Far From Home

by Anne Bennett

  ‘How dare you talk to me like that?’ the woman said, affronted. She turned to her husband and said, ‘Are you going to let him speak to me like that?’

  In the presence of a very angry young man, Gillian’s father was silent. ‘And have you no control over your son’s insolence?’ she asked Mary.

  ‘None whatsoever,’ Mary answered mildly. ‘So, that being the case, I would do as he says.’

  ‘You can’t do this,’ the woman cried. ‘This is my daughter’s wedding day.’

  ‘That daughter is also my wife,’ Derek said in a voice as cold as ice. ‘As such, she is under my protection, and I would ask anyone to leave who was upsetting her, regardless of who they were. So far, the only ones who have done so are you and your husband, and so you either leave peaceably or I may feel obliged to help you.’

  Kate felt like giving Derek a big round of applause, because she saw the man, unnerved by Derek’s resolute stance and eyes still smouldering in temper, was already on his feet. When he strode out of the room, arm in arm with his wife and with all the dignity he could muster, an audible sigh of relief ran round the room.

  The chatter began again, Frank ferreted through the records and soon ‘Chattanooga Choo Choo’ was belting out from the gramophone and the dancers took to the floor again. Under cover of the music, Kate said, ‘Derek, you were magnificent.’

  ‘I agree,’ said Mary. ‘I wanted to cheer.’

  ‘So did I,’ Kate said with a grin. ‘Or clap, or something.’

  ‘Thank goodness you didn’t,’ Derek said. ‘That wouldn’t have helped matters.’

  ‘That just shows how circumspect we can be,’ Mary said. ‘And now I will go and have a well-earned drink and check that all our other guests are all right.’

  When Mary had gone, Derek said to Kate, ‘I didn’t feel magnificent, I just felt angry and flabbergasted that anyone would behave that way. You know I’m not at all sure that that pair love Gillian, but they want to control her all right. I went through the mill when we were courting. She had never been out with anyone before and she was frightened of her own shadow. And the limitations they laid on her, ridiculous times for her to be home because they went to bed early, and if she ever disobeyed them, she would find herself locked out. Not that she ever did disobey them; she bent over backwards to please them and I sometimes doubted we would ever make it down the aisle. ‘But now,’ he said, scanning the room, ‘I can’t see her. She might be upset because it was her parents I verbally attacked, after all. All I could think of was her so upset and that I had to do something about it. She might be hiding out in the Ladies’. Kate, will you check for me?’

  ‘Course I will,’ Kate said, and there she found Gillian with a tear-trailed crimson face and red-rimmed swollen eyes. The tears had stopped now, but she had cried for so long that sobs still shook her frame. Kate took her in her arms as she said, ‘I don’t know how you can bear to look at me.’

  ‘What are you on about?’

  ‘Everyone will think I’m stupid.’

  ‘They will think nothing of a sort.’

  ‘They’ll think Derek a fool to marry me.’

  ‘They won’t at all,’ Kate said. ‘But do you know, it wouldn’t matter if they did, because Derek doesn’t and he is the one that matters. I told you my parents didn’t approve of my marriage, but we are not letting their opinion spoil our lives.’

  ‘You’re right,’ Gillian said, pulling herself out of Kate’s arms. ‘This has decided me,’ she said, turning to Kate. ‘Two of the girls I work with have husbands in the Forces, and they have rented this three-bedroomed house in Witton, not far from work. They offered me a place in it where I would have a double bedroom and shared use of the house and I turned it down.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Why d’you think?’ Gillian said with a sigh. ‘I thought it would be too much of a shock for my parents; my getting married and moving out straight away might be too much for them to cope with, and I thought I would stay at home for a bit. But I see now that that is not going to work and so, if the room is available, I will take it, and if not I will look for something else. After their performance today, I don’t want to live with them ever again.’

  ‘No one will blame you for that,’ Kate said. ‘In fact, someone not so far away would be delighted to hear it, and he is the one so worried about you he sent me into the Ladies’ to see if you were here. I imagine he is pacing the floor outside. Why don’t you go out to him now and take charge of your new life together?’

  ‘I will, yes, I will, and thank you, Kate.’

  ‘God,’ Kate said to Susie later. ‘I thought my parents were bad enough.’

  ‘I know, and I can’t understand why certain people think they are better than others.’

  ‘Nor me,’ said Kate.

  ‘My wedding will be different,’ Susie said. ‘Tell you that for nothing.’

  ‘Mm,’ said Kate. ‘Probably have to be a bit of a rush job, won’t it?’

  ‘Yes, my parents know this and also know that is partly their fault for putting obstacles in the way when we did have a little bit more time,’ Susie said.

  ‘See, it’s parents again,’ Kate said with a smile. ‘They’re the very devil, parents.’

  ‘I’ll say,’ Susie said. ‘But I think a lot of weddings will have to be a bit rushed now; the priest said as much and he’s put himself on standby.’

  ‘Isn’t he bothered that Nick is a non-Catholic?’

  ‘Not really,’ Susie said. ‘Maybe being at war and Nick in the Air Force makes a difference. He knows how we feel about one another and, like I said, he is on standby.’

  ‘Hmm,’ Kate mused. ‘I somehow don’t think that Father Patterson would see it that way.’

  ‘Has he said anything to you then?’

  ‘No, but he doesn’t know, does he?’ Kate said. ‘I make sure that he sees me at Mass, but me and Sally duck out early before he can notice the wedding ring on my finger and ask awkward questions.’

  ‘Don’t you think it mad that we should be so worried about a priest’s reaction?’ Susie said. ‘Nick can’t understand it, and I am no good explaining it because I don’t fully understand it myself.’

  ‘It’s conditioning,’ Kate said. ‘It was drummed into us for years and we obeyed, even when we didn’t know the real reason why, like not being able to attend a service in another church, so you can’t go to a Protestant friend’s wedding or show your respects at a funeral. Why is that?’

  Susie shrugged. ‘Maybe they’d think we’d be corrupted. But you’re right. It is a crazy rule.’

  ‘And why can’t we eat meat on Friday and must fast before we can take communion? There are loads of things I don’t understand, but my mother told me that I shouldn’t question the Mother Church when I asked for explanations about things.’

  ‘You are so right,’ Susie said. ‘I’m asked questions about my religion sometimes and I always feel silly for not knowing the answers.’

  ‘Just for now though,’ said Kate, ‘I am going along with everything because I need the Almighty to be listening and on my side when I am praying for David. He needs support from somewhere. He gets precious little from his family.’

  Later that evening, back in her flat, she reflected on how much support she received from her own parents. They were a distance away, but even so. They had two daughters living in a country that was at war, one with her husband in the RAF and the other with her boyfriend in the Army, and her mother hadn’t even begun to understand or sympathize with how either of them might be feeling. Far from it; in fact, she seemed only to care about the marriage to David that she refused to recognize, sending letters full of vitriolic rants.

  Life limped along wearily. Nothing seemed to be happening in terms of the war, except that meat had been added to the ration and most of the evacuated children had returned home. Then, towards the end of March, Susie received the letter she had been waiting for. Nick and David had leave and would be arriving on
21 March. Kate scanned the letter Susie had given her at the tram stop and said, ‘Will you fit a wedding in? They have to be back on the twenty-fourth.’

  ‘I know,’ Susie said, ‘that’s why everything must be in place. Mom’s going round to see the priest today and I’m going down the Bull Ring on Saturday to see what I can find to wear. D’you want to come? We’ll have to find something for you too because I want you as my matron of honour.’

  ‘Oh, Susie,’ Kate cried. ‘You couldn’t have pleased me more. You just try to stop me going to the Bull Ring with you. Budget wedding or not, you want to look nice for your man and I wouldn’t trust you out on your own.’

  ‘Cheek,’ Susie said, but she took Kate’s hand as she spoke and gave it a squeeze.

  Susie’s happiness shone out of her that day at work and infected all around. They were all pleased for her. ‘Got to snatch at every bit of happiness,’ one woman said to her. ‘And try and hold on to it tight, because life is too short to do anything else. That matters even more in wartime, so God bless the two of you, I say.’

  ‘Yes,’ said another, ‘I think that goes for us all.’

  ‘I’ll say it does,’ said a third. ‘I pity you young ones trying to get married and everything with this war hanging over us, and Madge is right: you have to take what happiness you can.’

  ‘My mother’s not too happy about it,’ Susie said. ‘Is she, Kate?’

  ‘Well no,’ Kate said. ‘But she has more or less accepted it now, hasn’t she?’

  Susie shrugged. ‘Sort of,’ she said. ‘But I know she is struggling with it.’

  ‘Don’t they like the feller?’ one of the younger girls asked.

  ‘Oh, no,’ Susie said. ‘They like Nick well enough.’

  ‘Then I don’t see the problem.’

  ‘I think,’ said Kate, ‘they are trying to save Susie further heartache.’

  ‘Every mother in the land would like to do that for their children,’ said an older woman. ‘I know I would.’

  ‘And me and all,’ another agreed. ‘Only you can’t, can you? They have to learn from their own mistakes.’

  ‘Anyway,’ Kate said, ‘Susie won’t love Nick any more or less, whether she marries him or not. My sister is engaged to a chap that she would marry tomorrow if she could, and she loves him with a passion. She would be heartbroken if anything happened to him.’

  ‘I can see that,’ the first woman said as they made their way to the factory floor. ‘Marriage will make no difference at all.’

  ‘Well, let’s hope that it’s not put to the test,’ another said. ‘May God be with the pair of you too, anyway,’ she said as she nodded at Susie.

  It was as they made their way home that night that Kate asked Susie if she was having any sort of honeymoon. She shook her head. ‘Not really, though Dad’s trying to get us a couple of nights in a nice hotel,’ she said. ‘It will have to be somewhere local, with Nick due back on the air base on Friday, but it will be nice just to be together.’

  ‘Yes, of course it will,’ Kate said, getting to her feet as their stop was next. ‘I am so happy for you both.’

  They alighted from the tram and Susie suddenly threw her arms around Kate and said, ‘I can’t believe I am actually getting married.’

  Kate laughed at her friend’s exuberance as she disentangled herself, but held on to both her hands as she said, ‘And tomorrow we’ll buy the clothes for that wedding. Don’t worry we’ll have you dressed to kill.’

  ‘I’d rather be dressed for love,’ Susie said.

  ‘Oh,’ said Kate, with a broad smile, ‘you get undressed if you want to indulge in that sort of caper. And ideally everything has to come off. Nakedness is the name of the game.’

  A lady walking past overheard what Kate had said and both girls saw the outrage in her face in the dusky half-light. ‘Girls! Really!’ she snapped, and they barely waited until she was out of earshot before they burst into gales of laughter.

  Susie found just the thing for her wedding in the Rag Market, which was vibrant and busy, as it was every Saturday, the air filled with the cries of the stallholders shouting their wares and a pervading smell of fish because the Rag Market was also the Fish Market on weekdays. Normally, the girls would wander around having a good look at all the things for sale, but that day they were in too much of a hurry to find suitable clothes for the wedding.

  ‘Oh, look,’ cried Susie suddenly as they thumbed through the rails of one stall. She pulled out a cream dress and looked at the label on the back. ‘Would you believe it’s my size,’ she said, and isn’t it just gorgeous?’

  ‘Oh, yes,’ Kate said, for the dress was cream silk with frills down the fitted bodice and lace at the neck and the skirt embroidered with designs in a deeper lemon. It fell in soft folds to mid-calf; there was a jacket of the same material and similarly embroidered, fitted to the waist, which went down over the hips. ‘Oh, I never thought I would find anything like this,’ Susie said. ‘I thought I would have to settle for something frightful because I am so fat.’

  ‘Susie, you are not fat,’ Kate objected.

  ‘I’m fatter than you.’

  ‘That wouldn’t be difficult,’ the stallholder said, overhearing the conversation. ‘Your friend is very slender.’

  ‘Skinny is the word,’ Kate said.

  ‘Not at all,’ the stallholder insisted. ‘A skinny person hasn’t got the good figure you have. But your friend with the fuller figure is just as attractive, and this dress shows her bust off perfectly.’ She turned to Susie as she spoke and said, ‘I presume that this outfit is for a special occasion?’

  ‘Just about the most special ever in my life,’ Susie said, and added with a little flush of pride, ‘Wednesday will be my wedding day. My husband-to-be is a pilot and he has a seventy-two-hour pass so that we can marry.’

  The news rippled around the Market Hall, and when Susie said that her friend, Kate, was already married to a pilot and that she was going to be her matron of honour, the stallholders seemed to be on a mission to dress the girls to the nines. Nothing was too much trouble. They decided to dress the bride first. ‘Navy is the thing to wear with that colour cream,’ said one.

  ‘Are you sure?’ Susie said, looking at the navy court shoes the stallholder was holding that had higher heels than she had ever attempted to wear before. ‘You don’t think navy a trifle stark?’

  ‘Not a bit of it,’ the stallholder said, brushing away her concerns. ‘Trust me, my dear, these are the height of fashion, and I have a bag just the same shade.’

  ‘She’ll need a hat,’ said another.

  ‘Yes,’ said the first, surveying Susie as she teetered slightly in the unfamiliar shoes. ‘But nothing with a wide brim, I don’t think. It would swamp her face.’

  Susie had her hair curled up into a bun on the back of her head and another stallholder cried, ‘I have just the thing,’ and produced a cloche hat with a feather in the side and a veil that she could wear down or up. It fitted beautifully over her hair.

  ‘Go and put it all on, my dear,’ the first stallholder said, and she pushed a packet into Susie’s hand. ‘Oh, silk stockings!’ Susie said.

  ‘Yes, and they are a present from me, and your friend will have the same.’

  ‘Oh, no, really,’ Kate said, and the stallholder held up her hand.

  ‘No, you must accept this small gift,’ she said. ‘You just look after those men of yours, that’s all I ask, and I think I speak for us all.’

  There was murmur of agreement, and she urged Susie, ‘Go and put it all on, my dear.’

  Susie disappeared behind the curtain and the stallholder grinned at Kate. ‘Now, your turn, my dear,’ she said, and Kate was suddenly touched by the kindness of these rough-and-ready stallholders.

  ‘A girl with your figure is easy to dress,’ the stallholder went on. ‘And I have just the thing.’ She drew from the rail a black silken dress with swirls of white and grey, again fitted to the waist with quite heavy lace
along the neckline and the same on the cuffs. ‘It looks better on,’ she told Kate. ‘It doesn’t look much on the rail.’

  ‘Yes,’ said Kate, taking it from her. ‘I know what you mean. Some dresses you just have to try on. But what accessories, and d’you think black a little severe for a wedding?’

  ‘Um, maybe all black,’ the stallholder said. ‘But the swirls make all the difference, and if you had grey accessories …’

  ‘Oh, yes, grey would be good,’ put in another. ‘I have some lovely shoes here that would go a treat.’

  However, before the shoes could be produced, Susie stepped from behind the curtain. There was a gasp of admiration from the stallholders and Kate even saw some of them surreptitiously wipe a trickling tear away. Susie looked so lovely. The cream costume could have been made for her and the stallholders were right, Kate thought, the navy accessories made the whole outfit. No one spoke for a second or two and Susie began to feel nervous. ‘Will I do?’ she asked, and Kate exclaimed, ‘Do? I’d say you’ll more than just do. Wait until Nick catches sight of you.’

  ‘See for yourself,’ the stallholder said, pulling a full-length mirror from behind the stall. ‘Oh,’ Susie said, for the reflection didn’t even look like her. It looked far too glamorous, and she looked around at them all, her face one beam of happiness.

  ‘There you are,’ Kate said. ‘You look absolutely terrific and I would give you a hug, but I might crush something.’

  Susie looked at Kate and her eyes were very bright and her voice a little choked as she said, ‘You are just about the best friend a girl could ever have.’ Then she looked around the satisfied stallholders and said, ‘And thank you all so much. Now can you help find something for Kate?’

  ‘I have the dress already,’ Kate said, holding it aloft. ‘Just the accessories to choose.’

  They were chosen, and soon Kate was in the dress, which showed off her slender shape to perfection. She also wore silk stockings, grey court shoes and she carried a grey handbag and had a cloche hat similar to Susie’s, which was black with a grey trim, the colours complementing Susie’s outfit perfectly.