He has turned to me now, eyes piercing through me in that way only he has been able to and I feel a shudder work its way through me from the intensity of his gaze. My body shouldn’t be reacting to his mere presence like this, but I can’t help it. A huge part of me craved Silas like I have never thought I was capable of with him. Not after what he had done.
“You kept everything the same.” He says, gesturing to the room around us and I shake my head to clear the fog of lust suddenly clouding my better judgement. I needed to leave. I just couldn’t. Wasn’t sure I wanted to.
“My mom…” I begin, unsure if I should even be talking right now. My voice comes out hoarse as if I hadn’t used it in too long and I watch his eyes darken as he sensed the raw hunger in my tone. “She knew how much this room meant to me. Even before… Well, there wasn’t much she changed in regard to me when I left and I am glad she didn’t.” I add, body humming with awareness as he starts to move towards me where I am still in the center of the room.
I don’t move a muscle as he prowls towards me like a predator locked on prey. Everything in me screamed, run! I didn’t want too though. I knew it now more than ever. My body was tired of fighting this pull to this man. Maybe I could just… I don’t get to finish that sentence as he reaches me in a few smooth strides. My breath catches as he closes the distance between us, pressing his chest against mine, the first contact I had had with him of an intimate nature since all those years ago. He smells decadent, being this close to me. Something of bergamot and cedarwood… It’s intoxicating.
I hold absolutely still as he raises a hand to my face. When he cups my cheek in his large, warm palm, slightly rough with callouses, I nearly shatter. I close my eyes at this gentle and soft touch as fissures begin to make their way through my mental barriers around my soul and heart as he runs his thumb along the underside of my left eye right atop my cheekbone. I am not proud of the sound that escapes me when my breath exhales from my body as he slowly moves his hand down my cheek and allows his fingers to dance along the column of my neck.
I involuntarily shudder as he brushes his forefinger along my exposed collarbone and when I open my eyes, I find myself staring into deep pools of cerulean, everything about them pulling me into this bottomless ocean of lust. My heart seems to be attempting to pound out of my chest as a dull ache begins to build at the apex of my thighs and I am embarrassed to admit that this was only just due to his touch. He hasn’t even kissed me yet.
“I hold every single memory we ever created together close to my heart, Honey.” He whispers then, his voice rough and drenched in sinful desire and another shudder courses down my spine at the sound. His mouth is barely a fraction of an inch from mine as he leans his head down, forehead brushing against mine.
I am like a bug, trapped in his web as he moves his hand slowly back up my throat and behind my neck at the nape. He runs his fingers through the soft strands of my silky auburn hair before he closes his palm around the nape of my neck. My knees feel weak and it’s a wonder how I am even still standing. Tiny tremors are wreaking havoc on me at his touch, his nearness, and the depth of emotion in his breath-taking eyes.
“Nothing I will ever do in this life will ever make up for what I did to you, I know this. Let me give you this. Let me make this another first in the long list of things I plan on doing for you to make up for how I betrayed you.” He murmurs against my lips, barely touching them and I am not sure what he means by this but I doubt I can reject anything right now nor do I really want to. So, instead, I raise a shaking hand up, running it over the hard planes of his chest slowly before bringing it up to cup the nape of his neck. Just like he held me now.
“Yes.” My words are barely above a whisper as I breathe out against his skin and he doesn’t hesitate for another second. When his lips finally meet mine, it’s like coming home again after a long day of hard work to find the love of your life there to catch you when you fall from exhaustion.
My knees buckle from the emotional blow of it all, but he doesn’t let me fall. As he devoured my mouth, tongue sweeping in to tangle with mine in a demanding dance of passion and guilt and sadness, he lifted me against his hard body. The world falls away as wave after wave of heartbreak, loneliness, and anger rush out of me in a giant tsunami.
The dam breaks and before I know it, I am clinging to Silas King like my life depends on it. Before I know it, my back is hitting something soft and I know without looking he has laid me out on the nearby sofa, the same one we had spent that magical day watching tv together all those years ago. My body is a river of molten lava and I gasp against his mouth as he boldly slips a hand up my stocking clad thigh and underneath my black lace dress.
The sound that rumbles out of him against my mouth only drives the heat higher. Silas wasn’t the same, fumbling, and nervous thirteen-year-old boy I had lost my virginity to. He was a man. A man of many talents it seemed as his hand pushed my dress up to expose my toned upper body and perky breasts, clad in a tempting black lace strapless bra.
He groans, long and deep as he pulls back to feast his eyes on me, appreciating the fact that I was no longer the partially chubby thirteen-year-old I had once been. His eyes darken even further if that is at all possible and a tiny thrill shoots through me at the raw hunger burning in the depths.
“So, fucking beautiful. So perfect.” He growls out as he lowers his head back to my chest this time. My head tosses back as he tugs down the cup of my bra and fastens his hot mouth against the tight bud of my nipple on my left breast. He makes a hungry sound as he laps at my flesh, teeth scraping against all the right places and sending bolts of pure pleasure straight to my throbbing clit. My hands find their way into his silky hair, anchoring him to my breast, encouraging him to keep going.
My hips buck up against the thigh he has wedged between mine and a low moan slips out of me and I don’t bother to stop it. I didn’t care much if anyone heard. Let them. Let them hear all the wicked sounds coming out of me brought forth by Silas King and his wonderfully, wicked mouth. I was already so wet, the fabric of my thong and stockings damp and I didn’t care if I was rubbing the evidence all over his suit pants.
Pulling his head back after a few moments of his delicious assault on my nipple, he presses a firm hand down on my toned stomach to stop the thrusting of my hips against his well-defined thigh. A desperate whine that I am not proud of slips out of me unbidden and he chuckles against the skin of my throat as he runs his lips up, skimming them along my jawline as he brings his mouth back to my lips. He kisses me for a long moment and I start to think about killing him if he doesn’t do something soon before he is pulling back to gaze down at me again.
“I’m not going to have sex with you, Honey.” He says, and for a moment, it feels as if someone has thrown a bucket of cold water onto me. I look at him in utter disbelief, but before I can say anything, he continues. “But I am going to taste you. Make you come all over my face and flood my mouth with your sweet cream. I’ve been waiting ten long years to do this.” His crass words have me sucking in a sharp breath, the confusion leaving my body as anticipation and desperate desire wash over me once again.
He chuckles, dark and full of lust as he releases the cup on my bra and lifts the hand on my stomach. Before I can even process, he is grabbing me by my hips with both hands and flipping me over so that I am face down with my ass presented up for him. A shot of adrenaline and liquid heat rushes straight to my core at this and a low, breathy gasp escapes me as he wastes no time slipping his fingers in the waistband of my stockings and thong and pulling them down my legs to come rest around my ankles with my boots still on.
“You smell so good, Honey. Sweet, like your namesake.” He groans as I feel his face come within a few inches of my weeping cunt. I whimper and shift on my knees, widening myself even further for him to have better access. A rumble of approval comes out of him and I feel it in my bones as he takes his first lick of me.
His fingers dig into the fleshy globes of m
y ass as he spreads me further. His hot tongue sweeps over me in three, smooth, long strokes that have me damn near creaming right then and there. I cry out when his tongue stabs into my cunt over and over, ever so slowly, and between the action and the rough growl that tumbles out of him, it causes a heat so intense to shoot through me, there is no doubt in my mind he just got a mouthful of that sweet cream he said he was dying to fill him up.
The more he thrusts his tongue inside my tight channel, the more the pleasure begins to heighten inside of me. Every nerve ending is on fire and I feel like I am two seconds from being ripped apart by the sheer magnitude of the orgasm quickly rushing towards me. Pants wheeze out of me as I press my face against the worn material of the sofa beneath us and squeeze my eyes shut against the assault of pleasure ripping through me.
His grip on my ass cheeks tightens as he brings his mouth up to my throbbing clit, and somehow I just know that I’m going to have bruises in the shape of Silas King’s hands. This thought makes my core tighten in anticipation of what’s coming. I cry out again when he fastens his mouth around the bundle of nerves and my thighs begin to shake of their own accord as my looming climax causes all my muscles to spasm throughout my entire body. His teeth scrape along my clit and his tongue swirls in a perfect circle around me.
Just as he shifts his face to slide a finger inside of me and crook it upward to stroke my g-spot, I see stars and my orgasm slams into me so hard and so fast, I am not able to stop the earth-shattering scream that rips out of me, only barely muffled by the sofa beneath us. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I hear the door handle jiggle after a loud knock, but my soul has left my body and I can’t even begin to function enough to go and find it.
I vaguely feel him lapping hungrily at me as he catches every last drop of my release before he gently pulls back and pulls my thong and stockings back up. Still in a state of utter shock and bliss, I sink down onto my belly and work on getting my breathing under control and my vision back in check. Orgasms that powerful shouldn’t be a thing, right? How is it that another man can do the same exact thing to me and I am not nearly as satisfied as I am now with Silas?
I feel Silas shift over me and then he is also pulling down the fabric of my dress from where it was still partially bunched up around my midsection. An odd feeling that I can’t quite decipher falls over me then and I find myself slowly sitting up after several long moments in silence. When I do, I brave a glance over at Silas. I expect to see a look of pure male satisfaction on his face that he had been able to pull one over on me.
What I didn’t expect was the look of utter love and sadness reflected in his eyes. It was like a slap to the face and I actually flinched back from it. Tears threaten to fall then and I wonder if it’s because of the shit day this has been so far or it is because I was beginning to feel things again for Silas that I promised myself I would never feel again. He owned my entire heart and I wasn’t sure if I could handle that right now.
I feel him brush his fingertips along my cheek and when I glance back over at him, I see an understanding there I didn’t quite understand myself. His smile is soft, so full of longing and desire that it makes my breath catch. If this moment, of what we had just shared together, wasn’t enough to show me just how much Silas really cared for me and loved me, I don’t know what was.
Instead of getting his dick wet like I had kind of expected him too, he had taken care of me. Made this about me and only me and he wasn’t even expecting anything in return. He had even said as much before he had even put his mouth on me. My heart ached as he stared into my eyes and ran his thumb over the seam of my swollen lips and I felt a tear slip out of me before I could stop it.
He catches it before it can fall and brings it to his mouth, sucking the tiny salty droplet of liquid into his wicked mouth as he stared right back at me. My lip’s part and I run my tongue along the bottom one and another flicker of sadness crosses his expression. He looked so raw and vulnerable in this moment and it made the ache in my chest that much more painful because I absolutely hated seeing that expression on his beautiful face.
“I never want to be the cause of your pain again, Honey. Never again.” He whispers softly and it breaks me. I feel another small round of tears fall and I reach for his hand, I squeeze it lightly and nod in understanding. “It will take time, Silas. Time. All I ask is that you listen to me when I speak and respect whatever I may say. The wounds you helped create did not heal properly and being back here, in this room, has reopened many different emotions.” I look over at him and I know my own sadness is showing. But I see a flicker of hope in his deep brilliant blue eyes, a sight I have not seen since we were kids.
He gives me a small half smile, it’s warm and gentle, and says, “Honey, I will give you all the time that I have left on this Earth. Every bit of it belongs to you.” He lays my hand down in my lap and stands. Adjusting himself, he bends down and cups my cheek softly and kisses the top of my head before quietly opening the door to make sure whoever was there was gone and slips out with a wink over his shoulder.
I somehow manage to make it through the rest of the wake with minimal complications. I know something is up with Finley when I join him after my little encounter with Silas and he won’t even look me in the eye. He answers my questions and talks when being talked to, but he has definitely withdrawn.
I remember soon enough why. When Silas and I had been otherwise preoccupied, someone had knocked on the study door and had tried to open it and I had a niggling suspicion that it had been Finley coming to check on me. He had probably seen Rebecca return to the wake and when I didn’t follow, he must’ve gotten worried.
Part of me wonders if I should feel guilty when I clearly don’t. Even though I had never asked him, he had come here to be there for me in a time of need and this is how I treat him? Finley knows the score though, A tiny voice in the back of my head whispers to me and I sigh as I slip my hands in the water and swirl the lavender scented bubbles around while I took a long hot bath later that night.
I heard my door open and close in the other room and I knew it had to be Finley. He had said he was going for a walk around the property even though it was after eight in the evening and I hadn’t bothered to question him. There were half a dozen new security guards manning the fence around my property so I wasn’t really concerned about anyone nabbing him in the middle of the night on my property.
A few seconds later, Finley knocks on my open bathroom door and when I glance over, he averts his eyes. Frowning, I sit up slightly in the tub while still keeping my freshly stitched up and wrapped ankle out of the water. He looks slightly embarrassed and it confuses me.
“Finley? You can come in. It’s not like it isn’t anything you haven’t seen before.” I say cautiously and he hesitates.
“Would your boyfriend be pleased if I did? The guy is really scary, Honey. I definitely don’t want to tango with him if he finds out I was spying on his naked bathing girlfriend.” My mouth pops open at this and he still hovers in the doorway, not looking at me.
“Who told you Silas King was my boyfriend?” I swear to God if he went and cornered Finley after our moment together and warned him away from me thus sending him the wrong impression, I was going to kill him.
“Well, no one, but… I’m sorry, Honey. When that woman and her husband returned to the wake and you never did, I went looking for you…” He trails off, his cheeks flaming in embarrassment and it suddenly dawns on me what must be running through his head right now.
“Finley… I never meant-”
“It’s okay, Honey. Really. I just didn’t want you to get uncomfortable or to have him go feral on me because I overstepped a line.” He says with total sincerity and it totally throws me off. I had planned this whole speech for Finley to try and explain to him why he would need to return home and why we couldn’t see each other anymore. I never expected it to be so easy, I was a bit concerned by how easy it was to be honest.
“Silas wouldn’t go
after you.” I say as I start to get out of the bath. I needed to get out and get dressed so he and I could have a proper conversation about this. I liked Finley and respected him. He deserved an explanation even though he didn’t appear to need or want one. I wrap a towel around myself when I finally manage to get out without slipping and falling using only one leg and he finally looks up once I am covered. I want to laugh at that, but I don’t. He had always been a gentleman and I shouldn’t mock him for it.
“If I was your boyfriend and I had heard that another man had walked in on you naked and bathing, I would definitely be throwing fists.” He decides to point out and I shake my head, a light laugh escaping me before I could stop it.
“He wouldn’t go after you because he and I aren’t dating.” I elaborate and limp over to the double sink vanity in my bathroom to brush my teeth and do my skin care routine before bed.
“But… I heard…” He trails off, sounding awkward and I glance over at him as I shove my toothbrush in my mouth. He doesn’t continue his sentence and I finish up with my teeth before spitting and rinsing. I pause another moment before I answer him.
“You and I have done those things many times and we aren’t dating. Never have.” I point out after an awkward pause and he considers this.
“So, uh, you were just…” He begins, a cute flush turning his cheeks a bright pink and I chuckle.
“Silas and I have a lot of baggage.” I say after I pause again, looking at myself in the mirror as I think about what I want to say. “He was the main reason why I didn’t do relationships.” I explain, not sure why I feel the need to explain myself to him. Maybe it was partially because I hadn’t let myself think or talk about it for an awfully long time?
“Because he betrayed you. It’s what made you leave here.” He surmises and I nod.
Whiskey & Honey: Crimes of Crimson Valley: Book One Page 11