Ruined (Roadburners MC Book 2)

by Brook Wilder

  Hatchet closed his eyes and exhaled, muttering. “You got that right.”

  “I heard that.”

  “Good. It means you’re listening to me for once.”

  “I always listen to you,” Jackrabbit said. “I may not always take your advice, but I do listen.”

  “Well, I wish you’d start taking my advice a little more often.” Hatchet glared at him. “It’d save us both a whole lot of trouble.”

  “Come on now, Hatchet, what trouble have I caused you? You know this Finn shit isn’t on me. It’s on Mad Dog and his own problems with the crazy bastard.”

  Hatchet sighed, leaning against the desk. “I’m not talking about Finn. I’m talking about Elsie.”

  Jackrabbit threw his hands up in the air in a gesture of mock innocence. “Hey, I haven’t done anything to, with, or around your wife so you can just take that right back.”

  “Elsie talked to Rachael.”

  At the sound of her name, his heart lurched painfully in his chest and all the air rushed from his lungs. He couldn’t breathe. For a second, Jackrabbit was afraid he might black out in front of Hatchet.

  But the moment passed, and he asked. “How is she?”

  He was half afraid to hear the answer. On the one hand, he didn’t want to find out that she was doing bad—not taking care of herself because she was still as hung up on him as he was on her. He wanted her to be happy and healthy and safe, but that would mean she was over him and he didn’t know if he could handle that either.

  But Hatchet didn’t answer. Instead, there was a hard flat look in his eyes. “You could ask her yourself, you know.”

  “You know I can’t, Hatch.”

  “What are you going to do, Rabbit? After all of this, when all this shit is done with. What are you going to do then? You’re gonna keep fighting? You’re gonna stay at war?”

  Jackrabbit was quiet for a moment, mulling over the question before he spoke again. “I can’t think about that right now. Chances are good I’m not even going to survive this. I did the right thing.” He paused for a moment. “I did the right thing, Hatch.” But even to his own ears it sounded like was trying to convince his friend rather than stating a fact.

  “But you didn’t.” Hatchet just shook his head sadly before clapping Jackrabbit hard on the shoulder, a serious look burning in his dark eyes. “War’s over, Rabbit. We’re home. We’re not in the suck anymore. We can end this peacefully.”

  “We can try. But Finn won’t.” Jackrabbit said. Finn would never surrender. The man just wasn’t wired that way. Losing wasn’t in his blood.

  “He might not but we have to. You have to. For Rachael and for that baby of yours that’s due any day now. You don’t have a choice, Rabbit.”

  He tried to shrug off his friend’s words but they still stung. He turned hard eyes towards Hatchet.

  “I did what I had to, Hatch!”

  “No, you did what was easy.” Hatchet shot back, his voice low and angry.

  Jackrabbit was shocked. “Easy? You think that was easy? It tore me apart to do what I did!”

  “Yeah, Rabbit. Easy.” Hatchet said. “It was easy to push her away than letting yourself actually trust someone, than to actually care about someone other than yourself, isn’t it?”

  “Care? I love her, you son of a bitch!” Jackrabbit’s hands curled into fists and he was one second away from letting one fly when he saw Hatchet suppressing a grin. The man was laughing! His shoulders were shaking because he was trying to keep it in.

  “It’s about damn time you figured it out.” The grin on Hatchet’s face grew wider and he added a few chuckles in just to rub salt in the wound.

  After a few moments, Hatchet’s laughter died off and a serious, questioning expression crossed his face.

  “You love her. So, what are you going to do about it?”

  Jackrabbit just shook his head, still reeling from the realization.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Elsie had been gone for an hour but Rachael still can’t get her words out of her head. It was all too easy for her to imagine Johnny getting lost in his work, throwing himself in one hundred percent—so much so that he forgot that he has to do basic things like eat and sleep. Someone should be there, to make sure he takes care of himself.

  You could be there. You could be the one to take care of him. A soft voice whispered from deep inside her, and maybe he could take care of you too.

  I don’t need anyone to take care of me. Never have, never will. Rachael shot back, crossing her hands over her body that felt like it had grown too big for itself.

  Everyone needs love. That voice whispered back and the truth of it settled deep inside her.

  She had run from that truth for so long. Pretending to be strong and telling herself that she didn’t need anyone or anything, that she had herself and that was perfectly alright with her.

  It had started after her mother left, she knew. The fear. To trust. To open up. To love. It had started then but as the years and unhealthy relationships added up—more than she could count—the fear only grew more and more vicious until it had been nearly impossible to let anyone in.

  But Johnny had.

  Somehow, he scaled the walls she built around her heart and climbed in without her even realizing. Somehow, he curled up so deep inside her that she didn’t think she’d ever get him out again.

  And damn it, she didn’t want to. She wanted him there—a part of her just as much as she would be a part of him.

  It hit her like a bolt of lightning. She had made a mistake. A big stupid mistake. And she couldn’t wait another minute to make it right. She couldn’t waste another single day, another second without him. Rachael glanced down at her belly. Not just for her, but for her baby’s sake as well. Ours, his voice corrected her in her head. Our baby.

  Without giving her time to second guess herself, Rachael pushed herself out of bed. Or she tried, at least. With a huff of impatience she rolled back onto the mattress. It was like there was a magnet trying to keep her down.

  “Damn it, come on Rachael. You can do this! Just stand up, you’ve been doing it your whole life!” But even with her little pep talk all she could manage was to get her head and shoulders mostly off the pillows. Her legs were struggling somewhere, hidden by the massive hemisphere of her tummy.

  With a sigh of defeat, Rachael let herself drop back to the bed, considering her options. Option A, she could lay there and continue to wallow, or option B, she could call for help. Option B was almost as hard for her as the first, but it’s not like she had a choice at the moment.

  “Hell.” Rachael muttered vehemently to herself before drawing in a big breath. “Hannah!” She shouted, her voice carrying through her old house. “Hannah, get your butt in here right now!”

  Rachael nearly grinned as she heard the scurry of her twin sister making her way up the stairs, panting furiously as she burst in to the bedroom.

  “What? What is it? Is it the baby? Is everything okay?” Hannah asked. Her eyes were wide, scanning the room as if searching for some external threat before finally giving a questioning look to Rachael.

  She was still fighting the grin but it faded into a surly expression as she answered. “I need help.”

  “Okay, what do you need?” Hannah asked, concern still in her identical green gaze as she walked over to the bed.

  Rachael took a deep breath, releasing her confession on a sigh, “I need help getting up out of bed and I can’t because I’m enormous.”

  “You are not enormous.” Her sister said kindly as she walked around to the side closest to her and held out a hand to help. “What you are is pregnant.”

  “I feel like a whale. Like a beached whale.” Rachael said, irritated by the whole thing. She hated having to ask for help, especially from Hannah.

  “You are not—”

  Rachael shot her a flat stare to cut off Hannah’s words.

  “Fine.” Hannah sighed. “Come on, upsy daisy.” She bent down, took
Rachael’s hand into one hand, and slid the other one around her shoulders. “Okay, on three. One. Two. Three!”

  It took more effort than Rachael thought possible but by the end of it, her two feet were planted firmly on the floor beneath her.

  “If I ever try and mope in bed for a month, remind me of this moment. It’ll be a great deterrent.” Rachael rolled her eyes up at her sister, who just grinned down at her. The grin grew into a bubble of laughter a moment later Rachael joined in.

  Finally, with Hannah’s arm still supporting her, she started the awkward shuffle out of the bedroom.

  “Where do you want to go, the kitchen? The bathroom?” Hannah asked, already anticipating the latter, but Rachael stopped in her heels and turned instead to the front door.

  “No, I’m going to the club house.” She finally said.

  Hannah gaped at her. “What? What are you talking about, Rae?”

  “I’m going to the Roadburners clubhouse to see Johnny. As hard as it is for me to say this, you were right,” She nearly had to bite her tongue to get the words out, but somehow, she did. “I know I made a mistake, and I need to fix it.”

  “Right now? Are you serious?” An edge of sarcasm tinged Hannah’s voice. “You need to go right this minute?”

  “Yes, right now.” Rachael nodded sternly. “Hannah, I need to make things right before this baby is born.”

  “Can’t you, I don’t know, use a phone or something?”

  “No! I need to see Johnny. Right now!” She stomped her foot.

  After a long moment of silent staring, Hannah’s shoulder dropped in defeat. “There’s no stopping you, is there?” She finally asked.

  Rachael shook her head. “No, so don’t even try.” She stopped suddenly on her way to the front door and gave her sister a bashful look. “But first, I need to go to the bathroom.”

  Hannah snorted out a laugh, shaking her head as she helped Rachael to the small room just down the small hallway. She was still waiting there, leaning against the door outside the bathroom when Rachael came out a few minutes later after a much needed teeth brushing and hair combing.

  “What?” Rachael noticed her sister’s pointed stare as she dug her car keys from the purse that hung on a hook by the front door.

  “I know there’s no stopping you. You got that stubborn look in your eyes.” Hannah sighed before she reached out to snag the keys from Rachael’s fingers. “But I’m driving.”

  Rachael rolled her eyes but had no choice as her sister helped her outside and into the passenger’s side seat. Once inside though, she was grateful. She honestly wasn’t sure if she would have been able to even get into the car on her own, let alone drive it. But she kept her smugly satisfied smile to herself as Hannah climbed into the driver’s seat and started the engine.

  It wasn’t until Hannah had checked and double checked the rearview and side mirrors, and they were partway out of the driveway that she shot Rachael a sideways look.

  “So, where exactly am I going?” She asked softly.

  “Take Highway Thirty-Four East. I’ll let you know when we get close to the turn off.” Rachael said as she finally got her seat belt buckled. It had only taken ten minutes of wrestling with the thing to get it over her middle.

  “I’ve never been to a biker gang’s hideout before.” Hannah whispered the words, more to herself than Rachael.

  “It’s a club, not a gang.” She corrected, unable to hide the big grin spreading across her face.

  Her prim and proper sister in the middle of a rough and tumble biker clubhouse. Now that was something she was looking forward to seeing. But then she remembered the true reason they were on their way to the Roadburners club house and a nervous flutter started up inside her stomach.

  She knew she was doing the right thing. She’d put it off for too long, but she knew she needed to make things right between them, between her and Johnny. It was now or never.

  A little over a half an hour later, they were pulling off on the hidden side road that led to the club house. As Hannah pulled into the gravel parking lot, Rachael glanced around and noticed just how empty it was. But she was too focused to pay attention to the oddness of it all.

  Hannah found a spot, parked, and stared up at the building for a moment after turning off the car.

  “It looks like a warehouse.” She finally said.

  “It is a warehouse,” Rachael said, busy wrestling once more with the damned seatbelt, “They converted it. It was abandoned.” She growled the words, reaching as far as she could to try and unbuckle the seat belt but her fingers could barely reach the button.

  Finally, Hannah noticed and took pity, reaching over to release the seat belt. Rachael heaved a sigh of relief. A moment later, Hannah hopped out of the car, earning a glare from Rachael at the ease with which she got to her feet. But she soon came about Rachael’s side and pulled open the door to help her out.

  Rachael’s feet started moving, almost of their own accord. They took her towards the familiar front door of the clubhouse and inside. Her eyes searched desperately for the one person she needed to see more than anyone else in the whole world.

  Rachael barely noticed Hannah following tentatively behind her as she walked inside, blinking her eyes to adjust to the sudden dimness. Had someone turned off all the lights? What the hell was going on?

  But then all thoughts dissipated and her breath was backed up in her lungs because she saw him. Johnny. My Johnny. And he was running towards her, a shocked expression on his handsome face.

  “Rae?” He asked through a choked gasp. “What are you? How are you?”

  “Hush, the only thing that matters is that I’m here,” Rachael said, laying a finger across his lips to stop his tirade of half-finished questions.

  She stared up into his face, drinking him in. It had been so long. Too long. “I was such a fool, Johnny.”

  “No, it was me, but–”

  “Let me finish!” Rachael cut him off, “I should never have walked out that night. With everything that had happened, I just—I was afraid. I was terrified. Of you. Of what you make me feel. Of how much I love you. It scared the hell out of me. It still does,” She added on a nervous laugh. “I came here because. Well, because I needed you to know. I couldn’t waste another day not telling you, not making things right with you because…because the truth is that I need you, Johnny. And this baby needs you.”

  Rachael bit her lip, forcing herself to stop the stream of words. Once she started, all of it just fell out and now she stood there, open, exposed, and vulnerable. All the things that she promised herself she would never be again.

  She looked up at him, uncertain and scared. She told him the truth and it terrified her. Now, all she could do was wait.

  She didn’t have to wait long. In a rush, Jackrabbit’s arms were around her, sweeping her close in a hug that sent warmth seeping through her body. His lips rained kissed over her cheeks, her forehead, her lips, everywhere he could reach. Peppered in between each kiss, she could hear his roughly spoken whispers.

  “I love you too. So much.” He whispered. “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

  Finally, Jackrabbit pulled back, staring down at her with a mix of awe and consternation.

  “I love you, Rae. But god damn, woman, do you have terrible timing.” He shook his head.

  She looked up at him in question and felt a strange pull in her abdomen, but was too focused on him to notice.

  “What do you mean–?”

  She never got the whole question out before a storm of bullets ripped through the clubhouse, shattering all the windows and turning tables and chairs into matchwood. Jackrabbit grabbed her, and quickly dragged her behind the bar, where Harlow had been crouched, hidden and unseen.

  Jackrabbit gave her one last searing kiss before pointing a stiff finger at the other man.

  “Protect her with your life.” He ordered, and Harlow nodded, just as serious.

  “What the hell’s going on?” Rachael
asked numbly, her eyes going wide as she felt another pull, stronger this time, sharper and more insistent. “Johnny? Johnny!”

  “No time.” Jackrabbit said. He gave her a long, tortured look. Suddenly, he was holding a gun in each hand, rushing out into the midst of the gunfire.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  “Fuck!” Jackrabbit cursed vehemently under his breath as he forced himself to leave Rachael in the care of Harlow and head back into the main area of the bar, where Hatchet and several others of the Roadburner crew had been strategically placed.

  That, at least, was all part of the plan.