War Torn Love

by Londo, Jay M.

  I looked over at my Momma, she was smiling at me - now she too had tears in her eyes, I guess we were all quite emotional, I guess I know where I got it from. And then I spotted a curious sister and her husband dance once or twice by us, trying to see if I was ok. Even Abram’s parents had their attention on us. I guess we were the talk of the room that night. There was no way we would be leaving the dance floor anytime soon. Not if any of them had a say. An hour or so of dancing with Abram and I stopped to have a bite to eat. I really was not hungry - I was just too happy to eat, but I couldn’t dance any more either. I didn’t want to let him go.

  We stopped for punch to quench our thirst. But once we started dancing, I really didn’t want stopping. If I had it my way, I would never let the evening draw to a close. The two of us slowly began to relax, get into a groove of the music, and being around one another enjoying what was happening, and by the end of the night, I’m happy to say we were staring to loosen up. We were even looking into each other’s eyes. Seeing things in each other’s eyes things neither of us had ever taken the time to notice before. I thought you know if you have to fall in love, then falling in love with your best friend is the best choice. I had become so relaxed in his arms, as the two of us danced - I rested my head against his chest.

  Turns out the worst part of this whole evening was when it came to a conclusion. It snuck up on us so quickly – as the time had dragged leading up to it. It was as if time was an elastic band, and it had snapped around us, for the time that had slowed to a crawl in anticipation. I could not believe how fast it had flown-by.

  As my father came over to the two of us, he said, “Come on sweetie it’s time we better get home.” It was past midnight - my parents had never let me stay out this late before. I had no idea it had gotten so late.

  “Ok Poppa!”

  Both families walked home together, Poppa and Abram’s father both were smoking cigars. I guess that since Sissy married into their family, we were one big happy family now.

  As I gazed up at the stars, I secretly hopped I too would be marrying into the family, especially after how this evening had turned out. And then an amazing thing happened. I saw a sparkling trail, across the sky – it was my first shooting star, I made my wish. The wish was crystal clear – myself and Abram, old together on a rocking chair, holding hands, watching our families around our feet, a glorious farm spread out beyond our view. It was so perfect the picture. That one split – second, there was my world. Something though, niggled. I pushed it away.

  It was such a nice warm pleasant evening, the sky was clear. The moon was nearly full. And the star’s painted an incredible silhouette – a relief in light across the entire night sky.

  Abram and I walked up ahead of the rest and I think that they all held back just a smidge. We knew that they were all talking about us. I think that the only people surprised that Abram and I ended up together tonight, was Abram and I. The two of us talked all the way back home; we also held each other’s hand. It was about a half-mile walk back home. It was such a nice evening. He was such a gentlemen towards me, I loved that side of him - he walked me up to the front porch. My parents were kind enough to give us some space, as we both said our goodnights to one another. I was really hoping he’d just kiss me. I panicked near the end – and then I believed I was not going to get it. Abram nervously learned in, eyes closed, and kissed me on my cheek. I returned the kiss, slightly boldly. His eyes lit with the stars in the sky behind him – a supernova of joy sparkling into them. I smiled back, my own galaxy of joy on display for him, and then Abram began walking off, almost reluctantly.

  “Abram I really had a good time with you tonight, and thanks again for my locket, I really do love it!” I called, as he got to the path, and I headed on inside the house. I was so happy I was not even sure if my feet were even touching the ground on my way up stairs to my room. I got undress, changed into my nightgown, and got in bed. All kinds of thoughts racing through my head. A few minutes later Poppa came to tuck me in, as he does every night. He kissed me on the forehead. I’ll never forget that look - he seemed so happy, yet sad at the same time. I trailed up to bed, though; I swear my feet barely touched the wooden risers on the stairs.

  There was a knock on my bedroom door,

  “Yes!”

  “It’s Poppa!”

  “Hi Poppa, I was just thinking about tonight.”

  I looked up at him. Poppa ran his hand gently through my hair, and then he kissed me on my forehead, and then turned out the light.

  “Poppa, I love you so much, thank you for tonight. I had such a fantastic time. Poppa do not be sad, I’ll always be your little girl. Poppa Abram and…”

  Interrupting me, “I know my little bear cub! I always knew that you and Abram would be good together. I understand, it’s just hard to see you growing up so, it’s happening so fast.”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  “KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR”

  I was rapidly approaching my seventeen birthday, I had grown into a young woman - my thoughts were of love and the future. Some of the big changes that been going on, my grandmother moved in when I was sixteen. And excitedly I only a month away from finally graduating from high school. Truthfully, I did not like school much, although I pulled a good grade. I just wanted school to be over with I never liked it.

  I am happy to report, Abram who truly is my “knight in shining armor”, my “King Author.” The two of us were madly in love with one another. I couldn’t think of going one whole day without being able to see him; to look into his eyes, kiss his warm, soft lips.

  Why I declared him my Author, it was all to do with some events in the last year. See he bravely came to my aid, after he defended my honor at a dance he and I were attending, put on by our Synagogue.

  It started with a drunken man, a complete stranger to me, who was getting quite rudely getting fresh with me, and when I politely responded, “No thank you, I am here with my boyfriend.” He would not take no, for an answer.

  “So if you’re here with your boyfriend, then where is he?” he slurred. His breath smelled horrible as he leaned in to ask.

  “Oh I am meeting him here.” I responded, trying to keep the quiver out of my voice.

  “Please, you don’t know what you’re missing, now come on lets go dance!”

  “Listen, I said no thank you - now will you please go!”

  I was trembling by now - this person was scaring me. I had been waiting for Abram to arrive; my girlfriend was standing right next to me, neither of us knew what to do. Luckily, this is why I knighted Abram. I was so relieved when I spotted him out of the corner of my eye.

  Abram was just arriving after getting off from work late. He was able to witness and hear what was taking place. He was a hot head however; he decided to take the diplomatic approach, in his dealing with this tall dark stranger.

  “Excuse me sir, I believe you were told that, this young lady didn’t want to dance with you.”

  “Who are you to be telling me this?”

  “I am her boyfriend!”

  “You’re just a boy!”

  He started laughing, and then when this guy still wouldn’t leave me alone, even though I continued to reject him, Abram began to get annoyed. His fists clenched but still he held his cool, trying to pull me away.

  Then, the drunk slurred the words out, “You think you’re better than me - you’re just a filthy Jew girl.”

  No longer able to turn the other cheek, I could tell Abram had heard - he called once my honor called into question. More, he’d slurred me for our religion. Though he did not get angry often, I recognized that he had enough. Losing his temper, he swung. All it took is one single punch - breaking the man’s nose. His blood flowed everywhere.

  As soon as the guy hit the ground, Abram turned to me, “Sweetie are you ok? He didn’t hurt you, did he?”

  “No he didn’t hurt me! I’m just a little shaken up. But now that you’re here, I’m feeling much better.” I put my arm
s around him, “Hey let’s not let this spoil our evening. I’ve been looking so forward to dancing with you, wrapped up in your arms all week, and look how handsome you look, now I look like a complete mess, hey I’ll tell you what, let me go to the bathroom and freshen up, I’ll be right back.”

  “Ok, Hana I’ll get rid of this party crasher, while you’re away.”

  And he did – while I was washing up. Abram and his friends dragged him away. I do not know what they did with him, I never asked, deep down I did not care. I never saw him again. Abram could certainly handle his own; I guess it was a turn-on.

  Now where do I begin when describing Abram, he had not only shot up in height, but he also filled out? It’s no wonder why I can’t stop thinking about him. He is now six feet- two-inches-tall, two-hundred and thirty pounds. And he’s positively ripping with muscles. His chest and arms are amazing to look at, and even better to touch. All the years of hard work on the farm had done him some good. And for fun, a couple of years ago he took up boxing. Turns out he is quite good at I -, I love going watch him practice at the gym. He is racked up quite a few bouts thus far. The fellow he hit tonight fell out cold. Funny if he did not like Jewish girls, then why would he have show up to an all-Jewish dance in the first place? Being spit on, or called names isn’t anything new if you just so happen to be Jewish, but that did not mean it did not hurt. Especially me, because I took it all so personally.

  Abram was amazing, the way he came to my defense, defending my honor. I am always daydreaming about a life with him a lifetime spent cozying up in his arms. Something about seeing him get that guy off of me, I got all hot and bothered. I had never felt like this before. Once we started to kiss, I have to say it was so hard pulling away, and stopping myself, I wanted to go all the way right then and there. I nearly forgot I was a good girl, but I was determined to save my virginity for my wedding night with him.

  I felt truly blessed having him in my life, all my prayers have been heard and answered by our dear Lord over the last couple of years. I felt as if everything was going as I had planned.

  The magnificent news was Abram and I had officially been dating just two months shy of four happy years. And in all that time we’d never even had so much as a fight. Our love is bottomless - he is now and everlastingly will be much a part of me as my own beating heart. I have never even dreamed of being with another man. The mere thought of that has never even crossed my young mind, well because of my current age – anyway they’re boy’s, not men, as Momma would refer to them. I remember one time, talking with mother, mentioning how positively wonderful the man I am in love with is, for the umpteenth time. I guess Momma was starting to get tired of hearing about it, in view of the fact that it seems that every other word coming out of my mouth, is “Abram this, “Abram that.” I guess I got a bit carried away with whole love affair.

  Last night while Abram and I were on a date, he had taken me to the picture show he knows how much I love going to the movies. He’s so good to me, I think he thinks that he needs to spoil me. I keep telling him he doesn’t have to spend his money all on me, that he should save up for our future. I was much better with money than he was. I have been saving nearly all the money I earned from my job - taking in sewing with Momma.

  While the two of us were walking home hand to hand after the movie, it was such a lovely night out. The moon was out in full splendor, so bright. The stars painted little tiny lights all across the night sky, as if they were just put there just for the two of us to corrigibly enjoy. A cooling, yet gentle breeze at our backs, to keep us from getting hot.

  We strolled down the main street of town, which was lined with huge old elm trees, all of which were all over a century old. We held hands. Then Abram - out of the blue - suddenly stopped walking! I could tell something was up. He had been acting a bit strange all evening, completely out of character for even him. Then he got down on one knee, looked up into my un-expecting eyes. Gently holding onto my hand, he surprised me by asking that oh so important question,

  “Hana, I couldn’t imagine a day of my life without you in it. I don’t know how to say this… What I am trying to ask, would do the honor of marrying me? I would like to spend the rest of my life with you. I cannot imagine not having you in my life to share it with. All that I dream has you as a part of it.”

  After I said, “YES!!!!” It was as if the words automatically rolled out of my mouth within seconds - I did not need to think it over. I had rehearsed my answer a thousand different times before, just in case he asked me. I had my answer before he even had asked me the question.

  Both now overwhelmed, Abram and I sat down at a park bench, and talked it over -we realized we wanted to get married in the worst of way, we both surprisingly discovered that either had been secretly dreaming of this day for years. To have to wait, seemed like a nightmare neither of us wanted to play out. It took me all of three seconds, to consider my answer, and of course, it was why not? How could it have been anything different? However, don’t you hate when something good happens, then shortly after, of course there has to be a however, out of someone’s mouth. This time out of Abram’s.

  “Hana dearest, before you get to excited, you know I believe strongly in tradition, and I respect your father, and I want him to respect me. I guess it is time I go have a man to man talk with your father. I intend on convincing him to allow me to marry you Hana. Oh, sweetie do not worry dear, I know he will say yes. He knows how much we love one another. And you are of age.”

  The next day as I was around my family, it was harder than ever to hold such a secret in, keeping it from my family - who I normally share, everything with. More determined than ever I managed to suck up a small amount of courage to get through it, and he then arranged the meeting between the two of them. We were both quite nervous, going into this, not sure what Poppa’s response was going to be. Holding my tongue more than a week time, was honestly probably the longest I have ever kept such a secret. I was just horrible at keeping any sort of secrets - or lying I was never able to keep a straight face. Hardly sleeping, worrying about the ultimate outcome. I played out hundreds of times, all the pro, and cons why Poppa would, or would not give permission.

  Things began unfolding quite rapidly, “once the genie was let out of the lamp.” There was no turning back now. I realized if I wanted to be treated as a woman, and then I should probably start acting like one, or I’d never be taken seriously. We passionately waited for the very right moment to approach Poppa; I preferred to make sure Poppa was positively in a great mood, before Abram went and talked to him. I knew better then not to talk to him if he had had a bad day. On bad days, he never say’s yes to anything, no exceptions, he can be very stubborn. My mother taught me that. Abram came close on three separate nights, until I gave Abram the green light to go for it - I wanted our odds to be the best they could.

  And then, finally, I guessed the time was right - Abram called to talk to Poppa, about asking for my hand in married.

  Trembling as he began to ask, “Sir the reason I wanted to talk to you is I would like the honor to marry Hana.”

  I don’t know exactly what happened next – neither would ever tell me.

  But, of course, Poppa has granted us his permission.

  He told Abram, “Before this can happen, you two must first graduate from high school.” He felt this very important.

  Upon hearing this fantastic news, I was so excited upon hearing this from Poppa’s lips, because that is when I knew it was finally real, and that we would become man and wife.

  Abram and I sat down in the front room to hear Poppa’s verdict. I was biting my nails, as I always did when nervous. I hadn’t thought it looked so good when Poppa’s had been silent, from the look of it, deep in contemplation. I attentively studied his mannerisms, recognizing this practical look all too well, his whole right eyebrow raised up, and arched high, almost unnaturally. His left hand placed over his mouth, counseling the movement of his lips, revealing nothing, e
ither positive or negative. He was mumbling to himself. Soft enough that no one could hear him, but knew he was in fact saying something. He was aware all eyes in the room were firmly placed on him.

  Abram and I sat mutually together on the love seat, nervously holding each other’s hands, in expectation, of his decision coming down. This answer could surely change my life. Momma was sitting in her rocking chair, her shoes tapping on the hardwood floors, tap, tap, and tap. As her hard soles made contact with the hardwood floor. I could tell she too was on pins and needles as was I, I knew that she was rooting for the two of us. Poppa was sitting stoically beside Momma, holding her hand. They were looking over at us, then back to one another. I think that they were purposely trying to make us squirm in our seats, why we waited for our verdict. I know how much Poppa adored my sweetheart. I started a whole slew of self-talk in my head. I began questioning how he could not possibly say no to us, why would he? Then I thought what if he does not give us permission, what I would do then. My life would simply be over.

  Then the silence was at lastly broken,