by Brook Wilder
“I was saving this for my retirement but I think we both could use this right about now.” The sheriff popped open the lid and took a big swig before handing the bottle to Jackrabbit. He took it reluctantly at first, and then gratefully took a pull from the amber liquid, relishing the burn as it swept through him.
“So, my grandchild’s father is going to be called Bunny Rabbit. No, I won’t accept that.” Donohue shook his head, grabbing the bottle back and taking another shot of the strong whisky.
“It’s Jackrabbit.” He replied dryly. “But you can call me John. John Dawes.”
“John.” The sheriff nodded. “Now that’s a much better name.” His eyes were sharp as knives. “So, John, what are you going to do?”
“Everyone keeps asking me that.” Jackrabbit said, the words leaving his mouth before he could stop him, “And the only answer I can come up with is, well, whatever Rachael wants me to.” Jackrabbit shrugged. It was the simple truth. He didn’t have the answers, but he knew he wanted to do whatever he needed to make this work.
Sheriff Donohue nodded as if he’d said the right thing. About damn time, Jackrabbit thought silently. I don’t think I could handle another sucker punch from this guy.
“Listen, there’s something you need to know about Rachael. I know we’ve never been the closest but I know that girl better than she knows herself. It’s hard for her to trust people. After her mother left…” The sheriff trailed off for a moment, shaking his head and taking another swig from the bottle before passing it back to Jackrabbit.
“After her mother left, she changed. Shut everybody out. It hurt her so bad that she decided she would rather never let anyone close to her than risk getting hurt by it again. You understand what I’m saying, John?”
“I think so, Sheriff.”
“Hell, call me Tom.” The other man said. Jackrabbit took a sip of whisky as he continued, “What I’m saying is that Rachael is a hell of a lot more fragile than she looks. She goes after the world in a fearless way but it’s a mask. She’d deny it to her dying breath, but the truth is that girl is scared to let herself love. And she’s scared to let anyone love her. She’s afraid if she opens up even a little bit, she’ll get hurt the same way she has been in the past.”
“I understand, sir.” Jackrabbit said, thinking over the insight he’d just gained into Rachael’s inner workings. Her trust issues. Well, she’s not the only one with those. They were like two damaged peas in a pod but what the hell was he going to do about it?
“I’m not going to give you my blessing.” Sheriff Donohue finally said after a long moment, “I don’t know you well enough and what I do know doesn’t really inspire any great confidence in me. But it means a lot, you having the balls to come here and tell me face to face. My daughter’s been avoiding me for the past month and now I know why.”
Jackrabbit didn’t know what to say to that so he did the only thing he could do. He raised the bottle of amber whisky in the sheriff’s direction and took a long, burning drink.
CHAPTER TEN
Rachael stared wide-eyed around the small, too-white doctor’s office. She should be used to it. She’d been coming to the same office for almost six months now, but it still made her feel nervous to be there.
She looked down at her belly, rubbing it to calm herself. It was more prominent now and her gray cotton T-shirt now strained against her stomach. As she laid her hands across her middle she felt the tiny kicks. Rachael gasped, her nerves momentarily forgotten as wonder filled her. That was her baby. Kicking and moving inside her. Oof, and pressing right up on her bladder.
Rachael shifted once more on the exam table. She glanced at the oversized clock on the wall. It had only been a moment ago that Dr. Ostara obstetrician had left the room but it felt like hours had passed while she lied there, impatient and waiting. All she could do was think.
The last six months had been a whirlwind. Since she found out about the pregnancy and decided to have the baby, her entire world had flipped upside down. No longer was she the party hard troublemaker of Mayville. No. Now, she was the pariah of Mayville.
Most of the members of the small town had started to look at her suspiciously as her belly started to grow more and more noticeable. That was when the rumors had started up. Rumors about her, rumors about who the father of the baby was. Sly remarks and side-eyed glances. Rachael had tried to ignore them all, just as she always had, but for some reason it was getting harder and harder to.
It didn’t help that she couldn’t exactly set the record straight about the father. She could just imagine it. Oh, you want to know who the daddy is? Well, he’s none other than Johnny Dawes, AKA Jackrabbit AKA the president of the same criminal biker gang that’s been stealing livestock and causing general mayhem around town. Do I think he’ll be good father material? Of course I do. He’s already picked out the baby seat for the back of his bike.
Rachael looked at the clock again. Thoughts of Jackrabbit had her nerves rushing back. Where the hell was he? He’d promised he was going to be there for the check-up. Well, she’d waited as long as she could and still there was no sign of him.
She ground her teeth for a moment as doubts bubbled up inside her, then forced herself to stop, forced herself to take a deep breath. She could do this alone, Rachael reminded herself fiercely. She’d done things alone her whole life. She certainly didn’t need anyone to hold her hand now.
Rachael squeezed her fingers together, curling them into fists, oddly aware of how empty they felt without Jackrabbit’s hand in them.
“Alright, Rachael, everything from the test came back normal, you and your baby are both perfectly healthy.” Dr. Ostara said, her deep cheerful voice breaking through Rachael’s panicked thoughts.
“That’s a relief.” Rachael released the breath that had been pent up inside her since Dr. Ostara had first left the room.
“Now, have you given any thought to what we talked about at your last checkup? What about post birth care? I know a wonderful pediatrician that’s not too far from here. I can give you his number.”
Rachael nodded quickly, folding her arms once more protectively over her rounded middle. “Yes that would be great. Thank you.”
“And you’re making sure to eat healthy? Sticking to the foods I laid out for you? And getting plenty of sleep?” Dr. Ostara asked one question after another in rapid fire.
“Who are you, my dad?” She asked, sarcasm edging her voice. Ever since Jackrabbit had spilled the beans about her pregnancy, her father, the stoic Sheriff of Mayville, had all but tripped over himself trying to wait on her hand and foot, constantly pestering her about eating, sleeping and everything in between.
“No, I’m even worse. I’m your doctor,” Dr. Ostara nodded her heads towards Rachael’s swollen belly, “And I’m that baby’s doctor. It’s my job to make sure you are both taken care of.” She softened her words with a kind hearted smile, continuing after a moment. “Well, Rachael, are you ready?”
Rachael glanced nervously again at the clock. It was still steadily ticking away the time, seconds and minutes and hours, and Jackrabbit still wasn’t here. Finally, Rachael glanced over at the doctor and reluctantly nodded her head to proceed. She couldn’t wait any longer. If he wasn’t there, then he wasn’t there. There wasn’t anything else she could do about it but continue on with why she was there in the first place.
Dr. Ostara gave her a look with one black eyebrow arched but didn’t say another word as she began to set up the ultrasound machine. Buttons clicked and beeps punctuated the silence, Rachael’s mind wandered back to Jackrabbit again despite her best intentions.
She couldn’t help but wonder where he was at. What he was doing. Rachael knew a little bit about what was going on between him and his old friend turned enemy, Finn. Over the past months, he’d been spending more and more time at the clubhouse to deal with this person. But it didn’t seem to be getting better as far as she could tell. If anything, Jackrabbit seemed even more stressed out tha
n usual.
But whenever she asked about it, all she could get out of him was terse, one word answers that didn’t really tell her anything all except that he didn’t want to discuss it with her. That message she got loud and clear.
Once more, her thoughts had the doubts she tried to keep buried deep inside rising up to the surface. In some ways they were closer than ever. She was basically living at his place. It wasn’t all that much bigger, but he’d said he hated the idea of her and the baby living above the rowdy dive bar.
She just wished he would open up and tell her what was going on. A text or phone call to let her know he wasn’t going to make the doctor’s appointment. Rachael rolled her eyes at the thought. It’s not entirely his fault, a soft inner voice whispered and she had to reluctantly agree.
As much time as Jackrabbit had been away at the club dealing with whatever was going on with Finn or distracted with club business, she had been cramming to prepare for her interview. A few weeks after the phone interview with the company in Houston, she’d received a call telling her that they had been impressed with her resume and wanted her to come into the city to interview in person.
At first she’d been ecstatic. But with the stress of the baby and trying to prepare for the interview at the same time, she started throwing up walls between herself and Jackrabbit.
Then there was that other thought. The one that she couldn’t shake no matter how hard she tried.
The thought that in the end, Jackrabbit would choose the Roadburners over her, that all of this was just another case of someone who used her, made her care, and then left her. Only this time, it wasn’t just her who’d be left alone, it was her baby too. Their baby.
“Okay, Rachael. It’s time.” Dr. Ostara said softly, interrupting her troubled thoughts. Rachael nodded and lied back on the bed once more. She took a deep breath and tried to make herself relax as Dr. Ostara applied the ultrasound gel on her belly.
“That’s it.” Dr. Ostara placed the plastic wand over her belly, “Just lay back and take one more big breath in, and exhale nice and slow. There you go.” A moment later, a grainy black and white image appeared on the screen.
“There’s the baby.” Dr. Ostara pointed to the steady beating dot in the center, “And that’s the baby’s heart right there.”
“Oh my god.” Rachael gasped, her eyes brimming with tears. “That’s my baby.” Her green eyes were as wide as they could go as she stared at the screen, amazed at what she was seeing.
“Yep, that’s her.”
“Her?” Rachael repeated the word with awe in her voice as she gazed up at the doctor.
“Congratulations, Rachael. You’re going to have a baby girl.”
***
“Fuck!” Jackrabbit muttered vehemently under his breath as he raced down the long, laminate tiled hallway. He didn’t notice the shocked look from the elderly woman who was sitting in the waiting room he rushed passed, nor did he pay any attention to the nurse who jumped out of his way at the last minute. He didn’t notice any of that because he was late, again.
Rachael was going to murder him this time, he was sure of it.
I’m too young to die, he thought in agony, pulling out his phone once more to check the time. Nope, he’d been right. He was nearly an hour late. And after he’d promised Rachael he would be there. Guilt ate away at him for a long minute but then a burst of temper flared.
He’d been losing his mind the last few months trying to deal with everything that was going on with Finn. The damned bastard had gone underground and disappeared off the face of the earth. It was as if he’d truly lost interest in his vendetta and left town.
Jackrabbit knew better. He knew Finn would never give up. The half dozen injured Roadburners were all the reminder he needed that his old war buddy hadn’t left for good.
Rachael had been starting to stay with him more and more. After you told her that you didn’t like her and the baby living above a shitty dive bar. An inner voice mocked. He growled right back. I didn’t. I just don’t like the idea of it. It’s not safe.
Oh, right, like that’s the only reason, the voice argued. It definitely didn’t have anything to do with you wanting her closer to you so you could keep an eye on her now that there’s an untraceable maniac on the loose.
Jackrabbit just shook his head, trying to make sense of the thoughts. It was true, there was no use in denying it. He wasn’t even going to fucking try. But the reminder of Finn had his hackles rising as he stomped towards the doctor’s office at the end of the long hallway.
It wasn’t just his blood Finn was after, it was anyone who had connections to the Roadburners, and Rachael sure as hell did. It wasn’t safe for her anywhere else.
Keep telling yourself that, buddy. That voice spoke once more and this time Jackrabbit grit his teeth, forcing it into silence. Damned if he was going to wound up arguing with his own damn self. He was already headed for the fight of the century with Rachael. He didn’t need to add to his own misery.
Jackrabbit shrugged his shoulders. With everything that was going on, with Rachael and the baby, and the threat of Finn hanging over his head, he was beginning to feel more and more claustrophobic. He wasn’t used to being tied down. He didn’t know how to even be in a relationship with someone anymore. Not after he swore off it for good.
Usually, when things began to move beyond just the having fun stage, he bolted without a backwards glance. But not this time. He thought with a sigh. He needed to focus on finding Finn. But it was damned difficult to do with her always there in the back of his mind, always in his thoughts even when he knew she shouldn’t be.
“Fuck.” He growled again, his mind all tied up in too many knots for him to even begin unraveling and then it was too late. He was out of time. Rachael stepped out of the office, one hand resting over her rounded belly as she closed the door behind her.
She didn’t see him at first and he took the opportunity just to drink in the sight of her. Those lush curves that had first drawn him were even more pronounced. Her dark auburn hair normally reached past her shoulders but she had it pulled up in a messy bun that left loose strands teasing around her neck.
Her features were smooth, her green eyes dancing with a light of their own. A small, mysterious smile played around her lips, lips that he was dying for a taste of. But when she glanced up, her gaze locking onto his, and any hope of a sweet kiss hello dwindled into ash.
Her smile faded, and in its place was an angry frown. Jackrabbit braced himself for the inevitable explosion. But it never came. Slowly, he blinked open his eyes again.
It always amazed him. He could face down a whole crew of rival bikers and not flinch. But pitted against Rachael, well, she had him twisted around her finger in no time flat. And this time was certainly no different.
“Hi.” He said softly, hesitantly holding a hand out but dropped it when she continued to glare at him. He rushed to fill the tense silence. “I know. I know I’m late. I got caught up at the clubhouse. I can’t apologize enough, but—”
Rachael interrupted him with a massive sigh. Some of the tension went out of her as her eyes softened on his. “It’s okay, Jackrabbit. Really, I get it.”
He looked at her doubtfully. This was definitely one of those times where she might be saying it was okay but actually wasn’t. But he wasn’t about to say anything to the contrary. Instead, he turned so he was walking with her side by side.
“At least let me drive you home.” Jackrabbit said. “I had one of the guys drop me off. You really shouldn’t be driving.”
“I’m pregnant, Johnny, not sick.” Rae retorted softly. “Besides, there wasn’t anyone else to take me so I took myself.” She added the last under her breath and he had to shrug away another surge of guilt.
They walked out to the parking lot in silence and Jackrabbit hurried to open the passenger side of Rachael’s jeep before taking the keys and rushing around the car to get in the driver’s seat.
The silence laste
d as he started the car, pulled out of the parking lot, and soon they were well on their way back to his place. He lasted about ten more minutes before he couldn’t take anymore.
“So, how was the appointment?” Jackrabbit asked. His hands were tight on the steering wheel as he tried to fight of the stilted tension that had filled the air between them.
Rachael sent him a sidelong look and a shrug. “It was fine.”
“Fine.” He repeated under his breath. “Just fine? You’re sure? Everything is okay with the baby? With you?”
Her look softened a little as she wrapped her arms around her middle in a sweet gesture, nodding slowly and that damned smile was back as she stared down at where their baby was growing inside her.
“Yes, the baby is good. I’m good. We’re all good.” She looked over at him and the anger was gone from her eyes.