The Arabian Nights (New Deluxe Edition)

by Muhsin Mahdi

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-THIRD NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  I heard, O happy King, that the steward told the king of China that the young merchant said:

  She sat in my shop and unveiled her face, and when I saw it, I sighed. Then she asked me, “Do you have any fabrics?” I replied, “My lady, your servant is poor, but wait until the other merchants open their shops, and I will get you whatever you wish.” We sat talking for a while and I was beginning to feel an overwhelming passion for her. When the merchants opened their shops, I rose and got her everything she wished, to the value of five thousand dirhams. She gave the fabrics to the eunuch and went back to the slaves, who brought her the she-mule, and she mounted and rode away, without telling me where she lived. Being too embarrassed to mention money before such a beautiful woman, I vouched to the merchants for the value of the goods, incurring a debt of five thousand dirhams. Then I went home, drunk with love, and for a week was unable to eat or drink or sleep.

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then Dinarzad said, “Sister, what an entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-FOURTH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  It is related, O King, that the steward told the king of China that the young merchant said:

  A week later the merchants came to me, asking for their money, but I persuaded them to wait, and as soon as another week passed, the lady came up, riding the she-mule and followed, as usual, by the eunuch and the two slaves. She greeted me and, sitting down in the shop, said, “I am late in bringing you the money for the fabrics. Fetch a money changer and receive the amount.” I sent for the money changer, and the eunuch counted out the money and gave it to him. Then she and I sat talking until the shops opened, at which time I paid every merchant what I owed him. Then she said to me, “Sir, get me such and such,” and I got her what she wanted from the merchants, and she took it and went away, without saying a word about payment. I began to regret what I had done, for the price of what I had bought for her was a thousand dinars, and I said to myself, “What a predicament! She has given me five thousand dirhams but has taken a thousand dinars’ worth of goods, and the merchants know only me. There is no power and no strength, save in God, the Almighty, the Magnificent. This woman who tricked me must be a swindler, and I did not even ask her for her address.”

  She was gone for more than a month, and the merchants began to press me for their money and, finally despairing of ever seeing her again, I put up my property for sale. But one day, while I sat dejected and perplexed, she came in and, sitting in the shop, said, “Fetch the scales and take your money.” Then she gave me the money and sat, conversing freely with me, until I was beside myself with joy. Then she asked me, “Do you have a wife?” I replied, “No, I have never been married,” and began to weep. She asked, “Why do you weep?” I replied, “It is nothing.” Then, giving the eunuch some money, I asked him to act as my go-between with her. But he laughed and said, “By God, she is more in love with you than you are with her. She had no need for the fabrics she bought from you, but she only did it out of love for you. Tell her yourself what you want.” She had seen me giving the eunuch the money, so I said to her, “Be charitable and permit your servant to ten you what is on his mind.” Then I told her what was on my mind, and she assented and said to the eunuch, “You shall carry my message to him,” and saying to me, “Do whatever he asks you,” went away. I paid the merchants what I owed them and spent a sleepless night.

  A few days later the eunuch came to me …

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then her sister Dinarzad said, “Sister, what a strange and entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-FIFTH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  It is related, O King, that the steward told the king of China that the young man said:

  When the eunuch came, I treated him generously, and when I asked him about his mistress, he replied, “She is pining with love for you.” Then I asked him, “Who is she?” and he said, “She is one of the waiting-women who is charged with errands for the Lady Zubaida, the wife of the caliph, who brought her up. By God, she told her lady about you and begged her to marry her to you, but the Lady Zubaida said, ‘I will not marry you to him until I see whether he is handsome and whether he is a match for you.’ I will take you to the palace at once, and if you succeed in entering without being seen, you may win her in marriage, but if you are found out, you will lose your head. What do you say?” I replied, “I am ready to go with you.” Then he said, “As soon as it is night, go to the mosque built by the Lady Zubaida on the Tigris River.” I replied, “Very well.” Then I went to the mosque, where I performed my evening prayer and passed the night.

  Just before daybreak, there came up some servants in a boat, with some empty chests, which they deposited in the mosque and departed. But one of them stayed behind, and when I looked at him closely, I found that he was the eunuch who had come to me earlier. Soon, my lady herself came in, and when she drew near, I rose to greet her, and she sat to converse with me, with tears in her eyes. Then she made me get into one of the chests and locked me in. Then the eunuchs came back with all sorts of things that she kept stowing in the chests until she had filled them all and locked them. Then they placed the chests in the boat and headed downstream to the palace of the Lady Zubaida. I soon began to regret what I had done, saying to myself, “By God, I am undone,” and kept weeping and praying to God to deliver me until the boat reached the gate of the caliph’s palace. Then the eunuchs lifted out the chests, including mine, and carried them past the eunuchs in charge of guarding the harem until they came to a eunuch who seemed to be their chief. He started up from sleep.

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then her sister Dinarzad said, “Sister, what an entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-SIXTH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  I heard, O happy King, that the steward told the king of China that the young man said:

  The chief of the eunuchs started up from sleep and cried out to the young lady, “Don’t delay. You must open these chests.” It so happened that the chest he was about to start with was the one in which I was, and when they brought it to him, I lost my senses and in my panic wet myself until my urine began to run out of the chest. Then the young lady said, “Chief, you have ruined me and ruined many merchants by spoiling the belongings of the Lady Zubaida, for the chest contains colored dresses and a jar of Zam-zam water.4 The jar has just tipped over and the water will make the colors run.” The chief of the eunuchs said, “Take the chest and go.” But hardly had the eunuchs carried me and hurried away with all the other chests, when I heard a voice crying, “O my, O my, the caliph, the caliph!” When I heard this, my heart died within me. Then I heard the caliph ask the young lady, “Hey you, what is in these chests of yours?” She replied, “Clothes for the Lady Zubaida.” He said, “Open them and let me see,” and when I heard this, I knew that I was undone. Then I heard the young lady say, “O Commander of the Faithful, these chests contain the clothes and belongings of the Lady Zubaida, and she does not wish their contents to be seen by anyone.” But the caliph said, “You must open these chests, so that I may see what is in them. Bring them to me.” When I heard the caliph say, “Bring them to me,” I was sure of death. Then the eunuchs brought the chests up, opening them, one after another, and he kept looking at the clothes and belongings until there remained only the chest in which I was hiding. They carried me and let me down be
fore him, and I bade life good-bye, being certain that I was going to lose my head and die. The caliph said, “Open the chest, so that I may see what is in it,” and the eunuch rushed to open the chest.

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then Dinarzad said to her sister Shahrazad, “What a strange and entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-SEVENTH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  I heard, O King, that the steward told the king of China that the young man said:

  The caliph said to the eunuchs, “Open this chest, so that I may see what is in it.” But the young lady said, “O my lord, open it in the presence of the Lady Zubaida, for that which is in it is her secret, and she is more particular about this one than all the other chests.” When the caliph heard her explanation, he ordered the eunuchs to carry the chests inside, and two of them came and carried the chest in which I was hiding, while I could hardly believe that I was still alive. As soon as the chest was inside the harem, where my friend lived, she rushed in and, opening it, said, “Get out quickly and take this stairway upstairs.” I stood up and climbed out of the chest, and hardly had she closed the lid and I climbed the stairs, when the eunuchs came in with the other chests, followed by the caliph. Then they opened everything again before him, while he sat on the chest where I had been hiding. Then he got up and went into the harem.

  All this time I sat with my mouth dry from fear until the young lady came upstairs and said to me, “There is no longer anything to fear. Be cheerful and wait until the Lady Zubaida comes to see you, and you may be fortunate and win me.” I went downstairs, and as soon as I sat down in the small hall, there came in ten maids, like moons, and stood in two rows, and they were followed by twenty high-bosomed virgins, with the Lady Zubaida, who could hardly walk under the weight of her dresses and ornaments. When she drew near, the maids dispersed and brought her a chair, on which she sat. Then she cried out to the girls, who in turn cried out to me, and I advanced and kissed the ground before her. She motioned me to sit down, and I sat down before her, as she conversed with me and I answered her questions about my condition. She was pleased with me and finally said, “By God, I have not raised this girl in vain. She is like my own child, a trust committed to you by God.” Then she bade me stay for ten days in the palace.

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then Dinarzad said, “What a strange and entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-EIGHTH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  I heard that the steward told the king of China that the young man said:

  I stayed in the palace ten days and nights, without seeing the young lady. Then the Lady Zubaida consulted the caliph about the marriage of her waiting-woman, and he gave permission and assigned ten thousand dirhams for that purpose. Then the Lady Zubaida sent for the judge and witnesses, and they drew up the marriage contract, performed the ceremony, and for ten days thereafter celebrated our wedding with sumptuous meals and sweets. At the end of the ten days, the young lady entered the bath. In the meantime they set before me the supper tray, and as there was among the dishes a great platter of ragout cooked with pistachio nuts, white sugar, rosewater, and cumin, I did not hesitate but, by God, fell upon the ragout and ate until I was satisfied. Then I wiped my hands, for God had willed that I should forget to wash them.

  I sat until it grew dark, when they lit the candles and all the musicians and singing women of the palace came in a procession, beating the tambourines and singing all kinds of melodies and songs. They kept parading from room to room, displaying the bride and receiving gifts of money and pieces of silk, until they made the round of the whole palace and brought her to my room. They disrobed her and left her with me, but no sooner did I enter the bed with her and embrace her, hardly believing that she was mine, than, smelling the ragout spiced with cumin on my hand, she let out such a loud scream that the maids rushed in from all sides and stood around her, while I sat alarmed and trembled from fear, not knowing why she had screamed. The maids asked her, “Sister, what is the matter with you?” She replied, “Take this madman away from me.” I got up, afraid and bewildered, and asked her, “My lady, what makes you think me mad?” She replied, “Madman, didn’t you eat the ragout spiced with cumin without washing your hands? By God, I will punish you for it. Shall the like of you consummate marriage with one like me, with a hand smelling of ragout spiced with cumin?” Then she yelled at the girls, saying, “Throw him to the ground,” and they threw me to the ground, and she took a braided whip and fell with it on my back and buttocks until her arm was tired. Then she said to the girls, “Take him and send him to the chief of the police; so that he may cut off the hand with which he ate the ragout without washing it and sparing me the stench.” When I heard this, still smarting from the blows, I said to myself. “There is no power and no strength, save in God, the Almighty, the Magnificent.” What a calamity! What a great calamity! Did I suffer such a painful beating and will my hand be cut off, just because I ate the ragout spiced with cumin and forgot to wash my hands? May god curse this ragout and its very existence.”

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then Dinarzad said, “Sister, what a strange and entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-NINTH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  It is related that the steward told the king of China that the young man said:

  The girls interceded with her, saying, “Our lady, this man does not know your worth. Forgive him for our sake.” But she said, “He is a madman, and I must punish his hand, so that he may never again eat the ragout without washing it.” When the girls interceded again and kissed her hands, saying, “Our lady, for God’s sake, don’t blame him for what he forgot to do,” she yelled at me, cursed me, and went away, and they followed her.

  She was gone for ten days, during which a maid brought me food and drink everyday and informed me that the lady was not feeling well because I had eaten the ragout without washing my hands. I was very much amazed and burst out with anger, saying to myself, “What a cursed temper!” adding, “There is no power and no strength, save in God, the Almighty, the Magnificent.” When the ten days passed, the maid brought me the food and informed me that the lady was going to the bath, adding, “Bear her anger patiently, for tomorrow she will come to you.” When the lady finally came in, she looked at me and said, “May God shame you; couldn’t you be patient even for one moment? I will not make peace with you until I punish you for eating the ragout without washing your hands.” Then crying out to the girls, who surrounded me and bound me, she took out a sharp blade and, coming up to me, cut off my two thumbs, as you people can see for yourselves, and I fell into a swoon. Meanwhile, she sprinkled the wounds with powder and a store of drugs to stop the flow of blood, and when the blood stopped, the maids gave me wine to drink. As soon as I opened my eyes, I said to her, “I pledge to you that I will never again eat ragout spiced with cumin without washing my hands one hundred and twenty times.” The lady replied, “Bravo,” and made me take an oath to that effect. So when the food was brought in here, and I saw the ragout spiced with cumin, I turned pale and said to myself, “It was this dish that was the cause of cutting off my thumbs”; so when you forced me to eat of it, I had to fulfill the oath.

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then Dinarzad said to her sister Shahrazad, “What a strange and entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”


  THE ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTIETH NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  It is related that the steward told the king of China that the guests asked the young man, “What happened to you after that?” and he said:

  When my wounds healed and I recovered, she came to me, and I slept with her. Then I spent the rest of the month with her in the palace until I began to feel depressed, and she finally said to me, “Listen! The caliph’s palace is no place for us to live. The Lady Zubaida has given me fifty thousand dinars. Take some money with you and go and buy us a good house.” Then she gave me ten thousand dinars, and I took them and went out and bought a beautiful house. Then she moved in with me, and for many years we lived like kings until she died. This then is the cause of the cutting off of my thumbs and the washing of my hands.

  After we ate, the party ended and we departed, and afterward I had my adventure with the hunchback.

  The king of China said, “By God, this is not more amazing than the story of the roguish hunchback.” Then the Jewish physician rose and, kissing the ground before the king, said, “O my lord, I have a story to tell, which is more amazing than this one.” The king said, “Let us hear it.”

  But morning overtook Shahrazad, and she lapsed into silence. Then Dinarzad said, “Sister, what a strange and entertaining story!” Shahrazad replied, “What is this compared with what I shall tell you tomorrow night if the king spares me and lets me live!”

  THE ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY-FIRST NIGHT

  The following night Shahrazad said:

  It is related, O King, that the Jew said:

  3. Aromatic root of certain East Indian herbs of the ginger family; “potash”: a crude potassium carbonate obtained from wood or other vegetable ashes.