Back to the Heart

by Sky Corgan

  But now was the question of where they went from here. They would keep things rated PG until he returned from his trip. Then what? Would they date like normal people? Could she hope to have a life with him? Or would he stick around until he’d had enough of her and then float away on the wind?

  The thought that she would have to see him for breakfast, and every meal after, made butterflies gather in Ana’s stomach. It was hard to sort out her thoughts and feelings when he was so close. But at the same time, she was glad for this time with him. Things would certainly be different when he was gone.

  Ana took a deep breath as she finished fixing her hair into pigtails and prepared to go downstairs for breakfast. Today would be the first day of returning to life the way it had been before she’d left for New York. She had Celia’s duties to pick up now, feeding the chickens and gathering eggs and tending to the garden. These past five years had not prepared her for a life of physical labor, but she would adjust soon enough. After all, it wasn’t the first time.

  Ana peeked around the corner of the dining room. Until today, Ryan had always beaten her to the table in the morning. But to her surprise, it was just her mother in the kitchen, frying potatoes on the stove.

  “Morning,” Molly said over her shoulder as Ana walked to the refrigerator to pour herself a glass of milk.

  “Morning,” she replied, feeling nervous.

  While Ana knew her mother would be elated if she and Ryan did start dating, she wasn’t sure exactly how to bring it up. It was obvious the woman suspected something was going on between them. When Ana had come in from the barn last night, Molly had been sitting in the living room watching television. She’d looked up at Ana with a mischievous smirk and asked, “Have fun?” It had been all Ana could do to keep the heat of her embarrassment from burning her up.

  Today, though, Molly seemed to be all out of suspicions. Her mind was likely on the day’s work. Life had been a lot more relaxed for her since Ryan had been around, but she still had things to attend to, such as milking the cows and feeding the few barnyard animals they kept mainly as pets now that Ana’s father had passed on.

  “I’m surprised you’re up this early,” Molly commented as she used a spatula to transfer the potatoes onto a plate.

  “I don’t have a choice. Got to start getting used to things around here again.” Ana stole a potato from the plate with a childish grin before grabbing the place settings and retreating to the dining room to help her mother set up for breakfast.

  The minutes ticked by. Ryan seemed to be running late for breakfast, which only made things worse. Ana wasn’t sure how she should act around him now that so much had changed between them.

  “Go ahead and eat before the food gets cold,” Molly told her, and Ana nodded and made herself a plate, trying to concentrate. It was hard when her mind was so stuck on Ryan Black.

  She was just about to ask where he was when the front door opened and closed. Moments later, he rounded the corner with a smile on his face, walking straight over to her and kissing her on top of the head. Molly beamed at them as Ana’s cheeks flushed. With that one sweet action, he had made it clear that they had taken things beyond friendship. She just hoped her mother didn’t have anything snarky to say about it.

  “Have a good sleep, Sunshine?” Molly asked instead.

  “Not as good as usual,” he confessed.

  “Just a lot on my mind.” Ryan grabbed his plate and filled it with eggs, potatoes, and two biscuits before sitting down next to Ana.

  Ana’s blush deepened. Even though she had been waiting for him all morning, she suddenly felt speechless, like the words had dried up in her mouth. Thankfully, her mom was there to pick up the slack.

  “What’s on your mind?”

  Ryan cast a cautious glance at Ana before he spoke. “Ana has agreed to let me contact a lawyer friend of mine about starting a defamation lawsuit against the guy who fired her.”

  “Oh? This is news to me.” Molly’s eyes fixed on Ana.

  “It was my idea,” Ryan interceded. “We just talked about it last night, so it’s not like it was planned or anything. But anyway”—he turned his attention back to Ana—“I spoke to Elias last night—that’s the lawyer—and I gave him your information, or rather, told him what you told me. He wants you to give him a call. Here’s his number.” Ryan pulled a card from his pocket and handed it to Ana.

  She took it gingerly, gazing down at the card. “He’s in New York,” she noted.

  “Yes. He said you’ll probably be able to settle things outside of court.”

  “Are you sure this is a good idea?” Molly stared across the table at them.

  Even Ana wasn’t sure. She wanted the whole thing to be over, but Rick was making that nearly impossible by giving her bad job references, and it would be difficult to explain a five-year gap in employment. At her age, taking that long off work while not attending college just made her look lazy. If nothing else, the defamation lawsuit felt like a necessary evil.

  “It’s better than allowing him to walk all over her and who knows how many other people. Besides, if she wins, and she will win, Ana will be able to recoup lost wages and moving costs. Plus, she’ll have the peace of mind of knowing that she didn’t just allow herself to be a victim.” Ryan was in business mode. In fact, Ana had never seen him so serious before. She liked what he was saying. Taking on Rick Fasken would make her feel empowered.

  “But we can’t afford a lawyer.” Molly knitted her eyebrows together.

  “Ryan is paying for it,” Ana piped in.

  “You are? How?”

  “I’m not as broke as I look,” he teased.

  Ana could tell her mother didn’t believe Ryan, that she thought he was just getting Ana’s hopes up. But instead of arguing about it, she turned to Ana and said, “You call that lawyer and see what he has to say. Then you talk to me about it, you hear?” She pointed her fork at Ana. “I don’t want to be left in the dark about this.”

  “You won’t be.” Ana shook her head with a smile.

  “Good. I’m still not sure this is such a good idea. You’ve been under so much stress lately as it is. And you’re going to have to fly back to New York. That takes money too. Not to mention, you’ll have to see that asshole again.” The hatred for Rick Fasken was clear in her voice.

  “I’ll take care of all the expenses. Don’t worry about that,” Ryan told them.

  Ana had never even considered that she’d have to see Rick again. The very thought made her skin crawl. She flipped the card over, her appetite depleting as the what-ifs took up space inside her mind.

  Sensing her doubt, Ryan placed a hand on top of hers. “Don’t stress out about this. Nine times out of ten, it doesn’t go to court. Basically, you’ll call Elias and give him all the details of what happened and a list of the places you applied to so that he can call to confirm that Rick gave you a bad reference. Those potential employers can also serve as witnesses. Then he’ll talk to you about what you want, your demands. He’ll investigate the case and send a demand letter to Rick. If Rick agrees to the demands, the case will be settled. If he doesn’t agree, then Elias will file a lawsuit. But I’m pretty sure Rick will agree, because it takes a lot less money and effort to settle outside of court than it does to go to court, and if your witnesses are solid, he won’t take it to court knowing that he’ll lose. No smart man would.”

  “Good Lord, you know a lot about the law.” Molly gawked at him.

  Ana was impressed as well, though she still felt uneasy. “I’ll give Elias a call,” she said weakly, if nothing else than to satiate Ryan’s desire to help her.

  “Good.” Ryan smiled at her.

  “You sure know a lot about a lot of stuff, Sunshine.” Molly’s mood had lightened up.

  “I like to know things.” He wrinkled his nose at her before taking a bite of the potatoes. “This is delicious, Molly, as always.”

  “Thanks. You really have been a godsend, you know that? A real godsend.�
��

  “Mom, stop,” Ana whined, embarrassed, even if what she had said was true. He was like an angel who had blown into both of their lives at just the right time. The thought of having to be without him when he went on his business trip was miserable.

  “Well, I’m just saying.” Molly shrugged. “He comes here just when Celia is about to get married, fixes a bunch of stuff around the house, picks up a lot of the chores, doesn’t ask for hardly anything in return, and now he’s offering to pay for your legal stuff. I wish there was something more we could do for you.” She looked over at Ryan.

  “You’ve done plenty by allowing me to stay here.” He gave her a grin.

  “You could let him move into the house.” Ana’s body went rigid even as she suggested it. While her mother might be snarky and a loudmouth, she was also very old-fashioned. When Ana and Celia were growing up, Molly had never allowed boys to stay the night or be alone with them in their bedrooms with the door closed. The only reason she hadn’t invited Ryan to stay inside the house yet had nothing to do with thinking that he would steal something and more to do with the thought that he’d end up in either Celia’s or Ana’s bed. Not that making him sleep out in the barn had kept him away from Ana, but it made Molly feel like she was doing her motherly duty to protect her daughters’ virtue.

  The room was silent for several moments before Ryan finally spoke. “That’s not necessary. I’m content staying in the barn.” And with that, the tension left the air in a sigh.

  “See. He’s fine in the barn,” Molly said for good measure.

  “But anyway, I should finish up here and get to work.” Ryan shoveled a forkful of scrambled eggs into his mouth.

  “What’s on your agenda today?” Ana glanced at him.

  “After I check on the cattle, probably just finish up the fence posts. What about you?”

  “I have egg duty.” Her eyes widened to show how not excited about it she was.

  “And garden duty.” Molly gestured at her with her fork again.

  “And garden duty,” she sighed.

  “And after that?” Ryan asked.

  “And after that, I have to catch up on my knitting.”

  “You knit?” He seemed surprised.

  “I do. It’s been a while though, so right now I’m just working on a scarf for the baby.”

  “A scarf. In Texas.” Ryan let out a short laugh.

  “It’s a good practice piece,” she insisted with a frown.

  “I’m sure it’s going to be a gorgeous scarf.” He tried to stifle his smirk, but it didn’t work too well.

  “I could show you, if you like.” Ana gestured toward the stairs, her heart skipping a beat at the thought of having Ryan alone again.

  “I’d like to see it.” He caught her desire and threw it right back at her.

  “Don’t dally around up there too long. There’s work to be done.” Molly glared at them before she stood to take their plates to the sink.

  It took everything in Ana to hide a mischievous grin as she led Ryan upstairs and into her room. As they neared her door, her body came to life with the memory of having his hands on her, his lips on her skin, his body pressed against her. It was way too early to be this aroused, and yet here she was, wishing she could ditch her chores for a morning spent in his arms.

  Instead of turning to him the second they reached her room, Ana took long strides to the chair that faced her bedroom window where her ball of yarn and knitting needles were lying. She picked up the tiny scarf and held it up to him.

  “Wow. You knitted that whole thing while you were watching me from your window the other day.”

  “I wasn’t watching you.” She tossed the almost-completed scarf back down onto the chair with a huff.

  “Sure you weren’t.” He was all smiles, stepping up to her and placing his hands on her waist while he gazed at her. Already, her body was heating up from his touch. This was the intimacy her mother had feared.

  “We can’t,” she whispered, avoiding his eyes in fear that he would seduce her into surrender. Just a look had her stomach flopping with anticipation.

  “We aren’t. Just a kiss. That’s all I want.” While his mouth spoke one thing, his body told of deeper desires. Still, Ana couldn’t deny that she wanted to taste his lips just as badly as he craved the taste of hers.

  “Just a kiss,” she agreed, looking up at him through heavy lashes.

  And what a kiss it was.

  Ryan’s mouth met Ana’s with such passion that she felt dizzy. His hand slid up the nape of her neck, tangling in her hair, and she reciprocated with equal fervor, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. They clung to each other like lovers weathering a storm, holding on with such desperation that when they finally broke apart, Ana was breathless.

  It was never enough when it came to him. Never. One taste, and she was lost.

  “Just one kiss.” She didn’t believe her own words, but her mother would eventually come to end their romantic moment, so it was better to push him away now.

  “It’s not that easy, is it?” he said in a husky voice. Ryan seemed ready to be kissed again, like he was just waiting for her to give him permission.

  “I think we need to . . .” She stepped away from him, distancing herself so that the heat between them could die down.

  “That’s probably for the best.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at the ground, trying to help break the spell.

  Awkward silence filled the space between them, but Ana’s mind was going wild with thought. One in particular stuck with her. She had been wondering about it ever since she first realized how great a catch Ryan was.

  “How are you not married yet?” Surely, he could have any woman he wanted. And then the dread hit her. That probably was the reason he wasn’t married yet. He didn’t need to be.

  Ryan sat down on the bed, looking contemplative.

  “I’ve always known what I wanted in life. Indecision has never been a part of who I am. And I’ve always known that when I saw the one, there would be no question in my mind.”

  “So you haven’t found the one yet?” Ana’s heart sank.

  He stared straight at her, his expression serious. “I’m looking at her right now.”

  Warm emotions flooded through her then, and she couldn’t stop the ear-to-ear grin. That was the most romantic thing anyone had ever told her. The thought that he could be her one and only was more than she could have ever hoped for. But was it realistic? They were from two different worlds. And there was still so much not right with the picture.

  “But I’m pregnant . . . with another man’s child.” Her smile waned as reality brought her back down from the euphoric high.

  “Why would that matter, unless you don’t think I’m father material?”

  And just like that, the smile was back in place. He was willing to take on her child. Ryan had hinted at it before, but the way he said it now . . .

  He stood then, approaching her and taking her hands in his. The heat was still in his eyes, but it was softened by affection. And despite herself, Ana knew that there would be many more kisses before they left the room.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  The smoldering look in Ryan’s eyes had Ana backing away from him. He had turned the tables on her, circling her like an animal circled prey, before he pounced and set her world on fire with his kiss. Now they were moving toward the bed, and Ana was both afraid and excited about what would happen when they got there.

  Ryan had promised they wouldn’t have sex before he left for his trip, but things like this made it so difficult for the both of them. Maybe she should have never brought him up into her room.

  Ana craned her neck for Ryan’s kisses, wrapping her hands around him as he nibbled a path down her throat and over to her ear and then tugged gently on her earlobe. His fingertips were already making their way up the front of her shirt, reaching for her silk bra and sliding under the cups to tease her taut peaks. Ana had to keep her moaning at a mini
mum to avoid detection from her mother downstairs. She was worried about being caught, but the thought also thrilled her. What would her mother think if she saw Ana and Ryan together like this?

  All she wanted was to feel his hands on her skin, his lips on her neck, his arousal pressed between her legs. He was very aroused. It made Ana feel sexy knowing that she did this to him, made him unable to control himself around her. They had both lost control in the heat of the moment. And now here they were, necking on her bed like two hormone-crazed teenagers.

  “It kills me that I have to wait to be inside of you,” he breathed as he kissed a path back up to her lips.

  It was killing her too. Already, Ana was wet with want for Ryan. Nothing would please her more than to have him undress her and take her right here on her bed in her mother’s house.

  “We can’t,” she managed to get out before he claimed her mouth again. But even as she said it, she deepened the kiss and slipped her hands up under his shirt to feel the firm muscle beneath. Good God, did he have an amazing body. And she could barely wait to see the rest of it.

  “I know. It’s so hard, though.” He pushed her shirt up over her breasts, pulling the cups of her bra down to take one of her nipples between his lips.

  Ana stifled back a moan as carnal need overwhelmed her. For as much as she wanted to stop him, she couldn’t. It just felt too good, his tongue circling her swollen peak, his teeth moving in to tug on it and send shivers of pleasure straight to her nether region. All she could do was thread her fingers in his hair and hold him against her.

  When he tried to pull her shirt over her head, she had to draw the line.

  “No. I’m sorry.” She shook her head. “Not here.”

  Instead of looking disappointed, as Ana had expected, Ryan was understanding, allowing her shirt to fall back down.

  The more they kissed, though, the more she regretted not being back in the barn. Her body was greedy. She wanted to undress him just as badly as he seemed to want to undress her, to see his naked flesh, to taste his skin. And then she got an idea.