The Takedown

by Corrie Wang

  Of all the girls, Audra stayed over the most. Prior to this fall, when the numbers had inexplicably, or now not so inexplicably, reduced, it hadn’t been unusual for her to sleep over three or more times a week. Sometimes, like when she complained that we were having cereal for breakfast again, having Audra over got on my family’s nerves. But never mine. Anyone whose family was so terrible they didn’t even want to sleep in their own bed—my favorite place on earth—deserved a little leeway.

  Tonight I had no such sympathies.

  “So when were you going to tell me you’re the Bra&Panties slut?”

  Our refrigerator was a side-by-side model. Audra stooped down to look through the bottom shelves of the freezer even though she only ever wanted blueberry gelato. It was the only reason my mom bought it. Her back stiffened, but she nonchalantly grabbed the deep-blue pint container, as if I hadn’t spoken. Stepping around me, she took a spoon from the drawer next to the sink, then hoisted herself up onto the counter. Her heels lightly tapped the cupboards below as she said, “I didn’t think the future president of the United States would understand her kind of entrepreneurial—”

  “‘Her’?” I cut her off. “‘Her’ who? You are her. This is why you always keep your Doc on private. Why you never sleep over anymore and always have unelaborated ‘plans.’ This is where all your money comes from. You sell pictures of your boobs and tush, to what? Buy shoes?”

  Audra dug out an enormous scoop of gelato and took a tiny bite.

  “Please, Kyle.” She licked her lips. “You’re seventeen. It’s time for you to say tits and ass like the big kids. And, yes, you’ve got me all figured out. I just couldn’t stand not shopping enough.”

  “So then why do it?”

  “Why should I tell you?” She slammed down the gelato, launched herself off the counter, and shouldered past me to grab a juice box from the fridge.

  “Because I thought I was your best friend.”

  Audra jabbed at the juice box until the flimsy straw broke. She set them both on the counter.

  Without looking at me, she said, “The New Year’s Eve reveal should net me close to five hundred thousand dollars. The countdown clock alone, at fifty thousand purchases at two ninety-nine apiece, has earned me a hundred and fifty thousand. That Vogue.com thing I was telling you about? It’s real. They want me to start in February. What’s all this for? It’s for never again letting a douche like Cobi Watkins have power over my body and image. Or anyone else’s, for that matter.”

  I knew Boobgate had scarred my friend, but becoming the queen of nudie pics as a response? It was either the most brilliant or most misguided way of dealing with boyfriend betrayal that I’d ever heard of. Leave it to Audra, I guess. Girl never did anything small.

  “And it’s for never ever having to ask the Parents for another dime for as long as I live. I know it’s hard for you to understand, coming from your perfect family, Kylie, but living the rest of my life independent and free of my parents is the only future goal I have right now. I already have a down payment on an apartment in Williamsburg. I’m moving there as soon as school’s over.”

  AnyLiesUnmade. It was all lies. This hadn’t been going on for just a few weeks. B&P had started almost ten months ago. That meant nearly a third of our friendship had involved Audra keeping a huge secret from me. And not unintentionally. I thought of all the times her Doc had been set to private when we were together. Feeling light-headed, I slid down and sat on the floor.

  “You’re moving to Williamsburg?”

  I knew Audra had been more withdrawn and short-fused since the summer, but it wasn’t that out of character for her; I’d thought she was just getting anxious about graduation. Whenever I asked what she was planning to do with her gap year—travel, intern, volunteer—she’d shrug and say she hadn’t decided and leave it at that. Pressing her on it never seemed worth the nasty ripples it created in our day-to-day.

  Never mind that she was the B&P chick. I txted Audra when I couldn’t decide if I should buy a new blouse. Meanwhile, she’d been apartment hunting without me.

  “I tried to tell you a bunch of times,” Audra continued. “Life would have been a whole lot easier these last couple months if I could have. But every time I tested the waters, you, like, created a tsunami of hate toward her. And I get it. You’re the leader of every club at our school. You say you’re going to be president, and I believe you. You won’t even date the hottest, most interesting catch at Prep because he has a history that isn’t as squeaky-clean as yours—”

  “That isn’t the only reason why I won’t date Mac,” I interjected halfheartedly.

  “—so you can’t be mad at me for not seeing how you could ever comprehend a project like this. Sorry I checked out on you the last few days, but we’ve been shooting for the New Year’s reveal. I’ve never been so stressed in my life. I just couldn’t handle both our dramas at the same time.”

  It was like my best friend was a stranger. If her big reveal hadn’t been coming up, if all this junk hadn’t been going on with my hater, would I have found out about B&P at all? Or would I only have found out after the reveal, along with the rest of the world?

  “Aren’t you gonna say anything? Come on, Kylie, lay into me already.” Audra slid the gelato and spoon down the counter to me. When I didn’t reach up to take them, she said, “Did I mention that B&P earns me enough money to buy way awesome clothes? Come on, laugh. That was a joke.”

  “I can smell the drama from upstairs. Who burned the toast?”

  Fawn’s bare feet smacked lightly on the floor. She looked like another person when she was tired. Her eyes turned down at the corners; her whole face got puffy.

  “Kyle knows about B&P,” Audra said.

  “Geez, it took you long enough.” Fawn yawned.

  In the third grade, Aubrey Torr-Jones accidentally punched me in the stomach during a PE volleyball game. I remembered all the air rushing out of me, and for a split second panicking because I couldn’t bring any back in. This felt exactly like that.

  Fawn eyed Audra’s pint. She grabbed a spoon from the drawer and padded over to the freezer.

  “I so sleepy. Need sugar. Got anything other than blueberry? Chocolate peanut butter, maybe?”

  “You know too?” I whispered.

  Fawn’s eyes cut to Audra. “Aw, uh-oh, worried face. Yeah, but only because Audy needed help. I mean, who else do you think would be dumb enough to ride a horse in Prospect Park in her undies? I totally expected you to recognize me months ago. It’s why I kept sending you so many links. I mean, I know this doesn’t make up for it, but I’m buying a Peddler, one of those self-guiding bicycles, with all the money Audra paid me. Zoom, zoom.”

  Fawn knelt next to me and gave me a hug. When I remained unresponsive, she reluctantly got up and went back to digging around in the freezer. I was doing my best to choke back a sob as Sharma came in.

  “Was messaging one of your maybe haters that also plays Z-Wars. Said nitrogen gun exists. Stashed in a safe in the principal’s office. Comes with a hammer so you freeze the zombie’s head and then…” Her words fell off when she saw my face. “What now?”

  I didn’t even bother to ask if Sharma knew. Of course she did. Who else would have helped Audra set everything up?

  From deep inside our freezer, Fawn said, “Kyle knows about B&P.”

  Sharma went to the snack cupboard and pulled down a bag of snap-pea crisps. She popped one in her mouth and crunched loudly.

  “Good. It’s about time. Kyle, you okay? How bad equals your freak-out?”

  My eyes filled with tears. “So I’m the friend my friends have to keep secrets from. Do you know how crazy that makes me feel?”

  “We know how crazy it makes you look.”

  Fawn pulled her Doc from the waistband of her pj’s and snapped my pic, then held it up for my perusal. I shoved the Doc away.

  “Who’s the third girl in the pictures?”

  It wasn’t Sharma, and it certainly wasn
’t me. Fawn and Audra exchanged glances. Audra shook her head no.

  “I’m sitting right here. I can see you, Audra Bethany Rhodes. Who’s the third girl?”

  She shrugged, in a have it your way gesture.

  “Fine, betch, it’s Ailey. Sorry. I know how much it bothers you that she and I have become friends. Even though you’ve blown me off to not screw around with Mac for the last four months and I never once held that against you.

  “And for the record, maybe you’re hurt I didn’t tell you about all this, but at least I never doubted your loyalty. Did I stick up for you when I found out my dad voted to have you suspended? We only fought about it for two hours. And how do you think it makes me feel that he still went ahead and did what he wanted? Thanks for the vote of confidence, friend.”

  Tears filled her eyes.

  “Audra. Kylie,” Fawn said. “Come on, ladies, don’t fight.”

  Audra looked at me, waiting for me to apologize. Ailey was the third girl. Audra had trusted Ailey with this secret when she wouldn’t trust me. No. Worse. She’d included Ailey in it. Ailey had been hanging around with my friends, for months, behind my back. She knew a whole world of things about my best friends that I didn’t. Things she knew I didn’t know.

  “How much do you trust any of the girls?” she’d asked.

  Right, because Audra was the Bra&Panties slut. Everyone knew but me, and I was the one who got put into the fake sex video? I thought of the posts that Audra had done to “defend” me. Li’l Miss Straight-A, she kept calling me; she wished I had more courage to stand up and set a better feminist example about the entire situation. I shook my head.

  “Did you make the video, Audra?”

  Audra laughed, then clapped her hands, slow and sarcastic.

  “That’s perfect. You have some serious trust issues, Kyle. I mean, here you are blaming everyone else, but did you ever stop to examine why this is happening to you?”

  “Only about a thousand times!” I yelled. “And maybe I have trust issues, but at least I’m not vengeful. How is hating your best friend for nearly a year better than being honest with her and working through the aftermath? I’m not such a beast you couldn’t have told me about B&P. This is just like your mother not changing the pescatarian setting. You’d rather feel vindicated and misunderstood than actually address the issue and feel better.”

  My voice was shaking with emotion. Tears streamed down Audra’s cheeks. This was normally the part where one or the other of us would realize what a big scene we were making, crack a joke, and hug in a flurry of tears and apologies. Instead, Audra’s nostrils flared.

  “You don’t know anything about my relationship with my mother.” Audra jabbed a finger into my face. “At least she’s awful to everyone. Your mother is amazing and she only despises you.”

  I smacked her hand away. We were over. We were so completely over.

  “You still haven’t said you didn’t make the video,” I said.

  Audra put the lid on the gelato and tossed it back in the freezer.

  “FCK you, Kyle,” she said. “I’m calling a car. Anyone else want a ride home? I’ll pay with my slut money.”

  Audra pinged a car and went to wait outside. Fawn and Sharma swore they weren’t leaving because they were mad or were choosing sides, but, well, dot-dot-dot. After they left, I stayed downstairs and cleaned up the kitchen, trying to make sense of everything. When I finally went up to bed thirty minutes later, Mom was at the top of the stairs. It was the first time I’d seen her since our fight on Sunday.

  “Everything okay?”

  “Yeah.” I nodded.

  She frowned, an exhausted I expected exactly that kind of answer frown. She patted my arm and went to her room. I wanted to say that I was sorry. That I loved her. That, please, could she and I be okay now? Instead, as her hand touched the doorknob, I blurted out, “My hater cracked my Scholar app and sent off my unfinished college applications. And Audra is the Bra&Panties slut, which means all of my friends have been lying to me for months now. Also, I think I screwed up my relationship with Mac.”

  “Whoa.” Her expression became pinched. “Why didn’t you tell me about the Scholar app immediately?”

  Naturally this was the one she would pick.

  “Because every second my life gets worse and I can’t keep up.” A small dry sob escaped me. “What if I don’t get in anywhere? Who’s going to accept me?”

  Mom wrapped her robe tighter and cleared her throat. Here came my lecture. Instead she let out one short laugh.

  “Thank God I’m not a teenager anymore.”

  With a nod of her head, she herded me into my bedroom. She held the covers back as I climbed into bed. Then she sat next to me.

  “First of all,” she said, brushing aside my bangs, “you just finish those applications and I’ll contact the admissions offices. And can I say, without you getting mad at me, that just because President Malin and I went to Ivies, it doesn’t mean you need to too. If college is about anything other than robbing families of money or filling up your time between your late teens and early twenties, it’s about what you make of it.”

  Terrific. At the moment, I couldn’t make anything of anything.

  “And if I know you, whatever school you end up at will one day have a building named after you. Second, as for Mac, honey, I saw how he looked at you at the All Brains on Deck meeting. He clearly adores you. Now, don’t bite my head off for asking, but why aren’t you dating him?”

  I pulled at a loose thread on my bedspread.

  “Because Mackenzie Rodriguez doesn’t date. He scores, then moves on, and that’s that. It’s like I told him, history doesn’t lie.”

  Mom picked up Teddy and fiddled with his nose. She started to speak, stopped. Then, very carefully, she began again.

  “Let’s not forget Mac is a teenage boy. Not only is he prewired to want to make out with every available face, but he’s cute enough to actually get to do it. You can’t blame him for that. But how long have you two been close now? Since September? Has Mac scored with anyone in that time?”

  “No,” I said begrudgingly.

  Though who knew if that still held true. Oh gawd—my stomach constricted—the date. It had to have gone well; he hadn’t txted me even once.

  “Has he tried to score with you?”

  “Mom.” I rolled my eyes, but still said, “No. Not really. He actually asked me to be his girlfriend.”

  “So then what about that history? Isn’t it possible he feels differently about you?” She put her hands on my shoulders and gently shook me. “Regardless, baby, save all this relationship anxiety for your thirties. It’s not like you have to marry him. Actually, for the record, you should not marry your high school boyfriend. That’s how you end up miserable in your late twenties. If you didn’t like Mac that way, that’d be one thing. But I’ve also seen how you look at him.”

  I played with the hem of her robe and then finally said what I’d been worried about this whole time.

  “What if he breaks my heart? I’ll feel like such an idiot.”

  “Well.” Her gray eyes crinkled at the corners. “That’s all part of the experience. It’s a given—an absolute fact—that at some point in life a person you love will tear your heart to shreds, but I don’t think that makes you stupid and I don’t think that person is Mackenzie Rodriguez. If anything, it will be the other way around. And then you’ll move on.”

  Miraculously, problem by problem, Mom was making me feel better. Why had we been at each other’s throats so much these last few years? I let out a long sigh.

  “That’s right,” she said. “Deep breaths. Also, before I lose the opportunity, might I add that if Mac does try to score with you, please use a condom.”

  “Ew, Mom. Gross.”

  “I’m sorry. It needed to be said. And lastly, I know she’s your best friend, but, honey, Audra’s always been kind of a bitch.”

  Shocked, I laughed, “Mom.”

  “I’
m sorry, but it’s true. Living with that family doesn’t give her much choice. Granted, before the other night I hadn’t seen her for a while, but honey, Audra is clearly going through it.”

  “What did you two even talk about?”

  “At first, business. How the Paris stores were coming along, whether or not I liked my bookkeeper and accountant. I thought she was asking me on her parents’ behalf. Though, come to think of it, she did sound like she knew what she was talking about. I mean, what teenager knows about C corps? Then we mostly talked about you. How much she respected you, envied you. How she wished she could make you see and appreciate how perfect your life was. To be honest, it was a little intense. But I thought that’s what you liked about Audra. Her intensity. I mean, are you really that shocked that Audra’s this bra-and-panties girl?”

  “Yes,” I huffed, but then, quieter, I said, “No. But it’s more than that. Instead of just telling me about B&P, Audra’s been increasingly resentful and nasty. And all along everyone knew why but me. Fawn slips up and spills secrets all the time. It’s not just Audra. I’m not sure I can be friends with any of them anymore. I mean, now I’m not even sure that I was to begin with.”

  “Honey, the girls have known each other since they were babies. I’m not sure you can expect to have the same kind of friendship and trust that they do, coming in as late as you did.”

  But then how come Ailey got let in on the secret?

  “What do I know?” Mom sighed when I didn’t respond. “I always thought as far as friends are concerned, you reap what you sow.”

  Poof. Gone went the relaxed vibe. In the dark I sensed Mom tense, like those last words accidentally got out and she wanted to bite them back in. I actually kind of felt sorry for her. Even in our times of peace, she still couldn’t quite like or forgive me. Audra was a bitch, my friends all let me down, and I’d reaped what I’d sown. Did this moment count as the person I loved tearing my heart to shreds? I rolled away from her so I was facing the wall.