War Torn Love

by Londo, Jay M.

  Abelia and my niece were thankfully small enough that the Germans at least deemed them too young for actual manual labor, but they did not get off so scot-free. They had to quietly sit next to where I worked all day, hour after hour. They got so bored; there was nothing I could do for them. Nevertheless, being we were being fed so little, the girls did not had much energy, to move about. They ended up sleeping through much of the time I worked. They were old enough to know that if they acted up while I was working, this would surely spell doom for us, and God forbid they could be sent away to a very bad place. They had learned this from a very young age.

  The soldiers were always watching us, making sure that we were always working hard. In a twelve-hour day, we were only given two short breaks during the whole day to go the bathroom. No lunch was given to us. It was must difficult for the girls. By the time I finally got to go the bathroom, I was seeing yellow.

  One day, months after we moved to the camp, I got a painfully hard question to try to answer honestly it honestly broke my heart. It happened when my niece out of the blue asked me when I was putting her down for the night.

  “Auntie will I see Mommy and Daddy again, did they get sent to that bad place I heard the women talking about? Is that why they have not come back?”

  How exactly was I supposed to respond to that, I had to lie to her, I had to give her a small measure of hope, something to look forward too. I could not take about the only remaining thing that she had left to her in the world. I told her, “one day you shall see your Momma and Poppa. They were just sent to a different work camp than us is all! But remember mommy wanted me to watch you while she was away, now come here and let me give you a kiss.” Without saying a thing back, she just upped and wrapped her arms around me and held on tightly, I put my own arms around her.

  I hated having to do that, I did not want to have to lie to her, but I could not break her young heart now. I think God would understand my deception.

  It seemed like all we did in this place was either work or sleep, with nothing in-between. Being that we were slowly being starved we never had any spare energy. Then the few hours we had to ourselves each day, inside our barrack, without the guards watching us, breathing down our throats, proved pleasant. The only sanity coming in the entire day, so we tried making it a rule to leave all the badness of the world on the other side of the doors, we used this time to pray, especially for strength to be able to get through all this. We also used the time to sing, carry on conversations, or just rest up.

  While the women would get together, and talk, acting as support groups. We met and prayed every morning, and in the evening. We were determined not to let them take our faith from us as well. The children would play. It was so good seeing them having a little fun. The sleeping situation was absolutely deplorable, it was so cramped, there was so many of us clumped together in such a tiny spot! It was cold, and the benches from which we slept were quite hard, quite hard and unforgiving on my poor sore back.

  The Nazis were only kind enough that they only supplied one wood burning stove to heat the whole building; I think the only thing that kept us remotely warm during the cold nights was all the accumulated body heat. There seems to always be a cold draft. The worst was not having my husband lying next to me, curling his body around mine, and keeping me warm. I thought of him so frequently at night, I prayed that he and the rest of the family were all-ok and sent to a different work camp. I also cried for my Marym, and the rest of the family I knew are gone. I hoped that all their deaths were fast, if they had to go. I could not think of any of them having to suffer too much, I just hoped they went quickly if they ended up perishing. I usually ended up crying every night, as my thoughts always turned to them. I tried always waiting until the girls were fast asleep first, before I would silently cry with the palm of my hand over my mouth.

  A month after arriving at this bloody camp, and just after the girls and I ate our meager dinner. Some soldiers appeared, they came into the barracks unexpectedly, shocking us all; since they do not normally show up until it’s time for us to go to sleep. We all knew this could not be too good of a good sign, we all suddenly afraid. It more than likely meant someone was being hauled off. They did not tell any of us what they were even doing here in the first place. The place that had been full of chatter moments prior to the door unexpectedly opening up, went completely silent, you could had heard a pin drop. I held onto the girls, I whispered for them not to say a thing!

  The two soldiers looked unhappy to even be here. Soon as coming in through the doors. They personally called out the two girls and my names. I was shocked to hear our names being called out, why? They asked us to come forward at once, and come with them immediately. I was afraid, and puzzled why we were suddenly being called out, and then asked to go along with them. I was afraid we were going to be killed, why now, what had we done to suddenly warrant this, that they specifically called us out, hadn’t we already been through enough, the Nazis always wanted to take even more from all of us, it seemed never to be enough. Another thing they take great pleasure in, is shaking things up. Every one sadly watched on as we left, scared for us, also feeling so helpless they could not help. I think that they were all fearing for their own well-being, and ours they all knew enough not to reach out to us, to draw unneeded attention on themselves. Nevertheless, I knew that they were good people, and would pray for us. I certainly could not blame them. If the roles had been reversed, I would have probably done the very same thing as them.

  The soldiers did not give us any sort hint to why or where exactly they were now taking the three of us. I held on tightly to the girl’s hands, trying to reassure them both that it was all going to be ok, as I noticed how upset they had become. I was too, but the promise I was asked to keep suddenly once more resolute loudly in my ears. I owed it to these girls to remain strong.

  We were immediately brought over to the main camp gates - the guards up in the towers spotted us coming their way, spotlights shined directly down and focused on three of us as we continued to advance forward, since it was dark by this time. The light was a bit blinding in my eyes. There was two set of fences, in-between the fences, there was about a five-foot separation, in-between was just a no man’s land. I noticed a soldier patrolling with a German-Sheppard. Two soldiers opened both sets of gates up, and then promptly closed them up right behind us. Leaving this all behind. We were away from the main part of the camp. We walked down a gravel road at least a mile. Being led by the soldiers, one ahead of us, and one behind us, oddly this time around we did not go through the same gates as if we were when going to work, we went to the other end of this work-camp, an area we had not been before now. Then the soldiers led us over to a good size building where there was an awful lot of racket, and clamor coming from inside of the place. I was not sure what exactly this was all about.

  It was abundantly clear we were not in the same section of Auschwitz. There were not any Jews around us. Looking around it was much nicer then where we stayed; it could be the soldiers living area if I had to speculate. So why were we then being brought here? There was tree’s, military vehicles. This area did not had the same gloomy feel. The air was much fresher, being situated much further away from the smoke stacks churning out the thick black smoke.

  A couple of soldiers came out of this nearby building drinking beer, quite unruly in their general behavior. Clearly, they were off duty. If I did not know any better, I would have to say they were both on the drunkard side. A couple of these off duty soldiers had young, beautiful, under dressed women at their sides. They were all laughing. The soldiers with the women at their sides were clearly drunk, the women even drunker then them, and smoking, and singing some song in German. Then they so happened to spot me and my girls standing nearby, right in mid-song. They clearly could not leave well enough alone; in their drunkard, state, they immediately started saying filthy thing to us, words the girls should never have had to hear, they said them in Polish so they knew we would
understand them. That is when the two soldiers that brought us here in the first place came forward, and stopped the two drunken unarmed soldiers who were about to make a move.

  Heading them off, one of the soldiers began speaking in German with the two drunken soldiers, I do not know German so I had no idea exactly what was being said, but if I would had to venture to say I would guess it had to do something to do with me, and the girls. But the two drunkard soldier’s attitude suddenly drastically changed, after the other soldier suddenly spoke to them. They said something, back and then quickly turned and left, leaving us alone once more, I had noticed that these drunkard soldiers had quickly had a very different look about them on their faces; they almost looked a bit scared if I had not known better. But it is so hard to read a Nazi’s face, they’re trained to be rigid, and cold, hide their feelings. Then the soldier escorting us had turned back gazing at me, and then said, “Sit down you, and wait!” pointing to a nearby bench. The girls and I went over and then sat down - I was scratching my head, just trying to figure this all out. The girls were exhausted, and wanted to go to sleep. There was an awful lot of yelling, and cheering going on just off to one side, and it was all coming from the inside the nearby building. After listening to all the commotion for a couple of minutes, it sounded an awful lot like a boxing match. I had been around them long enough to be familiar with the common sounds they tended to generate.

  I sat there a couple of more minutes, the thought started dawning on me – I could not bear to, think that could possibly be my Abram in there fighting. Oh, my I wager it is. I bet he is winning. I put my hand over my mouth to keep from screaming out-loud with joy! I did not want to get the girls excited, just in case I was completely wrong. However, it could be since, the commander, he was shrewd fan of Abram’s boxing before the war. Then it had dawned on me that the commander pointing over at us when we all first had arrived here. And why else would they had brought the girls and I here on this night. What other value were we to him. Oh, now is he being forced to fight!

  Suddenly I was given a possibility at looking forward to something for a change, an actual reason to be excited, after being so completely dead on the inside, over that last month, it had been the worst month in my entire life. The thought that my darling husband was still alive, and I just may see him once again well it started overwhelming me, it had been so long. So many feelings cropped up, they came rushing in. I was getting flustered in my breathing. I felt just like I had on my wedding day!

  A half-hour later German soldiers began pouring out of the building. It must be all over. Some in attendees looked quite happy with the outcome, counting their money they just had clearly won on the bet, others looked mad, as they were handing over their losses to yet others. There were quite a few Nazi officers in attendance. And they were pouring out of the building all at once. A couple more minutes had passed by. We had been called all kind of names as we waited. No more soldiers were going by any longer. I think the place was now emptied. I began thinking that I had prematurely gotten my hopes up, all excited over nothing maybe that was not him in there after all; maybe I was sent here for a whole another reason. On the other hand, maybe he was hurt or killed in the ring!

  As I was about to begin to cry, knowing I had gotten it all so wrong, concealed by the darkness, trailing any amount of hope once more. The girls completely unaware of what I was going through, thankfully I was hiding my pain.

  But then I had spotted him, like a perfect angel. My prayers suddenly being answered. There he was, it all seemed so impossible just seconds ago, yet the events were unfolding right there before me. I almost wonder if I was dreaming all this up. If I was, it all seemed so real, since I wanted it so badly. It truly was Abram drawing near me. When I spotted him, and I was sure, it was he. My heart began skipping a beat; I was so nervously, I thought I was going to hyperventilate. So completely excited to be seeing him. My prayers had truly been answer,

  So excited I almost needed the girls to see him with their own eyes, just to make sure I was not seeing things. I said, “Girls open your eyes, come on look over there, look who is here to see you!”

  Both girls’ eyes suddenly lit way up, as well as mine. They both started screaming in excitement. He came over and hugged us all - in one big arm full, a group hug! He powerfully smelled of sweat, but he smelt so wonderful! I loved his smell. I did not realize just how much I had missed it.

  “Honey how is this even possible? How is it that my husband is standing before me now?” I excitedly asked. Liked I really cared; the point was, he was actually there is all that really mattered.

  He smiled; “I told you not to give up Hana, “where there is a will there is a way,” Well it would seem my boxing skill could just so happen save the four of us lives! And I intend on utilizing my skills. With the strength of our God behind me, and your love. And your pretty face in my mind! Hana it was absolutely amazing tonight, you should have seen me, it felt just like the old days when I fought. At least while I was in that ring, I was feeling just like my former self, except I knew the stakes were awfully high.

  Well the commander of this camp it would seem is a huge boxing fan, more importantly for us, he is a huge fan of mine, turns out, he had been following my career since before the war, could you believe that Hana? That a high-ranking Nazi is a fan of a simple Jew! Seeing this place, it almost seems impossible that we could now be together.”

  I responded, “Wow! Abram, I have to inquire, how come we were brought here now? Did you had something to do with arranging all this?”

  “Hana, yes, let me, explain - we do not have much time. We have only been permitted five minutes together; let’s make it count shall we my love!”

  “Ok so what is going on?”

  “I have to fight once a week, on whatever challenger he picks for me to fight. The good news to this is, if I win the bout. Then after the fight, I will be given five-minutes alone with you, and the girls. and the three of you will be guaranteed to be able to stay alive one more week, and be provided a better place to stay for you and the girls, and not to mention access to more food than you’re currently receiving now, you all look so thin, dam them how could they do this to our people!”

  Suddenly I was worriedly intrigued with what my husband told me; I had to ask, “Abram, I am afraid to ask, but what happens if you do not win your fight?”

  Then he was hushed a moment, not wanting to tell me this, “Don’t worry I will win!

  I gave him my look he knew all too well, so he then reluctantly whispered in my ear, cautiously carefully so the girls would not hear what he was about to say to me, just by his actions I knew I probably would not want to know the answer, but I had to know.

  “If I do not, the tragedy to this, honey he said he would personally shot the three of you in the head, forcing me to watch the whole thing, and then I’ll be sent to the concentration camp, not before he injures me enough so that I would never be able to box again. Hana I know what you are thinking, look at me. I know that is not what you want to be hearing from me, but I will not lose, I cannot what choice have I been given.”

  I knew he was doing his best to cheer me up. And I certainly did not want to waste the little time I had with him.

  He went on, “The positive here is, the commander is giving me much more food to eat each day, I had been slowly getting my strength and health back, and he had been letting me train every day, I even seen a doctor, he at least it would seem wants me to be at my prime, before each fight. With my mind thinking more clearly, I have been thinking of you guys. Pushing myself harder than I ever had. Hana, if you think about this, you darn well know I could do this, in all my heart, I know I can. I had been training very hard ever since I got here. Look at me Hana I feel so much better. You always said you thought I was the greatest in the world! Well I guess I get a chance to prove it to you, and them; I had the greatest motivation in the world, not to lose, the greatest prize of all if I can win. No matter what opponent comes at m
e, I will not stop fighting, and go on to a victory.

  Oh, ya! There is one more thing to all this that I had to tell you; The Nazi said that if I won here tonight, than the three of you then would be moved out of the work camp. And would make sure you were moved into an officers house, probably be his, I am not sure. You are going to be made a cook I hope - I bragged to him what a great cook you are. At least your guys living standard will improve some, it’s the best I can do for you right now sweetheart. And the girls can stay in the kitchen with you, I am sure they would like that. I cannot even begin to tell you how good it is to see you all! It has really lifted my spirits seeing you all, knowing you are all alive. I just hope that they allow you guys access to more food, you have lost so much weight.”

  “It is so good seeing you too Abram, oh I do so wish you did not have to see me in this manner, I must look like a terrible fright without any hair - all my beautiful long hair is gone Abram. You on the other hand look rather handsome with short hair, you know get a better look at you, it sort of reminds me of when we were both little kids, remember your mother would cut all your hair off for the summer time, Oh how you hated it. And it is good to see you in boxing shorts once more, you look rather handsome! It is real good seeing you like this again!”