Heaven's Hell

by Takerra, Allen

  “Heaven!”

  She stopped in her tracks, but didn’t turn around.

  “Come back here,” he demanded.

  She backtracked her steps and made her way the couch where he was now seated. She felt like she was walking to her execution.

  “Sit down, Heaven,” he insisted, a little more calmly.

  She sat down and couldn’t control the lone single tear that traveled down her cheek. G’s heart broke, but he kept his game face on.

  “Look, I don’t know what the fuck made you take that shit, and I really don’t know what made you listen to Angie, of all people.” He paused and looked into her brown eyes. “And I don’t know what happened with you and Loc, or what would have happened if I hadn’t come along.”

  “G-” Heaven tried to intervene, but he cut her off by raising up a finger.

  “Let me finish. I’m just gonna chalk that shit up, or I’m gonna try to, by assuming that you made a mistake. And that any behavior you demonstrated last night, was not something you would normally do.”

  Heaven breathed a deep sigh of relief and felt a rush of emotions. She prepared to speak, but G cut her off again.

  “Listen Hev, I really need to believe that I can trust you. You really made me doubt that last night, but I’m going to give you a pass, because I know that all this shit, this lifestyle, you not used to this shit. I saw you last night Heaven, the makeup, the hair, the clothes, none of that shit was you. Trust me, if I wanted that, I would have that. I thought long about this shit, but I think you’re something special. Trust me, if I didn’t, you would be done. Just don’t disappoint me Heaven.”

  Emotion overwhelmed Heaven as the tears flowed from her eyes. She would never disappoint him again. She rushed to his arms for his embrace and he hugged her, more loosely than she hugged him.

  He was still upset, she could tell, and she respected that, but she was just so happy to have another chance that it didn’t matter. Adoration and sentiment overpowered her heart and she released those three words as she rested her head on his shoulder.

  “I love you G. I love you so much, and I will never disappoint you again.”

  The words stunned G into silence and he didn’t know how to respond. He cared for Heaven deeply, he had to for him to give her another chance, but his mind was on repairing the relationship with his cousin, not only for business but also out of his own guilt, so this had him taken back.

  So he only did what he knew best to do. He held her tighter and then pulled back, looking deep into her eyes, and then he kissed her long, slow, and sweet. And Heaven was satisfied with that.

  “Go! Go! Go!” Heaven chanted loudly, leaning over the bars and pumping her fist wildly in the air. “Yeaaahhhh baby!”

  They were at the Belmont Park Horse Races in Elmont, New York, and Heaven was betting on her new favorite horse.

  “Look at her G, she’s winning!” She screamed excitedly, but G only had one ear in the races.

  The other ear, was temporarily being lent to a young Caucasian stockbroker who was trying to convince G to invest more, and most importantly, invest with him.

  Shay and Loc were there, and so were many of the other people who had become apart of Heaven’s new immediate circle, G’s workers, and the wives, girlfriends, and baby mommas of those workers.

  It had been four days since the Loc birthday party-ecstasy-big fight and drama incident, and Heaven wanted for nothing more than it to be put to rest, and it seemed as if her wish had been granted. G and Loc appeared to the regular eye to have gotten past it, Loc was cordial to Heaven and had even apologized for calling her out of her name; she had apologized for her behavior as well. There was still an evident amount of tension and distance between all of them that had not been there before, however they were all still able to come together, be festive, and conduct business with no difficulties.

  With G’s forgiveness, Heaven was once again, back on her high horse and living the life.

  “Miss, please, a bottle of your finest Château Margaux… preferably a ’94 or ’95,” Heaven solicited the waitress.

  “Of course, Mrs. Lucas.”

  Mrs. Lucas, I like that!

  “Mrs. Lucas?” Shay asked jokingly, awakening Heaven out of her daydream. “Wow, are we there yet?”

  Heaven tilted down her Cavalli shades with her dainty left manicured hand and eyed Shay, she still wasn’t feeling her, at all, but played nice.

  “Maybe,” Heaven remarked snidely.

  Shay did not like Heaven’s new attitude, and from the moment they arrived at the track, Heaven’s very aura seemed to demean Shay. Shay remembered back to when she was lending the girl her very first designer sunglasses, now she was looking down at her, out of her own.

  “And what’s with the Margaux? Chantalle, or whatever?” Shay mispronounced.

  “Château,” Heaven corrected, eyes on her horse.

  “Whatever,” Shay laughed. “What happened to iced tea? You know, you still are under aged Heaven,” Shay laughed, now leaning against the railings with her.

  Heaven felt like Shay was taking a stab at her and felt the need to retaliate. She was already not feeling her and at this point, she was sick of her shit. She looked down and used her hands to smooth her form fitting knit dress.

  “Well, I like it Shay. G introduced it to me. Maybe I’ll tell G to give Loc a raise so that he can introduce it to you… or maybe I’ll tell him to give you one, so that you can introduce it to yourself.”

  Shay chuckled and rolled her eyes. She turned to Heaven with a fake smile.

  “You know what Heaven, I’ve been letting you go a lot lately with this new and improved attitude of yours, but you got one more good time to come out of your mouth like that, before I introduce you to my fist. Real talk, boo.”

  “Real talk?” Heaven giggled.

  “Yeah, real talk,” Shay responded, now standing up straight.

  “Okay Shay. Well real talk, maybe I was a little out of line with my statement.”

  Shay calmed a little and Heaven continued.

  “I take it back, real talk, Loc probably can afford the ’95 edition of the Château Margaux, or whatever he would prefer to drink. Real talk, though, he probably just wouldn’t splurge it, on you.”

  “Fuck you Heaven.”

  “No, thanks,” She answered cockily.

  Shay laughed louder now.

  “Wow, okay, Angie!” Shay shot back, not even believing how much Heaven sounded like the bubble headed trick. “You know what, it’s a wrap for you shorty. But remember, all that glitters, aint fucking gold. Shit don’t last forever baby girl. Enjoy your Chanteau!” Shay added, walking away.

  “Château,” Heaven corrected again, looking back at her horse.

  “Whatever!”

  G noticed the small commotion and wondered what was going on. Shay and Heaven hadn’t been the same lately.

  “Excuse me for a minute.”

  G walked away from the long-winded broker and made his way to a now tense Heaven. He wrapped his arms around her from behind and watched the race with her for a few seconds before addressing the issue.

  “What’s up with you and Shay, baby girl?”

  Heaven sighed heavily.

  “I don’t know what’s wrong with her G. Lately she’s been taking stabs at me, asking me why I’m drinking and I’m under aged, why I’m wearing this, saying that, eating that, just talking down to me. I think that she’s jealous or something, I just gave her the walking papers though.”

  Women, G thought.

  Heaven turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck. The gorgeous Spring weather and the way he looked and felt, just made it all disappear.

  “I don’t need her, I got you,” Heaven sang sweetly.

  G smiled. “Yeah you do. But yall should still chill with all that shit, it’s petty baby girl, it’s beneath you.”

  Tell me about it, Heaven thought, not really taking G’s words into context.

  G reali
zed that she was not trying to hear it at that moment so he left it alone, he knew women were emotional, shady, went through the motions and he figured they’d be friends again by dinner.

  “I’m gonna run to the bathroom,” G said, with a kiss to Heaven’s forehead. “Okay?”

  “Alright,” Heaven answered, smiling at him, the smile that turned him to putty in her hands.

  G made his way inside and bumped hard into Shay who was rushing out of the door.

  “Damn Shay, you coming at me like a linebacker, where you going?” G joked.

  “Shut up G!” Shay laughed, “I just didn’t want to miss the end, I got money on this, man.”

  They shared a laugh and as G turned to head inside, Shay grabbed his arm.

  “G wait, let me holla at you.”

  He turned his attention to her with a serious face, sensing that this was already about Heaven.

  “What’s on ya mind Shay?”

  Before Shay spoke she took note of how handsome G was looking. She had always thought he was fine, and always enjoyed talking to him, she just knew that this wasn’t going to be one of those enjoyable conversations.

  “Okay,” she started, looking into his eyes. His intense stare made her think twice but she said fuck it. “I just wanted to talk to you about Heaven.”

  “What about her?” He asked, as if he were clueless.

  “Well, you haven’t noticed how different she’s been lately? It’s like this whole lifestyle and everything has her turning into a whole new person. I’m worried about her G, I mean, she’s so different. And I really love her, but I don’t even like her right now.”

  G listened attentively and then put his hands in his pockets. He had noticed a change in Heaven but at the same time, he wasn’t sure where this was coming from with Shay. Was it jealousy? Or was it genuine concern?

  “I mean Shay seriously, I changed myself throughout the years, we all change, that’s growing up. It doesn’t make her a bad person.”

  He loves her. Shay thought, and she didn’t know why she felt so jealous about it, maybe because she wanted someone to love her like that.

  “Yall just need to bury whatever’s going on between yall, cause if it aint nothing crucial, then it aint worth ruining a friendship, you know?”

  Shay gazed at G and nodded her head.

  “Yeah, I know what you’re saying. But I just hope you’re right G.”

  In the meantime, neither of them had noticed Heaven make her way up to the doors. When she heard them talking, she hid on the side so that they couldn’t see. She listened to Shay talk to G about something, or someone.

  “To me G, Heaven being exposed to such a different life so quickly has completely transformed her. And by you ignoring it, it’s like you’re contributing to her downfall. You and me both know how bright, and sweet, and amazing she was, and now, she’s I don’t know, arrogant, conceited, shallow, all of these things. Maybe her going away to school will help her, and she can refocus on her goals. And if you two last through that, then that means what you guys have is real.”

  That bitch! Heaven fumed.

  G chuckled to lighten the mood because he felt like the conversation was all too intense for him. Yes, Heaven had changed, but he felt like he had the situation under control. She was a grounded girl, he had faith in her.

  “Look Shay, I appreciate your concern, I can tell you care about Heaven. But if you can look past the exterior, you’ll see, she’s still the same person. Don’t be too hard on her.”

  G could see by Shay’s demeanor that she was only halfway buying it so he brought her into him for a friendly hug.

  “Come ’ere girl, lighten up a little, let that shit go.”

  Shay hugged G back and inhaled his scent as Heaven watched on in the shadows. Her jaw was tightened and her chest heaved.

  Shay was crazy if she thought that she was going to pull that ‘concerned friend’ card on G and try to move into her spot while Heaven was away at school.

  Bitch thinks she slick! I got something for her ass! Heaven thought. And after G made his way to the bathroom, and Shay made her way to the track, Heaven made her way inside, to order some food like she had planned, all the while thinking of Shay’s betrayal.

  …The Porsche Turns Into a Pumpkin…

  “I’m not going.”

  “What you mean?”

  “You asked me what we’re going to do about Harvard, and I’m telling you that I’m not going.”

  G couldn’t believe his ears. All Heaven had ever talked about was how hard she had worked to be accepted into an Ivy League school, how important college was to her, and how throughout all of her setbacks, she always knew that no matter what, she was Harvard bound. So what had changed? He and Shay’s conversation replayed in his mind as he watched Heaven undress that night in her walk in closet.

  “So where are you going?” He asked, thinking that she had changed her preference.

  She mumbled something in response.

  “What?” G asked, becoming irritated.

  “I said nowhere!” She walked over to him. “Unhook this.”

  G stood still as a statue wondering what came next. He had much to say but wanted to choose his words wisely. He unhooked and unzipped her dress slowly, revealing her smooth caramel back.

  “Heaven, what are you saying? You have to go to school, baby girl,” was all he could concur.

  She turned and faced him using her hands to hold up the front of her dress.

  “No, I don’t. You didn’t go to school.”

  She walked over to her closet and stepped out of the dress, and then hung it on a hanger; she would take it to the cleaners tomorrow.

  G studied her in her lace bra and panties, and as horny as he was and as bad as he wanted her, he needed to fix this.

  “You’re not me Hev, you’re better than me. And this is what you’ve always wanted. You’re going to school.”

  ‘No, I’m not,” She shot back, turning around and facing the closet, putting her shoes on the rack.

  “Heaven-”

  “No, I’m not!” She said again, this time turning around with tears in her eyes. “I’m not going to no fucking Harvard, and leaving you, and then everything we have, it’s just gonna be over, no G! Why do you even want me to leave?” She cried harder.

  He made his way over to the closet to console her.

  “Calm down, okay? I don’t want you to leave me.”

  She shook her head no and tried to walk away but he cupped her face in his hands and stared into her honey eyes.

  “I just want you to live out all your dreams baby girl, I don’t want to hold you back. I’m not going nowhere, I’m gonna be right here with you.”

  Tears streamed down her face.

  “No, you’re not. You’re gonna be right here in New Jersey, and I’m gonna be right there in Massachusetts. And you’re gonna forget me.”

  He pulled her close.

  “I can’t forget you, why you talking crazy? I’m gonna come there, and you’re gonna come home. This is your home baby. It’s not even that far.”

  Heaven buried her head in his chest.

  “A four hour drive,” she mumbled.

  “Or a 24 minute flight,” He smiled back.

  That made her crack a small smile but she had one better.

  “Or, a house in Massachusetts?” She cautiously suggested.

  G didn’t know what to say. He had business here, he had everything here, but if he didn’t have Heaven, he wasn’t too sure how much he really would have. He couldn’t think about that right now.

  “Maybe, eventually,” he answered, keeping it light. Before she could react, he kissed her deeply in her mouth and used his strong arms to pick her up and carry her to the bed.

  Heaven moaned in pleasure as he slowly continued to undress her, kissing her body in between and then undressing himself.

  They kissed for what seemed like hours before G finally entered her, filling her up with every part of him, r
eminding her exactly why she didn’t want to leave him. She was conflicted inside, her dream versus her dream man, as she imagined G handling some other girl the way he was handling her. Briefly she imagined him with Shay, but she pushed the thought out of her mind as she felt herself building up to a climax from G moving swiftly in and out of her. He felt so good, smelled so good, and even tasted good.

  “Ohhh G, oh, right there,” she moaned. Her body began to shake in spasms and she was sure that it didn’t get any better than this. Fuck Harvard, she didn’t care what anyone said, this was her Ivy League and she would make sure that this is where she stayed.

  ‘I love you,” She sang sweetly to him as she could feel his body tensing, about to reach its own breaking point, but all he did was silence her with a kiss.

  Why doesn’t he say it back? Heaven thought, as she tasted his sweet tongue. Mmmmmm… Oh well, a little more time and a pass on college, and I’m gonna make him say it. I’m gonna make him love me.

  A constant, annoying buzzing of the doorbell awoke Heaven out of her deep sleep the following morning. God, will G please answer the door?

  After about thirty more seconds of the sound, Heaven reluctantly climbed out of bed and made her way down the stairs.

  “I’m coming.”

  The house was dead quiet so she assumed that G had stepped out. The bell buzzed two, three, four more times as Heaven made her way to the locks.