Rhythm

by Gem Sivad

  Having turned down a ride for the second visit to the doctor’s office, I thought that was the end of the matter.

  Not so. I took the bus on the day of my appointment and arrived without a problem. Afterward, when I left the medical building, I walked to the light at the crosswalk and waited for the light to change. I was thinking about baby stuff, Marty stuff, work stuff, and stuff in general, instead of paying attention. Okay, sue me.

  Anyway, the light changed, I started to cross the street, and the next thing I knew, someone grabbed the neck of my shirt and hauled me back onto the sidewalk.

  Being assaulted that way scared the bejesus out of me. I reacted by pivoting and plowing my fist into my attacker’s face. Jack’s face.

  I couldn’t believe he’d been following me and I hadn’t even known he was there.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” I yelled. I’d been in the path of the vehicle and I had that hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach a near death experience tends to bring. So, my voice reflected my panic as well as my being pissed.

  “Damned minivan almost got you,” he’d snarled back, rubbing his jaw.

  He didn’t like it that I’d caught him off guard and popped him in the face. I didn’t like it that he’d grabbed me, and I hadn’t even known he was there.

  I let him drive me home because we were both shaken. But I told him I’d be walking in the future, just the same. I didn’t realize Jack spent his day loitering outside the edge of my property until the first time I took an Elaine-break to walk to the store.

  “Want a lift?” There he was, leaning against his Ford Explorer.

  “No thank you. I need the exercise.”

  He nodded. Instead, he crept along in the SUV, driving at a snail’s pace beside me and speeding up to remain parallel when I jogged.

  I finally walked to the vehicle and knocked on the window. He rolled it down.

  “Why are you following me?”

  “Security detail.” And he said that with a straight face. “You’re accident prone.”

  “I don’t need a bodyguard.’”

  “I’m not guarding you.” He glared at me.

  “Then go home, wherever that is. Not back to my house.”

  “You almost got run over,” he reminded me. “I’m not guarding you. I’m babysitting Marty’s kid.”

  “I can’t believe you just said that.” I gave him the evil-eye, guaranteed to make the meanest seventh grade hoodlum squirm in his seat. Jack’s face got red.

  “Aww, come on. Get in. If you don’t let me give you a ride, Elaine will report to Marty I’m not earning my keep.”

  I seriously doubted that Elaine would tattle on Jack. Then again, I glanced over my shoulder at the house. Even from this far up the street I could see her staring out the window at us.

  “I’ll ride back with you,” I promised, then turned to jog up the street at a faster clip than I’d been going. It felt wonderful. I’d really been slacking off and this was my wake-up call to get in shape before…

  I slowed down. Dr. Spencer had recommended exercise, I’d have to check with her to find out how much was allowed. Still… I rested my hand on my belly hoping the baby would feel the excitement and not the jarring as I jogged. I cut through the park to lose my tail and arrived at the store long before Jack arrived. I’d already picked up bread, milk, and Elaine’s lottery tickets when he pulled up.

  I slid into the SUV, set the bags on the floorboards, and buckled up. He backed out of the parking spot and nodded.

  “I knew your granddad,” he said without warning.

  “You don’t know who my grandfather was, so I doubt that.”

  He gave me a sideways look. “You told Marty your granddad owned the house before you. Being curious, I did a title search and bingo. Took me a while because that house is fifty-two years old and it’s been through a lot of hands. But, as soon as I saw the original owner, I knew. You’re Cap Carpenter’s grandkid.”

  Yep, that was me. I didn’t say anything. I didn’t share my personal business. Jack on the other hand, didn’t mind discussing it with me. He’d been digging all right.

  “Holly Anna Carpenter. Only child of William and Anna Smith Carpenter. Parents deceased, killed when a tractor-trailer jackknifed and crushed their car.”

  I closed my eyes, trying not to think about that time.

  “You were nine. Tough time for a kid to be orphaned.”

  “Well actually Jack, any age is a tough one to be orphaned.”

  “Happened to you twice, didn’t it?”

  “You seem to know everything. You’re welcome to my memories. I don’t visit them often.”

  “Well that’s the thing, Holly. You should. I knew Cap when he worked for the Pittsburgh Fire Dept. Hell, Elaine knew him. She used to sit in on the firehouse poker games.”

  I snorted, trying to suppress my laugh.

  “I lost track of Cap. He retired, I found work outside the state. We lost touch. But, he was a good man. You should be proud of him.”

  “I am proud of him. Granddad was a wonderful man. I lived with him for five years until he had a heart attack. He was walking out of the bank up town. People forgot I lived with him. It was a couple of days before anyone remembered and thought to tell me why he hadn’t come home.”

  “How old were you?”

  “Jack, I’ve put the past behind me and I’m happy to let it remain there.”

  He pulled into the driveway and parked before answering me.

  “The way I see it, you’ve got the same problem as Marty. You lost everybody who you loved, and decided you weren’t going to go down that road again.”

  “Works for me,” I told him. I hopped out, grabbed my bags, and walked into the house before he could deliver some more opinions.

  * * *

  Jack had the street covered and Elaine sat in my kitchen running the company and barking orders over the phone like a drill sergeant. Twice a day, she paused in Smoke business, long enough to roll out a spreadsheet, study the odds, and place a call.

  From my eavesdropping, it became clear the other party on the line was Elaine’s bookie. Her mood usually depended on the news delivered during the afternoon conversation.

  “Organize these.” That was Elaine’s directions one afternoon, after she’d scowled through her bookie call. When I half-heartedly protested, she said, “You’re on the clock. I need this done, you need insurance.”

  I’m not a weepy woman. But, her remark reminded me that I’d lost control of my life. I teared up so much I had to leave the room. I didn’t feel comfortable climbing into my closet with Elaine so nearby, so I opted for the backyard and the swing.

  My life has been hijacked. The thing is, I knew that I needed better insurance to cover the cost of the baby. I squirmed on the seat of the swing, embarrassed, as I considered, all the belligerent antagonism I’d heaped on Marty.

  At the same time, I wanted to march into my kitchen and unload on Elaine. Accustomed to being out and about, the switch to homebody left me feeling smothered.

  Count your blessings, numb-nut, I told myself. This is for the baby. Marty could have said, ‘tough shit’ and ‘goodbye,’ Instead, he’s… super-pain-in-the-ass-expectant-dad.

  “I should be grateful for all his help.” Inevitably my mind returned to my grievance. He’s a bulldozer disguised as a man. Elaine isn’t even disguised. Geez. How did I get myself into this?

  Oh yeah. I had sex with a virtual stranger. Now said stranger’s entourage was taking over my life. I wanted to scream at everyone to leave me the fuck alone, at the same time, day by day, I shared more parts of my life.

  Both the weather and my condition limited my freedom these days. Even before Marty’s edict, I’d given up my Humble Home job because of the lifting part. Sadly, I hadn’t earned enough to make a dent in my kitchen remodeling plan. The school holidays as well as the mostly good weather with spring sunshine, albeit, occasionally offset by snow flurries, reduced my substitute
teaching time.

  Fuming at Elaine from the comfort of my backyard swing, I acknowledged the incredible dent Marty’s rent check had made in my financial worries. So much so that I switched from being panicked at a looming money crunch, to being concerned about developing dependence on him.

  Yeah, the after part just loomed bigger in my mind all the time. I mean, I wanted the baby to have a mom and dad. I just didn’t want to lean so much on dad right now that I wouldn’t be able to survive later on without him.

  For having only been here a brief time, Marty had already marked his territory outside as well as in. He’d mown the grass before he left, but it had begun to look shaggy again. I debated mowing it, or nagging him about it when we next talked. The potential opportunity to scold Marty made me grin. I’ll give him a reason to come back.

  I skittered past that thought, and examined the flowers struggling in the corner of the yard. Not much to see yet. I left the swing to investigate what I remembered to be grandma’s tulip bed.

  I squatted on my heels to get a better look. Green tendrils were pushing through the soil, and a hint of yellow crocuses had already appeared. The trees had buds showing but leaves hadn’t unfurled yet. Mother Nature seemed to be as indecisive as me this year.

  My sojourn in the yard turned into a great therapy session. After I had my temper under control, I did what I should have done from the beginning—went back inside and sorted.

  If I ever got fed up with Marty’s spy, I’d evict her. As it was, any time we had weather fit enough for me to be outside, I escaped Elaine to spend time in my flower garden, watching the plants grow. Gestating. Gah…

  But after Marty had been gone almost two weeks, it became apparent that Elaine heard from the crew before anyone else did. I’d had three brief calls from him, each bordering on contentious as he requested detailed updates on my health.

  “What was your blood pressure?” he’d led off with.

  “One fifteen over seventy-five,” I answered. “Why?”

  “Just checking,” he answered. “What about your blood work? Did it all come back normal?”

  “Yes. No problems there.”

  “You’re sleeping and eating okay? No indigestion? Insomnia?” Marty continued, pausing after each question as if recording my answers.

  “Did Garret supply your list of questions,” I finally asked.

  “It pays to have a doctor in the family.” His answer neither admitted nor denied his long-distance health monitoring. The first time it happened, I thought, okay, he’s the baby’s father and of course he has a right to know this stuff.

  The second call repeated the same questions. As did the third. No time for conversation other than one clinical health check after another.

  “He’s overdue taking a break,” Elaine groused at me on Thursday morning of the second week. “Tired men make mistakes,” she continued, glaring at me as if I had some power to make him behave.

  “Well, tell him to come home,” I answered.

  “Hah. Like he’d listen to me.” Her meaningful stare suggested I had some power to make Marty mind. “You should ask him to come home.”

  I laughed out loud. “Elaine, I don’t think you understand. My association with Marty is strictly business. He’s a tenant in my house, we don’t have a relationship.”

  “Yes, you do.” Her gaze shifted to my stomach. “Use it.”

  My name didn’t have to be Sherlock for me to deduce Elaine’s responsibility when Megan and Harley-Jane descended on me that afternoon. My friends shared Elaine’s opinion. Both had fire in their eyes.

  “She’s right. The Smoke, Inc. crew should come home,” Harley-Jane agreed immediately. “They’ve got to be exhausted. Tired men make mistakes.”

  “It was Teague’s turn on the SAT-phone last night. He said Marty’s been talking to a local agency about extending the Smoke, Inc. contract.” Megan studied her nails and added, “Teague says with the baby on the way, Marty’s suddenly all about making money.”

  Why is this my fault? I whined mentally. My closet called to me as I faced them. I told myself that I wanted to veg and think. I needed the darkness to calm my nerves. I craved quiet time alone.

  “I may have misremembered the date and told him you were going to see the doctor today,” Elaine murmured innocently.

  “You lied to Marty?”

  “Whatever. He’ll call.”

  “And he’ll ask me my blood pressure, if I’m retaining any fluids, last time he asked if I’d started to gain weight yet. I can’t wait to hear–”

  “Promise him sex,” Elaine interrupted.

  Reluctantly or not, in a totally weird way, I’d been pulled into the Smoke, Inc. family. And as the boss’s-baby’s-gestating-mama, they expected me to make him mind and reward him with sex.

  “You know,” I drawled, grinning at them. “I’m not promising Marty squat. He’s driving me nuts. Because of him, I’m under-exercised. And, and no offense, Elaine, but I’m totally, freaking-bored out of my mind.”

  I had their attention. “We need an intervention,” I announced. “I’ll call Roger.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Marty

  Thoughts about the baby stayed in my head as the Smoke, Inc. crew plunged straight into fortifying the firebreak. I usually did well separating personal from business, but not this time.

  Me, fathering a kid, seemed impossible. Kit and I had tried… Maybe Kit had been sick longer than we’d known. Holly, on the other hand… One time and bam. Like I said, I just couldn’t wrap my head around it.

  I feared the tests had been wrong and she’d come back from the doctor with a different diagnosis. God forbid it was anything serious. I calmed myself by thinking about the woman herself. Holly looked fit, more than fit, blooming.

  I admit, conversations with Holly were difficult. If she wasn’t my baby’s mother, I’d pass on knowing her. Too much… I pictured her in my mind and swallowed a groan.

  Too much, my ass, I sneered at myself. I thought about how it had felt curled around her in that big bed. Baby or not I wanted more of her. But, she didn’t want more of me.

  She claimed I was being nosey. Fuck that. It’s my right to follow the progress of my seed as it gestates. She said I was a pompous ass.

  I laughed at that one, because, yeah, sometimes I am. But, I can take a hint. Not wanting to set her blood pressure sky rocketing, I decided it best to focus strictly on my kid. That meant eliminating all the personal blathering I wanted to share with his mama.

  Because she didn’t want personal. That was being nosey. So, instead, I timed my calls to coincide with her doctor’s visits which she had each week. When I called in between, to hear her voice and make sure she sounded okay, I focused the conversation on her health since that was an acceptable topic.

  She had a doctor’s visit scheduled each week. Garret explained that Holly had been designated a high-risk pregnancy because of her age and her first-time birthing status.

  “Marty, it doesn’t mean Holly’s sick or that there’s anything wrong with the kid. Most first pregnancies in women her age are watched more closely.”

  “Christ. You act like she’s an old woman. She’s only…” Shit, I didn’t even know her age. And that pissed me off all over again.

  “Holly’s twenty-nine, Marty,” Garret had supplied information I should have already known.

  Even out on the job, if I contemplated Holly long enough, I ended up grinding my teeth. So, I thought about our kid instead, and prepared questions for when I called. I figured out fast that if I let her take the lead, I got more conversation time with her. It surprised me when she seemed worried about me.

  “Are you okay? I’m following the news and it looks bad from here.” Hearing Holly’s concern for me made me happy though I didn’t want her worrying about anything.

  The last thing I intended to do was tell her it was a goddamned nightmare here. Jesus. Hell couldn’t be any hotter and the changing wind patterns, well…
<
br />   “Lost my eyebrows when the wind shifted,” I told her. “Otherwise, I’m good.” I thought that was probably too much information, so I backed up to the topic of weather. “What we really need is heavy rain.” I couldn’t think of anything else to say after that.

  “I don’t know when I’ll get a call through again. Don’t give Elaine fits. Take care of yourself. Keep a spot in Grandpa’s bed warm for me.” I added the last to remind her of my proprietary interest in her sleeping arrangement.

  Her laughter broke through all the stilted bull shit we’d been shoveling at each other. I knew I had a smile plastered on my face, and I suspected she did too. Mission accomplished. My next call from Jack wiped the grin right off.

  “Girlfriend almost bought the dust the other day. Had I not pulled her ass out of the way, she’d be roadkill under a van’s front tire.”

  What the hell? “Explain.” He did. I told him to stick close to her from now on. Christ. Along with every other quirk, she appeared to be accident prone.

  “At least she’s got quick reflexes,” he’d reported, explaining that she’d punched him in the face when he’d grabbed her.

  “Jack says you almost got run over the other day,” I said as soon as I reached Holly again.

  “Jack exaggerates,” she answered, supplying no other explanation.

  “Says you clipped him a good one,” I added.

  “He’ll live. I didn’t hurt him much. It wasn’t a big deal.”

  “Did you or did you not almost step into the path of van?” I demanded, getting irritated.

  “I did not.”

  “So, what the hell is Jack talking about?”

  She sighed, irritating me even more. “I was waiting at the bus stop. Standing on the edge of the curb so I could be first in line to get on. A vehicle swerved too close, Jack, who I did not even know was lurking behind me, grabbed me by the collar and jerked me backward. It startled me, and I swung around and punched him. No big drama. End of story.”

  “Why the hell don’t you just let Jack drive you to and from?”