel ice-cold and dangerous like Gabe’s. No, Ether’s kiss is like fire. It’s passionate and exciting and bordering on desperate. His lips scorch against my skin whilst his tongue spears my mouth. The thundering of my pulse and the sound of my muffled groans are loud even to my ears.
Ether pulls away briefly to yank at my top, freeing my breasts. My nipples pebble at the sudden rush of cold air and the heat building between my legs.
“Life damn it, Fern,” he growls, staring down at my naked chest.
“Ether, don’t just look at me,” I groan, my own desperation making me impatient. These out of control feelings I have need to be satiated. I can’t think straight. I feel edgy, odd.
“You are bare, I think we need to even the score,” he says, pulling at his top. I hear material ripping and a second later he is topless like me. Behind him, his wings unfurl a little further.
My hands fly upwards to his stomach, roaming over the tattoo I’ve longed to touch since I first saw it. My fingertips search upwards and out over the firm muscle and warm skin of his chest until they claw at his shoulders.
“Kiss me again,” I order, all inhibitions gone now. The Fern I knew before would never have been so forward, but I can’t seem to help myself.
“Then what?” he asks. “You need to tell me what you want.”
“I want what you promised, Ether.”
“And what is that? Tell me what you need from me.” His whole body is trembling as he waits. My fingertip traces a line along his jaw and to his parted lips. I press it gently against his mouth.
“I want your mouth on every inch of my skin, I want your fingers inside me. I want more. I want release, but most of all I want you.” The thread in my chest, the one that belongs to Ether, pulls gently. Fire zings along it, scorching my insides.
He smiles languidly, his gaze moving between my lips and my breasts. Then, bending down, his white-blond hair falling forward, Ether places a kiss against the spot in my chest where I can feel the connection.
The fire burns brighter as he trails his lips and tongue up the centre of my chest, following the blaze as it moves with him. The heat spreads out from the centre of my chest and ripples beneath my skin, building an inferno inside of me. Ether slides his mouth up my neck, gently tugging on my ear with his teeth. I turn my head, desperate now for him to kiss me. He hovers over me, eyes open, looking down at me as I look up at him. Then he gently presses his lips against mine as my hands wrap around him, pulling him closer.