Love Beyond Words

by Bethany Claire

  “From what, lass? Sitting by the fire all day? ’Tis not good for anyone to sit all day. And ye needn’t worry about crossing paths with yer friend. He’s gone.”

  I started and pulled back in my seat.

  “Gone? What do you mean, he’s gone?”

  “I’ll not lie to ye and tell ye he’s pleased with any of this, but as we spoke with him and tested his powers, he couldna deny their existence. He agreed to join us. He became one of The Eight this afternoon. He’s gone with half the men to train and learn how to use his magic. He willna be back for weeks.”

  Perhaps, I shouldn’t have felt so relieved at Raudrich’s news, but I was. Confrontation had never been my thing, and confrontation with those I loved most was definitely something I shied away from. With Marcus gone, I could move about freely without worrying about his angry glances, and I couldn’t help but be glad about it.

  “Oh. Well, that’s good, I suppose. What’s everyone else doing? There was so much noise earlier, but it’s quiet now.”

  He smiled rather guiltily.

  “They’re gone as well, lass—on their way to the mainland to search for Calder. ’Tis only ye and I,” he hesitated, “and Machara and poor Freya in all of the castle. While I’ve much to worry over, I doona wish to do it this night.”

  He moved his hands from my knees and gathered my hands in his own.

  “Do ye know how long it has been since I’ve had time without duty or obligation, Laurel? I havena had a day to myself in over two years. Please doona make me celebrate this time of freedom all on my own.”

  His excitement made him look much younger than he was—like the young boy inside him was finally getting a chance to peek out for the first time in ages. How could I possibly say no?

  For the first time all day, I smiled.

  “I…I look like a bit of a mess. I’ve been crying, and I’ve worn this same dress for days. It smells of horse.”

  “Not to worry about that, lass. I’ve laid out four of Freya’s gowns for ye. They may be a wee bit short on ye, but no one shall notice that, I assure ye. I’ve also prepared a bath for ye in Marcus’ room.”

  While I knew Freya had no real use for her dresses anymore, it still seemed rather intrusive for me to wear one of them.

  “Is it okay for me to wear one of Freya’s dresses? Do you think she would mind?”

  He smiled and shook his head.

  “No, lass. I asked her. With Nicol gone, I spent some time with her just as soon as the sun went down. I know she will be lonely without him. ’Twas she who suggested it.”

  What a strange life I was living—to be offered up dresses by a ghost.

  “Okay, then. I’ll um…I’ll meet you downstairs when I’m ready.”

  I stood and walked toward the hallway when I heard him call after me.

  “I canna wait, lass. I hope ye know how to dance. The people of this village havena seen me in years. I suspect they’ll throw quite the party in the tavern for me.”

  I didn’t—like, at all. I was far too excited to care.

  Chapter 32

  Raudrich hadn’t lied. While the tavern was nearly empty upon our arrival, it didn’t take long for word to spread that Laird Peyton, as he was known here—I still didn’t know why—was back. Before long, everyone in the village arrived. Raudrich was met with more greetings and hugs than I could count. Within a few minutes, he was pulled away from me.

  I didn’t mind. The people of the village were more than accommodating and I wasn’t alone for a moment. As the hours went by, I danced, talked, and drank with nearly everyone in the village. By the time Raudrich came to collect me, I was dizzy from dancing, stuffed full of food, and had just enough ale in me to make my cheeks rosy and my tongue a little looser than normal. I was in a better humor than I’d been in ages.

  I wished Marcus and Kate were here to see it. I wasn’t sure either of them would recognize this version of me.

  “There ye are. I promise ye ’twas not my intention to abandon ye here on yer own. I knew my arrival would be a festive occasion, but I dinna know just how many people would wish to speak with me. I am verra sorry, Laurel.”

  He stood next to me but leaned in close as he spoke.

  I reached out and gave his arm a gentle squeeze as I smiled at him.

  “It’s okay. Really, it is. I had a great time.”

  He smiled back and surprised me by placing a protective hand on the lower part of my back.

  “I can see that, lass, but do ye mind if we leave now? ’Twas ye I wished to spend my time with, and I havena seen ye at all.”

  “I don’t mind at all. I don’t think my feet could take anymore dancing anyway.”

  He smiled and slowly laced his hand with mine. The gesture surprised me. I wouldn’t have expected him to want to do anything that gave the impression that I was with him, not when Raudrich and I, while undeniably attracted to one another, were still no more than friendly acquaintances. What surprised me even more was that no one in the tavern seemed surprised in the least.

  “Not even with me, lass? I spent the whole night watching ye, and I envied every man that held ye in his arms.”

  The admission sent an anticipatory thrill down my spine, but I waited until we stepped out into the cool Scottish air to answer him.

  “I might have one more dance in me, but if you were watching, you know how bad I am at it. Everyone was so nice, but I know I stepped on every single one of my partners’ toes.”

  The biggest full moon I’d ever seen hung in the sky, making it easy for us to see our way back to Raudrich’s horse.

  He helped me up first then deftly mounted the beast behind me. I was settled into him even more closely than I’d been on the way down to the village, and I didn’t miss how easily he rested his hands on my thighs.

  “Raudrich?”

  “Hmm?” He leaned his chest into my back as he reached for the reins. His face was pressed against my own, and I thought I felt his lips brush against my cheek for the briefest moment, but I couldn’t say for sure.

  “Why do they call you Laird Peyton?”

  “Ah. I forget that ye still know so little about me, lass. Most of The Eight came from humble families, so they were free to use their true names when they pledged their loyalty to Nicol and this Isle. My family owns a large portion of Northern Scotland. My brother was laird there for many years. If it were ever to be known that I abandoned my familial clan and pledged my loyalty to another, it would’ve caused many problems for my brother when he was alive, so I took another name when I came here.

  “While we dinna know it at the time, ’twas good that I did so. When my brother and his wife were murdered, his land was passed to me. I became laird of Allen territory. ’Twas not truly mine by right, as I broke my vows to my familial clan long ago, but because I hid my true name, it allowed me to see my brother’s people settled after his death and to take the time I needed to sign the land over to someone I knew to be trustworthy.”

  “I’m so sorry, Raudrich.”

  He sighed and straightened himself just a little.

  “Thank ye. I dinna know my brother as well as I wish I had. Though, the loss of him was painful, all the same.”

  His tone made it clear it wasn’t something he liked to speak about. I hurried to change the subject.

  “I’ve realized something, Raudrich. I think it is time that I make my peace with being here. I don’t think I’ll ever be going home.”

  He was quiet a long moment. When he did speak, his voice was thoughtful.

  “How do ye feel about that? There must be much that ye left behind. It canna be easy.”

  It was a short ride to the castle gates. I could already see them in front of us.

  “Not the way I should feel about it, probably. I’ll miss my sister dreadfully, but…I don’t know. Would you believe me if I told you that even though I’ve only been here a few days, I feel as if I’m meant to be here? As if this time was meant to be my real home all alon
g?”

  Raudrich pulled on the horse’s reins as we reached the gate. He dismounted quickly and turned to offer me his hands. I allowed him to pull me off and into his arms. Our bodies rubbed against one another as he slowly set me to my feet. He didn’t step away. He stood there with his hands on either side of my ribs as he looked down into my eyes.

  “I told ye last night, lass. ’Tis not only this time I think yer meant for, but this verra castle, as well. I believe ye shall find yer heart here. Mayhap, the love ye’ve always wished for.” Whether it was the tavern ale or my determination to be bold, I didn’t know, but for once in my life, I allowed myself to say the exact thing that was on my mind.

  “And you think you might be that love?”

  He smiled and moved his right hand to the side of my face, cupping it gently as his thumb trailed back and forth across my cheek.

  “I doona believe either of us can say that yet, but whomever captures yer heart shall be lucky to have it. If time shows us that I am that man, I shall wake up every blessed day grateful for it.”

  I was shaking again, and my cheeks were warm from more than just ale.

  “Kiss me then, not because you’re trying to save me from some jealous faerie, but simply because you want to.”

  “What makes ye think that I do want to kiss ye, lass?”

  There was a test in his question. He wanted my certainty, none of the doubt I’d shown him the night before.

  “Oh, you don’t, huh?” I smiled at him so he’d know I wasn’t upset by his question. “I guess I’ll just…” I brushed past him and started to walk away, but he quickly reached for my hand and spun me back toward him.

  “There ye are, lass—a woman who doesna doubt what she does to a man. How long have ye kept her locked away?”

  I answered honestly. “Forever, I think.”

  He leaned in until his lips were nearly touching my own.

  “Please doona ever lock her away again. Allow me to show ye just how powerful she is.”

  His kiss was hungry and demanding as he pulled me against him. I reached for his hair as I leaned into him. I cried out into his mouth as he gently nipped at my lip.

  “The distance to the castle shall seem like an eternity, lass. Best we get the horse to his stable before I doona have the strength to pull away from ye.”

  Just as he broke our kiss, the sound of horses approached and a very American voice spoke out through the darkness.

  “Raudrich, I am going to freaking kill you. Do you know how long it’s taken me to find you?”

  Chapter 33

  Raudrich staggered away from Laurel, his arousal painful in its intensity. Thank God for the darkness. Without it, he would’ve been unable to shield it from view. Shaking his head, he tried to pull himself together and think clearly as the small group of riders approached. He’d been certain he would never see or hear from Sydney again. How could she possibly have found him? As the group of riders came into view, his confusion only grew.

  Pinkie led the group, his wide smile and few teeth making him unmistakable even in the shaded darkness. Next to him rode Sydney—her voice and dark hair the giveaway. The other two riders, he couldn’t yet see.

  “Sydney, lass, what are ye doing here?” He looked over to Pinkie before his friend even had time to respond. “Pinkie? Do ye know Sydney?”

  Pinkie spoke first, quickly dismounting before walking over to shake his hand.

  “It seems yer sight has returned. Ach, I am glad of it, Raudrich. To answer yer question, aye, I know Sydney now, though I dinna a few days ago. I was halfway home when I stopped at a small inn and came across these three. When I heard the description of the man they were looking for, I knew ’twas ye. So, I offered them my assistance, for a price, o’course.”

  He nodded as he shook the man’s hand.

  “Naturally.” He stepped away. He could feel Sydney’s anger at a distance. “Excuse me, Pinkie, I believe I’ve some apologies to make.”

  “Aye, ye do. I dinna know lassies knew such language. I only thought wives got so angry at men, but she swears she doesna love ye in such a way.”

  Ignoring Pinkie, Raudrich hesitantly walked over to Sydney’s horse and extended her his hand.

  “Let me help ye.”

  She crossed her arms and shook her head.

  “No, thank you. I’ve lived in this bloody time long enough to know how to get myself on and off a damn horse. Open the gate. I see no need to dismount before we actually get to the castle. When we do, though, you and I are having a nice, long talk. Alone. Do you understand?”

  He would never say so, but it pleased him that Sydney was angry. It meant she was the true friend he knew her to be.

  “Fine, lass, but who is that ye’ve brought with ye?”

  Both riders brought their horses closer as he mentioned them.

  “Silva?”

  It couldn’t be good that the lass who was meant to be tending to Allen territory was here.

  “’Ello, Raudrich. Once Sydney is done with ye, ’tis I who needs to speak with ye. I’m not so pleased with ye, either.”

  He didn’t recognize the man next to Silva, but the man spoke up as he looked at him.

  “I’ve no need to speak with ye, so ye can relax yer mind a little. Ye may not know me. It has been some time since we last met. I’m Griffith MacChristy.”

  Upon hearing his name, Raudrich could see the resemblance the boy bore to his brothers, but the lad was right. The last time he’d seen young Griffith, the lad had been little more than a boy. Now, he was a strapping beast of a man.

  “Aye, I do know ye. Ye’ve grown.”

  He turned to unlock the gate.

  “Come. All of ye. ’Tis too cold for us to continue this outside.”

  He stood beside the gate allowing the others to ride inside. Understandably, Pinkie hesitated.

  “Last I was here, ye dinna know if ’twas safe. Is it now? I care for ye friend, but I doona care for faeries. If I’m at risk, tell me now, and I will bid ye all goodbye.”

  He smiled and waved the man on through.

  “’Tis fine, lad. I promise to keep ye safe.”

  *

  Raudrich apologized nonstop as we made the short ride up to the castle. It was unneeded. I’d seen the look of surprise on his face at the sound of his friend’s voice. He had no idea they were coming.

  Eventually, I couldn’t bear to listen to him ramble on any further. I reached my hand up behind me to gently cup his face.

  “It’s okay. She clearly really needs to speak with you, or she wouldn’t have come all this way. I’m rather tired anyway. I’ll just slip away to your room when we get inside and leave you to them for the evening.”

  I felt the sharp intake of his breath against my back.

  “Do ye…do ye wish me to stay in Calder’s room, lass?”

  “Definitely not. It’s not like it will be our first time sleeping next to one another.”

  “Ach, thank God, lass. Knowing that I have yer warm arms to look forward to may be all that helps me survive the angry lassies that await me inside the castle. Doona wait up, though. I canna say how long they will keep me.”

  There was no way I would sleep, but I had no intention of letting him know just how much I would be anticipating his return to his bed.

  “Okay, I won’t. Hurry as fast as you can. It’s a cold night. I need you to keep me warm.”

  He groaned and nibbled at my neck as he rode into the stables.

  Chapter 34

  Dread settling in his gut at the angry expression on Sydney’s face, Raudrich carefully closed the door to the sitting room and approached his friend.

  “I know ye are angry with me, but at least give me a hug. I’ve missed ye, lass.”

  She stood with her arms crossed by the fire and stepped away as he reached for her.

  “Don’t touch me. Why did you ignore my letters? Why didn’t you tell me about any of this? I’ve been worried about you for months, Raudrich.
Do you know what I’m going to have to deal with when I get home? Callum is going to be furious with me. I knew he’d never let me leave to go looking for you if I told him. So I wrote to his brother and snuck off with him. I’ve made certain that Callum knew we were safe, but still…he won’t be pleased. I’ve put my life on hold for you, and you’re not even in danger, are you? You just…you just what? Decided to cut me out of your life? That’s not how this works, Raudrich. You don’t get to ghost me. We’re not dating, you bloody imbecile.”

  Seeing that she needed to vent, Raudrich calmly took a seat by the fire and listened as she continued to scream at him.

  “Is it that woman you were kissing? Is that it? You found yourself a girlfriend and decided you didn’t need friends anymore? Is she the one who made you stop responding to my letters? How did I not know you were one of The Eight? Why didn’t you tell me?”

  The longer she screamed, the less angry she sounded. Slowly, her anger turned to tears. The moment she began to cry, Raudrich stood and moved to wrap his arms around her.

  “Ach, Sydney, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I dinna mean to hurt or worry ye. ’Twas my pride that kept me from writing to ye. I dinna wish for ye to know the truth. I worried it would change how ye saw me, and there is none in the world that have such a high opinion of me as ye do.”

  She sniffled, and he tried not to grimace as she shamelessly wiped her nose on his shirt.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Sit down and let me explain everything to ye.”

  With some coaxing, Sydney took her seat by the fire. Slowly, he told her everything—the reason he couldn’t risk writing to her about The Eight and why he stopped writing to her because of his eyesight. When he finished, he couldn’t help but ask her the one question on his mind.

  “Why did ye come here, lass? Even if ye were worried, even if ye were mad, it still doesna explain why ye are here. Not when Silva must’ve told ye some of what she knew when ye arrived in Allen territory.”

  “You’re right. I came here for Silva’s sake. Obviously, I understand why you left in such a hurry now that you’ve explained everything, but you left her with a mess to clean up–one she never asked for. She doesn’t want to be laird, Raudrich. She’s still grieving the death of her husband. Allen territory wasn’t even her home until a few years ago. She’s miserable, and you gave her no choice before you left. You’re going to fix this for her.”